Goodbye Aaron
I decided to write a goodbye letter to Aaron and have send it to his skype, and this was what I wrote.
Dear Aaron,
I decided to write you this as a goodbye letter. I don't know if I'll ever be able to talk to you the same way we used to talk. When we first met, everything was fine, but after your relationships and whatnots, don't you see that our friendship change? I admit, you helped me a lot through my relationship with Minho/Henry, but I helped you a lot too. And I never complained about it. All I ever complained about was the way you treated me like trash and shit regardless of how I helped you.
When you were Tae and you guys had trouble, I talked to her and solved it for you. When Tae died, and you dated Jenny, I talked to you and told you that everything was fine and she'll be happy for you two. When things happened with Jenny, I reminded her constantly about you. But never, NEVER, once did you ever thank me for it. I got pushed away constantly by you, you pushed me, beat me, yelled at me and did everything you can possibly do, and it hurt. It HURT. Do you know how bad I felt every time I tried to help you and it seemed like I was just doing this because I had too much time on my hands?
You say I was unreasonable in not wanting to meet your friend. How would you feel, if I tell your girlfriend I know a guy that can help her with her problems and is willing to take her away from where she is to somewhere else? I don't care how close you are with him, to me it sounded dangerous and scary. I didn't know the guy, and to be honest, I didn't trust him either. I have friends, even if you don't think I do. I'm not really a loner like you think I am.
I admit I'm stressed, but did you really know WHY I was stressed? You didn't. My grandpa was in the hospital at the time you KEPT pestering me about meeting you friend. And he died 21 days ago. Do you know how stressed I was? And now Hamao, his friends don't think he has much time left either. I wasn't a person with a great past, and I was HAPPY for the last four months me and him were together. He doesn't stress me out, but instead he gives me hope.
I just turned 20 a couple of days ago. And the day after my birthday he dropped the bomb on me that he's going to leave me soon. And I don't know what to expect. I don't know what I'll be come, but I can just keep hoping. All I wanted to say is, I believe I have done ALL I can as your friend, and I'm tired of being treated like the trash I was when we were friends. I don't think I'll ever be able to talk to you the same. Because you never listened to anything I said. You said Henry/Minho was bad but so are you.
You're just a hypocrite. I didn't need you to go and talk to people for me, I can stand up for myself. And if Hamao's death was really affecting me that much, don't you think I would have said something? I didn't need you to go and say stuff to him, and truthfully, it hurt me to know you did that. Whatever, I don't think it means anything to you anyway how I felt.
Goodbye Aaron,
Joanne