Comments | tyvoq: I still don't get it...

tyvoq

I still don't get it...

Sep 01, 2004 16:14

So here I am. I’m 25. I’m still clueless. My past is worthless. I’ve avoided everything I can. Sure there were good times too. Did I learn anything? Not really. I’ve met some very cool people. I don’t really know any of them anymore. I’ve erased my history. I’ve worked very hard all my life to avoid the things that were supposed to ( Read more... )

Comments 6

opiejuan September 1 2004, 13:33:51 UTC

the past doesn't matter, man. forgetting your "history" may be the single greatest thing you can do for your state of mind and being.

don't worry about what people think you should do - they only know that and nothing else. you know better, you just need to trust that your natural mind, not the one that sits aside it (the ego), questioning it, is enough (and in fact perfect). drop the ego and enjoy yourself and everything - and if you can also drop trying to make sense of it all, enjoy the ego, too.

missdawn September 1 2004, 14:37:47 UTC

maybe this is the time to learn who you are. it's fine to sit and be motivated by nothing else. concentrate on your breathing. is there anything you ever thought about doing but never thought you had the chance? why not go and do it? our culture seems hell-bent on making people believe that they have these things that they must do, master or understand. i'm 27 with no ambition to ever have a real job and i certainly don't understand responsibility as far as "the real world" is concerned. but i do understand that i like traveling and i will continue to do that until i run out of steam, not caring whether or not my family and friends are concerned about my welfare and future. as far as i'm concerned (or at least starting to realise) is that there is only now. most everything you mentioned that you either don't have or that you don't understand is something seeded in the past or non-existant in the future. my mother is the same way- she feels she needs to harness these things in order to obtain control in her life. i feel the opposite is ( ... )

Yet ANOTHER book suggestion survivinglove September 1 2004, 15:34:10 UTC

FINDING YOUR OWN NORTH STAR: Martha Beck

She explains what it is to find your calling...in normal, non psychiatric type terms.

What do you do....that you forget time when you do that. For instance...you begin some project at 9am and before you know it...its 5pm and you have forgotten to eat b/c it only seems like its been a couple hours...thats how I found my 'calling'...just put all those things that I find to be medatative where the time goes by quickly and (more often than not) when Ive completed whatever it is I feel like I just woke up from a good nap.

Good luck,
Kate

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Re: ...er... tyvoq September 2 2004, 08:03:13 UTC

Hm... While the idea that everyone like me is a bit comforting (if not a bit dismaying) it leaves me with one question. What is it about other people that gives them the appearance of ambition and drive and dreams if they are, like me, without all these things?

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Re: well... tyvoq September 2 2004, 15:02:46 UTC

Ok, I think I see what you're saying. You got the grades, did artistic works, have some credentials and all you can think about is how you didn't move away when you had the chance. Whereas, I moved away, and all I can think about is how I don't have any solid credentials or works behind me.

i'm a little teapot memorandmpulley September 7 2004, 07:43:00 UTC

"What is it that drives people to better themselves and their lot in life? It’s not melancholy or disappointment alone. If it was, I’d be motivated just fine ( ... )