Bringing You Back Chaper 12B
Title: Bringing You Back
Pairing: RYODA
Rating: pg13
Genre: Angst? Romance?
Summary: Ryo and Tatsuya have been best friends since they were young but unknown to Tatsuya, Ryo is in love with him. One day, something happened which made Ryo wish that he and Tatsuya were never friends and that he has all grown up. What happens when he wakes up one morning, all grown up without Tatsuya by his side?
Disclaimer: Ryo belongs to NEWS and KANJANI while Ueda belongs to KAT-TUN. *though I wish they own each other*
Warning: the story's inspired by the movie. 13 going on 30. *yeah. The one that stars Jennifer Garner*
Tatsuya didn't say a word.
"What else do you need to tell me Ryo? I understand. You're getting married! Congratulations, okay? Please get out of my way." Tatsuya said.
"Tatsuya, no. I won't marry her. I love you!" Ryo said
"Please stop. I'm not dumb Ryo. You don't love me, okay? You never did and you never will. You hate me. You hate me because I chose Yamapi instead of you.
Let's end it at that. Let's not make it difficult. Let's go back to hating each other." Tatsuya said.
"What are you talking about? I never hated you for siding Yamapi before!" Ryo said.
"Really? Then explain to me why everything changed after that day." Tatsuya said
Ryo can't give him a reply. Though he knows that he never hated Tatsuya, the other won't believe him. The Ryo that Tatsuya knows is different from who he is.
That Ryo hated Tatsuya so much.
"Tatsuya...I'm not that Ryo anymore!"
"I don't care. I finally decided that we really can never go back to what we were before. That we can't even be friends. The most that we can do is to be
civil with each other." Tatsuya said.
"Tatsuya, I know you love me too...Please..."
Tatsuya's tears kept on pouring.
"Love you? How can I love someone like you? I would NEVER love you." Tatsuya said. As he said those words, he felt like his heart was being torn into pieces.
"But Yamapi--"
"Yamapi is the one I love the most!" Tatsuya suddenly said.
"What?" Ryo was surprised at what Tatsuya said.
"Yamapi is the only one I love." Tatsuya repeated.
"You're lying. You don't love Yamapi. He told me he only loves you like his brother." Ryo said
"He loves me as his brother but I love more than that. He's the only one who was there when I need someone to talk to. He was the one who took care of me each and every time I feel down. He's the only one who understands me and he's the only one whom I know would never leave me." Tatsuya said.
"I'll leave her. I'll leave her to be with you!" Ryo said.
"Don't be stupid! She loves you don't you see that? You'd leave her for what? Even if you do that, you won't have me because I don't love you. I can't love someone like you."
Tatsuya made his way past Ryo but the other ran after him and hugged him from behind.
"I know what you told me is all lies. I know you love me Tatsuya. I know it. I can see it in you eyes. I can feel it when we were together in Okinawa. Please don't lie." Ryo said.
Tatsuya placed his hands on Ryo's hands and tried to pull it away slowly.
"Ryo, please? I’m tired. I want to go home. Please..." Tatsuya said calmly.
Ryo didn't want to let him go but he knows it would be better if they talk some other time. He slowly let go of Tatsuya. When Ryo's arms were no longer stopping him, Tatsuya ran as fast as he can. While running, he suddenly bumped into an old man. He just said a quick apology and continued to run.
The old man found a box that dropped from Tatsuya's bag. He was about to give it back but Tatsuya was already gone. Ryo saw what happened and approached the old man.
"Ah, sorry for that sir. He's just in a hurry." Ryo said.
"It's okay. He did apologize and it seems he had something urgent. You know him?" The old man asked
"Uhmmm...Yes."
"He dropped this.” The old man gave Ryo the box.
"Thank you, sir"
"I'd go ahead." The old man said and left him.
Ryo kept the box with him and walked around the city for a while before heading back to his apartment.
******
Tatsuya called Yamapi as soon as he came back to his apartment. The other came knocking on his door a few minutes later.
"Tatsuya? What happened?" Yamapi asked. Tatsuya was sitting on the floor crying.
"Pi, I'm so stupid. I didn't know he's getting married. I was going to tell him everything but his fiance showed up and...And everything went so fast. She was kissing him and then telling me they're getting married. I couldn't take it so I excused myself."
Yamapi knelt beside him and hugged him.
"I'm sorry Tatsuya. I'm sorry I wasn't there to protect you..." Yamapi said.
******
When he came home, Aya was already sleeping on their bed. He took a long shower and thought of the things that happened that night. He was so angry at himself. Why didn't he tell Tatsuya about Aya earlier? He curses himself.
He went out of the bathroom and remembered the box which Tatsuya dropped. He grabbed it from the table then sat on the sofa. He opened the box and saw the globe necklace. He took the necklace out of the box and inspected every inch of it.
He took a closer look when he noticed that something was written on the pendant.
*You are the reason my heart keeps on beating... I Love You, Ryo.*
He knew it. This is the proof that Tatsuya was lying to him earlier. He placed the necklace inside the box again and kept it. He has decided that tomorrow, he'll talk to Tatsuya.
******
Another meeting will be held that day and Ryo was early. There was still an hour left before the meeting but someone was banging on his door. Thinking that
it was Nakamaru and Koki, he opened it.
