stressed
so this last week has been pretty much really shitty...last night my bosses wife got her mom to call and report the car the i was borrowing from her stolen so i almost got charged with a frickin felony and taken to prison..my boss still hasn't paid me the money that he owes me, 2500 bucks wich sucks cuz im homeless and im trying to rent a frickin apartment and im lookin for a new job and i have like eleventybillion aps out and nobody is callin me back. max is gonna stop fuckin talkin to me if i dont get this shit takin care of and im doin everything that i can but she doesn't trust me..and i dont blame her cuz lately i haven't been able to follow through on anything i say im gonna do..i need a new car and i need to bring my truck back from idaho to washington so i can get that fucker sold and get some goddamn money for it..aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh....all i fuckin want to do is have a little bit of sucess....if i could only just have my money from my boss and get a new fuckin job then i'd be good to fuckin go..i can take of the rest of the shit from there, is that really too much to ask for, seriously?!?..right now i should be sleeping but i cant shut off my frickin brain cuz im too stressed and i have to get up at like 700 in the morning, which isnn't all that far away now, cuz i have to go to dshs to see if i can get medical and food stamps cuz im fuckin poor ass white trash...what does it take for a guy to fuckin succeed in this world man...god fuck shit piss ass bitch fuckin butt fucker....i feel a little bit better now...man, sometimes i wish i still smoked cigarettes..like right now, cuz that would be a fuckin stress reliever, but i quit that shit and im not gonna start it up again cuz it was a fuckin bitch to quit.....all i want to do is get my money and a new job, and tomorrow hopefully one of the two happens...or even both...i dont really care which one it is, just as long as one of them happens then ill be fuckin happy...it will take a little weight of my shoulders so i can rest a little easier at night...fuckin a..no wonder i have insomnia, i can never stop thinkin...the only time i ever fuckin relax is when im with max, she just makes the world...not matter, it just, disapears...even if its only for a second, especially when i first see her and she comes up and gives me one of those fuckin amazing hugs, and i feel for a minute like everything is exactly how it should be..i just wish i could give a little of that back by getting some of this shit taken care of so that we can get our apartment and start savin up money to go to college...i just want to be able to take care of her..thats all..just be there for her and make her happy....hopefully some stuff falls together and starts goin my way tomorrow...all i can do is try my best and hope that it works...well..i feel better now that ive vented some of this stress so im gonna go and try and get a couple hours of sleep before i have to get up and start my fuckin day...until next time...peace out bitch