Circle 11

[oatmeal_peril]

Circle
Pairing(s): HaeHyuk, HyukMin
Rating: NC-17
Warning(s): Incest, sex, character death, disturbing themes, gender switch (Sungmin), horror, graphic gore, reference to under age sex etc.

Summary: Donghae does everything to protect and care for his twin brother, Hyukjae. No one comes between them. No one.
A life full of lies and deceit and an unconditional love that borders on dangerous; Donghae and Hyukjae are always running away from their dark past, but how long can the twins keep running for?



Hyukjae had this recurring dream where he was blindfolded and left sitting in nothing but his underwear. He could hear distant voices and footsteps. He was so turned on, his underwear was straining but he didn't know why. The voices were growing closer. A man and a woman. He couldn't make out what was being said but he could hear whispers and giggles.
“Who... Who's there?” Hyukjae said, his voice sounded small, almost a whisper. The whispers and giggles stopped, the silence was thick. “Hello?”
“Hello, Hyukjae,” someone breathed into his ear. It was a man's voice, he recognised the voice but it wasn't that that he was most concerned with most, it was the warm hand that had settled on his crotch, his dick resting between their fingers.
Hyukjae's mouth opened but no sound escaped it. He could feel someone's warm breath on his cheek. He swallowed hard. He could feel his chest rising and falling rapidly, his skin was sweat slicked and he was hot, he was so hot. The heat was rising in his chest, making his cheeks flushed.
Hyukjae was suddenly aware that his arms were restrained behind his back. He struggled, wanting to touch himself, the need to free his cock was imminent.
“Hyukjae,” the voice cooed. “What's the rush, baby?” He felt the hands move from his dick and up to his chest, fingers gently scratching him so he shivered. “We have all the time in the world, there's no need to rush at all.”
The voice was soothing, low and rich. Hyukjae felt his eyes fluttering shut behind the blindfold and his head leaning towards the the voice. The hands were gentle, they massaged him and made him whimper excitedly, his head was leant on the shoulder of whoever it was and he could feel the person's hair on his face. The hands massages small circles on his chest, fingers flicked at his nipples so Hyukjae jolted and mewled, his hard on was sticking to him, he could feel it pulsing, pre cum leaked freely from the tip, it was so uncomfortable that it felt sore.
“P-please...” He found himself gasping.
“Mmm?” The voice purred in his ear, “what's wrong?”
“M-my... Touch me... Please.”
“I am touching you.”
“No, my...My....” Hyukjae sobbed dryly, “please.”
The voice chuckled darkly. “Say it.”
“My dick. Please...”
Hyukjae felt plush lips pressed to his cheek. He kissed him. “Patience, baby.” They continued to kiss him, hands remaining on his upper torso, lips trailing kisses down to his throat, their teeth gently grazing his skin while they repeated, “patience, baby, patience.”

Hyukjae's breath was coming out hard, he searched for the person's shoulder to lean on again but they'd shifted. He didn't know why he was so turned on and why he trusted the unfamiliar voice.
Suddenly, he felt a cold palm on his stomach. He shivered. Someone giggled - it was a girl.
“Guess who?”
“S-Sungmin?”
She giggled again. “You're right. You should get rewarded for being right.” She dragged her fingernails down his taut torso and then, her hand dipped into his underwear.
He gasped and shuddered. Her fingers wrapped around his painfully hard dick and he lifted his hips to meet her hand, moaning as he did so. The man was still kissing him, his hot mouth met Hyukjae's own and Hyukjae kissed back hard. His whole body writhed with pleasure, he was delirious with lust and heat. “Hyung,” the man breathed and Hyukjae shivered, “I've always wanted you, from when I first met you. In the office, hyung, imagine what we could have done together - in the store cupboard, in the bathroom, on the desk when anyone could walk in.”
“Kyu-Kyuhyun?”
“Don't you want me too?” He asked.
Hyukjae's mouth opened, he wanted to reply but couldn't. Sungmin stroked harder and he moaned, his fingers curled and he jerked.
“Turn over.” Sungmin whispered. Before Hyukjae knew it, he was being bent over, legs spread apart and he trembled. His head rested on someone's lap. He could feel a cold finger tracing his hole, soft breath on his skin. Fingers stroked his hair gently and he felt a wet finger pushing into him. When he whimpered, Sungmin cooed and shushed him. He felt a tongue, wet, licking around his puckered hole, reaching inside, probing deep, pulling cheeks apart while Sungmin's finger continued to reach in further.