A fist landed on his face and he was on the floor. The guy who punched him grabbed him by his collar and pulled him up.
"I told you right? I told you I'd kill you if you hurt him!" Yamapi said.
"I didn't mean to--"
"That's bullshit Nishikido! I knew it, I shouldn't have trusted you! Do you know what you did to him? Huh? He feels like you've killed him!" Yamapi said.
"I'm willing to leave her for him! I tried to tell him that!" Ryo said.
"Leave her and let Tatsuya feel guilty? What the hell is wrong with you?"
"No. I love him!"
"Don't you ever come near him again!"
"I want to talk to him!"
"No! I will make sure you will never see him again!" Yamapi said.
"Pi!"
A call from behind came. Both Ryo and Yamapi looked at the owner of the voice. It was Tatsuya.
"Tatsuya? Why are you here?" Yamapi asked
"Pi, let go of him. Please..." Tatsuya said.
Yamapi let go of Ryo harshly.
"Tatsuya, let's talk, please..." Ryo said.
"I don't want to see you again Ryo. Leave me alone." Tatsuya said.
"But you love me. I know you love me I have--"
"How many times do I have to tell you that I don’t? Stop convincing yourself that I love you!"
"I--"
"Your girlfriend loves you! Don't you see that?"
"But I don't love her!"
"Why would you ask her hand for marriage if you don't love her?"
"Because--I ---I don't know...."
"You love her, Ryo. You just think you love me but you really don't. Please don't see me again." Tatsuya said.
Tatsuya pulled Yamapi out of the office but Ryo called him again.
"Tatsuya..."
"Goodbye Ryo..." Tatsuya said and he left with Yamapi.
When Tatsuya left, Ryo sat on the couch and cried.
Tatsuya kept on pulling Yamapi with him and would ignore the other's calls. Yamapi stopped walking and pulled Tatsuya closer to him.
"Cry if you want to." Yamapi said.
When he said this, Tatsuya hugged him and his tears started to pour down his eyes.
"I did the right thing right?" Tatsuya asked
Yamapi didn't answer. He just hugged Tatsuya like that.
Tatsuya and Yamapi weren't present in the meeting as well as Ryo. Ryo told Junno to tell the others that he wasn't feeling well while Tatsuya and Yamapi called in sick.
A week has passed and they tried their best to get on with their lives. Ryo still thinks of Tatsuya all the time while Tatsuya asked Yamapi to keep him company so that he won't have the chance to think of Ryo. They haven't seen each other since that day because Yamapi won't let Tatsuya go to T&T office even if it's for their song. All of the meetings are attended by Jin and Kame and they would just tell Yamapi what happens.
Jin and Kame came knocking on Tatsuya's door.
"Yo!" Jin greeted.
"How was it?" Yamapi asked as he let the two in.
"Same as usual. Ryo' still not there." Jin said
Ryo has always been absent in the meetings too. It's always Nakamaru and Koki who they've been talking with.
"So what did say?" Yamapi asked
"As soon as Ryo sends the song, they'll mail it to us." Kame said
"And when is that?"
"They're expecting the song from Ryo today and they'll send it first thing in the morning."
Tatsuya just sat and listened to his friends talk about their work.
******
Ryo has been playing the song that he wrote for the past hour. He's had it on replay. He recorded and sang the song which he'll send to Tatsuya. He knows that the theme was supposed to "True Love" and when you hear that word, it's supposed to have a feel good feeling to it but then, this is his way of expressing "True Love". Tatsuya is his True Love and these are the words he wanted to tell him.
******
The four of them gathered at Jin and Kame's apartment. Nakamaru and Koki were coming that morning to deliver the songs to them. After a few minutes the two arrived. kama and Jin invited them in but they declined
"Are you sure? It'll be great if you're here when we listen to it." Kame said
"Ah... We still need to go back to Osaka." Nakamaru said
"Eh? You're going home?" Kame asked.
They were high school classmates and all of them came from Osaka.
"Oh, yeah. We're helping in Ryo and Aya's wedding. It'll be tomorrow." Koki said
Tatsuya slightly jumped on his seat when he heard what Maru said. He didn't know that Ryo's wedding was tomorrow. Nakamaru and Koki left after that. Kame brought the cd with him and put it on the player. They listened to Koki and Nakamaru's song first.
Tatsuya didn't pay attention to the song. He let Jin,Kame and Yamapi talk about it. He was in deep thoughts. Ryo is getting married tomorrow. He knows he already told Ryo that he should continue his weeding but he can't help but feel hurt.
"Uhmmm... Tat-chan, I think this is for you..." Kame said.
Tatsuya looked up and saw Kame giving him a piece of paper. He took it and read what was written.
Tatsuya,
I'm sorry if I used this song to tell you everything I wanted. This is my way of expressing True Love. I love you forever.
-Ryo.
Attached to the letter were the lyrics of the song. Kame played it.
I never meant the things I said
To make you cry
Can I say I'm sorry
It's hard to forget
And yes I regret
All these mistakes
*** Ryo is asking sorry for whatever he has said in the past. He knows that though it wasn't the real him who said those words, it still hurt Tatsuya.
