Rant
I need to let this out somewhere
I don't care if u read it or not injust need to get it out in the open
Well as open as posing it on lj can be lol
Anyway this rant is about a friend of mine and well i have been feeling like this for awhile now.
I sucks cause I consider this person to be one of my best friends
But.
Things have been getting more awkward boring and annoying whn I hang around her I mean we have a good time it's just now I am starting to see all the traits I really can't stand in a person her
It's kinda like a falling out I guess but I don't want to lose my friend especially right b4 graduation....which is why I am putting up with everything and also because we honestly havE allot in comon a nd have a great time hanging out.
But before I begin my rant on this person I need to address what is wrong with myself.
I am coming to the realization that I have what I am calling "paranoid friendship syndrome"
It kinda like u know the feeling when like after u have a fight wih a friend and then thy immediately start texting u think "damn they are talking shit about me" well that how I feel
I feel like this girl is being two faced with me and is talking shit behind my back with another BFF of mine
And it pisses me off case I know she does it
Gah
But anyway I know I should just trust her and stop being paranoid but it happens all the time
Now I am going to rant about her:
This girl and I get together really well I introduced her to anime Kpop EVERYTHING
We have been friends for like 4 years now and I don't want things to end badly cause this girl can turn into a real bitch
But anyWay hack on trackn
This girl is one of those people who gets offended by anything concerning her
As in she has a large ass temper and I have to be careful what I say and how I say it with her
This usually isn't that big of an issue but lately it has been showing more and pissing me off more
Seriously even a simple mistake will get her to yell at me or at least take a louder tone of voice
After the experiences with my ex stepdad I can't take yell or raised voices it freaks me out and gets me in a "defend territory" mode.
EvErythig that happens is always my fault
Every mood change is my fault
When I am just not in a good mood I better get over it or else my friends will say I am in an "emo Sarah phase" an thy will just talk to each other which brings in the paranoid friend thing again
Honestly it is starting to make me think aftEr graduation I just wot talk to these people anymore
But I don't want that to happen
Idek what I am saying
Back to the rant:
This girl has a condescending voice when we have different points of view
For example
She is homophobic
Which poses me off but she doesn't know that
She doesn't know about my lj hobby or anything
It's like living a secret life
I have to act when I am with her sometimes cause I don't want her to get all pissy and offended
Usually when we get into an argument she is all like "well fine then I will just leave" and she knows I hate ending things on a bad note
So I give in and deal
I don't like deciding what to do and she hates that
I always have her decide what to do because it's easier for me and so that I don't pick something she doesn't want to do
I told her this and she said "I will do anything blah blah"
I know for a fact that shmay do anything but she will get a pissy attitude about it and become a total bitch
So she picks because I would rather not have to think
Also another thing
This girl Gets into things so easily
We started watching Hana Kimi and she doesn't have a computer so she watches it at my hous
We litteally watch it all day
Non stop
And I die
I don't like just sittig and watching things especially things I have already seen
I would be fine if we could talk while it's on but she hates when people (especially me) talk during any shows or movies
So I sit there like fuck my life
I like talking during movies and shows
I don't talk about random shit I actually on talk about the show
And I dont spoil anything either
All of u know how fucking long an episod of a drama is times that be 5 and that's ho long we sit there watching shows
After Hana Kimi is over I have already promised myself to not introduce her to ANYTHING anymore
Sadly I think this is one of the first steps to the slow ending of best friend ship
We will still bE friends yes but not hanging out all the time
Which may suck duringthe summer
Honestly I just need to put up with it till I go to college in the fall or until she goes in late summer
I can last
I just needed o get this out cause she is seriously pissing me off so fucking much I want to punch her in the face I can't Even handle it right now
She is sitting next to me now watching Hana Kimi on my computer causshe was gEtting all pissed cause shE didn't get to watch it last weekend
Why didn't we
Cause when e were going to my computer decided to update and turn to bs
All of u with a pc know ofthis horror
Well she has a Mac
So she doesn't
She said today that I have been purposely making my computer break and update
Wtf
What the absoutle fuck
I was pissed off so much
In still am
Why the hell would I mess up my own computer
Honestly
Ugh so now things are awkward causE I don't wan o deal wih her bs everything is my fault gah
ShE has such a high opoion of herself and also has this like " I care to much about what other people think of me issue" so everything shE says or does has to be what society and he "cool" kids at our school do and like
She hasnt told anyone about her watching anime and when ppl ask she is all "that's for freaks"
I am not allowed by her to act "weird" when she is around certain ppl
It's fucking bull shit
And think very 2 faced
She is getting better with it slowly but these other problems are manifesting themselves making this one come back to haunt me
One more episode of Hana Kimi down
Haha now she is saying she feels bad that we aren't doing anything
I know that's bs
It cause my mom is here now and bc I am not staring at the screen with her
I understand what she is saying bu u know wht fuck it she wantedto watch Hana Kimi the. She will watch it
And I will sit here and ran away
Because that is all i can do
Could I stop her and havE us do something else yeah but then I would have he issue be brought up again later "u don't let me finish the show" blah blah then look it up ur damn self!!
She has a smart phone with Internet
Just saying
Ugh i can't anymore
I am going on tumblr I will rant more later
Let's hope nothing else happens today
Mofo needs to calm her tits as they would say on tumblr
Bai bai sorry to spam ur "dash" with this nonsense
I don't care if u read it or not injust need to get it out in the open
Well as open as posing it on lj can be lol
Anyway this rant is about a friend of mine and well i have been feeling like this for awhile now.
