confessions of a messy but literate waste of money
I decided to see how many days my mother can go without mentioning how much money i'm costing her. So far her record is zero. zero days. I thought I might start counting conversations, except its hard to figure out what counts as a conversation when so few words pass between us
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Not that this is at all on the same level, but last time I went back to my folks' house, my mom and I were talking about how I'd let my short term health insurance (which only covers catastrophic I-nearly-died emergency type stuff)go for the second 6 months after I graduated. She said, "we would have paid for it" I said "I feel like it's not worth it, plus I kind of feel like if I die I die, and that's ok." Her respone "I have too much invested in you for you to die."
She was definitely referring to the tuition etc over the years.
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My parents don't really complain about the amount of money I'm costing them, but I still often worry about it. I hope by the time I graduate I can look back and say with conviction "yeah, Brown was worth the money and I made the most of it." Not sure if that's gonna happen though.
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I took a year off between Brown and grad school (I leave for W&M on Saturday) and I definitely feel you when you write:
But I don't like being told, scolded, teased, not-so-casually casually remaked to like I was some impluse buy.
I was the first person in my family to go to college and I feel, a lot of the time, that my parents see me as something of a failure because I didn't get this glamorous, high paying job right out of the gate. I don't think they know they're half as obvious about it as they are. I realize that it's hard for them too, but like you said, it's stressful all around.
Take it a day at a time isn't anything like real advice, but it's the best I've got for you. That and this box of good vibes and warm thoughts I'm sending your way.
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