not the wedding of your expectation
sekai
pg-13
a/n: unleashing an other draft
something comes to an end with oh sehun by a wedding.
one of those that happen normally when two people feel like settling down, or just one and the other simply compromises. or no one at all, just a compromise hanging heavily in the atmosphere.
“nervous?” he gives out a smile and a supportive pat on the back of the groom.
“no.” jongin gives back a grin. “just a bit strained, actually. this is not something i’m used to.” His hand lightly clicks around the chair’s arm.
“have another marriage and you’ll gain yourself back.” sehun leans on the table, fishing his cigarettes out and lights up one. the first blow of smoke goes faint and flows its way to the big window as sehun watches, until it vanishes into the air to let the silence creeps in, but jongin breaks it again.
“can’t believe you can still joke like that now.”
the younger man turns back with another smile, ready to say something more about his joke but realizes that his friend is no longer smiling or grinning. his eyes stare directly at sehun, the corners of his lips don’t perk up like his usual beautiful smile.
“well… i can still? like always.”
sehun’s weak response doesn’t help brushing that strange expression off jongin’s face, so he decides it’s better to turn away and focus on smoking. It goes on for a while, one staring and the other ignoring although sehun sure feels like jongin is burning holes into him with his gaze. but he has mastered it; to ignore everything no matter how much it matters, just like how jongin taught him to long before.
it goes on until the groom’s phone rings, sehun takes the chance when he picks up the call to discard the burned out filter and stand back straight. one more minute and he sure would collapse, while he still doesn’t understand what just went wrong with Jongin.
“she is here?”
foreign fingers find it way to sehun’s.
“okay, okay soojung…” they thread with his cold ones, caress slowly as if the owner wants to feel every little scaled off skin around his fingernails, every smallest crease on his palm, “i have sehun to get my back here, don’t worry,” and to manipulate every of his knuckles when sehun looks down blankly at how jongin looks at his hand so endearingly.
“i’ll call back when i’m ready. bye.” sehun’s heart skipped a faint beat when jongin hangs up at the same time with looking up straight at him, into his eyes for the longest time in their entire relationship.
“i’m going.”
“…”
“i’m going, sehun.”
“yeah.”
“just yeah?”
sehun inhales deeply as he gathers all he has to speak up again. “it’s not the time for me to be that friend who picks one option for you whenever you ask, jongin. i’m no longer that one to make you call off everything and run. i…” he feels like he’s about to throw up. “… i’m not the one who decided to get married to his best friend’s best friend.”
it sounded normally, only the two of them know exactly what really went on. “i’m going, sehun. i’m going i’m going i’m going…” jongin cups his face with his warm hands, feeling the cool skin touching his. he doesn’t stop whispering, telling sehun that he’s going in the silent yearn that the other will hold him back. he stands up and their foreheads touch, memories break out and fill the room, making the air too thick to breathe around sehun and rhythmically squeeze jongin’s heart lightly with the church bell’s sound as a warning.
“go and be her man.” jongin can barely hear sehun, but it doesn’t take him long to get what the other meant.
jongin sighs, buries sehun into a tight hug all of a sudden. the younger stumbles, but doesn’t struggle. he lets jongin have his way because he knows things will end just as he predicted - nothing can go wrong. it’s aggressive - the grip around him - possessive, angry, desperate, with a taste of regret but on top of that, like the last touch they can share before things change forever. jongin breathes sehun in, mixed with his own scent, with strange cologne he never knew from where sehun got it and the scent of freshly laundried fabric of the suit they picked together last month.
“… let me call them for you.” sehun reaches for jongin’s phone on the table when he feel the man loosening his arms, over the broad shoulder of his friend he types in the familiar pass code and looks for the call log, the other hand patting calmly on Jongin’s back.
“our groom is done. come pick him up.” he nudges Jongin lightly on the side and the other releases him.
“i’m going.” jongin doesn’t give up. until he gets something certain. “i’m going.”
“okay.” sehun fixes jongin’s suit, makes sure his vest doesn’t make any crinkle inside until when he is sure the suit fits his friend perfectly, patting his shoulder. “come on, you had the guts to start…”
and he smashes his lips against jongin’s, in a bruising crash but more like a clingy farewell kiss to the best friend of his whole life, with push and shove and pull and tug, all hot and open-mouthed with tongues intertwining and teeth clashing. sehun fits him even more perfectly, jongin thinks, as they give more and more into the kiss. at the moment jongin almost finds what he needs and sehun almost thinks again about how things could be different, something snapped and he pushes away.
“… then i have the heart to end.”
sehun wipes the back of his hand across his mouth, picks up his cigarettes and lighter and tucks them safely inside his pocket. “let’s go.” he turns the groom around and pushes him towards the door, doesn’t forget to close it behind. jongin slowly walks along the hallway, and sehun smiles at how things have changed already; it’s no longer jongin having his back, lingering behind him to make sure he goes to the right direction and not dazing off. and now, he’s behind jongin, having his best friend’s back, head slightly bent down in gaining concentration.
and everything goes perfectly. it slides like a smooth flow in front of sehun’s eyes; he keeps the constant smile during the ceremony, occasionally checks on jongin and sighs in relief to see his friend is still okay. he chats a bit with chanyeol and luhan behind, grins the brightest when bride and groom kiss, waves them off to the airport to start honeymoon, cleans up a few things then sits down and talks with friends in a small reunion.
almost everyone was here, high school boys now have grown into men and it seems like nothing is missed or went forgotten like the blank gaze jongin gave to sehun’s direction when he was done kissing the bride, the younger being too busy to raise his arms in with everyone in celebration.
pg-13
a/n: unleashing an other draft
something comes to an end with oh sehun by a wedding.
one of those that happen normally when two people feel like settling down, or just one and the other simply compromises. or no one at all, just a compromise hanging heavily in the atmosphere.
