59.
He is nothing like I remember. His confidence, his spark, his being... All of that has been taken right out of him. He wouldn't talk about anything that happened. He wouldn't even respond half the time. I can't even imagine what he went through...
It's worse than anything I've ever been through. It's quite possibly worse than anything that will ever happen to me. Yet he did no complaining. No garnering for pity. I don't know if it's a sign of strength or the result of being completely broken. Either way, I no longer have any right to complain as I do. I never did. Especially since I am not powerless to change things.
I saved lives. Reunited teams. Even if it was only a few out of hundreds or thousands, it made all the difference to some. Me, the pathetic little creature who depended on others for so long just to survive.
I am not what I used to be. I'm strong. I have power. Perhaps not physically, but I make up for that elsewhere. I don't have to depend on others for survival. I don't have to beg for attention and that people won't leave me to die.
...I want to take the newspaper clipping and shout it from the rooftops, "I did this!" It would be terribly unwise, of course. But I want others to acknowledge my strength. Jack knows. If anything should happen, I trust he'll spread the word. That is enough.
I just feel so empowered. Such a wonderful feeling... I'm not going to let it go.
I just wish I'd been strong enough not to cry in front of him. Strong enough to make him happy again. He was my strength for so many years, and now the roles have switched.
---
I'm back. Just in time for tomorrow's class, too. My apologies to anyone who was hoping to miss another week. ♥ Don't worry muns Shocky's not going to be around to post it so at least you guys don't have to sit through one.
I didn't miss anything too exciting, did I? I see we have a few new teachers on board. I suppose I should make up for not being around to properly welcome you to the school. My name is Blacky. I teach Psychology.
It's worse than anything I've ever been through. It's quite possibly worse than anything that will ever happen to me. Yet he did no complaining. No garnering for pity. I don't know if it's a sign of strength or the result of being completely broken. Either way, I no longer have any right to complain as I do. I never did. Especially since I am not powerless to change things.
I saved lives. Reunited teams. Even if it was only a few out of hundreds or thousands, it made all the difference to some. Me, the pathetic little creature who depended on others for so long just to survive.
I am not what I used to be. I'm strong. I have power. Perhaps not physically, but I make up for that elsewhere. I don't have to depend on others for survival. I don't have to beg for attention and that people won't leave me to die.
...I want to take the newspaper clipping and shout it from the rooftops, "I did this!" It would be terribly unwise, of course. But I want others to acknowledge my strength. Jack knows. If anything should happen, I trust he'll spread the word. That is enough.
I just feel so empowered. Such a wonderful feeling... I'm not going to let it go.
I just wish I'd been strong enough not to cry in front of him. Strong enough to make him happy again. He was my strength for so many years, and now the roles have switched.
---
I'm back. Just in time for tomorrow's class, too. My apologies to anyone who was hoping to miss another week. ♥ Don't worry muns Shocky's not going to be around to post it so at least you guys don't have to sit through one.
I didn't miss anything too exciting, did I? I see we have a few new teachers on board. I suppose I should make up for not being around to properly welcome you to the school. My name is Blacky. I teach Psychology.