To Live in Die in LA:Book Two-Part Nine

[usmc75]

A long time ago…

"I bet you can’t climb as high as I can." Dean said looking down at Sam, who was still struggling at the first few branches.

Sam looked up with his eyes narrowed and lips pursed, which was Winchester for a few choice words that kids Sam and Dean’s ages weren’t allowed to say. Dean laughed as he kept climbing, the tree going on for seemingly miles.

They were in West Kentucky on the farm of one of their dad’s friends for the summer. Dean was barely ten and had just reached the height where he could really get his climb on, while Sam, small for even 6, was just at the reach where getting into the tree was a challenge. They had been together all day and to be honest- Dean was sick of him.

Sam had tagged along behind him for the last few weeks like a tiny little shadow. No matter where Dean had explored or how far he had tried to roam, there was Sam, right behind him, begging for Dean to keep up.

It was when he had found the apple trees that Dean knew he had found sanctuary. His long legs had allowed him to jump up and grab the lower branches with ease, his sneakers dangling below him as he pulled himself up slowly. His upper body strength was getting better he noted, the pull ups his dad had told him to do were making a difference. Loving the feeling of his new muscles beneath him, he reached up for the next branch and then the next, getting farther and farther away from his stupid little brother.

"Dean!" Sammy had whined, trying again and again to get to the first branch. Dean shucked as he kept going up, hoping the leaves would block him from sight below. As he broke through the crown of the tree he could see the whole countryside. The fields spread out in front of him like a pastoral buffet. The sun was just moving towards the horizon as the afternoon burned itself out. It was just about as perfect a sight that anyone could hope for.

Dean hated it.

He hated being stuck in Hicksville, population stupid, while his badass dad was out killing monsters and all that. He should be out there, Robin to his Batman, Kato to his Green Hornet, Luke to his Obi Wan. That was the only place Dean wanted to be, by his dad and away from here.

But there was always Sammy.

Stupid, sniveling Sammy who was worse than a tag along. He was an appendage.. He wasn’t just someone he could ditch, he was responsible for him.. And though that was cool for the first few years, it was becoming a fucking drag now. No time to just…be alone. Everywhere he went, here he came toddling along. He should have never taught him to walk, he thought bitterly as he heard something rustling in the tree below him.

Poking his head back he could see Sam on the first branch, holding on for dear life. He looked up at Dean with flashing eyes as he said "Haha! I got up here!"

Dean had to give the kid that, he did indeed get up there.

"So what!" Dean said reaching for the next branch "I bet you can’t climb as high as I can!" and Dean took off up the tree. He watched out of the corner of his eye, waiting for Sam to give up and stop. There was no way such a little kid could make his way all the way up here. Dean climbed another three branches and stopped, watching his little brother cut the distance between them quickly.

It wasn’t that he was tall enough to make it from branch to branch; it was that he was carefully examining each branch and judging where it met the next highest branch. He was climbing more branches than Dean had, but damned if he was making better headway than him. Sam stuck his tongue out as he made it to Dean’s level "I told you I could!"

Normally Dean would have been impressed that such a small kid could have ever made it this far, but something in his little brother's tone, something in the smugness made Dean’s blood boil. Without a word be began to climb even higher, the branches becoming thinner as they reached the top of the tree. Sam took off right behind him, doing his little calculating move to catch up and pass Dean in seconds.

Dean looked up and saw the branches ahead and said "Slow down, Sammy!" he called out "Those branches can’t support you!"

Sam just laughed as he kept climbing "Can’t support you, lardass!" he grabbed even higher "Not for the spectacular Spider-Sam!" He moved his foot up to go even higher.

When the branch in his hand gave way.

Dean watched in horror as Sam’s arms pinwheeled wildly as he fell backwards from the trunk, slapping the branches he had just climbed as he fell. Holding on for dear life, Dean called out "SAM!" as he held a hand out uselessly since he was so far away. His heart stopped as he saw Sam vanish into the lower branches and out of sight. He heard more crashing and branches flying around and then a thump.

Dean practically slid down the trunk, cutting his hands as the bark tore his skin open form the velocity. As he broke through the branches he could see Sam on his back on the ground, he wasn’t moving. He called out another strangled "Sam!" as he jumped to one of the lower branches and lowered himself down.

