fic
Title: Five Four Things That Never Happened to Jim and Pam
Fandom/Pairing: The Office (US), Jim/Pam
Spoilers: various eps from seasons 1 and 2 (sort of)
Summary: Jim and Pam are meant to be.
(Okay, I know it's supposed to be five things, but in the spirit of downsizing…)
1.
Jim buys a new shirt for his interview. He figures it'll bring him luck. Or at least be a white shirt he can wear to interviews.
He shows up on time, but the office is empty except for one exhausted looking guy.
"Toby," the guy says. "HR."
"Jim Halpert. I'm supposed to meet someone named Michael but he doesn't seem to be--"
"Baseball"
"Excuse me?"
"Everyone's at Pitch and Putt," Toby says. "Michael took the whole office there."
"Oh," Jim says. He thinks about saying 'That's nice,' but Toby's tone has made the whole thing sound like having a root canal. "So can I leave a note for Michael or..."
"He took everyone to Pitch and Putt because he found out some of the warehouse guys said he hit like a girl during the company softball game," Toby says.
"Oh," Jim says again. "Really?"
"Yeah."
"Wow. That's...wow. For real?"
Toby nods." It's a shame I couldn't find my car keys, you know?"
"Sounds like. And this trip to--"
"Pitch and Putt."
"Right. Is it like an all-day thing, or if I come back later, could I maybe--you know what, forget I said that. I have a feeling the interview would have been a disaster."
"I'd definitely advise forgetting you've ever heard of Dunder Mifflin," Toby says, and gives Jim a tired grin. "And I promise I won't tell Michael you stopped by."
Jim goes home and watches ESPN for the rest of the day. Someone from Dunder Mifflin, a flat female voice, leaves a message on his machine around five. "This is Pam from Dunder Mifflin, calling to reschedule your interview with Michael Scott. Michael was...out of the office today."
Pam sounds like a zombie, Jim thinks, and deletes the message. His roommate, Mark, agrees that he's definitely missed out on a grade-A shit job.
"Saved by baseball, man," Mark says. "Told you it's the sport of kings. You want a beer?"
A month later, Jim gets a job in Maryland. Moving is a bitch, but soft shell crab *is* his favorite food.
After five years, he has enough time saved up to go to Europe for two weeks.
Two days before he leaves, his dad has a stroke.
Jim ends up moving back home to help out. His mom doesn't say it, but he knows she's glad he's there. He moves back in with Mark, who's just bought a condo and needs help paying the mortgage, and starts looking for a job.
After one particularly crappy interview with Lackawanna county, for a job that involves ordering office supplies, he goes to Chili's for a drink. He knew he shouldn't have worn his white shirt.
There's a party in the back, some guy handing out awards ("And this is the Busiest Beaver award!") and making an ass out of himself.
He's almost done with his beer when someone sits down next to him at the bar.
"Hi," she says. "Buy me a drink?" She's cheerfully drunk, and has the prettiest smile he's ever seen.
"Sure."
"Office party nightmare," she says when her drink comes. "I just got an award for 'best divorce.'"
"Sorry."
"About the award or the divorce?"
"Both?"
She laughs. "The divorce was a good thing. The award--well, it's better than the ones I used to get."
"Did I just hear someone win 'The Spicy Curry Award?'"
"Yep."
"Do I want to know what that's about?"
"You're not nearly drunk enough." She smiles at him again, and he has to know her name.
"I'm Jim," he says.
"Pam," she says. "I think I'm going to pretend I've forgotten about the party. Is it okay if I stay here for a while? "
"Absolutely," Jim says.
The white shirt ends up being lucky after all.
2.
Pam knew the whole cameras-in-the-office thing was going to be a disaster.
She just didn't know she'd end up getting fired in front of them.
She'd thought, for a second, that Michael was going to say he was kidding in his horrible "I'm funny!" way that always ended with her laughing weakly at his so-called joke and telling Jim everything as
soon as she got a chance.
And maybe Michael was kidding, but it was the first day the cameras were there, and apparently he really wanted to look like the kind of boss who could make decisions and do actual work.
And fire people.
She wished the crew had shown up last week, when he walked around all day with toilet paper stuck to his shoe.