I don't know why you're leaving Me
But I know you must have your reasons
There's tears in your eyes
I watch as you cry
But it's getting late
*** This is about Tatsuya asking him to leave him alone.
Was I invading in on your secrets
Was I too close for comfort
You're pushing me out
When I'm wanting in
What was I just about to discover
When I got too close for comfort
Driving you home
Guess I'll never know
*** The chorus is about Ryo wanting to find out what Tatsuya wanted to tell him when they had dinner. He wanted to be a part of Tatsuya forever but Tatsuya doesn't want him to. The last time is about not knowing what Tatsuya really feels.
Remember when we scratched our names into the sand
And told me you loved me
But now that I find
That you've changed your mind
I'm lost for words
And everything I feel for you
I wrote down on one piece of paper
The one in your hand
You won't understand
How much it hurts to let you go
*** The first two lines, Ryo describe what he saw Tatsuya write in the sand when they were in Okinawa. When Tatsuya told him he doesn't love him, he doesn't know how to react. To be able to tell Tatsuya everything that he feels, he wrote this song so that the other will know how hard it is for him to let him go.
Was I invading in on your secrets
Was I too close for comfort
You're pushing me out
When I'm wanting in
What was I just about to discover
I got too close for comfort
Driving you home
Guess I'll never know
All this time you've been telling me lies
Hidden in bags that are under your eyes
And when I asked you I knew I was right
But if you turn your back on me now
When I need you most
But you chose to let me down
Won't you think about what you're about to do to me
And back down...
***Ryo's telling Tatsuya that he still believes that he's lying. That he knows that he loves him as much as he does.
Was I invading in on your secrets
Was I too close for comfort
You're pushing me out
When I'm wanting in
What was I just about to discover
I got too close for comfort
You're pushing me out
When I'm wanting in
(Yeh yeh yeh)
What was I just about to discover
When I got too close for comfort
Driving you home
I guess I'll never know...
While listening to the song and reading the lyrics, Tatsuya can't help but cry. Hearing Ryo's voice sing those words made him weak. Trusting his insticts, he stood up and ran out of the apartment.
Yamapi tried to run after him but Jin and Kame stopped him.
Tatsuya took the 1st cab that stopped in front of their apartment.
"To Osaka please." He said.
******
Ryo was at his old room. It was different than his room back in Tokyo. This one is small and a lot of things are on the way but he likes this room more than his new one. This is where he and Tatsuya used to hang-out together.
He opened his bedside drawer and found a cd. The cd that he was supposed to give Tatsuya during his birthday 10 years ago. He put it in his player and played it. He listened to it and he can't help but laugh a bit at how his voice sounded but then, this song was supposed to tell Tatsuya that Ryo loves him so much but that didn't happen.
Ryo reached for another cd in his bag. The cd that Yamapi gave him which contains the song that Tatsuya wrote for him. He listened to it too. It was clear in that song that Tatsuya loved him to. When the chorus part came, Ryo searched his bag for the recatngular box with the necklace. He took it out and had a realization.
When he first listened to the song, He doesn't understand why the line: You don't wear my chains meant but now, he knows the reason why that line was there.
It was because of the necklace. Tatsuya wanted him to have that necklace.
******
Tatsuya was a few blocks away from Ryo's house but he's been stuck in traffic. He decided to get out of the cab and just run the remaining blocks. He reached the house of Ryo's parents and noticed that a number of people were gathering there. He saw his mom talking with Ryo's mom. He hid behind the trees and slowly made his way at the back of the house.
He checked if someone else was there and when the surroundings were clear, he looked up to Ryo's room. He saw the other looking out the window but after a few seconds, he was gone. Tatsuya knows that there's a back door in Ryo's house so he made his way in and immediately ran towards Ryo's room. Everyone in the house were busy to notice him come in.
He knocked on Ryo's door and when the other opened it, he was surprised to see Tatsuya.
"Can I come in?" Tatsuya asked.
Ryo let him in and before closing the door, he made sure no one saw Tatsuya.
"Ryo...I--"
"Why are you here?" Ryo asked
Tatsuya pressed his lips to Ryo's. Ryo was shocked at the sudden action but he didn't resist. After a while, Tatsuya pulled back.
"The song..." Tatusya said.
"I'm getting married tomorrow." Ryo suddenly cut him off.
Tatsuya froze in his place. Reality just hit him. Tears started to form in the corner of his eyes.
"Please don't cry, Tatsuya." Ryo said when he saw the look on Tatsuya's face.
"No, I'm not. I'm sorry I did this." Tatsuya said. He tried his best to hold back his tears but a few drops fell on his cheeks which he immediately wiped with his hands.
Ryo went to his bed and retrieved the box with the necklace. He showed it to Tatsuya.
"How did you get that?" Tatsuya asked
"You dropped it when you bumped the old man." Ryo said.
"I also have this." Ryo played the cd and Tatsuya heard his voice.
"Why do you have that?" He asked Ryo.
"Yamapi gave it to me. This is the reason I don't believe you when you told me you don't love me. The truth is in this song. And this..."
Ryo showed him the necklace.
"This is another proof. This is the chain you were talking about in the song right?"
Tatsuya just stared at him.
Ryo grabbed the other cd.
"I was supposed to give this to you on your birthday 10 years ago." Ryo said.