“nervous?” he gives out a smile and a supportive pat on the back of the groom.
“no.” jongin gives back a grin. “just a bit strained, actually. this is not something i’m used to.” His hand lightly clicks around the chair’s arm.
“have another marriage and you’ll gain yourself back.” sehun leans on the table, fishing his cigarettes out and lights up one. the first blow of smoke goes faint and flows its way to the big window as sehun watches, until it vanishes into the air to let the silence creeps in, but jongin breaks it again.
“can’t believe you can still joke like that now.”
the younger man turns back with another smile, ready to say something more about his joke but realizes that his friend is no longer smiling or grinning. his eyes stare directly at sehun, the corners of his lips don’t perk up like his usual beautiful smile.
“well… i can still? like always.”
sehun’s weak response doesn’t help brushing that strange expression off jongin’s face, so he decides it’s better to turn away and focus on smoking. It goes on for a while, one staring and the other ignoring although sehun sure feels like jongin is burning holes into him with his gaze. but he has mastered it; to ignore everything no matter how much it matters, just like how jongin taught him to long before.
it goes on until the groom’s phone rings, sehun takes the chance when he picks up the call to discard the burned out filter and stand back straight. one more minute and he sure would collapse, while he still doesn’t understand what just went wrong with Jongin.
“she is here?”
foreign fingers find it way to sehun’s.
“okay, okay soojung…” they thread with his cold ones, caress slowly as if the owner wants to feel every little scaled off skin around his fingernails, every smallest crease on his palm, “i have sehun to get my back here, don’t worry,” and to manipulate every of his knuckles when sehun looks down blankly at how jongin looks at his hand so endearingly.
“i’ll call back when i’m ready. bye.” sehun’s heart skipped a faint beat when jongin hangs up at the same time with looking up straight at him, into his eyes for the longest time in their entire relationship.
“i’m going.”
“…”
“i’m going, sehun.”
“yeah.”
“just yeah?”
sehun inhales deeply as he gathers all he has to speak up again. “it’s not the time for me to be that friend who picks one option for you whenever you ask, jongin. i’m no longer that one to make you call off everything and run. i…” he feels like he’s about to throw up. “… i’m not the one who decided to get married to his best friend’s best friend.”
it sounded normally, only the two of them know exactly what really went on. “i’m going, sehun. i’m going i’m going i’m going…” jongin cups his face with his warm hands, feeling the cool skin touching his. he doesn’t stop whispering, telling sehun that he’s going in the silent yearn that the other will hold him back. he stands up and their foreheads touch, memories break out and fill the room, making the air too thick to breathe around sehun and rhythmically squeeze jongin’s heart lightly with the church bell’s sound as a warning.
“go and be her man.” jongin can barely hear sehun, but it doesn’t take him long to get what the other meant.
jongin sighs, buries sehun into a tight hug all of a sudden. the younger stumbles, but doesn’t struggle. he lets jongin have his way because he knows things will end just as he predicted - nothing can go wrong. it’s aggressive - the grip around him - possessive, angry, desperate, with a taste of regret but on top of that, like the last touch they can share before things change forever. jongin breathes sehun in, mixed with his own scent, with strange cologne he never knew from where sehun got it and the scent of freshly laundried fabric of the suit they picked together last month.
“… let me call them for you.” sehun reaches for jongin’s phone on the table when he feel the man loosening his arms, over the broad shoulder of his friend he types in the familiar pass code and looks for the call log, the other hand patting calmly on Jongin’s back.
“our groom is done. come pick him up.” he nudges Jongin lightly on the side and the other releases him.
“i’m going.” jongin doesn’t give up. until he gets something certain. “i’m going.”
“okay.” sehun fixes jongin’s suit, makes sure his vest doesn’t make any crinkle inside until when he is sure the suit fits his friend perfectly, patting his shoulder. “come on, you had the guts to start…”
and he smashes his lips against jongin’s, in a bruising crash but more like a clingy farewell kiss to the best friend of his whole life, with push and shove and pull and tug, all hot and open-mouthed with tongues intertwining and teeth clashing. sehun fits him even more perfectly, jongin thinks, as they give more and more into the kiss. at the moment jongin almost finds what he needs and sehun almost thinks again about how things could be different, something snapped and he pushes away.
“… then i have the heart to end.”
sehun wipes the back of his hand across his mouth, picks up his cigarettes and lighter and tucks them safely inside his pocket. “let’s go.” he turns the groom around and pushes him towards the door, doesn’t forget to close it behind. jongin slowly walks along the hallway, and sehun smiles at how things have changed already; it’s no longer jongin having his back, lingering behind him to make sure he goes to the right direction and not dazing off. and now, he’s behind jongin, having his best friend’s back, head slightly bent down in gaining concentration.
and everything goes perfectly. it slides like a smooth flow in front of sehun’s eyes; he keeps the constant smile during the ceremony, occasionally checks on jongin and sighs in relief to see his friend is still okay. he chats a bit with chanyeol and luhan behind, grins the brightest when bride and groom kiss, waves them off to the airport to start honeymoon, cleans up a few things then sits down and talks with friends in a small reunion.
almost everyone was here, high school boys now have grown into men and it seems like nothing is missed or went forgotten like the blank gaze jongin gave to sehun’s direction when he was done kissing the bride, the younger being too busy to raise his arms in with everyone in celebration.