Used toilet paper.
Everyone's really nice when she's cleaning out her desk. Phyllis brings her tissues. Kevin offers her M&Ms. Dwight offers to call every week and let her know what's going on.
"I promise I won't mention whoever Michael hires to replace you," he says.
"Thanks, Dwight," she says, and considers throwing her stapler at him.
"Hey Dwight, one of your bobbleheads is broken or something," Jim says, and Dwight turns around, panicked and lunging for his desk.
"Glued its head down," Jim tells her, leaning over her desk. "Are you okay?"
She can't believe she got fired.
She can't believe she won't see Jim anymore.
"It's just so weird," she says.
"Pam, it sucks. Michael sucks. Firing you was so wrong and I can't believe I'm not going to se--" He breaks off when her phone rings.
I don't have to get it, she wants to say. But she doesn't.
And so she answers the phone.
It's Roy. They're in the middle of getting a shipment ready, but Darryl's letting him take an hour to drive her home. He tells her to be sure not to forget anything. He says, "What'd you do, anyway?" and then, "You know what, it doesn't matter. We've still got my paycheck and receptionist jobs are easy enough to get, right?"
She knows he's just thinking about saving for a house. She does. She just wishes he'd said, Are you okay?
Michael comes out when she's got her stuff packed up. He gives her a gift certificate to Chili's and says he hopes they can still be friends. She stuffs the gift certificate in the box and waves good-bye to everyone.
The cameras follow her out into the hallway. She isn't going to cry again. She isn't. She looks at the elevator, and then takes the stairs. Goodbye, Dunder Mifflin.
Jim catches her right before she goes outside.
"Pam," he says. "Pam, wait. I--I just--"
I'm never going to see you again, she thinks. "I love the way you say my name."
"Pam," he says again, and then he kisses her.
When the documentary finally comes out, Michael's commentary on the moment is, "And to think that kiss happened because of me. Pam and Jim, if you're watching, yes I will make a toast at your wedding, which I hear is coming up soon."
Of course Michael isn't invited to the wedding.
Of course he shows up anyway.
3.
Jim hasn't seen Katy in a while, but he calls and asks her to go on the booze cruise.
"I'd totally love it," she says. "The only thing is, can you come pick me up? I'm so close to making a really big sale at this nail place, only the girl I've been talking to doesn't get off till five. You know Crystal Nails right by the Wal-Mart?"
"Strangely enough, I don't," he says. "Promise you won't hold it against me."
Pause. Pause. Pause.
She laughs. "You're so funny," she says. "Just so totally funny."
And that's why he'd stopped calling Katy. She's fun, and he likes her, but she doesn't say things like, "You don't know where Crystal Nails is? Jim, how can you call yourself an American?"
That's what Pam says when he asks her how to get there.
Katy is waiting for him in the parking lot, and when he pops the trunk for her he notices she's carrying a small Wal-Mart bag, clutching it against the case she carries her purses in.
"Nice bag," he says, and fingers the edge of it. There's something inside. "Kind of a departure for you, but I think it works. It really says 'Corporate America, I love you.'"
"I think I'm pregnant," she says.
Guess who doesn't go on the booze cruise?
He spends most of the night at Katy's apartment, talking to her. She's taken two pregnancy tests. One was positive. One was negative. Her period is a week late.
He learns her period is never late. He learns that when she's worried, she tucks her hair behind her ears over and over again.
He tells her everything will be fine. He says he'll be there for her, that they'll get through whatever happens. He feels okay when he leaves. Kind of brave, even.
Then he goes home and drinks six beers in a row, lining up the empty cans on the floor. He wakes up with a headache and a tongue that feels like it's sprouted fur.
He calls Katy before he leaves for work. She isn't awake yet and her voice is sleep-thick.
"I'll call you," he says, because he has no idea what to say. "I mean, I'll call you later. I mean--you know I'll call, right?"
At work, he finds out Michael managed to get Dunder Mifflin banned from all Lake Wallenpaupack cruises. Also, Dwight thinks he spent the whole night steering the ship.
"He doesn't," he says to Pam, who nods.
"He does. It was the best thing. Actually, it was the only even sort of funny thing."
