Call me an artist.
I finally have some free time to write. It seems like forever since I have had down time.
Things are still well here. I'm still trying to keep a positive outlook on life. I once heard that artists feel differently than everyone else. They feel more, and they feel stronger. Call me an artist. Sometimes I wish I didn't feel anything at all. That has to be better than feeling so much at once, right? Even when I'm numb, I'm not. I guess you would have to see things through my eyes to understand.
Eric and I have had several long and drawn out conversations about God. What is God? These things still remain a mystery to me. I consider myself a bit new age. Spiritual. Open-Minded. Positive that God is made of energy. Believing of good energy and bad energy. The rest leaves me confused. I feel no closer to answers than I have before. This heaven and hell stuff.... god of vengeance.... end of days... religious convictions.... preaching of freedom when all they really offer is bondage. I do not understand any of that. I suppose I have to "walk by faith" and trust that God is, and that he is with me.... and hope that I am right to reject the binds of religion and the rules of the righteous..... and to just follow him. To search for answers without fear. To be... and I would say to be holy, but what is holy? What man considers holy could be opposite of what God considers holy. I have said before that I feel with all my heart and soul that the only sin is to harm another or yourself. The rest is just preference.
Next year I will be spreading my vacation and holiday time out with my regular days off to maximize my travel time..... and I AM going to travel. I have to find what it is I am looking for. I have to be free.
-A
Things are still well here. I'm still trying to keep a positive outlook on life. I once heard that artists feel differently than everyone else. They feel more, and they feel stronger. Call me an artist. Sometimes I wish I didn't feel anything at all. That has to be better than feeling so much at once, right? Even when I'm numb, I'm not. I guess you would have to see things through my eyes to understand.
Eric and I have had several long and drawn out conversations about God. What is God? These things still remain a mystery to me. I consider myself a bit new age. Spiritual. Open-Minded. Positive that God is made of energy. Believing of good energy and bad energy. The rest leaves me confused. I feel no closer to answers than I have before. This heaven and hell stuff.... god of vengeance.... end of days... religious convictions.... preaching of freedom when all they really offer is bondage. I do not understand any of that. I suppose I have to "walk by faith" and trust that God is, and that he is with me.... and hope that I am right to reject the binds of religion and the rules of the righteous..... and to just follow him. To search for answers without fear. To be... and I would say to be holy, but what is holy? What man considers holy could be opposite of what God considers holy. I have said before that I feel with all my heart and soul that the only sin is to harm another or yourself. The rest is just preference.
Next year I will be spreading my vacation and holiday time out with my regular days off to maximize my travel time..... and I AM going to travel. I have to find what it is I am looking for. I have to be free.
-A