Ringing Doorbells & Bony Butts
Ringing Doorbells&Bony Butts
Well, you're pretty sure when you can't feel your legs because some chocolate-filled heavy, scared-out-of-his-fucking-wits Yoochun is tightly curled against you sitting on your lap, effectively blocking your view from watching the movie, Changmin who's on his stomach, one long ass leg jabbing you in your ribs and still gobbling up all the Smarties and Oh Henry bars that you were meant to leave the little kids trick-or-treating, Junsu who's whining about how stupid Britney Snow is in Prom Night while making fun of the easily-terrified Yoochun therefore making him squirm in your lap even more, and an asshole of a leader that leaves you to be condemned in this predicament , that who in the fucking world made up Halloween?
(yes okay maybe you're only pissed off at the fact that you didn't get the chance to dress up as a Ken doll and go trick-or-treating yourself, bringing in a shitload of chocolates&candies more than Yunho ever could have because his costume sucked bullshit while you were crowned (in your imaginary world) year after the year , best dressed)
"Yah~Yoochunah! Don't be such a wussy! It's just a movie!" Junsu laughs, merrily and Yoochun's face contorts of utmost horror when the serial killer begans chasing the crying blond girl.
"RUN , BRITNEY SNOW , RUN!" You groan when Yoochun's bony ass begins bouncing up and down and you're trying to steady the skeleton while peering out from behind him to try and enjoy the goddamn movie that he didn't already see 379492047493 times yet couldn't help getting so overly excited about and -
"NOOOOOOMNNNNFFFFF!"
"OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
"BWUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA"
"THWEH DWOOR!"
You're moan of pain as Yoochun's foot kicks you in the chest when he collapses on the ground as Britney Snow gets caught, his screams of terror being cut off and muffled by his face pressed to the carpet, Junsu's dolphinlaugh of amusement, and Changmin's mouth filled with gooey chocolatey goodness yelling at the door all mixes into a such such such a wonderful symphony of noise (did you note the sarcasm? yeah.) that the people on the other side of the door quite possibly just ran the fuck away.
You nurse your chest, glaring darkly at the bony ass that's staring right at your face as Yoochun sobs ("WAAAAAAAE?! -COUGHCOUGHSNIFFLE- "WAAAAAAAAE?!") and seriously. Wae?
There's still the door ringing and Changmin swallows slowly, "Hyung? Hyung? Hyung? Hy-YOOCHUN SHUT THE FUCK UP!" He takes a pillow and squishes Yoochun's face further into the carpet. "Hyung? Hyung? Hyung? Hyung? Hy-"
Oh my god , you have a headache.
"Hyung? Hyung? Hyung? Hyung?" Junsu's on his back, literally ROFL'ing (rolling on floor laughing fyi.) and that high pitch voice is really grating on your nerves.
"Hyung? Hyung? Hyung? Hyung?" Maybe if you stare at Yoochun's wiggling ass harder, everything will all go away.
"Hyung?" Stare. "Hyung?" Stare. "Hyung?" STARE. STARE. STARE.
The doorbell is still ringing. Yoochun is still crying. Junsu is still laughing. Changmin is still going, "Hyung? Hyung? Hyunghyunghyunghyunghyunghyunghyunghyunghyugnghugyunghyugnunghun-"
"IF I HEAR ANYBODY SPEAK ONE MORE TIME , I SWEAR ON ALL THINGS HOLY , I WILL CUT A BITCH." And for a second , all is quiet.
Yoochun's butt isnt moving, Junsu's mouth is frozen, Changmin's eyes are wide, the doorbell's not ringing and damn. That's better.
You sharply turn your head to the doorbell that just began to ring again and curse under your breath at how insistent these stupid kids are about their goddamn candy. Stomping over there, you grab a handful of random shit (Rockets, Mars, Glosettes, a thimble, an earring, a banana peel, more Rockets and Maynards), open the door and-
"HERE! TAKE IT! NOW GET THE FU- oh." Standing there slightly bewildered, was the leader of Dong Bang Shin Ki, Yunho with a box of what looks to be pie in his hands.
Yunho lifts the box and gives it a little shake, slowly saying, "I. Brought. Pie?"
Thank God you're a quick thinker because before Changmin has the time to run over the two of you like a bulldozer goddamn, you throw the box somewhere on the ground ("BAHAHA - OUCH. what the fuck?") , grab onto Yunho's hands (mm. yes. strong.) , and just run.
You're kinda comfortable. No. Wait. Uncomfortable , yes. Who knew it had already rained and the sidewalk you're sitting with him on is making your butt damp but whatever. Better than staying in that crazy zoo you call home. Besides , you haven't been with him alone for awhile. And maybe-
"So." Yunho says , staring at the asphalt. "We just sit here?"
"You prefer standing?" You retort back, wiggling your toes inside your boots.
He's silent. You're silent. There's the faint sound of children saying , "Trick or treat!"
You look up as Yunho gets up, and wipes his hands on his jeans, smiling at you when he sticks a hand in your face. "Get up."
Cocking an eyebrow , you stare at it. "What."
And he's still smiling , you think you feel your heart just flutter a bit. "Just. Take my hand."
It's weird how perfectly your hand slips in warmly with his.
"This is stupid. We shouldn't." You hear yourself saying as the two of you are in changerooms of a store called 'Les Stylos' which is pretty deceitful since there's nothing les stylish about this place (c? u gewd in engrish :]) "I look like a freak!"
"Jaejoong if you see me , you wouldn't say that. Now get your ass out here, Ken doll." You sigh , shaking your head and pulling the door open.
And for a second , you're a bit scared shitless when you see Yunho clad in this short mini pink dress (woah hairy legs woah), a long blond wig adorning his head, seriously massive pink heels, and prostitute like (aka Barbie) makeup painted all over his face. Then again , life couldn't get any better than this.
Yunho's clinging onto your arm even though he's now about 5 more inches taller than you from before and you're trying to keep yourself poised and masculine (and fuck it all if you mess this up & people still think you wouldn't know masculine if it hit you in the face) even when Barbie!Ho over there trips over his feet several times & brings you crashing down as well.
So you guys finally make it to a house (and okay you're elbow is bleeding & yunho's high heel's straps ripped and he has to stop every 10 seconds to adjust his footing but you made it in one piece right? right.) but when you see just how overgrown you guys are compared to the little munchkins running around giggling and seriously the moment you mistook some kid as a garden gnome & pointed at the little thing , commenting on how ugly it is & how it scares the living shit outta you thus having the kid kick you in the balls (twice today , really. do you have 'kick me' sign anywhere?) , you realize just how stupid this entire plan is.
Then Yunho looks at you with those warm, kind, covered-in-eyeliner&mascaara eyes of his and you take a deep breath, and ring the doorbell.
You don't know what time it is, how many times you both have been laughed at, how many times you both laughed at being laughed at, how much you filledYunho's the dress's bust with chocolates , how you can hardly move your legs without feeling the wrappers of potato chip bags scratching your crotch , how your spray on tan kinda looks like shit, how Yunho stepped on shit, and just how much fucking fun you guys had together on Halloween.
When the two of you get home and Changmin stopped molesting Yunho's breasts and your crotch to steal more Halloween goodies, Junsu and Yoochun fell asleep side by side each other, the television playing Charlie Brown Halloween specials, you and Yunho are in the bathroom removing all your makeup.
There's a comfortable silence between you two and you think your lips may fall off from grinning so hard.
"Thanks." You say , your voice raspy from all the laughing&screaming.
Yunho doesn't look at you and continues wiping off all his foundation but you see him smiling in the mirror's reflection anyways.