"Come on, Michael, a lake, free booze -- what could possibly go wrong? Seriously, didn't you and Roy have fun?"
"Roy did," she said, and then makes a face, like she's said something she shouldn't. "I mean...I just mean there were these things, snorkel shots, and he did some of them. And then I got him to come up on the deck with me and he got, um, seasick and it was just, you know. Where were you?"
"With Katy," he says and she looks down at her desk. "She--"
"I have some faxes I have to send," Pam says.
She doesn't talk to him for the rest of the day. He calls Katy twice. No news yet. They make plans to go out and while they're eating dinner he thinks, this could be my life.
It's kind of a depressing thought.
He calls Katy four times at work the next day to make up for it.
"So it's serious?" Pam says. "With you and Katy, I mean."
"I don't know. Maybe."
"Jim, is something--"
His phone rings.
"I have to get this," he says.
It's Katy. Pam turns away fast, and he hears the cameras clicking as they zoom in on her face.
Katy wants him to come over to her place after work. He stops at the grocery store on the way there and walks around in a daze, picking up and putting down the same bouquet of flowers four times.
He knows Katy is going to tell him something. He could hear it in her voice. He pays for the flowers and drives to her apartment.
She isn't pregnant. She got her period right before she called him.
"But sometimes don't women still get their period or something?" he says.
"I took another test too," she says. "No baby."
"I--are you okay? Can I get you anything?"
She touches the flowers he's given her. "Jim, this whole thing….it's made me think, you know? About what I want and everything and well, you're sweet and I like you, but you aren't--we're just not right. Together, I mean."
"Oh," he says.
"I just think that life is--this is it, you know? The only shot we get. And I just want...I want to be with someone who really gets me. Do you know what I mean?"
"Yeah," he says. "I think I do."
He doesn't sleep at all that night. In the morning he gets up and goes to work. He still has the card he didn't give Pam at Christmas, and when he gets in, he leaves it on her desk.
When she picks it up, he goes and sits on the roof.
"You found me," he says when she shows up, hair blowing in the wind. "Pam, I--"
"Me too," she says, and puts her hands on his shoulders. Her fingers are so cold he can feel them through his shirt. Her engagement ring is gone.
He pulls her close, and her smile is all he can see.
4.
Roy's the one who tells her.
They're in the restaurant parking lot after the rehearsal dinner and Pam is trying to get a rock out of her shoe.
"Got it," she says, and dumps a pebble out of her new black pumps.
"That's good," Roy says, already taking off his tie. "You sure you don't want to stay with your mom at the motel?"
"I can't. My aunt Shelly and her kids are staying with her." Pam wanted to stay with her mom. She wanted to talk about the wedding, wanted to hear that she'd look beautiful. That everything would be fine. But Shelly's husband just left her, and she has no money and three teenagers, and Pam knows Shelly needs her mom more than she does.
"I could ask my folks about getting you a room. Then your mom could come see you and you two could talk."
"Roy, I already know you're having a bachelor party," she says, and leans against him, sliding her shoe back on. "We work at the same place, remember?"
"Oh, man, did--"
"No, Michael doesn't know."
"That's good, 'cause otherwise you'd be spending our honeymoon sleeping in the car," he says, and then smiles to show he's kidding. "Hey, speaking of that, since Halpert isn't coming tonight, remind me to thank him tomorrow."
"You invited Jim to your bachelor party?"
"Sure. Jim, the fat guy, the old guy, Oscar, Stanley, and the temp. All the office guys that come have to chip in twenty for the keg. Darryl figured it was a good way to get the beer and make some money."
"But he's not coming?"
Roy shakes his head. "Nah. I'm gonna catch a ride with my brother, so you take the truck." He winks at her. "Don't wait up."
"Funny." She punches his arm, and he grins and kisses her.
"Okay, I really gotta go."
"Okay." She watches him start to walk away. "Roy?"
"Yeah?" He looks back, his shadow falling over her.
"How come you have to thank Jim?"
"For your leave time, duh," he says. "How else do you think you got a week off for the honeymoon? Michael?"
"Jim gave me his vacation?" She is holding the keys so tightly her hand hurts.
