[FIC] : Haru's Story
CHAPTER 5
Junnosuke sighed as he gazed upon his reflection on the mirror as he fixed his neck tie that perfectly suits to his formal attire. He knew that day would be one of his busiest day imagining those stockpile results of some test he needs to study about and how many patients have waited at him in Jutendo.
People in different ages, in every ward of the hospital have been certainly looking for him since he had gone to rest for a day. He was considered as a most-experienced physician yet too young for that achievement on the line of the resident doctors at Jutendo. Almost all the people in the hospital loved the young physician aside from his pleasing appearance; he always made everyone smile by saying his famous introduction ‘ireguchi deguchi Taguchi desu!’
Smile though your heart is aching
Smile even though it's breaking
When there are clouds in the sky, you'll get by
If you smile through your fear and sorrow
Smile and maybe tomorrow
You'll see the sun come shining through for you
The man crafted a embittered smile down on his face when he heard the song of Natalie Cole surpasses his ears. The song about having hopes despite of failures. That song made him gained more courage. But even if tons of hope he would obtained, still the reality would just brush them off like a falling single dried leaf away from its tree. Smile, even though you’re dying inside. Happiness will be the one who will come to you, knocking on your door in a very unexpected way.
The trains of thoughts were cut off as his phone rang.
“Moshi----“
“I’ll arrive at Nippon few hours from now,” a feminine voice cast her words firmly.
“Do you want me to fetch you at the airport?” Junno asked.
“No, need Junnosuke, I just called to ask if he’s okay,”
Junno grabbed the air from his lungs, to elicit the answer she needs. “Still no developments, but he’s okay for now,”
*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*
Jutendo Hospital, Tokyo, Japan
June 11, 2007
2:00 pm
Kazu meets a man under the downpour…
Jin smiles frailly as he flipped Kazuya’s note book slowly, reading every short notes written in those pages. The every moment he and Kazuya had and the thought of it made him smile. He had the joy of thinking that Kazuya didn’t want to forget him--- so he saved him there in his notebook.
Haru takes the responsibility to keep every Kazuya’s memories down on her pages. Haru had Kazuya’s memories in Jutendo in the past two years and he also wrote about his syndrome but just in the form of a short note. He’s wondering why just short notes? Why can’t he write longer and more precise so he could clearly remember the events? Jin continued to turn over the pages until he noticed a folded paper between sheets.
He unfolded the crumpled paper, “Music sheet?” Jin thought behind his mind as he scanned the paper that said to be a music sheet. He seeks for the title of the composition but he found out nothing.
“Jin,”
The tall man froze down to his spine as he heard his name from the young man who just got stirred up from his sleep. His heartbeat dashed out of happiness but he remained cooled outside “Eh? You know me?”
“Of course.. It’s written on that pendant.” Kazuya smiled mischievously, lazily looking at Jin’s pendant, hanging on his necklace.
With a pinch of disappointment that ruined his joy, Jin smiled also then held the pendant in his hand “Ah,” he came to respond.
Kazuya hesitantly stretched his hand to reach the pendant, “Made from a good quality of white gold isn’t?”
Jin nodded “Yeah, it’s from----“
“Your girlfriend?” Kazuya uttered the possible answer to his question.
The words from the young man made him walk reminisced his past. He looked upon the fingers on the pendant that almost caressing his chest then threw his gaze to Kazuya who’s eyeing the pendant, but instead of uttering his responds to that, he held Kazuya’s hand and assisted him to haul up from the bed.
“Wanna eat something? I prepared cup noodles,” Jin handed the cup placed to a table near the open window, letting the wind to sweep the smoke dancing above the luscious noodles.
“But… hey! Why you’re here in my room?” and it was the bratty Kazuya he’d need to face everyday. After his first night in Jin’s room, Kazuya would always go there (when he wakes up) and almost kicked him out of the room and keep saying it was his. But seems anyone would try to peek would say it’s his room seeing almost all his things there. Taguchi-san had talked it about to him and apologize of the latter actions and it the end, they’d let the younger be since Jin said it was okay to him, Kazuya is welcome as always.
“Drop by to say hello to you.” Jin said, realizing that having a war with Kazuya about the room was a waste. Since at the end of everything, he can’t resist a grumpy Kazuya. Too cute.