"What is it?"
"It's a song I wrote for you."
A knock interrupted them.
"Who is it?" Ryo asked.
"It's mom dear. We need you downstairs. Aya's already there." Ryo's mom said.
"I'll be there mom."
"Okay dear." his mom said then left.
"Ryo can I have it? Please?" Tatsuya asked
Ryo gave him the cd.
"I wrote that song for you and for you alone. The words there are true." Ryo said.
Tasuya just nodded.
"I need to go down." Ryo said.
"Uhm. I'll go ahead."
Ryo stared at him then pulled him for a hug.
"I love you, Tatsuya but this is for the best right?" Ryo asked.
"Uhm." Tatsuya agreed.
When Ryo broke the hug, he went out ahead of Tatsuya. After a few minutes, Tatsuya also went out but he exited the house through the backdoor so no one will know he was there.
He walked towards their house and saw his father locking the front door.
"Tatsuya?" His dad said when he saw him.
"Dad..."
"Why are you here? Is there something wrong?" His dad asked
"Where are you going?" Tatsuya asked
"To the Nishikido's. Ryo's getting married tomorrow. Do you want to come with me? I'm sure they'll be happy to see you."
"No Dad. I'll just stay here. I want to rest."
Seeing that his son looks so down, he didn't ask him anymore. He gave Tatsuya the keys and made his way to the Nishikidos.
Tatsuya entered the house and went straight to his bedroom. His mother didn't change anything in his room. He looked for his old cd player and put the cd
that Ryo gave him. He played it.
Ima boku yori hitotsu futatsu saki wo susundeta kimi no shouko ga
Ukibori ni natteku chinmoku yabutte kureru kara
Chigau dareka no hanashi de geragera moriagatteru furi shite
Demo sono egao mada mitetai kara kotoba nomikomu
**The proof of you advancing one or two steps further than me
Has been etched like an embossed carving which has broken the silence
I see you laughing loudly at someone else's jokes as if you're enjoying yourself, but it's all an act
But because I want to see your smile, I swallow my words down
??#%?…?
Yeah yeah yeah yeah...
Yeah yeah yeah yeah...
Ima ijou wo hoshigaru boku wa
Seken shirazu na gaki desuka?
Motomeru yori mo ataero to satosu no desuka?
Eien nante nai yo to kensei shitemo ii
Demo boku wa ne hikatte mitai tomo ni
Tatoe isshun dake demo
**For me who wants more than what I have now
Am I like a kid who knows nothing about the world?
Am I being admonished for waiting for something to be given to me rather than pursuing it for myself?
It's fine even if there's a constraint such as "there is no such thing as 'eternity'"
I'd still want the both of us to shine
Even if it's only for an instant
??#%?…?
Yeah yeah yeah yeah...
Yeah yeah yeah yeah...
Kimi wo irodoru subete no youso wo boku ga mamotte mise you
Nani ga atte mo soba ni iyou
Kimi ga kanashimu subete no youso wa boku ga ubau kara
Mou sukoshi dake ai wo
Ai wo Ai wo
**I'll show you that I can protect all the elements that make you you
No matter what happens, I'll be by your side
I'll snatch all the elements of your sadness away
So believe a little bit more in love
In love, in love
Afuredasu kotoba omoikitte itta
"AISHITERU..." no hazu ga
Nou kara no shirei wo mata muishiki ni
Boku dake no angou ni kaete
**The overflowing words that I boldly said
Should have been "I love you"
But once again the instructions from my brain unconsciously
Turned it into a code that is mine and mine alone
??#%?…?
Yeah yeah yeah yeah...
Yeah yeah yeah yeah...
Kimi ni mune hatte kono omoi
Todokerareru hi wa kuru kana?
Dareka ni hokoreru boku de irareru kana?
Kimi ga iru no nara
Nandatte kanaerareru sonna ki ga suru kara
Todokeru ne ai wo
Ai wo
**If I wear my feelings upon my sleeve
Will there be a day when these feelings will reach you?
Will I be someone that you can boast about to someone else?
Because you're here
It feels as though anything can come true
So my love will reach you won't it?
My love will...
Kimi wo irodoru subete no youso wo boku ga mamotte mise you
Nani ga atte mo soba ni iyou
Kimi ga kanashimu subete no youso wa boku ga ubau kara
Arittake no ai wo
Ai wo Ai wo
**I'll show you that I can protect all the elements that make you you
No matter what happens, I'll be by your side
I'll snatch all the elements of your sadness away
With all the love [that I have]
All the love I have
??#%?…?
Yeah yeah yeah yeah...
Yeah yeah yeah yeah...
Tatsuya lay on his bed as he listened to Ryo's song. He cried and cried as the song played over and over again until he fell asleep.
Here's the video of the song.
A/N!!! Waaaa~ SORRY if this is angsty ne? Throw whatever you want. I'll accept them. I thought i already wrote the longest chapter for my last update but I'm
soooooo wrong. THIS IS SUPER LONG! I'm so sorry! I hope you listened to the song. That song has been playing in my mind for a week now. I adore Mc FLy since 2006 and this my favorite song from them. The title is Too Close for Comfort.
