yesterday's league of mushrooms...
This is Ânderson Polga. He's a defender at Sporting and probably the only reason why Real Madrid don't get this season's award for Biggest Disappointment in the Last 16 of the Champions League. Their achievement is the same; both caused four goals in the second leg and are responsible for record defeats in their clubs' Champions League history. However, well, Polga is one person, not an entire team, and he also scored an own-goal. I admit, that's hard to beat.
I still can't quite understand how Real Madrid could have misjudged their opponents so badly. For them, it was the second match against a Spanish side within four days - okay, against a side with a Spanish manager and a total of 5 Spanish speaking players on the pitch (against Real's 7), what's your point? - so one could assume they were used to it by now and could deal with what they were facing. Apparently, that wasn't the case. The men in white reminded me of over-excited kids at the edge of a cliff, eagerly jumping into the water and only realising as they're about to drown that they can't swim.
2006 FIFA World Footballer Cannavaro was completely overtaxed with Liverpool's quick, precise advances. Pepe spent most of his time fouling and complaining. And Heinze... I've long given up trying to understand what he's actually doing on the pitch, honestly. Lass and Robben were invisible. Gago was usually cornered by two or three Liverpool players when he had the ball and pressured to make a bad pass - he might be a rock, but he can't do everything on his own. Sneijder tried to be useful, but you can't beat a keeper like Pepe Reina with weak, low shots. Sergio Ramos tried to remind people that there were actually forwards on the pitch a couple of times, but Higuaín and Raúl were too badly positioned in and around the box. The subs, maybe with the exception of Marcelo who seems to be constantly improving in the midfield, seemed like acts of desperation and didn't improve things in the slightest.
That leaves us with one player. Usually, when a world class goalkeeper is beaten four times in a match, and not even one single goal was his fault, people are quick to advise him to find himself a better club, one that meets his personal quality standards. When that goalkeeper is Iker Casillas, however, useful advice doesn't come that easily, especially considering that he has just signed a lifetime contract at Real Madrid. I wouldn't even say that the club doesn't meet his standards and qualitative requirements, because it does, technically. It's just some of his teammates who clearly don't. Gerrard, Torres & Co. might have beaten the FIFA World Keeper of the Year 2008 on the scoresheet, but credit where credit is due, they were all set up by Madridistas eager to give their keeper one of the worst nights of his career. Maybe they should be advised to find themselves a club that meets their qualitative standards, but considering their recent performances, such a club might be difficult to find in the first leagues of Europe.
Still, all things considered, the biggest loser within Real last night wasn't Heinze, nor Pepe, nor Cannavaro. It was the locally grown Miguel Torres, to whom once again everyone else was preferred (bar the other canteranos who share his fate), and who once again had to watch from the bench how his so-called "competition" failed abysmally. This neglect was put in an even worse light as Real's opponent granted academy graduate Jay Spearing some match experience at the score of 3-0. People might argue that the decision wasn't difficult for Rafa Benítez as his team was 3-0 up at that point, but considering the fact that Real's defense has already failed abysmally several times during this season and Miguel Torres can play every defense position (where, as I said above, things can't get any worse), the decision to give young, locally grown players a chance wouldn't have been any more difficult for Juande Ramos than it was for Rafa Benítez - if Ramos had actually given the matter the appropriate amount of thought.
And what of the other side? Or, to get back to poor Senhor Ânderson Polga, the other sides?
Jürgen Klinsmann and Rafael Benítez probably couldn't be more different if they tried, but funnily enough, their respective clubs show worrying similarities. Top in the Champions League, crap in the local league. 2-1 and 2-0 defeats against league giants like Cologne and Middlesbrough, and record wins in the Champions League where, as everyone knows, the worst teams in Europe compete for silverware. Right? Funny, isn't it. One has to wonder how the hell their opponents passed the group stage, or even qualified for the competition in the first place, and why Cologne and Middlesbrough didn't.
Anyway. The phoenixes rose from the ashes and entertained their home audiences with breathtaking performances against Champions League regulars.