“He's mine.” A low voice growled.
Suddenly, everything was taken away and he was cold. The blindfold was wrenched from his eyes and he squinted in the bright light.
“You're mine, Hyuk.”
It was Donghae. He stood over his brother, his eyes were dark and wild. He wet his lips, “whose are you?”
“Yours.” Hyukjae found himself gasping, he was panting, his pupils dilated, his cock still hard and twitching uncontrollably. He wanted Donghae more than ever.
“Finger yourself,” Donghae commanded. Hyukjae reached down, pushing his middle finger into himself. He groaned, his insides were hot, he could feel them pulsing around his finger. Donghae' eyes were fixed on him but he could see Kyuhyun and Sungmin, he was kissing down her small body until he reached her soft folds where he slowly began to lap at her with his tongue. Hyukjae watched as an expression of pure bliss settled on Sungmin's angelic face.
“Don't look at them.” Donghae said quietly. “It's just you and me.”
Donghae took hold of his brother's dick and with his own, he traced his brother's hole before pushing in. Hyukjae called out and his eyes glazed with lust, he reared and bucked , losing control, all he could think of was his twin's dick filling him right up to his guts. Kyuhyun and Sungmin's eyes were on him and they watched Donghae riding him hard and deep, making him cry out and moan unashamedly. He liked the attention, he liked being watched. He was overwhelmed with the stretching sensation of Donghae inside of him, of feeling dirty because Kyuhyun and Sungmin could see and hear everything and a sort of sexual awareness he'd never felt before. He didn't feel shy or embarrassed, he wanted them to see and hear, he wanted them to want him.
Donghae gripped onto Hyukjae's hips as he pounded him, Hyukjae had tears him his eyes as he reached for him brother, clinging onto his forearms. He squeezed his eyes shut and suddenly, he could feel a mouth hot and tight around his cock. Sungmin's eyes met his when he opened them again, her fingers inside her own slippery hole. When he opened his mouth to moan, it was met with Kyuhyun's. Hyukjae could hardly kiss back, his head was swimming, he felt like he was going to explode; he couldn't speak, he couldn't think. He could see Donghae over him, ecstasy in his eyes as he called out Hyukjae's name, cumming hard inside of him.

He woke up with a start. Someone had slammed a car door outside. Hyukjae was panting and his back was wet. For a few moments, he didn't know where he was or what time it was. Then he remembered falling asleep late that afternoon after Donghae had left for work.
Gingerly, he slipped his hand into his underwear. He was hard and his underwear was soaking wet. He got up and went into the bathroom. He was aware of how heavily he was breathing already and how cold the bathroom tiles were underfoot.
He stood under the shower and ran the water. He remembered that this is what Donghae and he used to do when they lived with Heechul and Ryeowook. They were still young and so it wasn't too strange that they always used the bathroom together. The running water would drown out the sounds of their moans as they grabbed and groped each other. Hyukjae remembered the sounds of skin against skin and Donghae's grunts echoing off of the tiled walls. He fisted his cock screwed his eyes shut tightly. He thought of Donghae, hot and hard, pushing into him but he could imagine Sungmin's large eyes looking up at him, her pretty mouth around his dick that he pumped harder in time with Donghae's imaginary thrusts. His legs trembled when he came and he gasped, shuddering as he stroked out the last few waves of his orgasm.

He felt sick when he stepped out of the shower. How could he feel so turned on when he knew what he had to do today?

When the doorbell rang, Hyukjae still felt physically sick. He felt his stomach lurch like he was riding a badly driven bus. His whole body prickled with heat and his footsteps felt heavy as he crossed the living room to answer the front door.
Kyuhyun looked a little nervous when Hyukjae opened the door to him. He thrust a bottle of wine in Hyukjae's hands, “I don't know if you drink wine, hyung, but it's what you do when someone invites you over for dinner, isn't it?”
Hyukjae forced a smile that looked more like a grimace and invited Kyuhyun inside. Kyuhyun took in his surroundings while Hyukjae went into the kitchen to fetch glasses. He stood pressing his back to the wall hard, as if to make sure that this wasn't a dream by testing his ability to feel.