"Yeah, since he's leaving and all, he just had to fill out some form to donate it to you. The HR guy, what's-his-name, told me this afternoon. I was going to say something but then Michael wanted to practice his reception toast and you remember how that went."
"I remember," she says, and watches Roy turn away.
When she gets in the truck, her hands are shaking so hard it takes her three tries to start it.
The lights are on in the office, and the cleaning crew lets her in. Everything looks dimmer at night, smaller. She gets Michael's spare key out of her desk drawer and unlocks his office.
On Michael's desk, tucked under the stack of time cards she left with a note reminding him to sign them today, is a letter. A resignation letter.
Jim is leaving Dunder Mifflin. He says he has an opportunity that he can't turn down. He says his leave donation paperwork is attached and that he's sure he wants to donate to her. He says he'll miss the office.
His last day is the day before she comes back to work.
She sits down in Michael's chair and reads the letter again.
Then she drives home.
Her wedding gown is already laid out, stretched across the dining room table Roy's grandmother left them when she passed away and that they don't really have room for. She unzips the dress bag and touches the fabric, draping the white satin over her hand and sliding her finger into the sharp scratchiness of the tulle.
There's a box in the hall closet. She keeps all her art stuff there, along with the bridal magazines she bought the first year she was engaged. Roy calls it her "junk dump" and asks when she's going to throw everything out whenever she reminds him that towels belong on the towel rack, not the floor.
Inside the box is everything Jim has ever given her. A Valentine's card with a picture of Dwight's head glued on it. A candy cane. A bag of french onion chips. The paper airplanes they made out of Dunder Mifflin stationary and tried to land on Dwight's car from the roof. A pencil from the time they played mini-golf. A napkin from the burger place where they first went to lunch together. A photo Phyllis took the time Michael threw an office St. Patrick's party, her and Jim laughing at Dwight right after he'd said, "Anyone else pinches me, this entire office will be punished." The card he'd mailed her the time she was out for a week with the flu.
I know it says Happy Birthday, but this was all the drugstore had. So much for being able to say everything with Hallmark. Hope you're feeling better. I miss you.
Outside it's hot and clear, a perfect summer night. Her heels make a sharp ticking noise as she walks.
After a while, she takes them off.
There are lights on in Jim's house. She stands outside and looks at them. Light on in the living room. In the kitchen. In Jim's room. She puts her shoes back on.
The doorbell sounds incredibly loud when she rings it.
"Pam?" Jim says when he opens the door. He is wearing jeans and a t-shirt, no shoes. "It's...wow, it's late. Aren't you--isn't tonight the rehearsal dinner?"
"Yes," she says. "We had chicken."
"Oh. That sounds nice. Did you--is that box for me?"
She shakes her head.
"Oh," he says again. "Then why--what are you--where's your car?"
"I walked." She lifts up one foot, sliding her shoe off so it dangles from her toes. "See? Blisters."
"Do you…." He clears his throat. "Do you need a band-aid?"
She laughs, or thinks she does. It sounds more like she's crying. "Why did you give me your vacation?"
"What?"
"I was at the office. I saw your letter. Why didn't you tell me you're leaving?"
He licks his lips. "I was going to tell you but I just..." He trails off, shoving his hands in his pockets. "You're getting married."
"You were just going to leave. I was just going to get back and never see you again."
"I didn't want--you're getting married."
"You already said that."
He flinches like she's hit him. "I don't…I have to. Pam, I have to."
She knows what he means. She knows what he means whenever he says her name.
She's always known it.
She thinks about her wedding dress, and how easy it was to wait for it. To walk away from it.
"This is my box," she says, and opens it. Watches his face when he looks inside.
"Pam, I--"
"Ask me," she says, her voice fierce.
He takes a step toward her, then back. He's shaking so hard she can see it. "What?"
"Ask me. You have to take a chance on something sometime, Jim. Remember?"
He opens his mouth, then closes it. He licks his lips. He stares at her. She lets herself look. Lets herself see him. Lets him see her.
"Come with me," he says. "Now. Tonight."
"Yes," she says, and steps inside his house. Steps toward him. "Yes."
