television static
television static [Sungmin/Ryeowook] pg13/angst
{ Sungmin meets Ryeowook in the schoolyard. AU. }
for remixied who is the g to my sparrow. *_*
television static
You meet Ryeowook for the first time when you’re in fifth grade and everything is losing its meaning. Ryeowook has such kind eyes that you offer to share your cookie and maybe your heart too. The boy giggles, small hands coming up to cover his pretty white teeth, and the cookie crumbles a little in your hand.
“What’s your name?”
Your swings create the same noise and lunch lays forgotten between your legs.
“Kim Ryeowook.”
“I’m Lee Sungmin.”
Ryeowook smiles shyly and you allow your hand to fall to your side, a little bit closer to the other swing, a little bit closer to Ryeowook.
-
The teacher drones on and on about variables and exponents, and you might as well be dreaming. You watch Ryeowook frown in concentration, little hand writing as fast as it can, and you sigh. You feel a tap on your shoulder and look around to see a pretty girl smiling widely.
“Hi, I forgot my pencil. Can I borrow yours?”
You smile back because this is eighth grade and boys are allowed to like girls now.
“Sure,” you say, handing her a pencil and letting your fingers linger for just a little while.
Her smile picks up at the ends and she giggles a little when you turn around. You are feeling quite elated but then you catch the edge of Ryeowook’s glare and it burns. Your smirk falters and diffuses as Ryeowook goes back to taking notes, quicker this time. You don’t know why but the utter sadness of Ryeowook’s eyes makes you feel like shit.
The girl gives you her number and you crumble up the paper as soon as she leaves. You plaster on a fake grin and swing an arm around Ryeowook’s slender frame.
“Want to go get ice cream?” you ask, hoping for your cheery voice to not waver.
Ryeowook bites his lower lips and says, “Aren’t we sort of old to get excited over this?”
You laugh, “You can never be too old for ice cream, silly. Let’s go.”
You marvel for only little while over how perfectly his hand fits together with yours.
-
You’re five months away from graduation when your mother tells you to stop hanging out with Ryeowook.
“People are starting to talk,” she whispers, glancing worriedly out the window as if society is just outside, all ready with clipboards and microscopes.
“About what?”
Her eyes are dim and her voice is dangerously low when she says, “About you two, together.”
You laugh just so you won’t cry and you wink, “Come on, Mom. You can’t seriously think we’re… you know.”
She sighs and brings her hands up to cover her face like she just can’t bear to look at you.
“Please stop before you kill me, Sungmin.”
Your laughter tastes bitter.
-
It’s strange, this thing that’s happening, and Ryeowook prays and prays for it all to stop. You watch from the sideline, from where you always are, and smile. Ryeowook always looks beautiful when he’s bleeding. Always.
-
As much as they say, no one really believes in God, because they have had countless prayers unanswered and many wishes forgotten. But, they still put on a nice smile, a nicer suit, and bring their family to the church. They stand under the scrutiny of society and they crack under pressure and sing the hymns perfectly.
“But, I really do believe in God,” Ryeowook says, dripping with innocence and fragile hopes. You don’t have the heart to taint such pureness, so you simply smile.
“Let’s go get something to eat.”
Ryeowook’s fingers brush against your knuckles as you both reach for the door at once. Ryeowook laughs it off, eyes crinkling delightfully as if it’s some sort of joke the way you’re watching him. Your lips slant a little and Ryeowook quickly grabs onto the ends and takes it as a smile.
You worry too much, you thinks as Ryeowook makes stupid jokes all the way to the ice cream shop, glancing every so often to make sure you are still listening.
I just wish you-
“We’re here!” Ryeowook swings open the door and in the next second, his face is glued to the clear plastic and his eyes are practically eating the ice cream. He points at the mango flavored ice cream, his finger bending at an almost grotesque angle, and says, “Sungmin, want to try that one with me?”
You nod, pretending to be very excited and muttering about how wonderful mangoes taste, and Ryeowook is fooled. Just like that.
-
He shouldn’t know these things, you think as he explains how self absorbed men make bad lovers. He should be innocent and ask you why something hard is rubbing against his thigh. That’s how it’s supposed to be, but he’s already kissing the inside of your knee and your foot is on his back.
He moves up ever so softly like he’s afraid you might not know how this goes.
You pull his face forward until he’s forced to moan into your lips, until he’s forced to say your name with such angelic pauses. This is wrong, you think when he looks horny and is yanking at your boxers. This is right, you think when he’s saying he loves you.
Selfish, he mutters under you and you laugh onto his spine.
-
“We can’t see each other anymore.”
Ryeowook’s fingers curl around the grass under him and he tries to snort, “You’re kidding, right?”