As he knelt beside his brother he cried out as he shook him, he didn’t look like he was moving "Sam?" he cried "Sammy, wake up!" His brother didn’t even look like he was breathing as Dean shook him again. In a more subdued voice Dean said "wake up, Sammy…I’m sorry…wake up…" He held his brother closer as he felt his entire heart breaking.

That was when Sam exploded into coughing, his arms grabbing Dean’s shoulder by instinct. "DEAN!" he called out, the fear and terror in his voice very real. Dean hugged him back as Sam held on to him like he was drowning.

"I got ya." he said holding Sam’s head "I got ya, Sammy."

Sam held on to him for several seconds before the memory of what just happened sank in. And very slowly he began to sob as the fear and adrenaline gave way to the pain. "My leg!" he called out, grabbing Dean even tighter as he moved.

Dean looked down and could see the way his foot was pointing; it was at the very least cracked. At the worst, broken ankle. In the most soothing tone he could muster he said "Ok, Sam, ok. Come on, stop crying, you need to stop crying, Sammy."

Sam buried his face in Dean’s chest as he wailed even louder; Dean slipped a hand under his knees and said "Ok Sam, Sam…Sammy look at me." Sam looked up, his face streaked with tears and dirt, he was biting his bottom lip as he listened to Dean "I need you to be a big boy now ok?" he moved his other hand to support his back "I need to pick you up, and it’s gonna hurt." Sam whimpered at just the thought of moving. Dean looked him straight in the eyes ""I need you to be strong, Sammy. Ok?"

Sam shook his head no in fear. Dean looked at him and said a bit sterner "You can do this, Sam. I know you can." he looked up at the tree "Look at how far you climbed. You think a little kid can do that?" Sam said nothing "You aren’t a little kid, Sam…" and in a very low voice Dean said "…and I shouldn’t have treated you like one." Clearing his throat Dean said "So I need you to be strong...I need you to be a Winchester and take the pain, ok?"

Sam nodded and said "I’ll try to be like you."

Dean blinked a few times and he just nodded as he lifted Sam up and made his way to the farm. He would never leave his little brother behind again.
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"SAM!" Dean called out as he knelt over his brother’s body.

Sam's face was pale as the warmth slowly left his body. Dean placed a hand on his chest, as if able to imbue life through touch alone. Trying to push his own life and willpower into his brother. "Come on, Sammy…wake up."

Faith looked on in horror as John looked away, it would have looked as if he was embarrassed by the show of emotion. But Faith could see the moisture in his eyes before he turned. The father was feeling helpless to save either of his sons. John could not bring Sam back to life and seemed to know Dean would die if his brother was gone. She turned her eyes from John's face, giving him some privacy. It was not over until it was over. She had learnt that in all her time as a Slayer. You didn't stop even when the fat lady was done singing. She crossed over to the brothers, silent as a breeze. She knelt next to Dean as he continued to talk to Sam.

Giles walked into the room and stopped at Buffy’s body.

"So that was…weird." Buffy said putting her sword away in the weapon’s locker.

Giles stood staring at the table, the very spot The Master had fallen and impaled himself hours before. If Buffy noticed the stunned look on her watcher’s face she gave no indication "I mean it was weird going to a school dance and NOT burning the place down but I meant more the whole…saving the world thing." She turned to Giles "You think that’s going to be a reoccurring theme?"

Giles saw the dust that was once the great vampire blow away under the cool California wind as he completely missed everything Buffy said.

"Giles?" Buffy came up behind him and asked "Are you ok?"

His normally implacable façade cracked as he took his glasses off "No I’m sorry, I’m afraid I’m not." His voice was strained with the first real emotion she had heard since he had walked into her life as her instructor.

In a hesitant voice she said "What’s wrong?"

He looked at her with undisguised shock "What’s wrong?" his voice got a bit rough "What’s wrong?" he shook his head "My god Buffy you died tonight and you’re asking me what’s wrong?"

At first her face had been scared of the intensity of his voice but when he admitted that she just laughed nervously "Oh that, it’s ok.. I got better."

He stared at her for a very long time without speaking. Which was, in her opinion, worse than talking in that weird tone of voice. After about a minute he sat down and said "It is not in any sense, ok."

She pulled up a chair and sat next to him. She now wished anyone had stayed after with her to clean up. Willow or Xander or even Cordeilla would be better suited to handle this. Ok that’s not true but at least then it wouldn’t be her dealing with it. She placed a hand on his "But Giles…I’m right here." she waved slightly in front of his face "Not dead. Hello?"

