Our circles dont mix
Today was my grandmas memorial service. It went fine, actually it went better than I thought that it would, which made it great. I met some family that I didn't know I had. It was weird because they had known me when I was about 3 and then my mom lost touch for one reason or another and to see these people today was weird. They were all excited to see me and told me how much they loved me and they had missed me. How they couldn't believe that I was so grown up. I don't remember these people and to me it was like meeting strangers for the first time and getting a welcome home reception.
I learned alot about my family today. I confirmed lessons that I had learned before. My actual aunts and Uncles tried to avoid me as much as possible, which I didn't mind they aren't people I want to have around me. They are losers. I wish that we could be close. I saw how my cousin Tiffany was so comfortable and how loving they were to her and I did get jealous. Ive always wanted a big family and to have family members other than my parents and sisters but I don't.
I was surprised about my cousin Tiffany though, I thought that we would be on the same terms that we had been on since the last time we had seen eachother (which was a few years ago) but she isn't in my circle and Im not in hers and unfortunetly our circles don't mix anymore. She is following our aunts and uncles path and Im sorry for that. Because of that too she doesn't want to be around me. Which I can understand because I don't want to be around the kind of shit she is into either (The drug abuse and the drinking).
I was happy to see that not all my relatives were all fucked up. Great Aunt geenie and vicky both were amazing! They are people that can mix with my circle.
We go home tomorrow and Im glad. This bed that Im on really hurts and it gets really cold up here. It is sooooo beautiful up here and its a very small town, The Town next to us only has 150 people living in it. I would like to raise a family here. I dont think Jeff would want to though lol
Over all it was nice to learn more about where I come from
I learned alot about my family today. I confirmed lessons that I had learned before. My actual aunts and Uncles tried to avoid me as much as possible, which I didn't mind they aren't people I want to have around me. They are losers. I wish that we could be close. I saw how my cousin Tiffany was so comfortable and how loving they were to her and I did get jealous. Ive always wanted a big family and to have family members other than my parents and sisters but I don't.
I was surprised about my cousin Tiffany though, I thought that we would be on the same terms that we had been on since the last time we had seen eachother (which was a few years ago) but she isn't in my circle and Im not in hers and unfortunetly our circles don't mix anymore. She is following our aunts and uncles path and Im sorry for that. Because of that too she doesn't want to be around me. Which I can understand because I don't want to be around the kind of shit she is into either (The drug abuse and the drinking).
I was happy to see that not all my relatives were all fucked up. Great Aunt geenie and vicky both were amazing! They are people that can mix with my circle.
We go home tomorrow and Im glad. This bed that Im on really hurts and it gets really cold up here. It is sooooo beautiful up here and its a very small town, The Town next to us only has 150 people living in it. I would like to raise a family here. I dont think Jeff would want to though lol
Over all it was nice to learn more about where I come from