She never mentions the word addiction in certain company.

[usedtothepain]

and apparently neither do I.

I'm a fool.

This year I've been offered all the best things in life... love, contentment, education, friends, 2nd chances, a future...

and I've fucked each and everyone of them into oblivion or so it seems.

Once again I find there is a overwhelmingly huge chance I'm getting thrown in jail in the next 2 weeks.

I hate myself so much cause I'm just a fucking idiot.

I'm weak... some of you know that I've been back into some of my darker old ways lately.
I'm paying for it all over again.

I"m sorry to everyone I've been a fucking tool to.
honestly.

I wish I could start my life over from 6th grade.

That's now how it works though...
so i'm here alone waiting for the storm to pass so I can dig through this wreckage I call my life.