Giles looked up at her and smiled "Buffy that is not the point. I am your watcher, and I allowed you to die." he sighed deeply as he said "You aren’t even an adult…"

Buffy sat up straighter "I’m an adult." she protested "I’m 17." he looked at her "In fall. And I can get into R rated movies by myself, I understand 2 out of every 5 references made on The Creek on my own now and I am even thinking about someday considering maybe having sex." Giles’ eyebrows shot up in surprise

"Maybe." she amended. "The point is I am an adult."

He sounded so sad when he said "That definition alone confirms you aren’t an adult." he paused as he looked at the floor "I failed you tonight Buffy. And I am sorry."

She sat there not knowing what to say for a moment and then she grabbed his hands with hers. He looked up as she smiled and said "Bullshit." He looked shocked as she said "Complete and utter bullshit." he looked to interrupt but she talked over him "You go on about how I am the Slayer and the chosen one and all that and then say I am not an adult? If I can stake a vamp at 30 yards in the dark in heels, I am an adult. And no one failed me tonight." she paused "Except maybe my lung capacity. But if this is going to work" she made a gesture between him and her "This whole slayer/watcher thing, we need to get a few things straight."

He paused and then said dryly "Ok"

She nodded "Well for one, I may not be all book smarts like Willow, but I know enough between a bad fight and an even worse fight. Two, unlike other slayers I have a lot more going for me than just my right hand and a piece of wood." she made a face "Wow…I think I just whored up a whole slew of slayers. And three" she looked up in the eyes with a seriousness he had never seen before "If I die, it is on me. It is my choice. Not your fault. You got that?" he blinked a few times in surprise "There is no such thing as a free ride, or a free lunch, or a ride to a free lunch." she looked up thinking "Or something like that. What I mean is that this story ends one of two ways. Either I destroy all evil and settle down with Luke Perry with our 2 and a half kids…or I die." she paused "And that’s ok Giles. Well not ok I want to go and die like tomorrow, but if I die because I am saving the world or something…that’s ok. And that is not your fault." she smiled "So get it? Luke Perry or death, Either way, you didn’t fail me." he felt himself choke for a moment as she sad "You will never fail me Giles. I can feel it.."

And then she stood and stretched "Ok…major slayage crash." she said yawning "I am beat…you mind…" and said looking around at the wreckage.

He was stunned for a moment, the amount of faith she had in him and the stark lack of fear she faced about death.

So completely like a slayer.

He nodded "Of course, go. This can wait for another day."

She smiled suddenly "Another day. I like that." She turned and walked out of the library. She paused at the door and turned around "Bye Giles."

He waved once as she left "Good-bye."

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"Giles?"

He looked up and saw Willow standing there, barely. She was a bit wobbly as she tried to regain her composure. He went over and gave her a shoulder as she smiled "Sorry…kinda Bambi like in my standing."

"It’s ok." he said holding her up. He heard her gasp as she looked down

"Oh no." she began to fall as he helped her down next to Buffy. He was fine up to that point but seeing Willow so openly weep at the loss of her friend, he felt his own tears start to fall as they held on to each other in grief.

Faith looked over and saw them kneeling next to Buffy and felt a pang of regret go through her soul. She patted Dean on the back as Bobby moved next to him. She gave Bobby her place. She had to go to Giles and Willow. For what it was worth, she wanted to be there for them. She was never certain of her reception with either, but that she would risk. It was most important to stand over her fallen comrade in respect. She bowed her head as she started to move over to them. She had thought Dean was oblivious to her presence but as she took a step back he called out "Faith?" She turned and saw him looking up at her.

The look in his eyes was tearing her apart. She wanted to pull his face to her belly and rock him, just hold on like she could protect him from everything. He said nothing for a moment and then just shook his head "Nothing. Never mind." he said starting to look down and then back to her quickly "Please don’t go far."

She felt her heart break in empathy as she saw the fear and worry in Dean’s eyes. She just shook her head "I’m not going anywhere. I just need...for Buffy..." Her words were stilted, but she saw understanding in Dean's eyes. Acceptance. He spoke her shorthand. They silently communed before she turned to go to Giles and Willow.That seemed to make him feel a bit better as he went back to Sam.

She walked over as Willow straightened Buffy’s sweater out. Willow was trembling all over, her hands shaking as if her nerves were frozen fast and cold. "She…she can’t…" but she couldn’t finish. "Not again." she said softly.