“Your house is so neat, hyung.” Kyuhyun said when Hyukjae returned to the living room. “You're so tidy.” Hyukjae couldn't speak. “Are all these trophies yours?” He asked, leaning forward and peering into the glass case that held Donghae's trophies, some old photographs of them together and with their family and other things.
“No. They're my brother's. I don't like sport.”
Kyuhyun smiled when he straightened up. “I don't either. I played chess when I was in school; the youngest person to ever win a nationwide tournament.” Kyuhyun blushed, stopping himself.
“My dad wanted me to play soccer, like Donghae,” Hyukjae said, “but I was never as good. I think that's why dad always favoured Donghae.”
Kyuhyun was chewing on the inside of his cheek. “I'm sure that's not true... I'm sure your dad loves both of you just as much.”
“You don't have to be kind, Kyuhyun. My dad died a long time ago.”
“I-I'm sorry.” Kyuhyun stammered.
Hyukjae smiled, “don't be.” He poured the wine and gestured for Kyuhyun to sit down.
“Will your brother be having dinner with us?” Kyuhyun asked.
“No.” Hyukjae replied almost sharply. Donghae wasn't going to know about this. “He's out. He works nights.”

The wine tasted tart and made Hyukjae's nose wrinkle. He didn't drink often and when he did it made him feel light-headed and sick. He felt a warm rush through his veins.
“I usually drink beer,” Kyuhyun told Hyukjae, “wine feels too grown up.”
Hyukjae found himself smiling. When he looked at Kyuhyun, he was so often reminded of a little boy and sometimes, himself, especially when he was younger. It made everything harder.
He felt so nervous that he couldn't speak, he just drank deeply from his wine glass, hastily pouring himself more when he finished.
Kyuhyun looked uncomfortable, he nursed his glass, swilling the crimson liquid before saying nervously, “hyung... Why did you invite me here?”
“I-I told you.” Hyukjae stammered, his voice sounded strangely loud, “I wanted to spend more time with you.”
Kyuhyun swallowed, “I know but... But... You know I like you but... But...” His cheeks flushed furiously and his adam's apple bobbed in his swan like throat as he swallowed his embarrassment and started again. “I told you I was gay and I... I confessed to you and now you're telling me that you want to spend time with me without Sungmin.” Kyuhyun's large eyes looked troubled. He stammered as he spoke and couldn't keep eye contact with Hyukjae. “Can you understand why I'm confused..?”
Hyukjae didn't answer. He bit his lip.
“My parents... My parents never really accepted me. I think they're still waiting for me to walk through the front door with a girl on my arm.” Kyuhyun punctuated himself with a laugh that sounded too harsh to be natural, “you're the only person who's ever accepted me for who I am and that means a lot to me...”
“Kyuhuyn-”
“Hyung, please. I have to hear you say it.”
“I don't understand.”
“You need to tell me that it's all in my head. You need to tell me that you don't like me.”
“But I do like you, Kyuhuyn.”
“No! Not in the way I mean. Hyung, I don't want to spend this evening thinking it's more than it is. We're just friends, aren't we?”

They were friends but didn't Kyuhyun put Hyukjae at ease? Didn't he make him smile and feel happy? It felt good just to be with Kyuhyun and Hyukjae wasn't sure whether that was friendship or something more. He'd never explored it, Kyuhyun had only ever been a work colleague, a casual friend he had a drink with occasionally, nothing more. But it didn't really matter what it was he felt, or why he felt it. Not now. It was too late.