While sipping the noodle, Kazuya suddenly asked Jin who also too busy digging his noodles “Ano, did you see---“
“Haru? She’s here,” Jin smiled sweetly.
“You know my Haru?” Kazuya was surprised on how Jin found out about his Haru.
“Not much,” Jin says as he chomps the noodles.
“Haru is a great friend of mine,” Kazuya reached Haru on the side table and put it on his embrace. “She held a huge part of me and---“
“You’re not complete without her,” Jin barged in as he ended the phrase exactly as how the younger said it couple of times.
Kazuya nodded as he began to flipped the pages “Hai, though I’m not sure how she means to me, but I’m very hooked up, reading every pages of her every morning and maybe this is one of the reasons,”
Jutendo Hospital, Tokyo, Japan
November 20, 2005
10:32 am
Kazu has selective memory lose syndrome…. He can’t ever keep memories anymore, he entrusted Haru every inch of his fading memories.
“Well, after seeing this note, I know she means a lot to me because she’s there to keep my memories since I can’t keep it on my own,” Kazuya grinned widely and closed Haru again.
Jin suddenly felt agony hiding behind those gorgeous orbs, behind those sweet-innocent smiles. The pain that the younger one’s been hiding but it reaches Jin. He knows that it’s because of his disease that impaired Kazuya to have a normal life. Memories that hold the keys to free Kazuya from these agony.
*:*:*:*
A woman in her forties came out from an elegant Jaguar Land Rover. She took off her sunglasses as her eyes getting narrowed from the sunlight as she gazed above, looking at the name that have been treasured for years. The name that established a great reputation on the field of medicine: Jutendo.
She moved her feet gracefully with the four body guards behind her, going to the main entrance. The guard opened the door for the lady then gave respect to their superior. While taking her way to the polished hall way, the nurses and doctors came passed by, also bowed to the lady that signifies of having a higher position.
“Welcome back, Koyuki-san,” Junnosuke came to greet the woman.
But she just ignored his greeting, asking about, “Where is my son? Can I see him now?
*:*:*
“I won!” Kazuya raised both of his hands on the air, looking victoriously.
“Great three losses in a row for me,” Jin ran a frustrated hand into his scalp.
Kazuya chirped his victory song as he repositioned his last piece to defeat Jin in the chess board game. They’re playing since morning but Jin came up with no wins at all. Seems Kazuya didn’t let his guard off though it was a friendly match that drove Jin into a series of loses.
The younger cheerfully repositioned them to its appropriate places to start a new round when he suddenly paused then stared to another
man.
“What?” Jin asked, narrowing his brows.
He pouted as he palmed his stomach “I’m hungry~”
Jin chuckled then ruffled the younger’s hair “Wait for me here,” he can’t refuse this cute boy whining that he’s hungry so then he volunteered himself to go to the cafeteria to have some foods.
~~~~~~
“This necklace is the only key of my heart, so I asked the maker to in script your name on the pendant,” The woman he loves the most handed him a key-shaped pendant, dangling in a white-gold necklace.
He smiled “Why my name, instead of yours.”
“Because that name belongs to the one who owned my heart, just in case you might get lost it, they will know that it is yours…It simply says that I am yours. That I am Akanishi Jin’s property. Same with this one.” She showed him the exact pendant with the woman’s name written on it. “This will make me the key holder to your heart.”
“Thank you,” Jin leaned down to give her a passionate kiss.
~~~
“Do I still deserve to hold the key of your heart?” Jin took his breath to the deepest as he whispered to the chilly wind roaming inside the hospital.
“Don’t worry Koyuki-sensei., we make sure that we can attend to your son’s needs with our modern facilities….” Junno was cut off when he noticed that the woman beside him didn’t pay no heed to every of his words. He saw her froze in her spot, widening her eyes as if she saw a ghost, while they were on their way to her office. He looked at her, curious of something that bothered him as well. He followed her gaze… “Does she know him?. He saw a man walking not too far from them. It’s the one who caught her attention.
*:*:*:
“Itai! Take it easy Rin!”
Jin whined as Rin tap cold compress bag above his forehead. Jin was on his way to the cafeteria until his sight turned doubles and bumped to the wall. After spotting Jin yelping, Rin yanked Jin and went to Katsui-san’s clinic to check his forehead while the physician was out.