PS:
*** are my notes about the meaning of the song that Ryo wrote
** is the English translation of Ryo's song, Code.
Pairing: RYODA
Rating: pg13
Genre: Angst? Romance?
Summary: Ryo and Tatsuya have been best friends since they were young but unknown to Tatsuya, Ryo is in love with him. One day, something happened which made Ryo wish that he and Tatsuya were never friends and that he has all grown up. What happens when he wakes up one morning, all grown up without Tatsuya by his side?
Disclaimer: Ryo belongs to NEWS and KANJANI while Ueda belongs to KAT-TUN. *though I wish they own each other*
Warning: the story's inspired by the movie. 13 going on 30. *yeah. The one that stars Jennifer Garner*
Tatsuya didn't say a word.
"What else do you need to tell me Ryo? I understand. You're getting married! Congratulations, okay? Please get out of my way." Tatsuya said.
"Tatsuya, no. I won't marry her. I love you!" Ryo said
"Please stop. I'm not dumb Ryo. You don't love me, okay? You never did and you never will. You hate me. You hate me because I chose Yamapi instead of you.
Let's end it at that. Let's not make it difficult. Let's go back to hating each other." Tatsuya said.
"What are you talking about? I never hated you for siding Yamapi before!" Ryo said.
"Really? Then explain to me why everything changed after that day." Tatsuya said
Ryo can't give him a reply. Though he knows that he never hated Tatsuya, the other won't believe him. The Ryo that Tatsuya knows is different from who he is.
That Ryo hated Tatsuya so much.
"Tatsuya...I'm not that Ryo anymore!"
"I don't care. I finally decided that we really can never go back to what we were before. That we can't even be friends. The most that we can do is to be
civil with each other." Tatsuya said.
"Tatsuya, I know you love me too...Please..."
Tatsuya's tears kept on pouring.
"Love you? How can I love someone like you? I would NEVER love you." Tatsuya said. As he said those words, he felt like his heart was being torn into pieces.
"But Yamapi--"
"Yamapi is the one I love the most!" Tatsuya suddenly said.
"What?" Ryo was surprised at what Tatsuya said.
"Yamapi is the only one I love." Tatsuya repeated.
"You're lying. You don't love Yamapi. He told me he only loves you like his brother." Ryo said
"He loves me as his brother but I love more than that. He's the only one who was there when I need someone to talk to. He was the one who took care of me each and every time I feel down. He's the only one who understands me and he's the only one whom I know would never leave me." Tatsuya said.
"I'll leave her. I'll leave her to be with you!" Ryo said.
"Don't be stupid! She loves you don't you see that? You'd leave her for what? Even if you do that, you won't have me because I don't love you. I can't love someone like you."
Tatsuya made his way past Ryo but the other ran after him and hugged him from behind.
"I know what you told me is all lies. I know you love me Tatsuya. I know it. I can see it in you eyes. I can feel it when we were together in Okinawa. Please don't lie." Ryo said.
Tatsuya placed his hands on Ryo's hands and tried to pull it away slowly.
"Ryo, please? I’m tired. I want to go home. Please..." Tatsuya said calmly.
Ryo didn't want to let him go but he knows it would be better if they talk some other time. He slowly let go of Tatsuya. When Ryo's arms were no longer stopping him, Tatsuya ran as fast as he can. While running, he suddenly bumped into an old man. He just said a quick apology and continued to run.
The old man found a box that dropped from Tatsuya's bag. He was about to give it back but Tatsuya was already gone. Ryo saw what happened and approached the old man.
"Ah, sorry for that sir. He's just in a hurry." Ryo said.
"It's okay. He did apologize and it seems he had something urgent. You know him?" The old man asked
"Uhmmm...Yes."
"He dropped this.” The old man gave Ryo the box.
"Thank you, sir"
"I'd go ahead." The old man said and left him.
Ryo kept the box with him and walked around the city for a while before heading back to his apartment.
******
Tatsuya called Yamapi as soon as he came back to his apartment. The other came knocking on his door a few minutes later.
"Tatsuya? What happened?" Yamapi asked. Tatsuya was sitting on the floor crying.
"Pi, I'm so stupid. I didn't know he's getting married. I was going to tell him everything but his fiance showed up and...And everything went so fast. She was kissing him and then telling me they're getting married. I couldn't take it so I excused myself."
Yamapi knelt beside him and hugged him.
"I'm sorry Tatsuya. I'm sorry I wasn't there to protect you..." Yamapi said.
******
When he came home, Aya was already sleeping on their bed. He took a long shower and thought of the things that happened that night. He was so angry at himself. Why didn't he tell Tatsuya about Aya earlier? He curses himself.
He went out of the bathroom and remembered the box which Tatsuya dropped. He grabbed it from the table then sat on the sofa. He opened the box and saw the globe necklace. He took the necklace out of the box and inspected every inch of it.
He took a closer look when he noticed that something was written on the pendant.
*You are the reason my heart keeps on beating... I Love You, Ryo.*
He knew it. This is the proof that Tatsuya was lying to him earlier. He placed the necklace inside the box again and kept it. He has decided that tomorrow, he'll talk to Tatsuya.
******
Another meeting will be held that day and Ryo was early. There was still an hour left before the meeting but someone was banging on his door. Thinking that
it was Nakamaru and Koki, he opened it.
