[Fic] RYUTARO
Title: RYUTARO
Author: urufu
Characters: Morimoto Ryutaro, the rest of HSJ, and his family
Genre: Non-romance, Angst, Friendship
Rating: PG
Summary: Ryutaro was showing some symptoms that made everyone worried. If they asked him, he would keep telling them that he was okay and would hide things from them. But then they finally found out what happened to him...
Notes: Why do I love making ANGST for birthday fics...? *facepalms* Anyway, happy belated birthday for the happy hamster~! ♥ This is kinda long, but I’ll be happy if you can read this until the very end^^
It was 6th April, 2015. Right at his 20th birthday. Nine members of JUMP were sitting in a circle. On the center of the table, there was a simple strawberry cake brought by Yamada.
“Today he turns to be an adult...” Takaki spoke out first.
“Our Ryutaro is not a kid anymore...” Inoo trailed off.
Everybody nodded their heads.
“This could be a great celebration... if he was with us right now...” Chinen smiled bitterly.
“Yeah... But too bad that he’s now-” Yabu didn’t finish his sentence.
They grew silent, reflecting to the scenes some years ago...
Flashback (4 years ago)
“I told you to buy Chocolate Pocky, not Strawberry Pocky! Mou, Ryutaro...”
“I’m sorry, Dai-chan... I got confused to choose... And my phone was died so I couldn’t ask you...”
“Well, Pocky is Pocky. The flavor is not a problem. Oi Ryutaro, hand me that box of Strawberry Pocky, please.”
“OI! Just because it’s Strawberry doesn’t mean it becomes yours!” Daiki whacked Yamada’s head hard.
Yamada whined in pain, earning laughter from his other bandmates.
Ryutaro plopped himself down on the sofa, sighing.
“Tired?” Keito asked kindly.
Ryutaro shook his head. “I’m just wondering why recently I often forget things. A week ago my mom asked me to water her flowers, but what I did was cutting the grass on her garden. And just sometime ago at school when I was having an exam, I couldn’t remember some equations that I’ve mastered for a long time so the exam didn’t go well...”
“Really? Are you an old man or something?” Ryutaro pouted by Hikaru’s comment.
-------------------
One afternoon, Ryutaro was accompanying Chinen to buy something for his sister’s birthday. They walked through streets, which had many kinds of shops on both sides.
It wasn’t really crowded. Not many people was around.
Suddenly a man coincidentally hit Ryutaro’s shoulder while he was half-running, splashing his coffee on Ryutaro’s face and coat.
“Ouch!” Ryutaro screamed when the hot coffee touched his skin.
“Ah!! I’m sorry!!” the man apologized.
Ryutaro stared at his brown-stained coat, frowning his eyebrows.
“Where the hell were you looking at??”
Chinen’s eyes widened. He couldn’t believe Ryutaro snapped at the man. He was usually reserved and calm.
“I didn’t do it on purpose-“
“Couldn’t you use your eyes properly?? At least don’t run around with a hot coffee on your hand!”
“Ryutaro...”
“It’s street, young boy. Something like this often happen. Why are you so pissed?” the man arched his eyebrows.
Ryutaro was ready to reply back, but he was prevented by Chinen.
“Sorry, Sir. I don’t know what’s got into him now but he usually is very kind. Uhm, sorry we got to go,” he dragged Ryutaro away from the man.
“Oi! What’s wrong with you??” Chinen asked after they had walked away for a few minutes. “You didn’t have to yell like that! He didn’t do it on purpose!”
“I know, I know! Geez...”
“Then, why?”
“I couldn’t control my anger... It just... exploded.”
“At that time, I was like seeing a different you...”
“Don’t mind it! Look, I’m sorry, okay? Shall we continue the shopping?”
Ryutaro smiled, walking away from Chinen who had a confusion on his face.
-------------------
At that time, there was only Yabu and Hikaru in their dressing room. They were discussing about the next concert theme while the others were away, doing their own stuffs.
“Ne, Hikaru. Don’t you feel something strange with Ryutaro?” after some discussions, Yabu reached that topic.
“Yeah... He’s acting weird... He often got distracted while we were practicing our dances. You know, he forgot steps and so on. Something happens with him?”
“That’s not the only thing. I think he’s... sick. I don’t know. He got skinnier and paler. It’s like I don’t feel any spirit from him. That’s unusual for someone like Ryutaro.”
“But he doesn’t want to tell his problem with us. Well, I hope he’ll be okay...”
Just when they were going to continue the discussion, someone entered that room.