People break friendships all the time, it’s nothing out of the ordinary, so you don’t understand why Ryeowook is crying like it’s the end of the world.
You grind your teeth together, “Fuck it.”
You leave, carrying with you the permanent image of Ryeowook’s tears just about to spill and his heart cracking, breaking, and shattering until the aftermath ripples through your very bones.
-
Your mother pats your back and says thank you a thousand times until you try to escape by slipping under the trees. You climb walls and break telephone booths, but Ryeowook’s face remains etched all pretty and permanent right under your skin. And, it’s only when you’re cutting at something soft and oddly warm that you realize you’re dreaming.
-
Ryeowook doesn’t come to school some days and on those days you like to go down by the river and think of how the sunshine always liked his face better, his smile better. You had been jealous at those times when it seemed like everything was spinning just to keep Ryeowook smiling. And, now you’d do anything to see that smile.
It’s cloudy all of a sudden and you can almost hear Ryeowook. Selfish.
-
You’re standing in front of him and you wonder if you’re shaking as badly as you think you are. His eyes see you for a second but then he settles for the wall behind you.
“Um.” You wonder when your voice got so squeaky.
“What is it?”
“I love you.”
Shit, fuck, oh, dammit. That wasn’t what you meant to say. This isn’t how it was supposed to go. You came here to tell him you’re sorry but this is the end. That’s what you were supposed to say. This is the end. But, right now, he’s moving towards you and his hands are all over your face.
“I love you too,” he says, laughter in his voice, and you think that maybe this is how it’s supposed to be.
-
You tell your mother to go fuck herself, but in nicer terms and with cute faces. You hold her hand and tell her you can’t stop seeing Ryeowook just because she’s afraid of being treated different by her little clique. You’ve found their little get-togethers distasteful anyway.
She doesn’t cry, but she does tell you you’re going to regret it. They won’t see you the same anywhere, she says, leering in that way mothers’ can.
You hold her face and tell her you don’t give a shit.
She doesn’t talk to you for a month.
-
Ryeowook says he hasn’t told his parents yet and maybe he never will. You ask him what he’s going to do when they want him to get married and have pretty grandchildren. He says there’s plenty of time to worry about that later. And, he sits in your lap in a way that makes you forget what you were even talking about.
“If they didn’t let me have you, I think I would just kidnap you,” you say while trying to memorize the curve of his pinky finger.
He laughs, “Selfish.”
*brittannnnyyyyyyyy. :(
{ Sungmin meets Ryeowook in the schoolyard. AU. }
for remixied who is the g to my sparrow. *_*
television static
You meet Ryeowook for the first time when you’re in fifth grade and everything is losing its meaning. Ryeowook has such kind eyes that you offer to share your cookie and maybe your heart too. The boy giggles, small hands coming up to cover his pretty white teeth, and the cookie crumbles a little in your hand.
“What’s your name?”
Your swings create the same noise and lunch lays forgotten between your legs.
“Kim Ryeowook.”
“I’m Lee Sungmin.”
Ryeowook smiles shyly and you allow your hand to fall to your side, a little bit closer to the other swing, a little bit closer to Ryeowook.
-
The teacher drones on and on about variables and exponents, and you might as well be dreaming. You watch Ryeowook frown in concentration, little hand writing as fast as it can, and you sigh. You feel a tap on your shoulder and look around to see a pretty girl smiling widely.
“Hi, I forgot my pencil. Can I borrow yours?”
You smile back because this is eighth grade and boys are allowed to like girls now.
“Sure,” you say, handing her a pencil and letting your fingers linger for just a little while.
Her smile picks up at the ends and she giggles a little when you turn around. You are feeling quite elated but then you catch the edge of Ryeowook’s glare and it burns. Your smirk falters and diffuses as Ryeowook goes back to taking notes, quicker this time. You don’t know why but the utter sadness of Ryeowook’s eyes makes you feel like shit.
The girl gives you her number and you crumble up the paper as soon as she leaves. You plaster on a fake grin and swing an arm around Ryeowook’s slender frame.
“Want to go get ice cream?” you ask, hoping for your cheery voice to not waver.
Ryeowook bites his lower lips and says, “Aren’t we sort of old to get excited over this?”
You laugh, “You can never be too old for ice cream, silly. Let’s go.”
You marvel for only little while over how perfectly his hand fits together with yours.
-
You’re five months away from graduation when your mother tells you to stop hanging out with Ryeowook.
“People are starting to talk,” she whispers, glancing worriedly out the window as if society is just outside, all ready with clipboards and microscopes.
“About what?”
Her eyes are dim and her voice is dangerously low when she says, “About you two, together.”
You laugh just so you won’t cry and you wink, “Come on, Mom. You can’t seriously think we’re… you know.”