A fist landed on his face and he was on the floor. The guy who punched him grabbed him by his collar and pulled him up.
"I told you right? I told you I'd kill you if you hurt him!" Yamapi said.
"I didn't mean to--"
"That's bullshit Nishikido! I knew it, I shouldn't have trusted you! Do you know what you did to him? Huh? He feels like you've killed him!" Yamapi said.
"I'm willing to leave her for him! I tried to tell him that!" Ryo said.
"Leave her and let Tatsuya feel guilty? What the hell is wrong with you?"
"No. I love him!"
"Don't you ever come near him again!"
"I want to talk to him!"
"No! I will make sure you will never see him again!" Yamapi said.
"Pi!"
A call from behind came. Both Ryo and Yamapi looked at the owner of the voice. It was Tatsuya.
"Tatsuya? Why are you here?" Yamapi asked
"Pi, let go of him. Please..." Tatsuya said.
Yamapi let go of Ryo harshly.
"Tatsuya, let's talk, please..." Ryo said.
"I don't want to see you again Ryo. Leave me alone." Tatsuya said.
"But you love me. I know you love me I have--"
"How many times do I have to tell you that I don’t? Stop convincing yourself that I love you!"
"I--"
"Your girlfriend loves you! Don't you see that?"
"But I don't love her!"
"Why would you ask her hand for marriage if you don't love her?"
"Because--I ---I don't know...."
"You love her, Ryo. You just think you love me but you really don't. Please don't see me again." Tatsuya said.
Tatsuya pulled Yamapi out of the office but Ryo called him again.
"Tatsuya..."
"Goodbye Ryo..." Tatsuya said and he left with Yamapi.
When Tatsuya left, Ryo sat on the couch and cried.
Tatsuya kept on pulling Yamapi with him and would ignore the other's calls. Yamapi stopped walking and pulled Tatsuya closer to him.
"Cry if you want to." Yamapi said.
When he said this, Tatsuya hugged him and his tears started to pour down his eyes.
"I did the right thing right?" Tatsuya asked
Yamapi didn't answer. He just hugged Tatsuya like that.
Tatsuya and Yamapi weren't present in the meeting as well as Ryo. Ryo told Junno to tell the others that he wasn't feeling well while Tatsuya and Yamapi called in sick.
A week has passed and they tried their best to get on with their lives. Ryo still thinks of Tatsuya all the time while Tatsuya asked Yamapi to keep him company so that he won't have the chance to think of Ryo. They haven't seen each other since that day because Yamapi won't let Tatsuya go to T&T office even if it's for their song. All of the meetings are attended by Jin and Kame and they would just tell Yamapi what happens.
Jin and Kame came knocking on Tatsuya's door.
"Yo!" Jin greeted.
"How was it?" Yamapi asked as he let the two in.
"Same as usual. Ryo' still not there." Jin said
Ryo has always been absent in the meetings too. It's always Nakamaru and Koki who they've been talking with.
"So what did say?" Yamapi asked
"As soon as Ryo sends the song, they'll mail it to us." Kame said
"And when is that?"
"They're expecting the song from Ryo today and they'll send it first thing in the morning."
Tatsuya just sat and listened to his friends talk about their work.
******
Ryo has been playing the song that he wrote for the past hour. He's had it on replay. He recorded and sang the song which he'll send to Tatsuya. He knows that the theme was supposed to "True Love" and when you hear that word, it's supposed to have a feel good feeling to it but then, this is his way of expressing "True Love". Tatsuya is his True Love and these are the words he wanted to tell him.
******
The four of them gathered at Jin and Kame's apartment. Nakamaru and Koki were coming that morning to deliver the songs to them. After a few minutes the two arrived. kama and Jin invited them in but they declined
"Are you sure? It'll be great if you're here when we listen to it." Kame said
"Ah... We still need to go back to Osaka." Nakamaru said
"Eh? You're going home?" Kame asked.
They were high school classmates and all of them came from Osaka.
"Oh, yeah. We're helping in Ryo and Aya's wedding. It'll be tomorrow." Koki said
Tatsuya slightly jumped on his seat when he heard what Maru said. He didn't know that Ryo's wedding was tomorrow. Nakamaru and Koki left after that. Kame brought the cd with him and put it on the player. They listened to Koki and Nakamaru's song first.
Tatsuya didn't pay attention to the song. He let Jin,Kame and Yamapi talk about it. He was in deep thoughts. Ryo is getting married tomorrow. He knows he already told Ryo that he should continue his weeding but he can't help but feel hurt.
"Uhmmm... Tat-chan, I think this is for you..." Kame said.
Tatsuya looked up and saw Kame giving him a piece of paper. He took it and read what was written.
Tatsuya,
I'm sorry if I used this song to tell you everything I wanted. This is my way of expressing True Love. I love you forever.
-Ryo.
Attached to the letter were the lyrics of the song. Kame played it.
I never meant the things I said
To make you cry
Can I say I'm sorry
It's hard to forget
And yes I regret
All these mistakes
*** Ryo is asking sorry for whatever he has said in the past. He knows that though it wasn't the real him who said those words, it still hurt Tatsuya.
