Dawn of the Almost Dead
Don't you hate it when someone close to you get's in over their head, and you get nominated to bail them out. It's 5:45AM and I have yet to sleep. I got cornered into writing a paper for my girlfriend and it took me all night. I opposed, argued, pleaded, but in the end she won... I'm such a bitch. Anyway, since it's early morning, it's the perfect time to tell you about the problem I've been having with old people. Someone's going to hate me after this. Let me start by saying this... I am not a morning person. I hate waking up late and having to jump out of bed, into my clothes, and out the door before I have time for coffee, but every morning... It happens. (not today.. haha)These mornings are rough because it means one of two things, I have school or work. My problem isn't with either of those things...It's the drive to and from that are killing me. Is it a long drive? No. Atleast, it wouldn't be if every morning I didn't get stuck behind atleast 4 old people who drive like every day is Sunday...slow. Really slow. So slow in fact that I can almost hear the hiss of their oxygen tank. Ten blocks later I'm trying to devise detours in my mind. All efforts to pass, lose, or reason with these Buick driving road hazards are completely futile. I need to go left..he goes left...I need to go right.. he goes right. Finally, I'll manage some strategic miracle and get around one. Before I hang the next corner, another passes me right in the nick of time. Now, I hate to generalize but, If this was not all old people (really, really, old people) than how could it possibly happen every morning? (unless you live in certain parts of Florida)I have parents, grandparents, and old family members just like most people. I'm a patient guy, but every morning these terrorists are making me late. One of these days I'm gonna go postal on somebody's grandpa ...sorry in advance..