I sucks cause I consider this person to be one of my best friends
But.
Things have been getting more awkward boring and annoying whn I hang around her I mean we have a good time it's just now I am starting to see all the traits I really can't stand in a person her
It's kinda like a falling out I guess but I don't want to lose my friend especially right b4 graduation....which is why I am putting up with everything and also because we honestly havE allot in comon a nd have a great time hanging out.
But before I begin my rant on this person I need to address what is wrong with myself.
I am coming to the realization that I have what I am calling "paranoid friendship syndrome"
It kinda like u know the feeling when like after u have a fight wih a friend and then thy immediately start texting u think "damn they are talking shit about me" well that how I feel
I feel like this girl is being two faced with me and is talking shit behind my back with another BFF of mine
And it pisses me off case I know she does it
Gah
But anyway I know I should just trust her and stop being paranoid but it happens all the time
Now I am going to rant about her:
This girl and I get together really well I introduced her to anime Kpop EVERYTHING
We have been friends for like 4 years now and I don't want things to end badly cause this girl can turn into a real bitch
But anyWay hack on trackn
This girl is one of those people who gets offended by anything concerning her
As in she has a large ass temper and I have to be careful what I say and how I say it with her
This usually isn't that big of an issue but lately it has been showing more and pissing me off more
Seriously even a simple mistake will get her to yell at me or at least take a louder tone of voice
After the experiences with my ex stepdad I can't take yell or raised voices it freaks me out and gets me in a "defend territory" mode.
EvErythig that happens is always my fault
Every mood change is my fault
When I am just not in a good mood I better get over it or else my friends will say I am in an "emo Sarah phase" an thy will just talk to each other which brings in the paranoid friend thing again
Honestly it is starting to make me think aftEr graduation I just wot talk to these people anymore
But I don't want that to happen
Idek what I am saying
Back to the rant:
This girl has a condescending voice when we have different points of view
For example
She is homophobic
Which poses me off but she doesn't know that
She doesn't know about my lj hobby or anything
It's like living a secret life
I have to act when I am with her sometimes cause I don't want her to get all pissy and offended
Usually when we get into an argument she is all like "well fine then I will just leave" and she knows I hate ending things on a bad note
So I give in and deal
I don't like deciding what to do and she hates that
I always have her decide what to do because it's easier for me and so that I don't pick something she doesn't want to do
I told her this and she said "I will do anything blah blah"
I know for a fact that shmay do anything but she will get a pissy attitude about it and become a total bitch
So she picks because I would rather not have to think
Also another thing
This girl Gets into things so easily
We started watching Hana Kimi and she doesn't have a computer so she watches it at my hous
We litteally watch it all day
Non stop
And I die
I don't like just sittig and watching things especially things I have already seen
I would be fine if we could talk while it's on but she hates when people (especially me) talk during any shows or movies
So I sit there like fuck my life
I like talking during movies and shows
I don't talk about random shit I actually on talk about the show
And I dont spoil anything either
All of u know how fucking long an episod of a drama is times that be 5 and that's ho long we sit there watching shows
After Hana Kimi is over I have already promised myself to not introduce her to ANYTHING anymore
Sadly I think this is one of the first steps to the slow ending of best friend ship
We will still bE friends yes but not hanging out all the time
Which may suck duringthe summer
Honestly I just need to put up with it till I go to college in the fall or until she goes in late summer
I can last
I just needed o get this out cause she is seriously pissing me off so fucking much I want to punch her in the face I can't Even handle it right now
She is sitting next to me now watching Hana Kimi on my computer causshe was gEtting all pissed cause shE didn't get to watch it last weekend
Why didn't we
Cause when e were going to my computer decided to update and turn to bs
All of u with a pc know ofthis horror
Well she has a Mac
So she doesn't
She said today that I have been purposely making my computer break and update
Wtf
What the absoutle fuck
I was pissed off so much
In still am
Why the hell would I mess up my own computer
Honestly
Ugh so now things are awkward causE I don't wan o deal wih her bs everything is my fault gah
ShE has such a high opoion of herself and also has this like " I care to much about what other people think of me issue" so everything shE says or does has to be what society and he "cool" kids at our school do and like
She hasnt told anyone about her watching anime and when ppl ask she is all "that's for freaks"
I am not allowed by her to act "weird" when she is around certain ppl
It's fucking bull shit
And think very 2 faced
She is getting better with it slowly but these other problems are manifesting themselves making this one come back to haunt me
One more episode of Hana Kimi down
Haha now she is saying she feels bad that we aren't doing anything
I know that's bs
It cause my mom is here now and bc I am not staring at the screen with her
I understand what she is saying bu u know wht fuck it she wantedto watch Hana Kimi the. She will watch it
And I will sit here and ran away
Because that is all i can do
Could I stop her and havE us do something else yeah but then I would have he issue be brought up again later "u don't let me finish the show" blah blah then look it up ur damn self!!
She has a smart phone with Internet
Just saying
Ugh i can't anymore
I am going on tumblr I will rant more later
Let's hope nothing else happens today
Mofo needs to calm her tits as they would say on tumblr
Bai bai sorry to spam ur "dash" with this nonsense