She sighs and brings her hands up to cover her face like she just can’t bear to look at you.
“Please stop before you kill me, Sungmin.”
Your laughter tastes bitter.
-
It’s strange, this thing that’s happening, and Ryeowook prays and prays for it all to stop. You watch from the sideline, from where you always are, and smile. Ryeowook always looks beautiful when he’s bleeding. Always.
-
As much as they say, no one really believes in God, because they have had countless prayers unanswered and many wishes forgotten. But, they still put on a nice smile, a nicer suit, and bring their family to the church. They stand under the scrutiny of society and they crack under pressure and sing the hymns perfectly.
“But, I really do believe in God,” Ryeowook says, dripping with innocence and fragile hopes. You don’t have the heart to taint such pureness, so you simply smile.
“Let’s go get something to eat.”
Ryeowook’s fingers brush against your knuckles as you both reach for the door at once. Ryeowook laughs it off, eyes crinkling delightfully as if it’s some sort of joke the way you’re watching him. Your lips slant a little and Ryeowook quickly grabs onto the ends and takes it as a smile.
You worry too much, you thinks as Ryeowook makes stupid jokes all the way to the ice cream shop, glancing every so often to make sure you are still listening.
I just wish you-
“We’re here!” Ryeowook swings open the door and in the next second, his face is glued to the clear plastic and his eyes are practically eating the ice cream. He points at the mango flavored ice cream, his finger bending at an almost grotesque angle, and says, “Sungmin, want to try that one with me?”
You nod, pretending to be very excited and muttering about how wonderful mangoes taste, and Ryeowook is fooled. Just like that.
-
He shouldn’t know these things, you think as he explains how self absorbed men make bad lovers. He should be innocent and ask you why something hard is rubbing against his thigh. That’s how it’s supposed to be, but he’s already kissing the inside of your knee and your foot is on his back.
He moves up ever so softly like he’s afraid you might not know how this goes.
You pull his face forward until he’s forced to moan into your lips, until he’s forced to say your name with such angelic pauses. This is wrong, you think when he looks horny and is yanking at your boxers. This is right, you think when he’s saying he loves you.
Selfish, he mutters under you and you laugh onto his spine.
-
“We can’t see each other anymore.”
Ryeowook’s fingers curl around the grass under him and he tries to snort, “You’re kidding, right?”
People break friendships all the time, it’s nothing out of the ordinary, so you don’t understand why Ryeowook is crying like it’s the end of the world.
You grind your teeth together, “Fuck it.”
You leave, carrying with you the permanent image of Ryeowook’s tears just about to spill and his heart cracking, breaking, and shattering until the aftermath ripples through your very bones.
-
Your mother pats your back and says thank you a thousand times until you try to escape by slipping under the trees. You climb walls and break telephone booths, but Ryeowook’s face remains etched all pretty and permanent right under your skin. And, it’s only when you’re cutting at something soft and oddly warm that you realize you’re dreaming.
-
Ryeowook doesn’t come to school some days and on those days you like to go down by the river and think of how the sunshine always liked his face better, his smile better. You had been jealous at those times when it seemed like everything was spinning just to keep Ryeowook smiling. And, now you’d do anything to see that smile.
It’s cloudy all of a sudden and you can almost hear Ryeowook. Selfish.
-
You’re standing in front of him and you wonder if you’re shaking as badly as you think you are. His eyes see you for a second but then he settles for the wall behind you.
“Um.” You wonder when your voice got so squeaky.
“What is it?”
“I love you.”
Shit, fuck, oh, dammit. That wasn’t what you meant to say. This isn’t how it was supposed to go. You came here to tell him you’re sorry but this is the end. That’s what you were supposed to say. This is the end. But, right now, he’s moving towards you and his hands are all over your face.
“I love you too,” he says, laughter in his voice, and you think that maybe this is how it’s supposed to be.
-
You tell your mother to go fuck herself, but in nicer terms and with cute faces. You hold her hand and tell her you can’t stop seeing Ryeowook just because she’s afraid of being treated different by her little clique. You’ve found their little get-togethers distasteful anyway.
She doesn’t cry, but she does tell you you’re going to regret it. They won’t see you the same anywhere, she says, leering in that way mothers’ can.
You hold her face and tell her you don’t give a shit.
She doesn’t talk to you for a month.
-
Ryeowook says he hasn’t told his parents yet and maybe he never will. You ask him what he’s going to do when they want him to get married and have pretty grandchildren. He says there’s plenty of time to worry about that later. And, he sits in your lap in a way that makes you forget what you were even talking about.
“If they didn’t let me have you, I think I would just kidnap you,” you say while trying to memorize the curve of his pinky finger.
He laughs, “Selfish.”
*brittannnnyyyyyyyy. :(