When he turned to look at Kyuhyun again, Kyuhuyn's embarrassment had been replaced by something else, something that wavered between sadness and hurt.
“Listen, hyung... Maybe I should go.” Kyuhyun said, his voice sounded choked and his eyes seemed unnaturally glassy, like they were tear filled. “I shouldn't have come... I understand that you're just being friendly but... I don't think it's a good idea.”
Kyuhyun stood up but Hyukjae jumped to his feet too, making Kyuhyun start. “No!” he said sharply.
“Hyung?”
“No.” He repeated. “Kyuhyun-ah... You're the best friend I ever had.”
“I don't want to confuse things. I need to grow up, I can't keep thinking that I love everyone who shows me the slightest bit of kindness.”
Suddenly, Kyuhyun's eyes grew wide, realising what he had said to Hyukjae.
“You... You love me?”
Kyuhyun shook his head and got to his feet, sloshing wine from his glass, “this was a bad idea, I'm sorry hyung. I should go. I should never have come. I'm sorry.”
Hyukjae had got to his feet too. He reached for Kyuhyun's hand and clasped it in his own. Kyuhyun's jaw tightened and he looked like a little boy about to cry and Hyukjae remembered holding onto Donghae's hand when he was young. He remembered being at his mother's funeral, his fingers wrapped tightly around Donghae's while tears streamed down his cheeks but when he looked up at Donghae, the expression in his eyes was fierce. Donghae hadn't cried. He remembered how small and fragile he had seemed back then and how strong Donghae had seemed. Right now, he felt like Donghae.

“I always end up hurting those who I care about the most...” Hyukjae said quietly, his heart pounding in his chest and he wasn't sure if he felt sick because he knew what was going to come next or if he was feeling a thrill - a sick thrill but a thrill nonetheless. “And I don't want to hurt you, Kyuhyun-ah... But I'd love it if you stayed.”
He wanted to tell Kyuhyun that he should go, he should go before he hurt him. The people he loved always ended up getting hurt.
Kyuhyun bit his full bottom lip, lips that Hyukjae had dreamed of kissing him all over until he couldn't take it any more. Kyuhyun tried to blink his tears away but they spilled down his cheeks, “hyung... You're so kind.”
Kyuhyun's hand trembled in Hyukjae's. Hyukjae squeezed it lightly. “I'd really like it if you stayed, Kyuhyun.”
“I'm making such a fool of myself,” Kyuhyun said quietly, “I'm so sorry, hyung.”
“Kyuhyun, we're friends. Don't worry.” He gestured for Kyuhyun to sit back down which he did. “I'll get you some water and then maybe we can make a start on dinner.”
He was in the kitchen again, heart pounding in his chest. He felt dizzy but this was something he had to do. Kyuhyun really was the best friend he had ever had but if there was one thing that Donghae had taught him, it was that outsiders never understood. Jongwoon hadn't understood and Sungmin wouldn't have understood if she found out either. Kyuhyun would be no different. If Hyukjae knew another way, another way that would make him and Donghae safe, that would stop the truth from coming out and stop more people getting hurt then he'd do it but he didn't know any other way. Kyuhyun would be the last.

He'd decided that the best thing to use would be the left over rope that he and Donghae had used to tie up the black refuse bag they'd buried Jongwoon in. Quite honestly, he hadn't thought too much about it, the idea that he was planning this was much worse. Wasn't it more sinful for him to plan than for him to just do, by accident and have to beg for forgiveness? An accident can be forgiven. Premeditated murder couldn't be.

Kyuhyun had dried his eyes when Hyukjae returned to the living room, gripping the rope in both hands.
“Hyung, I hope we can forget about all that. I appreciate what you said... You're also the best friend I've ever had and I don't want to ruin things by being so stupid.”
Hyukjae didn't reply. He couldn't. He swallowed hard; he had to do this to prove to himself that he could, that he didn't need Donghae to protect him all the time because he could protect himself.
Kyuhyun was still talking but it was if Hyukjae couldn't hear him, just a buzzing in his ears when Kyuhyun's mouth moved.
He stood behind the sofa, Kyuhyun's back to him and with a sharp intake of breath, he did it. He knew he had to do it then, before he changed his mind and let Kyuhyun go, jeopardising everything.
Kyuhyun let out a strangled yelp, his hands instinctively reached for the rope that Hyukjae held tight and he began to thrash around to free himself. “Hyung!” The blood was pounding in Hyukjae's ears and suddenly, he felt so strong. He felt more powerful than ever. His pupils dilated and he felt his whole body buzzing. He liked to see Kyuhyun beneath him; helpless; his pale, delicate throat moving, trying to breathe but failing. Hyukjae felt a rush of excitement tinged with disgust. Disgust at himself. He had told Kyuhyun that he was his friend, friends don't do this to each other.
“I'm sorry, Kyuhuyn.” Hyukjae said quietly, tightening the rope so that Kyuhyun made a guttural sound and thrashed even more violently.