Rin noticed a bandage covering almost half of his middle finger. He got the wound while he was cleaning the shattered glass from the vase in Kazuya’s room. He noticed that it bleeds ceaselessly that almost all he touched by the finger getting stained of blood but he ignored it at all before Rin did pulled him.
“You mustn’t have it if I didn’t allow you to fix all the things inside Kazuya’s room… sorry” she uttered while tapping another cotton ball.
“Oh, don’t mind… it was not your fault, actually it me, but it’s alright anyway. I’ve taken away the sharp things that may hurt him,” he grinned widely.
“What’s between you and Kazuya?” Rin glanced with her suspicious eyes, while Jin was hoping that Rin would end her questions that are bugging her these past few days.
But he didn’t mind answering her “I don’t know.”
“Akanishi-san, I’m was thinking few minutes ago before heading here to go to your room, well I guess I don’t have to since I’ve already found you here in Katsui-san’s clinic,”
“Oi, Taguchi-san,” Jin smile at Junno while Rin’s question stayed behind the ceiling as the doctor abruptly took his entrance.
Nice timing Taguchi-san.
“Any problem?” the doctor peek to see what Rin is doing to the man’s forehead.
“Nothing, I just bumped at the wall near the orthopedic ward… but I’m okay,” he assured.
The doctor heaved a sigh. The signs were surfacing through short time. The doctors he had talked about Jin’s rear disease was agreed that Jin must go through the surgery as soon as possible, “Akanishi-san.. I need to discuss you something very important about your case,” he paused, observing the other one’s reaction. “We need to perform an operation as soon as possible like what I’ve told you before.. The hollow spaces of your skull need to be filled to prevent it from deteriorating.”
“B-but..” Jin bit his lip “What if it failed?” Jin was scared as hell as the thought about it recurred, feeling so desperate to have his live extend for more.
Junno massaged his temples, the tension was flying, he wasn’t sure too if it’ll succeed or not. A life is at stake here. But he knew to himself that he didn’t want to lose a life. He wanted to do it. “You said you’re counting on me right? You trusted me… please keep that till the end.”
:*:*:*:*
With his weakened knees, Jin came back to his room. His mind was preoccupied with his long forgotten past.. not only that.. his illness also. In that short time since he got admitted to this hospital but a lot of things changes. It’s like he’s running out of time. And his past is haunting him now. That his disease is his punishment of what he did before. But right now, he doesn’t want to lose any hope. He entrusted his life to anyone who can make miracles to happen, to make him live longer. Although that surgery wouldn’t give him a guarantee that he will survive… at least for now he’s holding into something.
Melody abruptly surpasses his both ears. Jin set a half smile to his lips as he eyed the fiddler played his violin, swaying his body through the song; it sounds illustrious, same song that he always wanted to hear in his music player.
Seeing footsteps of you walking away,
Leaving nothing but only hope
That you will be back to me
And will never walked away….
Please say you promise,
Promise to walk with me till the end
Until the nightfall embraces us,
I’ll be happy….
Jin sung the lines with all his heart to the familiar tone from Kazuya’s violin that caught the other one’s attention. He smiled and he just continued to make melody as he listen to Jin’s voice. Jin is such a wonderful singer, his voice is so gentle and strong as if he held an intense emotion in his heart that he could only be shown by singing.
“You knew that song?” Jin asked Kazuya as he was so impressed how Kazuya played the song with his violin. It’s exact as what he heard from the album.
“Un,” Kazuya happily nodded while bringing back his violin to its case “And you sung wonderfully, you could be a theater actor.”
“Well, actually my childhood dream is to become a theater actor …” he admitted as his cheeks begin to get red “But then, I chose to follow my dad’s dream on me to be the successor of our company,” he still had his dream to be a theater actor inside of him and it hurt him when he always remember that he sacrifices it for the dreams of his father for him.
Kazuya saw Jin’s sad expression he had on his flawless face as he closed the distance between them “It’s not too late to have that dream to be granted,” he muttered then have his arms around the taller one because he felt the sadness of this man and needed a hug, “You still have more time Jin… you’re still young,”
“Yes I’m, but I know my life wouldn’t be long as I’m wishing for…” Jin gave back the hug by encircling his arms to the other one’s waist, leaning his head to Kazuya’s shoulder while having that weird thump on his heart as always when near to him.
“I’m scared Kazuya…” Kazuya felt hot drops falling to his shoulders.
