A Tricky thing...
...called confidence. We've all had it, we've all lacked it at times, but it's how you manage the latter is what really counts. I've been told by many people, girls and guys, that I should be more confident. Whether it has to do with a job, project, or women. I do have confidence in certain abilities, but it's difficult for me to build up confidence with other things. Being sociable is a big one. Anyhoo, I guess I am not very good at managing the lack of confidence I have in myself in a social sense, especially with the ladies. Now when I say managing, I mean picking myself up after my confidence has been shot down for some reason or another.
I guess I can trace this all the way back to my HS days. Being on the baseball team, I thought I was a hot shot, and that all the "chicks would dig me". Yeah, I actually used to say that, hahaha. Anyways, I had a humongous crush on this girl who was a cheerleader. I thought nothing of it, so one day I just went up to her and just put it out there on the line, and told her what was on my mind. Well, let's just say she was less than amused. She never spoke to me again. Now, I know that was along time ago, and I am sure everyone has a story like this back in their day. But for some reason that cut me pretty deep. It shook me pretty bad, but I was able to get most of that confidence back that I had before that time. Now comes time for going to college. I was like, hell yeah no one knows me here so I am starting off fresh. Sure enough I met a really great girl and we went out for about 2 and a half years. Stuff just fizzled out with that relationship, and I always think back about how I screwed that up, but thats a whole other story in itself.
The next relationship I was in really really got me bad...in fact I think I still feel the effects from that one to this day. Without getting into the whole thing, the basic gist of it was that we went out for a few months and I fell for. Unfortunately she didn'e see it the same way, and broke up with me. The kicker is that about a week later she took a trip to see some family, or so she said, and I ended up getting an email about 10 days after we had broken up saying that she had gotten engaged while she was away. Now, for some odd reason I guess I wanted to torture my self I dunno, but I hung out with her one last time just to see if she was lying or what and sure enough my mind went numb when I saw her with him and that ring. It was a vicious blow. I guess I knd of tie in the whole confidence with women thing with the whole trust thing, I dont know call me crazy I guess. Anyways, I know everyone has these sob stories, but this is what was on my mind this particular evening so I decided to blah blah blah it out on this thing.
It's time for me to pick myself up off the mat, it has been way too long for me to just sit around and do nothing. I am going to try my damnedest to try harder, and bring this confidence thing up. I feel refreshed and renewed and YEEEEHAWWWWW!!!! Hahaha, I just wanted to get that last thing out :-P
Another busy weekend for me so I will update after that most likely....catch ya on the flipside Mr. Bass!!!!
Jeffy G
I guess I can trace this all the way back to my HS days. Being on the baseball team, I thought I was a hot shot, and that all the "chicks would dig me". Yeah, I actually used to say that, hahaha. Anyways, I had a humongous crush on this girl who was a cheerleader. I thought nothing of it, so one day I just went up to her and just put it out there on the line, and told her what was on my mind. Well, let's just say she was less than amused. She never spoke to me again. Now, I know that was along time ago, and I am sure everyone has a story like this back in their day. But for some reason that cut me pretty deep. It shook me pretty bad, but I was able to get most of that confidence back that I had before that time. Now comes time for going to college. I was like, hell yeah no one knows me here so I am starting off fresh. Sure enough I met a really great girl and we went out for about 2 and a half years. Stuff just fizzled out with that relationship, and I always think back about how I screwed that up, but thats a whole other story in itself.
The next relationship I was in really really got me bad...in fact I think I still feel the effects from that one to this day. Without getting into the whole thing, the basic gist of it was that we went out for a few months and I fell for. Unfortunately she didn'e see it the same way, and broke up with me. The kicker is that about a week later she took a trip to see some family, or so she said, and I ended up getting an email about 10 days after we had broken up saying that she had gotten engaged while she was away. Now, for some odd reason I guess I wanted to torture my self I dunno, but I hung out with her one last time just to see if she was lying or what and sure enough my mind went numb when I saw her with him and that ring. It was a vicious blow. I guess I knd of tie in the whole confidence with women thing with the whole trust thing, I dont know call me crazy I guess. Anyways, I know everyone has these sob stories, but this is what was on my mind this particular evening so I decided to blah blah blah it out on this thing.
It's time for me to pick myself up off the mat, it has been way too long for me to just sit around and do nothing. I am going to try my damnedest to try harder, and bring this confidence thing up. I feel refreshed and renewed and YEEEEHAWWWWW!!!! Hahaha, I just wanted to get that last thing out :-P
Another busy weekend for me so I will update after that most likely....catch ya on the flipside Mr. Bass!!!!
Jeffy G