He knew he should close his eyes, he knew he shouldn't see this but there was a part of him that wanted to. He really wanted to, he had to see it. The rope dug deep into Kyuhyun's pale skin, leaving a crimson mark and Hyukjae couldn't work out whether it was blood or not. He saw Kyuhyun's adam's apple bob, trying to swallow. Kyuhyun squirmed, fingers wrapped around the rope but he didn't have enough strength to free himself. His dark eyes bulged and he was gasping. “P-please..!”
“I'm so sorry.” Hyukjae repeated, he was almost thankful for the tears in his eyes blurring the expression of utter horror and betrayal on Kyuhyun's face.
Hyukjae didn't know how long it took but Kyuhyun soon stopped resisting and became limp. He dropped the rope. His hands were shaking and suddenly, everything had become eerily still and silent. He didn't look down. He moved away from the sofa until his back connected with the door of the basement. He felt his legs crumble and he sank to the floor. He heaved and retched, the feeling of power that he had had while Kyuhyun choked and writhed beneath him reminded him of when he choked Donghae, it gave him the same sort of thrill and power surge making his heart race and his dick jerk awake.

It was okay now. It was almost over. He closed his eyes, lips moving in silent prayer. “Forgive me. Please forgive me.” Forgiveness was all he could ask for now. He'd dispose of the body quickly, before Donghae could know about it and pray some more until it all went away and things were better. Things would get better now.
A noise made Hyukjae's eyes snap open and his head jerk up. Kyuhyun had stood, staggering forwards clumsily, knocking the wine all over the floor before falling to his knees, gasping like a newborn. He had been playing dead but he couldn't hold his breath after Hyukjae had choked him for so long.
Hyukjae cursed, adrenaline pumping through him, carrying him forwards, willing him to finish this. He was angry, angry with himself because he couldn't do one simple thing right. Donghae would laugh, Donghae would call him useless and say that he always had to do everything for him. He wasn't useless! He could do exactly what Donghae did! He could do it!
Kyuhyun was coughing and rasping, he was trying to crawl away to the door but Hyukjae couldn't allow that. Kyuhyun was weak when he struggled with Hyukjae, Hyukjae overpowered him with ease and straddled him, pinning him to the floor.
“Hyung...” He sobbed dryly, “please...”
Kyuhyun's throat felt cold beneath his hands. The fragility and feeling of Kyuhyun so helpless beneath him turned him on.
“I'm sorry, Kyuhyun, I really am. I have to do this.” Hyukjae explained, “you know too much. You don't understand now but... You'd work it out and I can't risk that.”
Kyuhyun kicked feebly, his eyes rolled back when Hyukjae's grip tightened. “Please.” Kyuhyun mouthed. Hyukjae looked away. He couldn't look into those eyes any more. Kyuhyun's hand reached up, fingers meeting Hyukjae's.
“I'm sorry,” Hyukjae cooed, “it won't be long now. Don't fight it, Kyuhyun-ah, don't fight it.”
Kyuhyun continued to struggle. Hyukjae reached around frantically, worried that he really couldn't do it by himself, looking for something to help him. His fingers wrapped around the soft upholstery of a cushion from the sofa and he pressed it to Kyuhyun's face with both hands. Kyuhyun's weak cries were muffled, his body shuddered and it was as if Hyukjae could almost feel the life draining from the younger. Kyuhyun stopped moving. This time, Hyukjae stayed still, hands in the same position until he was sure that Kyuhyun couldn't be faking it.

His chest shuddered. It felt different to Jongwoon and to Heechul. There was no one there to reassure him or help him, he had done this on his own. He heaved again, an agonising pain made his chest tighten. This wasn't a stranger, this wasn't someone who bullied him or taunted him when he was a child, this was his friend. He'd killed his friend.
Kyuhyun was warm when Hyukjae held him in his arms and sobbed into his chest. “Please forgive me, Kyuhyun.” Hyukjae whispered to him through tears, “I never meant for you to get hurt like this. I'm sorry.”
This was going too far, he had betrayed Kyuhyun's trust and destroyed something so innocent... God wouldn't forgive him for this.