“Don’t be.. I’m just right here beside you.” He snaked his both arms around his broad shoulders.
“What if I never wake up after the operation? I don’t know what‘s gonna happen after that. If I’ll survive or not.” Jin’s tears already damped Kazuya’s clothes, he cried his all heart out, having no insecurities in Kazuya seeing this weak side of him because he trusted the younger and he didn’t longer care what the world will say if they would see him like this, he had Kazuya comforting him. That’s all that matter.
“Listen to me…” Kazuya cupped Jin’s face..eyeing his teary eyes. “Don’t let fear to rub out your hope… Of course you’ll survive… think about the ones you love… and think that you’ll be in usual life again after this,”
Kazuya detached himself and reached Haru at the side table “Haru thought me that when we are down.. there is always a way for us to get to the top. That sunshines comes right away after the rain. Maybe after this, you will have your normal life again. Be happy again with the ones who mattered to you the most. Unlike me, I am a prisoner of this hospital, a prisoner of my own memory. No matter how I tried to convince myself that everything is okay the way it is… It’s not actually. I already accept the fact that this is my fate.. Hospital as my home, and Haru as the only one I can trusts the most.. But you came. It changes the flow of how I want to live my own life. Haru told me you are my strength, one of the reasons why I smiled. It sounds greedy but I want us to be together always.“ Kazuya let his tears fall freely on his cheeks. Jin grabbed Kazuya in his arms again, trying to coax the younger one. Every word of him went straight to his heart. It gives him much more courage, enough to brush off his hesitations.
“and please think about me,” his words came so kind in his ears, as if he was pleading for Jin to do it. But in his heart, Kazuya didn’t need to say that, he had his spot in Jin’s heart and Jin only just realized it. The time went fast that he barely noticed that he’s falling in love.
How fool is he just to realize it by now? He’d fallen in love once but it was his first time being with a person like Kazuya. He’s just exceptional among the people he’d met. And here, in this desolated place, he is the only one he could be with. He’d learned and did things he’d never knew or done before that changed him as a person in that very time. Kazuya had done things to make him smile in every single day without the younger even noticed of how it could be.
“Anou.. I will let you write down on Haru. Anything.. you are free to write down all your thoughts on her. I know she won’t mind it any way.” Kazuya smiled at him, his eyes were shining that made Jin also to smile.
“Are you sure about that?” Jin was a bit reluctant because he knows how Haru matters to him.
“Of course!! Here.. take this.” Kazuya turned to the next blank page Haru. Drowned in hesitation, Jin gazed in Kazuya’s eyes, but the hesitations were vanished as Kazuya held his hands and put Haru on them. Soon, Jin got a pen and write as he told. Every word that he written transformed into hopes that in time, everything would be in settle. He glanced to the younger in his side then he smiled; Kazuya’s words also added the courage that had been blazed in his heart.
:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*
Life is like a dice that you can’t predict of what’s gonna be on top once it is rolling. A simple message that we have to be contented of what we have, even though life can be cruel at some certain extent. Because it will give us lessons, a lessons that will make you who you are even if you didn’t get the most number of points that the dice throws at you…
1. Aizen Festival
2. To make a thousands of paper crane
3. Watch the Lovers Moon stageplay
4. Live with monks for a week
5. Drive a bus
6. Bungee Jump
7. Buy an Egyptian mau cat as a pet
8. Plant hundreds of cherry blossom tree
9. Take pictures of tons of beautiful sunsets.
10. enjoy life…
Jin is looking at the list he made. Smiling at his bakaness when he wrote that list he wants to do the most.
He nuzzled his nose on the other one’s hair who’s sleeping so deep in the midst of the cold night. Jin tucked Kazuya in the blanket after he get himself up beside him. He packed all things he needed; extra clothes, money, water, and four cup noodles. He fixed all of them in a backpack. After he stripped his pajamas then changed it to pants and v-neck shirt, Jin put the bag behind him and brushed the fringes hanging above Kazuya’s face.
“I want to do this alone, you are safe here,” Jin noted to his mind, looking at his sleeping figure before he flee. Don’t worry.. we’ll see each other again.
After Jin successfully sneaked, he caught his breath first and fished a folded paper on his pocket. Then a smile instantly carved on his lips as he saw the first on the list.