They leave before the sun comes up. The only thing they take with them is his car, and her box.
Fandom/Pairing: The Office (US), Jim/Pam
Spoilers: various eps from seasons 1 and 2 (sort of)
Summary: Jim and Pam are meant to be.
(Okay, I know it's supposed to be five things, but in the spirit of downsizing…)
1.
Jim buys a new shirt for his interview. He figures it'll bring him luck. Or at least be a white shirt he can wear to interviews.
He shows up on time, but the office is empty except for one exhausted looking guy.
"Toby," the guy says. "HR."
"Jim Halpert. I'm supposed to meet someone named Michael but he doesn't seem to be--"
"Baseball"
"Excuse me?"
"Everyone's at Pitch and Putt," Toby says. "Michael took the whole office there."
"Oh," Jim says. He thinks about saying 'That's nice,' but Toby's tone has made the whole thing sound like having a root canal. "So can I leave a note for Michael or..."
"He took everyone to Pitch and Putt because he found out some of the warehouse guys said he hit like a girl during the company softball game," Toby says.
"Oh," Jim says again. "Really?"
"Yeah."
"Wow. That's...wow. For real?"
Toby nods." It's a shame I couldn't find my car keys, you know?"
"Sounds like. And this trip to--"
"Pitch and Putt."
"Right. Is it like an all-day thing, or if I come back later, could I maybe--you know what, forget I said that. I have a feeling the interview would have been a disaster."
"I'd definitely advise forgetting you've ever heard of Dunder Mifflin," Toby says, and gives Jim a tired grin. "And I promise I won't tell Michael you stopped by."
Jim goes home and watches ESPN for the rest of the day. Someone from Dunder Mifflin, a flat female voice, leaves a message on his machine around five. "This is Pam from Dunder Mifflin, calling to reschedule your interview with Michael Scott. Michael was...out of the office today."
Pam sounds like a zombie, Jim thinks, and deletes the message. His roommate, Mark, agrees that he's definitely missed out on a grade-A shit job.
"Saved by baseball, man," Mark says. "Told you it's the sport of kings. You want a beer?"
A month later, Jim gets a job in Maryland. Moving is a bitch, but soft shell crab *is* his favorite food.
After five years, he has enough time saved up to go to Europe for two weeks.
Two days before he leaves, his dad has a stroke.
Jim ends up moving back home to help out. His mom doesn't say it, but he knows she's glad he's there. He moves back in with Mark, who's just bought a condo and needs help paying the mortgage, and starts looking for a job.
After one particularly crappy interview with Lackawanna county, for a job that involves ordering office supplies, he goes to Chili's for a drink. He knew he shouldn't have worn his white shirt.
There's a party in the back, some guy handing out awards ("And this is the Busiest Beaver award!") and making an ass out of himself.
He's almost done with his beer when someone sits down next to him at the bar.
"Hi," she says. "Buy me a drink?" She's cheerfully drunk, and has the prettiest smile he's ever seen.
"Sure."
"Office party nightmare," she says when her drink comes. "I just got an award for 'best divorce.'"
"Sorry."
"About the award or the divorce?"
"Both?"
She laughs. "The divorce was a good thing. The award--well, it's better than the ones I used to get."
"Did I just hear someone win 'The Spicy Curry Award?'"
"Yep."
"Do I want to know what that's about?"
"You're not nearly drunk enough." She smiles at him again, and he has to know her name.
"I'm Jim," he says.
"Pam," she says. "I think I'm going to pretend I've forgotten about the party. Is it okay if I stay here for a while? "
"Absolutely," Jim says.
The white shirt ends up being lucky after all.
2.
Pam knew the whole cameras-in-the-office thing was going to be a disaster.
She just didn't know she'd end up getting fired in front of them.
She'd thought, for a second, that Michael was going to say he was kidding in his horrible "I'm funny!" way that always ended with her laughing weakly at his so-called joke and telling Jim everything as
soon as she got a chance.
And maybe Michael was kidding, but it was the first day the cameras were there, and apparently he really wanted to look like the kind of boss who could make decisions and do actual work.
And fire people.
She wished the crew had shown up last week, when he walked around all day with toilet paper stuck to his shoe.