“Ah, Shintaro!”
“Konnichiwa, Yabu-kun, Hikaru-kun. Um, where’s Ryu?”
“I don’t know. Earlier he was with Keito and Yamada. Maybe they went for buy drinks.”
“Oh...”
“Do you want to give something to your brother?” Yabu pointed a bento in Shintaro’s grip.
“Yes, my mom forgot to give this to him before he left.”
“Just leave it on that table. I don’t think he’ll come back soon,” Hikaru suggested.
“I see...” Shintaro put the bento on the table. “Then, I’ll take my leave.”
“Wait!” suddenly, Hikaru stopped him.
“What are you doing?” Yabu wondered, lifting his eyebrows.
“Don’t you think this is our chance?” Hikaru whispered to the skinny guy. “We can ask about Ryutaro to his bro!”
“Ah... You’re right.”
“What is it, Hikaru-kun?” Shintaro turned around.
“Take a seat here first,” Hikaru patted a spot between him and Yabu on the sofa.
Shintaro obliged.
“So,” Hikaru started, “We want to ask some questions to you.”
“About?”
“Your brother.”
Shintaro’s smile disappeared.
“Is he acting weird at home? Because he is, with us. And we think he’s not feeling well... Is he sick? Why didn’t he tell-Shin-chan?” Yabu stopped when he saw Shintaro turned his head down.
“He’s fine,” was the only answer that came out from his mouth.
“Are you sure?”
“He’s reeally fine. Even this morning we fought, so he’s fine. He’s-“ Shintaro suddenly sobbed. He prevented himself from breaking by holding his own breath.
“Oi, Shintaro! What’s wrong??” Yabu and Hikaru grew worried about that young boy.
“W-Why am I crying...? Hahaha... No, nothing happened, really...” he wiped the tears on his eyes.
Yabu and Hikaru were just silent. They didn’t want to add any questions to him, because they knew they would only got the same answer.
“Can I leave now? My friends are waiting for me...”
“O-Oh, sure. Thanks for taking sometime to talk to us...” Yabu said.
Shintaro nodded, trying to smile.
“My nii-chan... He indeed is having his own issues... But I’m sure he’s gonna be okay.”
“Sou ka? Then, he’s gonna be okay...” Hikaru smiled back.
Shintaro bowed and then exited the room.
Not long after that, Ryutaro came in alone.
“Ryutaro! Where are the others?”
He just shrugged. “Keito and Yama-chan are going to the toilet, but I don’t know about the others.”
“By the way, Shintaro came here bringing your bento,” Yabu pointed to the table.
“Yo, thanks. I just met him in the hallway. Hey, did something happen before?”
“Why?” Hikaru asked.
“Because his eyes were red, like he’s been crying or something.”
“Oh... We didn’t know either...”
“Ne... Did he say something about me?”
Yabu and Hikaru peeked at each other.
“Not really...”
“That’s good,” Ryutaro sighed in relieved.
-------------------
The members were practicing their new dance moves in the rehearsal room. Everybody was excited. But one boy was different from the others.
“Morimoto!! You’re way too stiff!”
“Swing you arms properly, oi!”
“I told you to keep up with the others! Geez, Morimoto!”
Their dance instructor kept yelling at Ryutaro. He didn’t go well with the practice.
“Ryutaro, take a rest,” Keito suggested when they had a break time.
“But I still can’t do this move,” Ryutaro said as he was still practicing the dance.
“Me too. But don’t rush, will you? You look very exhausted.”
Ryutaro ignored Keito and kept practicing.
The other members looked at each other.
“I’m worrying about him,” Inoo stated.
“He looks like going to collapse soon...” Takaki said as he drank from his own bottle.
Takaki was right. Not long after that, Ryutaro fell down on the floor.
“Ryutaro!!” Everybody was rushing to his side.
“I’m okay...” he got up, grinning. “I was tripped, that’s all.”
“Ryutaro, enough. Go to our room now. Your practice ends here.”
“But-“
“I said enough. I’ll talk to Instructor-san later,” Yabu insisted.
Ryutaro sighed and obliged his unofficial leader of the group.
They were gonna start the practice again. Yuto peeked to Ryutaro who was walking to the door. He coincidentally saw Ryutaro wincing in pain while holding his own head.
-------------------
Yuto asked their instructor’s permission and went to JUMP’s dressing room. He said he left something in that room and was gonna take it. Well, actually he just wanted to check on Ryutaro. He was worried, having seen Ryutaro on that state right before he left their rehearsal room.