“Aizen Festival,” he breathes out gladly as he pictured out how loud and happy festival it would be. He was just a kid the last time he went there with his family and the experience was unforgettable and he wanted to feel it at least for the last time.
Jin was walking at some alley, imagining how he will spend his free time when suddenly he noticed a silhouette shadow behind him. He became alert of his surroundings. He gathered his strength to look behind him to know who it is.. but he found no one. He runs fast as he could, then hide somewhere.
“Where is that Bakanishi?” The mysterious man muttered to himself, catching his breath.
Jin suddenly showed himself behind the man’s back. He was about to hit him with a wooden stick in his hands until he noticed that familiar figure. He’s wearing a pair of hospital pajama, bare-footed.. and with a notebook in his hands.
“Kazuya???”
Kazuya looked behind him upon hearing someone called his name. He’s wearing this look like he’s a lost puppy. “Where are you going? Can I come with you?”
“No!! It’s not good for you! They will look for you for sure!”
“As if they won’t look for you either. Please Jin.. I want to go with you. It’s boring living in those four-walled rooms, help me to get rest in smelling those medicines everywhere… Please…” Kazuya used his well-known puppy-kicked look. And it won that game.
“Okay.. But stick with me.. Don’t get lost or I will have a hard time looking for my lost puppy.. Get that??!!” Jin tries to taunt him.
“Yatta!!! Jin you’re the best!!. Kazuya jumped at him, hugging him so suddenly. Both of them proceed on their way to the bus stop.
“I thought you were asleep already.” Jin said to break their silence. Being with Kazuya means like being with a five year old and so he’ll be a nanny Jin in their trip since he can’t bring back the younger inside. It’s too dangerous than sneaking out as he believed. And right now, his temples was like get drilled thinking what ifs, like what if Kazuya will get lost there? His vacation will be ruined for sure.
“I can’t. But I tried I swear! But on the second thought.. It’s a good thing because something is telling me that you are up to something and I’m right!! I have a super sense, isn’t it??!!” Kazuya joked around.
“You little turtle!!!” Jin smiled, ruffling his hair. There’s a sense of trust in Kazuya formed later on, he trusted the young man to be good. Yes, like a five year old GOOD boy.
Kazuya giggled to their little bickering moment. Not noticing that something is lacking in him.
Until FINALLY Jin noticed it. Kazuya is not wearing anything in his feet!
“I was in a hurry to follow you that’s why I forgot my slippers. But not Haru of course!!’’ Kazuya defend himself for being a baka.
“What will I gonna do to a child-like you following me around!! You’re giving me a headache!!”
“Well my answer to that is you have to endure that headache of yours for a longer time while I’m around!!”
Jin lowered himself, offering his back to Kame. Reclined in stun, Kazuya can’t utter any word. He could only move his arms that encircling Jin’s neck and his head that hiding his crimson cheeks. Jin placed Kazuya in a bench as they’ve reached the bus stop and he knelt down to wipe Kazuya’s feet with a towel.
“Ano, where are we going?” Kazuya suddenly asked.
“Osaka,”
“That’s eight hours by riding a bus…”
Jin straighten up his body “it’s nice to ride in a bus… besides we could see more sceneries,"
:*:*:*:*
The thin fringe of sunlight reflects to the clear glass window that creates several of colors, dancing in the eyes of everybody who sees. The man closes his eyes due to great amount of light that his eyes couldn’t obtain. He switched his gazed into another man leaning his head on his broad shoulders. He snuggled his nose on the surface of his blonde soft hair.
“Good morning,” he mumbled as he heard the other one moaned softly.
“Hmm…” he opened his eyes, strived to looked to the man who’s arms wrapped on his shoulders.
He rubbed his eyes for clearer sight “Who are you?”
The man grinned then slowly, he got the notebook he was handling.
赤西仁
After he wrote his name, he let the other one to read it “Akanishi Jin…”
“Now that you know my name.. I want you to trust me first okay.” The younger one nodded.
“Ano, where are we going?” Kazuya asked.
“Osaka. And we’re almost there,” Jin pointed out to the window.
“Osaka… I heard it many times from papa and mama,” Kazuya said while he started to write on Haru.
“What are you writing?”
“Uhm, about going to Osaka… wearing pajamas and without slippers?! That I’m with a guy named Akanishi Jin.”
“It’s okay… come on” Jin chuckled then grabbed Kazuya’s hand.
***********
PART 2