I actually expected Klinsmann to field a B squad considering the result of the first leg and the five away goals, but he didn't make any major changes apart from granting Jörg Butt his first appearance for Bayern in a competitive fixture and leaving out the recently so disappointing Martín Demichelis. Ribéry and Toni were sidelined with injuries, but nobody was majorly concerned about that after recent results proved that Bayern are actually more successful without their top signings of last season. Their opponents have become used to Ribéry and learned how to stop him, and Luca Toni has been in some sort of midlife crisis ever since the World Cup. He hasn't changed much compared to last season, he still looks like a wardrobe on stilts and moves accordingly, nearly tripping over his own legs no matter what he's doing, and he's incredibly egoistical on top of it, but unlike last season, he's not distracting us from that by scoring lots of goals. At the moment, it's glaringly obvious how much he's obstructing himself and others with his style of play. Klose seems almost relieved when he can play alongside Podolski, like a little schoolkid who has been bullied by a big fat classmate for over a year and is finally rid of him. And speaking of Podolski - the guy miraculously remembered how to score goals, which I assume is mostly due to the fact that his return to Cologne is sealed and his remaining months in Munich will be (more or less) fun and games. Their victory was never doubtful, but I wouldn't have expected it to be that high. They could have lost 4-0 and would still have advanced to the quarterfinals, but they showed good morale and sent Sporting home with the not very flattering label "completely unsuitable for this competition" (to put it mildly). Klinsmann's decision to call up two players from the reserves even caused a rather famous name to re-appear on the score sheet when Thomas Müller crowned his first Champions League match with an assist and a goal (set up by José Sosa, who has already been considered a transfer mistake by a lot of supporters and journalists alike). From what I saw on TV, the stadium wasn't sold out, but the audience (at least the part that supported the home side) definitely got their money's worth.
Liverpool dominated the entire first half, giving Real no single opportunity to gape for air. The only thing that could stop them were fouls, of which there were many, because at some point Real forgot that the game is called football, not kicking your opponent's legs. But even that didn't help much on the long run. Liverpool boasted with their famed Premier League speed, stunning one-touch football, great positional play and a damned well execution of a strategy that shouted "Rafa Benítez" from the top of its non-existing lungs. Wear them out during the first half, and you'll have the entire second half to catch your breaths. The goals were cleverly set up, mostly with two or three Reds right in front of Iker Casillas and the entire white defense in their backs, helpless, reduced to spectators. The pressure that Liverpool put on Real Madrid was so intense that the merengues were constantly forced to make mistakes, especially where it counted - in and around the box. The penalty might have been a bit controversial, but replays showed a clear movement of Heinze's arm towards the ball so the decision is acceptable. And it's not as if that scene was crucial in any way. There were more gaping holes in Real's defense than there is in your average Swiss cheese, and no trace of creativity or hindsight at all. On the other side, Liverpool's defense was like a brick wall, impenetrable and solid. When it mattered, all ten field players were in the back, defending in a tight unity and leaving no space for Raúl and Higuaín between them.
It's incredibly hard to find a fault in this Liverpool side, who once again displayed everything I love about them: speed, accuracy, fidelity to their manager's clever strategy, toughness, tirelessness, cleverness and pure beauty in their play. Granted, it was once again the famed pair of Torres and Gerrard who opened the score and led the team to extremes, which clearly won't shut up those people who argue that Liverpool are too dependent on them and their form, but it clearly wasn't just Torres and Gerrard who played amazingly well from the first second onwards. Every single player showed utmost dedication and motivation, and helped the club achieve this fantastic result.
In the end, it wasn't just San Iker, who prevented an even more humiliating defeat of the tenfold European champions with stunning saves and once again proved that there might be something saintly about him, but also Liverpool's quick acceptance of Real's collective surrender and the consequential generous gesture of mercy. A gesture that, in the history of mankind, has always been considered a demonstration of real greatness.
In other news, I was pleased to see that Villarreal advanced (because I have a soft spot for them) and that Juventus didn't (because I, uhm, don't have a soft spot for them XD). Tonight I'm hoping for Barça, Arsenal and Inter to make it, and if there is a Football God, he will grant me those wishes and make up for what I had to go through last night.
Related Links:
- fcbayern.de: Irresistible Bayern Roar into Last Eight
- fcbayern.de: 'We Really Enjoyed Ourselves'
- realmadrid.com: No Glory at Anfield
- 20minutos.es: Casillas se fue llorando de Anfield (Casillas wept in the locker room after the defeat. Raúl consoled him so the keeper could give his post-match interviews.)
- liverpoolfc.tv: Rampant Reds March into Last Eight
- liverpoolfc.tv: Post-match interviews by Torres, Kuyt, Mascherano and Spearing