When he entered the room, he saw Ryutaro sitting on the sofa.
“Oh, hi Ryutaro.”
Ryutaro seemed surprised with Yuto’s presence.
“Yuto-kun? What are you doing here?”
“I was just... gonna take something,” he lied.
“Oh.”
Yuto walked to his bag, pretending to take out his phone.
He was relieved. Ryutaro seemed okay. Maybe he was just need some rest.
“After you get some rest, come back to rehearsal room, okay? We need to synchronize our dance-Ryutaro!!”
Yuto was shock and panic when suddenly Ryutaro vomited. He spurted hard all his stomach content, like he couldn’t control it.
“Ryutaro!! Oh my God, what happen with you??”
He kept vomiting and vomiting, even when there was nothing to be spurted anymore.
“I-I’ll call someone!” Yuto raised up and was ready to exit the room, but then Ryutaro pulled his leg and prevented him from going.
“Noo! I can manage this! I-I’ll clean these all up! Please, Yuto-kun! Don’t call anyone!”
“But-!”
“I BEG YOU!!!” a drop of tears rolling on his cheek.
Yuto was hesitant at first, but after seeing Ryutaro’s tears he gave up. He crouched down to help Ryutaro.
“Ryutaro... W-What... What happened to you...? Are you sick...?”
“I-I just ate expired food this morning so I didn’t feel well. That’s all.”
“No way. It was strange, because a normal food poisoning won’t result that way of vomiting like you did. It was like... projectile. You spurted it all...”
Ryutaro didn’t answer and instead cleaned his mess on the floor.
“Oi, Ryutaro. Answer me. I know you have some kind of illness.”
“You’re noisy! There’s nothing happened to me- Uugh!!“ Ryutaro winced and held his head tightly.
“Ryutaro!!”
“Okay, okay! I’ll tell you!” he gave up and stared at Yuto’s worried eyes. “I’m having a brain cancer.”
Yuto stared back at him, looking all disbelief.
“...brain...cancer?”
Ryutaro nodded weakly.
“Ryutaro... Oh, God...”
Yuto didn’t know what he should do right then, so he just stared at the ill boy.
“Why didn’t you... tell the others?”
“Are you kidding? No way I’m gonna let you all worried.”
“But... it’s cancer we’re talking about-“
“Listen, I’ll be fine. It’s just a cancer. It can be cured. Don’t be scared, Yuto-kun.”
Ryutaro patted Yuto’s back, grinning like there was nothing to worry about.
“Don’t tell anyone, okay? Only my family and you who know about this.”
Ryutaro got back to clean the floor, completely ignoring Yuto’s anxious face.
-------------------
Yuto really wanted to tell his bandmates about Ryutaro’s illness. Brain cancer. Ryutaro shouldn’t have wondered around like that. He should have been in the hospital and took the medication. But being a hard-headed boy he was, Ryutaro didn’t want to hear all Yuto’s complaints.
Everyone was gathered in their dressing room, ready to discuss something. Ryutaro was called by the staff so he was the one who didn’t attend the meeting. Yuto thought that might be his chance to tell the others.
But just right before he opened his mouth, Shintaro knocked the door and entered the room.
“Shintaro, you come again!” Hikaru grinned.
“What is it, Shin-chan? Looking for your brother?” Daiki asked.
Shintaro shook his head.
“Minna-san, can I talk with you? I want to request something...”
“Request?” everyone wondered. They all exchanged looks at each other.
“Could you guys... stop my brother from continuing the concert?”
“Eh? You want him not to attend our concert? Why?” Yabu lifted his eyebrows.
“I can’t tell you, but... I beg you, please...! Don’t let him continue! Please, do everything to stop him!” Shintaro bowed deeply.
“Shintaro, we don’t understand. We need some reasons for your request. You see, Ryutaro is important in our concert,” Yamada stated firmly.
Shintaro stood back, biting his own lips.
“I... don’t wanna lose him...”
“Lose him? Listen, it’s not like he will disappear if he participates in the con-“
“HE WILL DIE IF HE STILL CONTINUES!!! I DON’T WANT THAT HAPPEN!!” Shintaro screamed, cutting Chinen’s comment. “PLEASE, I’M SO SCARED!!”
“Oi, calm down... We don’t know anything, Shintaro... Could you tell us what exactly is happening with him?”
“I said I can’t-“
“He’s having a brain cancer.”
Their eyes were all fixed to the tall skinny guy.
“Minna, I’m sorry I didn’t tell you guys earlier... Actually... Ryutaro is having a brain cancer...” Yuto replied with his shaky voice.
