Open your EYES
"Geez fucking Louise", is all I've been saying to myself the past couple of days. Really.
But it ain't all that bad.
Plus, Joshua Tree was really fuckin' gorgeous in the morning.
Except we got lost.
And almost eaten by coyotes.
I remember on the drive up, I saw a church billboard thing that said "praise all firemen, praise them as if they were JESUS", or something like that and wished every single member of that communion a painful and irritated death. Then the next morning I realized it was because almost half the people in that town are firemen and spend every hour of their days trying to keep the entire area from being consumed by brush fires. Oops.
Cory's kitties had to stay at my house for a few days because his house was infested with vermin and therefore, had to be jew-gassed.
The last day, five minutes before we were going to leave with Kiki and Ugboo:
Mom: But why do you have to leave, kitty!
Dad: Kitty!
Today I went hiking up to the caves in the valley and saw red ants the size of lizards and lizards the size of fat gerbils. I carved things into the sandstone walls and threw rocks at glass bottles left over from the numerous kickbacks that clearly take place there. I am so cultured & sophisticated. Then I ate in the truckbed in a parking lot. I might have reached some awesome redneck and/or hippie personal record.
I really like Shelley's new boyfriend.
The only thing I wanted to say was actually these two things:
You - you arrogant little prick. I read your email over and over and it makes me so violently angry. Where have you been stalking me, that you get [false, by the way] information like "3-4 relationships"? Still read my email? Or feverishly check my livejournal? Or try and come over to Mary's uninvited in hopes that she'll tell you what I've been doing? How unbelievably insolent you are, to think that "one day" I'll be unhappy and return to you. Come to you for HELP? For COMFORT? Are you fucking kidding me? I would choose death over being in any kind of relationship with you again. Being with you, whether it be friend or lover, WAS, IS, and ALWAYS WILL BE SUICIDE. Don't entertain hopes of ever seeing me again, it disguists me.
And You - This is too far. I'll call you to discuss it, but you know what's going on already, I'm sure. It's best for you, and for me and him, if this stops. You need to stop thinking about me, because you are not respecting my choice, or my relationship. Call me or I'll call you, because there's more to be said but I just wanted to say, "no more."
Har dee har, I think besides those two, only Katie will understand what in the fuck I am talking about. Perhaps Mary, if she's checking up on me from the Motherland [which I sorely hope she will! I miss her!].
Why am I wearing a dog collar? Because I'm in love.
But it ain't all that bad.
Plus, Joshua Tree was really fuckin' gorgeous in the morning.
Except we got lost.
And almost eaten by coyotes.
I remember on the drive up, I saw a church billboard thing that said "praise all firemen, praise them as if they were JESUS", or something like that and wished every single member of that communion a painful and irritated death. Then the next morning I realized it was because almost half the people in that town are firemen and spend every hour of their days trying to keep the entire area from being consumed by brush fires. Oops.
Cory's kitties had to stay at my house for a few days because his house was infested with vermin and therefore, had to be jew-gassed.
The last day, five minutes before we were going to leave with Kiki and Ugboo:
Mom: But why do you have to leave, kitty!
Dad: Kitty!
Today I went hiking up to the caves in the valley and saw red ants the size of lizards and lizards the size of fat gerbils. I carved things into the sandstone walls and threw rocks at glass bottles left over from the numerous kickbacks that clearly take place there. I am so cultured & sophisticated. Then I ate in the truckbed in a parking lot. I might have reached some awesome redneck and/or hippie personal record.
I really like Shelley's new boyfriend.
The only thing I wanted to say was actually these two things:
You - you arrogant little prick. I read your email over and over and it makes me so violently angry. Where have you been stalking me, that you get [false, by the way] information like "3-4 relationships"? Still read my email? Or feverishly check my livejournal? Or try and come over to Mary's uninvited in hopes that she'll tell you what I've been doing? How unbelievably insolent you are, to think that "one day" I'll be unhappy and return to you. Come to you for HELP? For COMFORT? Are you fucking kidding me? I would choose death over being in any kind of relationship with you again. Being with you, whether it be friend or lover, WAS, IS, and ALWAYS WILL BE SUICIDE. Don't entertain hopes of ever seeing me again, it disguists me.
And You - This is too far. I'll call you to discuss it, but you know what's going on already, I'm sure. It's best for you, and for me and him, if this stops. You need to stop thinking about me, because you are not respecting my choice, or my relationship. Call me or I'll call you, because there's more to be said but I just wanted to say, "no more."
Har dee har, I think besides those two, only Katie will understand what in the fuck I am talking about. Perhaps Mary, if she's checking up on me from the Motherland [which I sorely hope she will! I miss her!].
Why am I wearing a dog collar? Because I'm in love.