I don't know why you're leaving Me
But I know you must have your reasons
There's tears in your eyes
I watch as you cry
But it's getting late
*** This is about Tatsuya asking him to leave him alone.
Was I invading in on your secrets
Was I too close for comfort
You're pushing me out
When I'm wanting in
What was I just about to discover
When I got too close for comfort
Driving you home
Guess I'll never know
*** The chorus is about Ryo wanting to find out what Tatsuya wanted to tell him when they had dinner. He wanted to be a part of Tatsuya forever but Tatsuya doesn't want him to. The last time is about not knowing what Tatsuya really feels.
Remember when we scratched our names into the sand
And told me you loved me
But now that I find
That you've changed your mind
I'm lost for words
And everything I feel for you
I wrote down on one piece of paper
The one in your hand
You won't understand
How much it hurts to let you go
*** The first two lines, Ryo describe what he saw Tatsuya write in the sand when they were in Okinawa. When Tatsuya told him he doesn't love him, he doesn't know how to react. To be able to tell Tatsuya everything that he feels, he wrote this song so that the other will know how hard it is for him to let him go.
Was I invading in on your secrets
Was I too close for comfort
You're pushing me out
When I'm wanting in
What was I just about to discover
I got too close for comfort
Driving you home
Guess I'll never know
All this time you've been telling me lies
Hidden in bags that are under your eyes
And when I asked you I knew I was right
But if you turn your back on me now
When I need you most
But you chose to let me down
Won't you think about what you're about to do to me
And back down...
***Ryo's telling Tatsuya that he still believes that he's lying. That he knows that he loves him as much as he does.
Was I invading in on your secrets
Was I too close for comfort
You're pushing me out
When I'm wanting in
What was I just about to discover
I got too close for comfort
You're pushing me out
When I'm wanting in
(Yeh yeh yeh)
What was I just about to discover
When I got too close for comfort
Driving you home
I guess I'll never know...
While listening to the song and reading the lyrics, Tatsuya can't help but cry. Hearing Ryo's voice sing those words made him weak. Trusting his insticts, he stood up and ran out of the apartment.
Yamapi tried to run after him but Jin and Kame stopped him.
Tatsuya took the 1st cab that stopped in front of their apartment.
"To Osaka please." He said.
******
Ryo was at his old room. It was different than his room back in Tokyo. This one is small and a lot of things are on the way but he likes this room more than his new one. This is where he and Tatsuya used to hang-out together.
He opened his bedside drawer and found a cd. The cd that he was supposed to give Tatsuya during his birthday 10 years ago. He put it in his player and played it. He listened to it and he can't help but laugh a bit at how his voice sounded but then, this song was supposed to tell Tatsuya that Ryo loves him so much but that didn't happen.
Ryo reached for another cd in his bag. The cd that Yamapi gave him which contains the song that Tatsuya wrote for him. He listened to it too. It was clear in that song that Tatsuya loved him to. When the chorus part came, Ryo searched his bag for the recatngular box with the necklace. He took it out and had a realization.
When he first listened to the song, He doesn't understand why the line: You don't wear my chains meant but now, he knows the reason why that line was there.
It was because of the necklace. Tatsuya wanted him to have that necklace.
******
Tatsuya was a few blocks away from Ryo's house but he's been stuck in traffic. He decided to get out of the cab and just run the remaining blocks. He reached the house of Ryo's parents and noticed that a number of people were gathering there. He saw his mom talking with Ryo's mom. He hid behind the trees and slowly made his way at the back of the house.
He checked if someone else was there and when the surroundings were clear, he looked up to Ryo's room. He saw the other looking out the window but after a few seconds, he was gone. Tatsuya knows that there's a back door in Ryo's house so he made his way in and immediately ran towards Ryo's room. Everyone in the house were busy to notice him come in.
He knocked on Ryo's door and when the other opened it, he was surprised to see Tatsuya.
"Can I come in?" Tatsuya asked.
Ryo let him in and before closing the door, he made sure no one saw Tatsuya.
"Ryo...I--"
"Why are you here?" Ryo asked
Tatsuya pressed his lips to Ryo's. Ryo was shocked at the sudden action but he didn't resist. After a while, Tatsuya pulled back.
"The song..." Tatusya said.
"I'm getting married tomorrow." Ryo suddenly cut him off.
Tatsuya froze in his place. Reality just hit him. Tears started to form in the corner of his eyes.
"Please don't cry, Tatsuya." Ryo said when he saw the look on Tatsuya's face.
"No, I'm not. I'm sorry I did this." Tatsuya said. He tried his best to hold back his tears but a few drops fell on his cheeks which he immediately wiped with his hands.
Ryo went to his bed and retrieved the box with the necklace. He showed it to Tatsuya.
"How did you get that?" Tatsuya asked
"You dropped it when you bumped the old man." Ryo said.
"I also have this." Ryo played the cd and Tatsuya heard his voice.
"Why do you have that?" He asked Ryo.
"Yamapi gave it to me. This is the reason I don't believe you when you told me you don't love me. The truth is in this song. And this..."
Ryo showed him the necklace.
"This is another proof. This is the chain you were talking about in the song right?"
Tatsuya just stared at him.
Ryo grabbed the other cd.
"I was supposed to give this to you on your birthday 10 years ago." Ryo said.
"What is it?"