“N-No... No way... This is a joke right-?”
”Why would I joke in this state of condition, Yama-chan?”
“Then why didn’t you tell us??”
“He prevented me! And I just couldn’t refuse his request...” Yuto sighed in desperation.
“Ryutaro... Brain cancer...?” Takaki face palmed. “What kind of disaster we’re in now?”
“Cancer... Never in my mind I thought about one of my bandmates having that disease...” Keito commented with hoarse tone.
“So he has had the symptoms for all this time... So that’s why he often forgot things, was easy to be angered, and was hard to memorize the dance moves?” Chinen sighed to himself.
“Minna, listen. Shintaro is right. After we know about Ryutaro’s condition, we mustn’t let Ryutaro do the concert,” Yabu, being a mature leader he was, decided not to complaint and brought the others together again.
Everybody agreed immediately. Shintaro smiled brightly, bowing again to the members of JUMP.
“Thank you very much! I’m-I’m so thankful that you all understand...” he wiped the tears that began forming on his eyes.
Suddenly, Ryutaro entered the room, surprising all the people in there.
“R-Ryutaro?”
“What? Why are you guys staring at me with those eyes? Oi, Shintaro. What are you doing here?”
“Ryutaro... we know it...”
“Know what?”
“About your illness.”
Ryutaro freeze. And then he shot a glare to his young brother.
“You told them!!”
“No! I was the one who told them!” Yuto stood up, eyes fixing at Ryutaro’s.
“Y-Yuto-kun? Why...? I told you not to-“
“Seriously, Morimoto. Don’t you think about your own condition? It’s a cancer! And it even affected your brain! What the hell are you doing here??” Inoo scolded him, being his unusual self.
“I...” Ryutaro bit his own lips. “I want to do this concert.”
“No, you’re not going to do it. You must have been doing your medication right now. I’ll tell Manager-san about this,” Yabu took out his cellphone, but then Ryutaro grabbed it from Yabu’s hand.
“No! Please, at least let me do this concert!”
“Are you being selfish, Ryutaro?”
“YES! I’m selfish!” he snapped to Chinen. “Let me tell you all. I’m going to die. Taking the medication or not, there won’t be any different. So at least... I want to do this last thing to our fans...”
“Ryutaro! Don’t say something like that!” Yuto yelled.
“I’m dead serious. Doctors said I only have two weeks left. That’s short, huh? We’ll held our concert in two weeks too, so... That is the last thing I want to do before I die...”
Everyone in that room held their own breath, couldn’t believe what he had just said.
“Please let me do this... I beg you all!!” Ryutaro bowed to everyone.
“Ryu...” Shintaro couldn’t hold his tears anymore.
“Oh, come on, brother. Don’t cry...” he made his way to Shintaro and hugged him. “I’m sorry to make you worried, okay? I’m really such a selfish brother for you, but... This is my own decision. I’ve told Mama, Papa, and Natsune. They were finally agreed with me. You too, please support me?”
“You don’t know how Mama cried all nights, how Papa became very quiet, and how Natsune lost her cheerfulness because of thinking about you!!”
“I know, Shin. I know. I’ve been a burden for all of you, my most important persons in my life, so I’m really sorry...”
Shintaro continued crying in Ryutaro’s embrace. His bandmates just looked at them sorrowfully. They couldn’t imagine if Ryutaro was really going to leave... forever...
-------------------
Ryutaro was trying his best to look fine in front of his bandmates and his fans. Yes, they were finally having the concert. No one knew about Ryutaro’s illness beside his bandmates so they all tried to act just normal. Ryutaro didn’t know it because his bandmates were all smiling, but actually they were crying inside. His condition didn’t get any better. Two weeks were almost passed since his confession. The symptoms got worse, with him vomiting and having tremors for many times. Still, they supported him, helping him to fulfill his last wish.
The concert was perfect. There were few mistakes by they could handle it immediately. Everyone was relieved the concert turned very well, despite of Ryutaro’s condition. He was amazingly be able to keep up and didn’t show his illness at all through the concert. He looked like enjoying himself. Fans made him feel like that, he stated.
“Thank you, minna~!”
“Arigatou~! Thanks for coming!”
“We love you!”
After they shouted the gratitude at the end of the encore, the concert ended.
“Woooh! I’m glad we managed it!”
“There are so many people came! Amazing, ne?”
“I hope we can make a good concert again next season!”
They chatted happily in their backstage room. Everyone was beaming. They almost forgot about Ryutaro...
