(no subject)
woow.
just wow.
summer skool starts either july 7th or 9th? i dunno yet.
im just dreading it, like ir eally did try this year.
i had a tutor ALL this year. and i sitll failed. but im not goin 2 summer skool 4 that, ima get another tutor and take it in january,
buuuuuuuut math ugh. i was passing all year. until i failed horibly on my exam bringing my whole math average 2 failing. so yay me.
summer skool 4 math
ANNND us!
i fuckign passed the year in us wit at 80!!!!
but iwgot so damn sick the day of i couldnt concentrate. i just couldnt.
so now summer skool 4 math and us.
annd with what money????
its just too much....
annd now ihave 2 call all my babysitiing pple and cancel my summer jobs wit them
thats gonna b a fun phone call.
not=/
skool 8am until 1 ish
every week
all summer
not fucking fun.
im just not lookin 4ward 2 it.
im also gonna b broke, cause i cant work
and im gonna have 2 b in buffalo all summer
ugh ive been so depressed.
ive been shutting every1 out.
its bad
i been so nervous this time 4 exams ive been having my nervous attacks where i sit in bed shaking so hard
i been crying
i been sick
nerves have been so bad
i lost 7 pounds just from bein so stressed and loss of apetite cause i been so sick about exams
iw as eating lunch wit my mom when i got the math phone call and i started crying and couldnt eat and she felt so bad 4 me she was crying and that just made me feel even worse.
like she was sitting there crying and telling me how bad she feels 4 me and how hard she knows i tried.
ugh it just really aggrivates me
i really wish i was smarter,
like thats what would make me happy
it really really would
i wana b happy bout sumthing.
anyway.
on a brighter note.
kenny gave me his necklace the other day=] it was cute.
and 2day he surprised me and stopped over 4 5 min 2 c me b4 i leave sunday.
i dunno i thought it was cute.
he really is cute.
obv im not all like OMG I LVOE HIM. fuck thaaat. haha but its nice,
hes really nice.
he calls me alll the time. we talk alotttttttt alot and were hanging out and its just cute.
like i dunno its hard 2 describe.
my sister likes him so much and so does laura. its funny
its like they like him mroe then i do. lol jk
but id unno its cute=]
im not complaining right now wit it.
i miss brenden. he called me yesterday and it was right after i had been cryin about skool and i heard his voice and i started crying 2 him like it was just all the stress. i told him i got a phonecall 4 math n id idnt know anythign else at the time, and i told him i was getting sick over everything. and he felt so bad he was like well emily u r 1 of the smartest girls i know, and u try harder then any1 and i dunno i always go to him 4 skool support cause hes the only1 who really truly understands. and he just made me feel better but i miss him so much.
hes coming here at the end of the summer 4 like 2 weeks tho
it just sucks hes not here.,
he left the morning b4 my 1st exam and i went 2 skool crying=[
he took me out 2 dinner liek amonth ago and i felt so close 2 him. like we had a really good convo, he was just telling me how he sees me being successful in life, and whatever i do will b the right decision n he said its okay 2 occasionally smoke or drink 2 have a funt ime but also let me know i dont need it, and he said it would hurt him 2 c me become bad and using other drugs cause it just wouldnt b good. and id unno we had a really good time.
it was nice
and hes gone. i dunno
i miss my brother
i feel so lost
ive been so sick lately. i cant eat. like emotionally sick. i just cant eat. i had a granolla bar 2day
and a yogurt yesterday
i just feel so emotionally fucked up
nothing is okay right now.
i want 2 b okay i want to b happy. i want 2 b some1 else and somewhere else.
i dont like who i am
i have been so depressed, and a sign of depression is frustration
and i have been super frustrated lately
ive been spazzing and bitching lately
everything is makine me angry, mad, frustrated, upset,
i dunno
i feel so angry at the world
just wow.
summer skool starts either july 7th or 9th? i dunno yet.
im just dreading it, like ir eally did try this year.
i had a tutor ALL this year. and i sitll failed. but im not goin 2 summer skool 4 that, ima get another tutor and take it in january,
buuuuuuuut math ugh. i was passing all year. until i failed horibly on my exam bringing my whole math average 2 failing. so yay me.
summer skool 4 math
ANNND us!
i fuckign passed the year in us wit at 80!!!!
but iwgot so damn sick the day of i couldnt concentrate. i just couldnt.
so now summer skool 4 math and us.
annd with what money????
its just too much....
annd now ihave 2 call all my babysitiing pple and cancel my summer jobs wit them
thats gonna b a fun phone call.
not=/
skool 8am until 1 ish
every week
all summer
not fucking fun.
im just not lookin 4ward 2 it.
im also gonna b broke, cause i cant work
and im gonna have 2 b in buffalo all summer
ugh ive been so depressed.
ive been shutting every1 out.
its bad
i been so nervous this time 4 exams ive been having my nervous attacks where i sit in bed shaking so hard
i been crying
i been sick
nerves have been so bad
i lost 7 pounds just from bein so stressed and loss of apetite cause i been so sick about exams
iw as eating lunch wit my mom when i got the math phone call and i started crying and couldnt eat and she felt so bad 4 me she was crying and that just made me feel even worse.
like she was sitting there crying and telling me how bad she feels 4 me and how hard she knows i tried.
ugh it just really aggrivates me
i really wish i was smarter,
like thats what would make me happy
it really really would
i wana b happy bout sumthing.
anyway.
on a brighter note.
kenny gave me his necklace the other day=] it was cute.
and 2day he surprised me and stopped over 4 5 min 2 c me b4 i leave sunday.
i dunno i thought it was cute.
he really is cute.
obv im not all like OMG I LVOE HIM. fuck thaaat. haha but its nice,
hes really nice.
he calls me alll the time. we talk alotttttttt alot and were hanging out and its just cute.
like i dunno its hard 2 describe.
my sister likes him so much and so does laura. its funny
its like they like him mroe then i do. lol jk
but id unno its cute=]
im not complaining right now wit it.
i miss brenden. he called me yesterday and it was right after i had been cryin about skool and i heard his voice and i started crying 2 him like it was just all the stress. i told him i got a phonecall 4 math n id idnt know anythign else at the time, and i told him i was getting sick over everything. and he felt so bad he was like well emily u r 1 of the smartest girls i know, and u try harder then any1 and i dunno i always go to him 4 skool support cause hes the only1 who really truly understands. and he just made me feel better but i miss him so much.
hes coming here at the end of the summer 4 like 2 weeks tho
it just sucks hes not here.,
he left the morning b4 my 1st exam and i went 2 skool crying=[
he took me out 2 dinner liek amonth ago and i felt so close 2 him. like we had a really good convo, he was just telling me how he sees me being successful in life, and whatever i do will b the right decision n he said its okay 2 occasionally smoke or drink 2 have a funt ime but also let me know i dont need it, and he said it would hurt him 2 c me become bad and using other drugs cause it just wouldnt b good. and id unno we had a really good time.
it was nice
and hes gone. i dunno
i miss my brother
i feel so lost
ive been so sick lately. i cant eat. like emotionally sick. i just cant eat. i had a granolla bar 2day
and a yogurt yesterday
i just feel so emotionally fucked up
nothing is okay right now.
i want 2 b okay i want to b happy. i want 2 b some1 else and somewhere else.
i dont like who i am
i have been so depressed, and a sign of depression is frustration
and i have been super frustrated lately
ive been spazzing and bitching lately
everything is makine me angry, mad, frustrated, upset,
i dunno
i feel so angry at the world