My life as it stands
Way too much has happened since my last entry. I now work full time at Fall Out and actually have more to do with all the bars than just bar tending. I help out with whatever needs to be done and some paper work stuffs. I actually feel like someone has finally noticed and put to use my extreme attention to detail and the fact that I’m a work-ahollic. I actually quit Fall Out but the day after my last day I went back to O'Charleys and realized I couldn't give two shits about that place and I really felt like I was loosing way too much by not being at Fall Out. Thank god Tucker and Heather had been fighting to keep me all along, all I had to do was call them and I instantly worked their full time. I love my job and can't believe for two seconds I almost gave up the one job that I can honestly say will be the high point of my life. Even after I go to school, drop the money for an education and get a degree I will never have anything better that I have now. I enjoy being a part of something where everything I do has an impact in the business.
Now on to the best thing that has happened to me: I'm now dating Randy White. I've known this guy for the better part of 9 years and the whole time I've respected and valued out friendship, we are so much alike it's scary. Now for the better part of nine years I have harbored secret feelings for him. Never told anyone because he was always with some one or I was always in a relationship and I've always been one to respect monogamy and other people's business, no matter how bad the actual relationship is. But I couldn't help it this time. He showed up back in Richmond and actually ended up working for the bars, again. I couldn't help myself, I didn't care who or what he was with (no one, thank god!) but I decided it's been too long and I'm not going to play this "wanting but never having" game anymore. I started to hit on him, RELENTLESSLY. And that is very much outside of my character, but I was done. I had to see if there was anything there. There was. A whole lot. Turns out the years I spent pining away for him he was very much doing the same for me. Turns out the feelings I had been hiding all these years were mutual; in fact he didn't really hide how he felt in the past, I’m just not smart enough to pick up on things of that nature. So now I've finally got what I’ve wanted all these years and it's fucking surreal. I can't stand it, the guys is perfect for me in every way. I could never ask for my "perfect" guy because I’m weird and mostly insane so the person in my head couldn't exist. He does exist. And I'm beyond floored that he's mine. I can honestly say this man had pulled so much out of me the short time we've been dating it's scary. I'm not the emotional type, by far, but now I can honestly say I know what it's like to be completely taken over by somebody. He is everything to me and more.