Used toilet paper.
Everyone's really nice when she's cleaning out her desk. Phyllis brings her tissues. Kevin offers her M&Ms. Dwight offers to call every week and let her know what's going on.
"I promise I won't mention whoever Michael hires to replace you," he says.
"Thanks, Dwight," she says, and considers throwing her stapler at him.
"Hey Dwight, one of your bobbleheads is broken or something," Jim says, and Dwight turns around, panicked and lunging for his desk.
"Glued its head down," Jim tells her, leaning over her desk. "Are you okay?"
She can't believe she got fired.
She can't believe she won't see Jim anymore.
"It's just so weird," she says.
"Pam, it sucks. Michael sucks. Firing you was so wrong and I can't believe I'm not going to se--" He breaks off when her phone rings.
I don't have to get it, she wants to say. But she doesn't.
And so she answers the phone.
It's Roy. They're in the middle of getting a shipment ready, but Darryl's letting him take an hour to drive her home. He tells her to be sure not to forget anything. He says, "What'd you do, anyway?" and then, "You know what, it doesn't matter. We've still got my paycheck and receptionist jobs are easy enough to get, right?"
She knows he's just thinking about saving for a house. She does. She just wishes he'd said, Are you okay?
Michael comes out when she's got her stuff packed up. He gives her a gift certificate to Chili's and says he hopes they can still be friends. She stuffs the gift certificate in the box and waves good-bye to everyone.
The cameras follow her out into the hallway. She isn't going to cry again. She isn't. She looks at the elevator, and then takes the stairs. Goodbye, Dunder Mifflin.
Jim catches her right before she goes outside.
"Pam," he says. "Pam, wait. I--I just--"
I'm never going to see you again, she thinks. "I love the way you say my name."
"Pam," he says again, and then he kisses her.
When the documentary finally comes out, Michael's commentary on the moment is, "And to think that kiss happened because of me. Pam and Jim, if you're watching, yes I will make a toast at your wedding, which I hear is coming up soon."
Of course Michael isn't invited to the wedding.
Of course he shows up anyway.
3.
Jim hasn't seen Katy in a while, but he calls and asks her to go on the booze cruise.
"I'd totally love it," she says. "The only thing is, can you come pick me up? I'm so close to making a really big sale at this nail place, only the girl I've been talking to doesn't get off till five. You know Crystal Nails right by the Wal-Mart?"
"Strangely enough, I don't," he says. "Promise you won't hold it against me."
Pause. Pause. Pause.
She laughs. "You're so funny," she says. "Just so totally funny."
And that's why he'd stopped calling Katy. She's fun, and he likes her, but she doesn't say things like, "You don't know where Crystal Nails is? Jim, how can you call yourself an American?"
That's what Pam says when he asks her how to get there.
Katy is waiting for him in the parking lot, and when he pops the trunk for her he notices she's carrying a small Wal-Mart bag, clutching it against the case she carries her purses in.
"Nice bag," he says, and fingers the edge of it. There's something inside. "Kind of a departure for you, but I think it works. It really says 'Corporate America, I love you.'"
"I think I'm pregnant," she says.
Guess who doesn't go on the booze cruise?
He spends most of the night at Katy's apartment, talking to her. She's taken two pregnancy tests. One was positive. One was negative. Her period is a week late.
He learns her period is never late. He learns that when she's worried, she tucks her hair behind her ears over and over again.
He tells her everything will be fine. He says he'll be there for her, that they'll get through whatever happens. He feels okay when he leaves. Kind of brave, even.
Then he goes home and drinks six beers in a row, lining up the empty cans on the floor. He wakes up with a headache and a tongue that feels like it's sprouted fur.
He calls Katy before he leaves for work. She isn't awake yet and her voice is sleep-thick.
"I'll call you," he says, because he has no idea what to say. "I mean, I'll call you later. I mean--you know I'll call, right?"
At work, he finds out Michael managed to get Dunder Mifflin banned from all Lake Wallenpaupack cruises. Also, Dwight thinks he spent the whole night steering the ship.
"He doesn't," he says to Pam, who nods.
"He does. It was the best thing. Actually, it was the only even sort of funny thing."