“Oi, Ryutaro!” Daiki called the boy sitting on the sofa. “Don’t sleep! We’ll have a celebration!”
Ryutaro was sitting there, eyes closed for quiet a long time after the concert ended.
“Let him rest, Dai-chan. He must be really tired. It must have been tough practicing non-stop with his physical condition...” Keito said.
“Ne, Ryu-chan. Something I can do for you? Maybe I can massage you?” Chinen sat beside him and kindly placed his hands on Ryutaro’s shoulders to began massaging him.
Ryutaro didn’t replied. Instead, his body fell to the side.
“Ryu...chan?”
Chinen panicked, especially after he saw Ryutaro’s pale lips.
“Minna! Ryutaro is... Ryutaro...!”
They all rushed to Ryutaro’s side.
“Ryutaro! Wake up! Y-You can’t be serious, dying after our concert!” Yamada shouted at his ears, but he earned nothing. Ryutaro didn’t wake up.
“Call the staffs! A-And call his family, too! Somebody!” Yabu ordered anyone who was not in panic and was capable to do something in that state.
Ryutaro was rushed to the hospital immediately. He was in comma. His body couldn’t take it anymore.
His mother cried and cried until she fainted in her husband’s embrace. Natsune also couldn’t stop crying in Shintaro’s arms. The rest of JUMP couldn’t do anything anymore. They all just prayed for Ryutaro...
He would leave them. But even if he would leave them, he would do that in peace because his last wish had been fulfilled. They believed that.
Doctors came out from the ICU room. They were ready to tell their patient’s family and friends about the news...
End of flashback
“Oi, minna,” Yabu looked at all his bandmates who already had teary eyes. “Don’t be sad anymore...”
“I really wish he would still be here... Years without him was painful...”
“Now now, why don’t we cut the cake? Those strawberries are hunting me!” Yamada patted Yuto’s shoulder.
“He’s right. There is nothing to be worried. Now let’s eat the cake~! Yama-chan had spared some time between his super-idol schedule to just buy this!”
“Oi, Dai-chan! Could you just cut the “super-idol” part??” everyone laughed at those nearly twins best friends.
They sang ‘Happy Birthday to Ryutaro’ and began to cut the cake after Yamada scolding Inoo about stealing his strawberries.
“Itadakima~su!”
“Are you guys going to eat that without waiting for the birthday guy?”
Shocked, they turned their heads to the door.
“Yo.”
“RYUTARO??”
“Oi, at least say “Okaeri~” to me...”
“RYUTAROOOO!!!” nine guys ran to the victim and gave him huge embraces. “You’re back!!”
They laughed (some were having tears on their eyes) and dragged him to the cake.
“How are you now?
“Have you finished your medication?”
“Have you healed? Have the cancer disappeared?”
They all poured him with questions.
“Oi oi, let me eat the cake first, will ya?” Ryutaro grinned, taking a plate-Yamada’s plate and ate the content of it.
“That’s my plate!! It has the biggest strawberries in it! Darn, give it back, Hamster!”
“Shut up, Pig! This is mine now!”
They all laughed at the hamster and the little pig’s antic.
Ryutaro came back. He didn’t leave them. Doctors had found a miracle in him, and they said Ryutaro could still be healed. So he took a hiatus from his band’s activity and took a medication in US. And after 4 years of his leaving, finally he came back. Bringing a new hope for his family, his bandmates, his fans, his life.
“Ryutaro, I’m glad you’re back...” Yuto wrapped his arm around Ryutaro’s shoulder.
“You know, I’m more glad than you...” Ryutaro grinned happily.
“Saying that you only had two weeks left... Geez, you had made us worried at that time!” Hikaru hit Ryutaro’s head.
“Ouch! It still hurts from the surgery!!”
“O-Oh, I’m sorry!!”
Ryutaro stuck his tongue to Hikaru. “Just kidding.”
“Why you-!” Hikaru choked him playfully.
“JUMP is not JUMP if one of us is not here.”
“Yeap!” they agreed with Yabu’s statement.
“Don’t leave us again, okay? We had missed our dear giant baby with us,” Yamada grinned while munching his new cake.
“I promise. From now on, I’ll always be your giant baby. Forever.”
With Ryutaro’s come back, JUMP was be able to smile their true smile again.
~Owari~
Honestly, I know nothing about brain cancer. If there are mistakes, I’m really really sorry orz
It doesn’t end sad, I’m soo relieved! XD I thought of killing him, but I’ve killed him in my fics for few times before so... XDD
Thanks for reading this long fic! ^0^