"It's a song I wrote for you."
A knock interrupted them.
"Who is it?" Ryo asked.
"It's mom dear. We need you downstairs. Aya's already there." Ryo's mom said.
"I'll be there mom."
"Okay dear." his mom said then left.
"Ryo can I have it? Please?" Tatsuya asked
Ryo gave him the cd.
"I wrote that song for you and for you alone. The words there are true." Ryo said.
Tasuya just nodded.
"I need to go down." Ryo said.
"Uhm. I'll go ahead."
Ryo stared at him then pulled him for a hug.
"I love you, Tatsuya but this is for the best right?" Ryo asked.
"Uhm." Tatsuya agreed.
When Ryo broke the hug, he went out ahead of Tatsuya. After a few minutes, Tatsuya also went out but he exited the house through the backdoor so no one will know he was there.
He walked towards their house and saw his father locking the front door.
"Tatsuya?" His dad said when he saw him.
"Dad..."
"Why are you here? Is there something wrong?" His dad asked
"Where are you going?" Tatsuya asked
"To the Nishikido's. Ryo's getting married tomorrow. Do you want to come with me? I'm sure they'll be happy to see you."
"No Dad. I'll just stay here. I want to rest."
Seeing that his son looks so down, he didn't ask him anymore. He gave Tatsuya the keys and made his way to the Nishikidos.
Tatsuya entered the house and went straight to his bedroom. His mother didn't change anything in his room. He looked for his old cd player and put the cd
that Ryo gave him. He played it.
Ima boku yori hitotsu futatsu saki wo susundeta kimi no shouko ga
Ukibori ni natteku chinmoku yabutte kureru kara
Chigau dareka no hanashi de geragera moriagatteru furi shite
Demo sono egao mada mitetai kara kotoba nomikomu
**The proof of you advancing one or two steps further than me
Has been etched like an embossed carving which has broken the silence
I see you laughing loudly at someone else's jokes as if you're enjoying yourself, but it's all an act
But because I want to see your smile, I swallow my words down
??#%?…?
Yeah yeah yeah yeah...
Yeah yeah yeah yeah...
Ima ijou wo hoshigaru boku wa
Seken shirazu na gaki desuka?
Motomeru yori mo ataero to satosu no desuka?
Eien nante nai yo to kensei shitemo ii
Demo boku wa ne hikatte mitai tomo ni
Tatoe isshun dake demo
**For me who wants more than what I have now
Am I like a kid who knows nothing about the world?
Am I being admonished for waiting for something to be given to me rather than pursuing it for myself?
It's fine even if there's a constraint such as "there is no such thing as 'eternity'"
I'd still want the both of us to shine
Even if it's only for an instant
??#%?…?
Yeah yeah yeah yeah...
Yeah yeah yeah yeah...
Kimi wo irodoru subete no youso wo boku ga mamotte mise you
Nani ga atte mo soba ni iyou
Kimi ga kanashimu subete no youso wa boku ga ubau kara
Mou sukoshi dake ai wo
Ai wo Ai wo
**I'll show you that I can protect all the elements that make you you
No matter what happens, I'll be by your side
I'll snatch all the elements of your sadness away
So believe a little bit more in love
In love, in love
Afuredasu kotoba omoikitte itta
"AISHITERU..." no hazu ga
Nou kara no shirei wo mata muishiki ni
Boku dake no angou ni kaete
**The overflowing words that I boldly said
Should have been "I love you"
But once again the instructions from my brain unconsciously
Turned it into a code that is mine and mine alone
??#%?…?
Yeah yeah yeah yeah...
Yeah yeah yeah yeah...
Kimi ni mune hatte kono omoi
Todokerareru hi wa kuru kana?
Dareka ni hokoreru boku de irareru kana?
Kimi ga iru no nara
Nandatte kanaerareru sonna ki ga suru kara
Todokeru ne ai wo
Ai wo
**If I wear my feelings upon my sleeve
Will there be a day when these feelings will reach you?
Will I be someone that you can boast about to someone else?
Because you're here
It feels as though anything can come true
So my love will reach you won't it?
My love will...
Kimi wo irodoru subete no youso wo boku ga mamotte mise you
Nani ga atte mo soba ni iyou
Kimi ga kanashimu subete no youso wa boku ga ubau kara
Arittake no ai wo
Ai wo Ai wo
**I'll show you that I can protect all the elements that make you you
No matter what happens, I'll be by your side
I'll snatch all the elements of your sadness away
With all the love [that I have]
All the love I have
??#%?…?
Yeah yeah yeah yeah...
Yeah yeah yeah yeah...
Tatsuya lay on his bed as he listened to Ryo's song. He cried and cried as the song played over and over again until he fell asleep.
Here's the video of the song.
Click to viewA/N!!! Waaaa~ SORRY if this is angsty ne? Throw whatever you want. I'll accept them. I thought i already wrote the longest chapter for my last update but I'm
soooooo wrong. THIS IS SUPER LONG! I'm so sorry! I hope you listened to the song. That song has been playing in my mind for a week now. I adore Mc FLy since 2006 and this my favorite song from them. The title is Too Close for Comfort.
PS:
*** are my notes about the meaning of the song that Ryo wrote
** is the English translation of Ryo's song, Code.