Dec 30, 2005 20:05
but detachment doesn't mean you don't let the experience penetrate you. on the contrary, you let it penetrate you fully. that's how you are able to leave it.
i'm lost.
take any emotion-love for a woman, or grief for a loved one, or what i'm going through, fear and pain from a deadly illness. if you hold back on the emotions-if you don't allow yourself to go all the way through them-you can never be detached, you're too busy being afraid. you're afraid of the pain, you're afraid of the grief. you're afraid of the vulnerability that loving entails.
but by throwing yourself into these emotions, by allowing yourself to dive in, all the way over your head even, you experience them fully and completely. you know what pain is. you know what love is. you know what grief is. and only then can you say, "all right. i have experienced that emotion. i recognize that emotion. now i need to detach myself from that emotion for a moment."
same for loneliness: you let go,let the tears flow, feel it completely-but eventually be able to say, "all right, that was my moment with loneliness. i'm not afraid of feeling lonely, but now i'm going to put that loneliness aside and know that there are other emotions in the world, and i'm going to experience them as well.
morrie/mitch