Faith stood there, not sure if she was allowed to join them or not. Giles looked up and saw Faith standing there, holding the axe and he smiled slightly "It looks good on you."

Faith looked shocked for a second and then down at the axe. She held it up "This? This isn’t mine." she said feeling her own throat start to swell as she just fell to her knees. In grief, exhaustion, whatever it was, she just fell. She looked over to Buffy and said "This was always hers." she reached out and opened Buffy’s hand, trying not to notice the stiffness of the golden Slayer's fingers, placing them around the axe "I was just borrowing it."

Giles started to say something when Faith felt a jolt move through her body and then through the axe. There was a visible flash of light as Willow's eyes grew wide in shock. Faith stiffened for a moment as if being shocked by electricity, seconds later Buffy’s body did the same. Buffy’s eyes flew open in shock as she gasped loudly. Giles almost took a step back as blood began to flow from Buffy’s bullet wound.

Willow's pale hands lashed out, weaving over her friend’s form as she chanted "Rememdium seco!" Willow could see the wounds start to heal and then break open fresh as the blood kept flowing. She cast the spell again and again, to no effect. In a panic she looked over to Giles "Help me!"

He froze for a moment, not knowing what to do.

He had berated Willow once for trying to bring back the dead before. Upsetting the balance of the natural order of things was too much a risk when dealing with magic. But here Buffy was, gasping for breath, literally. He wasn’t sure he could just watch her die again.

The world fell out from under Faith as she was pulled back to that beach. She was hip deep in freezing water as Buffy stood across from her; they were both grasping the axe. Faith yelled over the incoming tide "Walk back to the shore!"

Buffy shook her head "I can’t!" the water impacted with them, almost throwing them under "I can’t make it!"

"Yes you can! If you want it bad enough, you can do this!" Faith yelled "You're not alone, B. I’ll help you. Just walk back with me!"

Faith took a step back; she felt the whole of the ocean claw at her, trying to pull her in. If this was an hour before- she would have thought there was no way she could have fought against that pull. She would have said it was just too powerful, and she was all alone. She would have feared the undertow and blanked on all the reasons she could not lose to it.

She knew better now.

"Help her out!" Faith called out, feeling the axe sing for a moment. Buffy looked in confusion but before she could say anything hands came out from the water and grabbed her waist.

Kendra stood up from the water and placed her hands on Buffy’s hip. Buffy looked in shock for a second and then she felt the dead slayer start to push her forward. Faith pulled again as another set of hands emerged from the waves. One by one they slayers stood up, pushing Buffy towards the shore. But Faith knew, it was her, it was her half steps back to the sand that were bringing Buffy back. There was something passing between the two of them, a vitality that was moving from Faith into Buffy through the axe. She could feel it was part of her life passing away, part of her own soul she was giving up.

She gritted her teeth and pulled harder.

Step by step they walked back, the water receding inch by inch from their legs. Every single step was sheer torture.

Giles looked down and knew, he had been wrong. There was no way he could sit here and watch her die. Not like this. He placed his hands on Willow’s shoulders as he passed the coven’s power into her. The witch’s eyes flared white as she pulsed power into Buffy’s body.. The wound healed instantly, various cuts and bruises all over her body began to reverse themselves.

Faith almost stumbled as Buffy took a step forward towards her. Faith felt her lose her footing as the axe slipped from her hands. As she fell onto the wet sand she felt the water rush up her back and instantly began to pull her in. She panicked for a brief second; her only thought was she had told Dean she wasn’t going anywhere. She looked up and felt Buffy’s hand grab her wrist. Buffy looked down at her and grinned "Going somewhere?"

Kicking back, Faith was able to drag herself back to the beach, both of them panting with exhaustion. Both of them laid back on the sand, the urge to just close their eyes and sleep was overwhelming.

"I still hate you." Buffy said with a smile in her voice.

"Back at you sister." Faith said smiling herself. Deciding to be nice, she added, "But you don't suck all the time."

Once she felt some strength return to her body, Faith sat up slowly and saw Buffy sitting next to her. She handed Faith the axe "Here."

"It’s not mine." Faith said, unwilling to even touch the thing.

Buffy smiled at her with genuine affection "Yes. It is."

Faith gingerly took the axe as there was a flash of light around both of them.

They opened their eyes as one.

Faith pulled back, the axe in her hand as she fought the urge to pass out completely. She looked over and saw Buffy laying down, barely moving.

Faith saw Giles smiling down at Buffy as the blond asked confusedly "Am I late for class?"

