I hate to be predictable with my two letter responses, but...oh. I'm not going to even bother crossing this out because I really don't care who sees it. You can let go all you want. But I'm not going to. And, yes, I'm confused and hurt and angry and sad and so very lost. But I'm not ready to let anything go. Maybe the timing will always be wrong. Maybe there will always be something in the way. Still, you can't just stop feeling the way you feel. We, as humans, don't work like that.
I don't want to start from scratch. Scratch goes back to nothing. And we will never be nothing. Not even for a split second. You're my best friend. You will always be my best friend. I can hate you and then hate you some more because I have no one to talk to about it. But it's all going to come back to you being my friend. My best friend. Maybe there never will be anything else. Maybe it's not meant to happen. But I am not willing to rule it out right now. Not while I'm still trying to piece myself back together.
If you're not willing to wait, fine. But I'm going to need the piece of my heart that you hold back. Please.
I don't want to start from scratch. Scratch goes back to nothing. And we will never be nothing. Not even for a split second. You're my best friend. You will always be my best friend. I can hate you and then hate you some more because I have no one to talk to about it. But it's all going to come back to you being my friend. My best friend. Maybe there never will be anything else. Maybe it's not meant to happen. But I am not willing to rule it out right now. Not while I'm still trying to piece myself back together.
If you're not willing to wait, fine. But I'm going to need the piece of my heart that you hold back. Please.
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