Yet again, it has been a while
yeah... has been quite a while, I've been very busy doing basically nothing. Now, what I mean is, not nothing, just not what I've supposed to been doing, like Homework. I have had fun doing things like watching Arrested Development Season 1 on DVD, (which is the all time best show on television, by far, but I'll come back to that,) reading great books like A Million Little Peices, and posting photo art up on deviant art. (The link is somewhere up there on my page, go visit! I command thee!) I have been avoiding do this work, because whenever I sit down and try to do it, I get dizzy, nauseous, and weak. This has to do with the fact that I have gone to sick kids, and been asessed for attention problems, and was told that I have a slight case of ADD, but that I mostly have an Anxiety disorder, basically, I have maxed out anxiety levels pretty much all the time. This means that things that cause even more anxiety in me, like the prospect of all of the work that I'm behind on, make me get dizzy and feel sick, to the point where if I push myself enough, I'll pass out. You can understand the dilemma, its not as though I can just sit down and start working, not unless I want to wake up on the floor a lot, and I can't exactly ignore the stuff, because then the anxiety gets worse. Considering the fact that this is crunch time (as in there are three days until my first exam,) doesn't make it any better, the pressure's really on now, and I'm starting to crack. Par example, I'm sitting in the YB room on my spare after just failing a summative that is worth 5% of my grade in the class, which is only at 55 or 56 % anyways. I'm in here feeling defeated, frustrated, sad, regretful, and confused. What am I supposed to do? I mean I guess that the best thing for my health, in the long run, is to try, but not to psuh myself too hard, and then just let life happen, I don't mean to say that I'll just give up, but try to an extent that I know I'll be alright with, and then just hope thats enough. I mean next sem is going to be totally different, I have YB, Photog, and Comm Tech, so I mean I'll be flying immediately, conisdering the fact that most of the stuff I'll be doing will be computers and cameras (two of my favourite things to do anyways.) So I dunno, I have the option of going on something to help me with this anxiety, but I won't be able to get it until after exams anyways, so its more than likely pointless. You can start to see why I'm frustrated and confused, I have a hard time just functioning under this kind of pressure, and just when I'm expected to deliver, I'm feeling more like caving in, curling up in a little ball under a pile of blankets and falling asleep. But enough of my problems, oh yeah, lets go on to something that makes me happy, Arrested Development, the greatest show on TV. Now I miust sound like a little kid, Arrested Development is the best show on tv cause its funny. No seriously, it is funny, but its so funny because its so smart, it is reminicent of the crazyness and randomness of Monty Python, but is set in a very realistic setting and filmed like a documentary. It flows nothing like a sitcom, and feels nothing like a sitcom, you start to feel like you're looking into the lives of real people and just watching them go about their lives. The acting on the show is hilarious, and the characters make me want to die laughing, just all of the sillyness and awkwardness and confusion. Ok so I'll explain for the benefit of those who haven't seen the show, Arrested is about the Bluth family, who founded, own, and run the Bluth Company. The head honcho is George Bluth Sr. who founded the company, and ran it until he went to jail for crimes against the company (embezzelment and a bunch of other stuff.) He has 4 kids, GOB (George Oscar Bluth,) Michael & Lindsey (Twins,) and Buster. Michael is the normal one, who has to deal with his crazy spoiled family, and try to get them to stop spending the company's money. The show revolves around Michael and his son George Michael, and their constant struggle to keep the rest of the family in line, and persue their love lives (Michael's wife died years earlier.) I could go on and on about the show, but I'll let you see it for yourselves. Ooops I forgot, its being canceled on Fox, because Fox doesn't think witty shows are good for buisness. But yeah, come over to my place and you can watch my season 1 on dvd, or ask me and I'll send you episodes. I must go spare is over... talk to you later.