Giles smiled as a tear rolled down his cheek "No, I think you can skip this one." She nodded and closed her eyes to rest.

"Help him!"

Faith looked over and saw Dean looking at Willow "Please! You have to help him!"

Willow face grew grim as she bit her bottom lip. "Dean I…" she hesitated "…I can’t heal him. It’s not possible."

Faith thought she would never see Dean cry. But here he was, looking at Willow "Try!" and in a very weak voice "Try?"

Willow hesitated, looking at Sam Winchester like he was a creature of the night. Faith thought that might be exactly what he was to Willow. But inwardly, Faith didn't think Willow needed to be throwing those stones. Glass houses and all. Willow shook her head and saw Dean’s face crack with emotion. He out his head down on Sam’s chest, pleading to whoever would listen.

"Giles" Faith said moving to the Watcher "I have an idea." she said taking him aside and talking to him for a few moments. She did not let go as she told him he could do this. That he was fucking well going to do this. Faith kept it minimal, but if ever a Slayer had mixed threatening with pleading, she did. Dean was not going to lose Sam. Not today. Not when there was a way. Giles pulled back and looked at her like she was crazy for a moment. But she just nodded and looked back to Sam.

"You’re kidding." he said, face white as a sheet.

"What do we have to lose?" she said, trying to implore him silently.

Giles walked over and knelt down next to Dean. Placing a hand on Dean’s back he pulled him back "May I examine him?"

Dean looked to him for a second and then to Faith, who nodded. He leaned back, never getting out of arm’s reach of his brother. Giles passed a hand over Sam’s long form and gasped. He froze as Faith said more than asked "It’s true, right?"

Giles looked at her and nodded. Closing his eyes he began to chant "Ego advoco procul hoc corpus Sam Winchester!" there was a summoning of power as the room grew still. In a louder voice Giles chanted "Ego advoco procul hoc corpus Sam Winchester!" the lights began to flicker as the building began to shake around them. Willow looked around for a second and then called out "Everyone get down!"

Faith helped John and Bobby down as Willow dropped quickly. There was an explosion as all the windows on the floor shattered inward. A rush of wind moving from all directions towards them. Giles, cut and bleeding called out again over the din "Ego advoco procul hoc corpus Sam Winchester!!" There was the sound of a sonic boom as Sam’s form rose off the carpet. Lights began to dance around him as he floated and twitched in midair. Giles’ hands flashed with power as he called out one last time "Ego advoco procul hoc corpus Sam Winchester!!"

The silence was deafening as the wind, the lights, everything vanished. Leaving everyone in the room stunned by the sudden absence of everything. And then there was the sound of something screaming in the distance in a guttural voice that became quickly distant. Only Giles could hear Azazel screaming that next time, he would keep the soul.

When the lights came back on, Sam was lying on the ground blinking up in confusion. Nobody moved for a second and then Dean saw his brother moving. "SAM!" he called out, rushing forward and grabbing his brother tightly. Sam sat there, letting Dean grab him without protest but not understanding anything.

In a weak voice he asked "Dean?" Dean pulled back and grabbed Sam’s face in both hands.

"Sammy!" he choked "You look…" Dean paused "…like crap."

Sam pushed Dean’s hands away "Screw you." he said weakly as he began to topple over. Dean reached out and steadied him.

"Ok, ok" he said making sure Sam was ok "You can’t go falling over without yelling timber." he said gripping Sam by the shoulder tightly "We’d be responsible for anyone crushed beneath you."

Faith grinned as she walked over and sat next to Dean. He looked back at her and smiled "Thank you." he said with a deep voice "Thank you for…"

She shushed him with a kiss, knowing if he knew the truth, he wouldn’t thank her at all.

John, who had watched the entire thing in shock slowly walked over to Giles and stood behind him "How did you do that?" he asked in whisper.

Giles looked behind at the man and sighed "I believe we need to talk about Sam." he said looking back, watching Dean fawn over his brother like an overprotective hen and Sam try half heartedly to fend him off.

"Not now." Giles said "But we will need to talk about him."

John sighed, afraid of what he already knew.

But for now he just smiled and walked over to his sons. Happy as hell that for the moment, they were all together and alright.

Previously on To Live in Die in L.A.
Prelude// Part One// Part Two/ Part Three/ Part Four/ Part Five/ Part Six/ Part Seven/ Part Eight/ Part Nine/ Part Ten