As the Torch Turns
The subject of soap operas came up recently, and I had a thought -- wow, Torchwood would make a great soap! So I'd love it for someone to write an a/u with TW in soap style. A crazy, crack parody of soaps (it's been while since I've seen any, but popular culture often pokes fun at them). It would be too funny! Bonus points if they're recognizable and not totally OOC.
Note: I understand not everyone's humor is the same so remember these ideas are meant to be parody and poke good natured fun at everyone. I'm not looking for a bash fic.
Here's a few ideas I came up with:
Gwen would probably get pregnant as a result of the affair with Owen, and Rhys would have an affair with Andy in retaliation.
Ianto gets to bitch-slap Gwen when she's trying to sit with Jack after Abaddon.
Maybe Suzie could be in a looong coma (coma is a common soap parody), but comes out of it every so often to cause trouble as she's the evil soap diva -- then falls back into coma again (echoing Suzies coming back in the show).
Since characters killed off can turn out not to be dead in soaps too, Ianto could come back (from wherever he's been, maybe faking his death so he can do a Bond-like spy thing for the gov't) to find Jack shacked up with Alonso. In a fit of jealousy he pulls a gun and shoots Alonso. Jack takes the fall and does the time in prison for him. In the meantime Gwen finds out her baby is really Rhys' after all...
Feel free to use or disregard any of the over-the-top suggestions. What else soap-like could happen??
PS: or if this theme has already been done, do point me to it. Thanks.