Me have well command of Englich Langage
Well looking back at my first two posts, or entries, or whatever, I have discovered that I have indeed come through with my promise that said posts (or entries, etc.) would be “replete with spelling erors” (by the way did you notice the delicious irony in the quoted phrase…it really makes you think). I have decided that since I have nothing better to do I will find the aforementioned errors and either explain them away or otherwise examine their significance in detail.
1. “The new will not be anymore exciting than it was this time.” While this statement is true, I nonetheless omitted the “s” critical to the classification of the word “news” as a noun as opposed to a useless adjective. Believe it or not this omission was intentional. I was actually referring to the new will I am working on in which I actually take possessions from my “beneficiaries” instead of bestowing my own worldly possessions. “Why would you need to take possessions when presumably my will not be effective until I die?” you may ask. The simple answer is because I will need said possessions to pay for my elaborate funeral which will include some of the following: a mime, a mine, 6,422 pirates, a robot the size of the moon, a pterodactyl on acid, the crown jewels, and a movie about my life starring Errol Flynn as me and Jessica Alba as herself.
2. “Perhaps there are those of you who are wondering should you cast my vote for me….” On the face of it this sentence appears inscrutable. To cast someone else’s vote for themselves itself would seem to be wildly unnecessary and of dubious legality. The thought of even considering this possibility without it being suggested seems even more ludicrous. Here, is what I meant by that delightfully confusing sentence: Voting is important. I’m very busy what with my plans for world conquest and “getting down with the ladies.” Between said activities I do not have time to vote, even for myself. That’s where you come in. I need you to vote for me for me (note that was not an error).
3. “Therefore, I submit that when the time comes for me to take the reigns of leadership you shouldn’t worry about the demise of your personal liberties but rather making it through the next day.” Reigns of leadership? This was a mistake. There is no way around it. I was thinking both of my reign of terror and the reins of leadership and the rains in Spain (which I think fall mostly in the planes).* Regardless I would like to apologize for any inconvenience that error caused to anyone reading this. Rest assured that my difficulties with homophones will in no way affect my ability to rule with an iron fist.
Thus ends my stroll down mammary lain, with its spelling/grammatical/logical errors and fond visions of the future and of the past (that was a good bagel).
*Never fly over Spain without an umbrella.
1. “The new will not be anymore exciting than it was this time.” While this statement is true, I nonetheless omitted the “s” critical to the classification of the word “news” as a noun as opposed to a useless adjective. Believe it or not this omission was intentional. I was actually referring to the new will I am working on in which I actually take possessions from my “beneficiaries” instead of bestowing my own worldly possessions. “Why would you need to take possessions when presumably my will not be effective until I die?” you may ask. The simple answer is because I will need said possessions to pay for my elaborate funeral which will include some of the following: a mime, a mine, 6,422 pirates, a robot the size of the moon, a pterodactyl on acid, the crown jewels, and a movie about my life starring Errol Flynn as me and Jessica Alba as herself.
2. “Perhaps there are those of you who are wondering should you cast my vote for me….” On the face of it this sentence appears inscrutable. To cast someone else’s vote for themselves itself would seem to be wildly unnecessary and of dubious legality. The thought of even considering this possibility without it being suggested seems even more ludicrous. Here, is what I meant by that delightfully confusing sentence: Voting is important. I’m very busy what with my plans for world conquest and “getting down with the ladies.” Between said activities I do not have time to vote, even for myself. That’s where you come in. I need you to vote for me for me (note that was not an error).
3. “Therefore, I submit that when the time comes for me to take the reigns of leadership you shouldn’t worry about the demise of your personal liberties but rather making it through the next day.” Reigns of leadership? This was a mistake. There is no way around it. I was thinking both of my reign of terror and the reins of leadership and the rains in Spain (which I think fall mostly in the planes).* Regardless I would like to apologize for any inconvenience that error caused to anyone reading this. Rest assured that my difficulties with homophones will in no way affect my ability to rule with an iron fist.
Thus ends my stroll down mammary lain, with its spelling/grammatical/logical errors and fond visions of the future and of the past (that was a good bagel).
*Never fly over Spain without an umbrella.