"Come on, Michael, a lake, free booze -- what could possibly go wrong? Seriously, didn't you and Roy have fun?"
"Roy did," she said, and then makes a face, like she's said something she shouldn't. "I mean...I just mean there were these things, snorkel shots, and he did some of them. And then I got him to come up on the deck with me and he got, um, seasick and it was just, you know. Where were you?"
"With Katy," he says and she looks down at her desk. "She--"
"I have some faxes I have to send," Pam says.
She doesn't talk to him for the rest of the day. He calls Katy twice. No news yet. They make plans to go out and while they're eating dinner he thinks, this could be my life.
It's kind of a depressing thought.
He calls Katy four times at work the next day to make up for it.
"So it's serious?" Pam says. "With you and Katy, I mean."
"I don't know. Maybe."
"Jim, is something--"
His phone rings.
"I have to get this," he says.
It's Katy. Pam turns away fast, and he hears the cameras clicking as they zoom in on her face.
Katy wants him to come over to her place after work. He stops at the grocery store on the way there and walks around in a daze, picking up and putting down the same bouquet of flowers four times.
He knows Katy is going to tell him something. He could hear it in her voice. He pays for the flowers and drives to her apartment.
She isn't pregnant. She got her period right before she called him.
"But sometimes don't women still get their period or something?" he says.
"I took another test too," she says. "No baby."
"I--are you okay? Can I get you anything?"
She touches the flowers he's given her. "Jim, this whole thing….it's made me think, you know? About what I want and everything and well, you're sweet and I like you, but you aren't--we're just not right. Together, I mean."
"Oh," he says.
"I just think that life is--this is it, you know? The only shot we get. And I just want...I want to be with someone who really gets me. Do you know what I mean?"
"Yeah," he says. "I think I do."
He doesn't sleep at all that night. In the morning he gets up and goes to work. He still has the card he didn't give Pam at Christmas, and when he gets in, he leaves it on her desk.
When she picks it up, he goes and sits on the roof.
"You found me," he says when she shows up, hair blowing in the wind. "Pam, I--"
"Me too," she says, and puts her hands on his shoulders. Her fingers are so cold he can feel them through his shirt. Her engagement ring is gone.
He pulls her close, and her smile is all he can see.
4.
Roy's the one who tells her.
They're in the restaurant parking lot after the rehearsal dinner and Pam is trying to get a rock out of her shoe.
"Got it," she says, and dumps a pebble out of her new black pumps.
"That's good," Roy says, already taking off his tie. "You sure you don't want to stay with your mom at the motel?"
"I can't. My aunt Shelly and her kids are staying with her." Pam wanted to stay with her mom. She wanted to talk about the wedding, wanted to hear that she'd look beautiful. That everything would be fine. But Shelly's husband just left her, and she has no money and three teenagers, and Pam knows Shelly needs her mom more than she does.
"I could ask my folks about getting you a room. Then your mom could come see you and you two could talk."
"Roy, I already know you're having a bachelor party," she says, and leans against him, sliding her shoe back on. "We work at the same place, remember?"
"Oh, man, did--"
"No, Michael doesn't know."
"That's good, 'cause otherwise you'd be spending our honeymoon sleeping in the car," he says, and then smiles to show he's kidding. "Hey, speaking of that, since Halpert isn't coming tonight, remind me to thank him tomorrow."
"You invited Jim to your bachelor party?"
"Sure. Jim, the fat guy, the old guy, Oscar, Stanley, and the temp. All the office guys that come have to chip in twenty for the keg. Darryl figured it was a good way to get the beer and make some money."
"But he's not coming?"
Roy shakes his head. "Nah. I'm gonna catch a ride with my brother, so you take the truck." He winks at her. "Don't wait up."
"Funny." She punches his arm, and he grins and kisses her.
"Okay, I really gotta go."
"Okay." She watches him start to walk away. "Roy?"
"Yeah?" He looks back, his shadow falling over her.
"How come you have to thank Jim?"
"For your leave time, duh," he says. "How else do you think you got a week off for the honeymoon? Michael?"
"Jim gave me his vacation?" She is holding the keys so tightly her hand hurts.
"Yeah, since he's leaving and all, he just had to fill out some form to donate it to you. The HR guy, what's-his-name, told me this afternoon. I was going to say something but then Michael wanted to practice his reception toast and you remember how that went."
"I remember," she says, and watches Roy turn away.
When she gets in the truck, her hands are shaking so hard it takes her three tries to start it.
The lights are on in the office, and the cleaning crew lets her in. Everything looks dimmer at night, smaller. She gets Michael's spare key out of her desk drawer and unlocks his office.
On Michael's desk, tucked under the stack of time cards she left with a note reminding him to sign them today, is a letter. A resignation letter.
Jim is leaving Dunder Mifflin. He says he has an opportunity that he can't turn down. He says his leave donation paperwork is attached and that he's sure he wants to donate to her. He says he'll miss the office.
His last day is the day before she comes back to work.
She sits down in Michael's chair and reads the letter again.
Then she drives home.
Her wedding gown is already laid out, stretched across the dining room table Roy's grandmother left them when she passed away and that they don't really have room for. She unzips the dress bag and touches the fabric, draping the white satin over her hand and sliding her finger into the sharp scratchiness of the tulle.
There's a box in the hall closet. She keeps all her art stuff there, along with the bridal magazines she bought the first year she was engaged. Roy calls it her "junk dump" and asks when she's going to throw everything out whenever she reminds him that towels belong on the towel rack, not the floor.
Inside the box is everything Jim has ever given her. A Valentine's card with a picture of Dwight's head glued on it. A candy cane. A bag of french onion chips. The paper airplanes they made out of Dunder Mifflin stationary and tried to land on Dwight's car from the roof. A pencil from the time they played mini-golf. A napkin from the burger place where they first went to lunch together. A photo Phyllis took the time Michael threw an office St. Patrick's party, her and Jim laughing at Dwight right after he'd said, "Anyone else pinches me, this entire office will be punished." The card he'd mailed her the time she was out for a week with the flu.
I know it says Happy Birthday, but this was all the drugstore had. So much for being able to say everything with Hallmark. Hope you're feeling better. I miss you.
Outside it's hot and clear, a perfect summer night. Her heels make a sharp ticking noise as she walks.
After a while, she takes them off.
There are lights on in Jim's house. She stands outside and looks at them. Light on in the living room. In the kitchen. In Jim's room. She puts her shoes back on.
The doorbell sounds incredibly loud when she rings it.
"Pam?" Jim says when he opens the door. He is wearing jeans and a t-shirt, no shoes. "It's...wow, it's late. Aren't you--isn't tonight the rehearsal dinner?"
"Yes," she says. "We had chicken."
"Oh. That sounds nice. Did you--is that box for me?"
She shakes her head.
"Oh," he says again. "Then why--what are you--where's your car?"
"I walked." She lifts up one foot, sliding her shoe off so it dangles from her toes. "See? Blisters."
"Do you…." He clears his throat. "Do you need a band-aid?"
She laughs, or thinks she does. It sounds more like she's crying. "Why did you give me your vacation?"
"What?"
"I was at the office. I saw your letter. Why didn't you tell me you're leaving?"
He licks his lips. "I was going to tell you but I just..." He trails off, shoving his hands in his pockets. "You're getting married."
"You were just going to leave. I was just going to get back and never see you again."
"I didn't want--you're getting married."
"You already said that."
He flinches like she's hit him. "I don't…I have to. Pam, I have to."
She knows what he means. She knows what he means whenever he says her name.
She's always known it.
She thinks about her wedding dress, and how easy it was to wait for it. To walk away from it.
"This is my box," she says, and opens it. Watches his face when he looks inside.
"Pam, I--"
"Ask me," she says, her voice fierce.
He takes a step toward her, then back. He's shaking so hard she can see it. "What?"
"Ask me. You have to take a chance on something sometime, Jim. Remember?"
He opens his mouth, then closes it. He licks his lips. He stares at her. She lets herself look. Lets herself see him. Lets him see her.
"Come with me," he says. "Now. Tonight."
"Yes," she says, and steps inside his house. Steps toward him. "Yes."
They leave before the sun comes up. The only thing they take with them is his car, and her box.