Y'know, it's worse when the day started off good, too.
Thank you to everyone who took the time to reply to my post yesterday. I really needed it. ♥
As to why ...
Yesterday, I was having a good morning. I managed to get up, fed, showered, dressed - with makeup even - and out of the house in just over an hour so I could catch the bus at 6:10. While waiting at my second bus stop, an older man who was picking up trash stopped to greet me and wish me a good day. I got to the laundromat I needed early, discovered that they opened at 7:00 which, seeing as I needed to be at work at 10:00 was a good thing. Talked to Brother on the phone while waiting for my clothes to dry, and discovered that laundry only takes about an hour at that place. So I was able to get to work by 8:45, which meant I hung out at Starbucks for a good hour with my notebook and a frappachino. When I told the lady at the counter who took my order that my name was Sunny, she said 'Well, that's appropriate', which made me grin. Got to work early, hung out listening to my MP3 player and just basking in the sun for about half an hour, 'cause Boss was late getting there for some reason. By the time I headed in for work, I was feeling relaxed and accomplished and happy.
About three hours later, Boss called me into the back to talk to me.
I'd heard him saying something on the phone earlier about how the business was barely breaking even, and it was hard sometimes, and he'd seemed kind of depressed all morning, which left me with a really bad feeling. Turns out I was right.
I lost my job.
The job that I loved, that I did every day with a smile on my face because I was genuinely happy to be there. Where I loved the people I worked with and the customers I helped. Where just being in the shop left me with a good feeling.
The price we pay for the seed we sell went up again - for the second time since I was hired. It's high enough that they can't afford to pay for a third person, and as he put it, being the newest hired I'm 'at the bottom of the totem pole'. Boss explained that normally he would just cut back my hours in that case, but I've only been working eight hours a week as it is, so there's really nothing to cut back. And he didn't think it was fair to keep asking me to come in for just a few hours at a time. He said that his original plan before this had been to hire me on permanently, and that he was going to get another part-timer to cover the extra hours in the summer, but now there's no way he can afford to. He looked so guilty and clearly felt so bad about it that I just kept smiling, and teasingly promised that I wouldn't cry on him. He ruefully said that he promised not to cry on *me* in return.
He told me to keep my work shirt as a 'souvenir' - namely because it's been abused by this point, and promised to pay me all nine hours that I'd been scheduled for this week even though I really only worked for three. He complimented me repeatedly, saying that I was honest and dependable, and had dramatically improved the quality of my work in the last month (namely because I was finally starting to get a better understanding of what I was supposed to be doing). He also offered to be a reference for me in the future, adding that he would have to say he wouldn't hire me back, but it was purely on the fact that he couldn't afford to. He made the offer before I even had the chance to ask to, which was sweet of him. So I kept smiling at him, shook his hand and thanked him for everything, and he thanked me in return.
I went into the bathroom to change my shirt, grabbed my stuff, and headed out the door. On my way I passed BossLady, who I'd just been chatting with before Boss had to talk to me. She smiled and asked if I was on my way out. Boss said he hadn't had a chance to talk about everything with her yet, so I think she thought I was being sent home early. I gave her a smile and offered my hand, telling her thank you for everything. Because really, they hired me off the street knowing about my knee injury and that it had been awhile since I'd worked last, and they'd always been so incredibly nice and helpful. She smiled back at me and shook my hand, but she looked a little confused: I'm not sure if it's because she was surprised that I said it, or because she didn't realize I was *leaving*, not just going home. Maybe both.
I walked out of the store, around the building and all the way down to the parking lot on the far end, and called Brother because I really needed someone to talk to. He got me calmed down enough to keep me from crying - although it was a near thing - and convinced me to go to the store and buy myself some flowers with money he'd sent me 'cause he thought I needed cheering up. He also demanded I buy myself a stash of chocolate. -Smiles-
So, I bought some groceries. I have a really pretty bouquet of flowers that were technically supposed to be for Mother's Day, but I don't care. It's mean, but I feel slightly amused by the poor flourist at the store who made the mistake of asking me how I was doing. (I told her 'Pretty horrible actually. I just lost my job.' And she looked absolutely horrified, with this total 'Oh, shit!' expression.) On the last bus ride home the driver complimented my flowers, and a really cute guy offered to help me with my stuff just as I finally finished getting settled. When he got off, he waggled his eyebrows at me in this really cute way, too. -Amused-
I came home. Told purplestripe66 the news. Made my post. And then I took a two and a half hour nap, 'cause I was still wavering on whether or not I was going to start crying.
I'm better now. Still heartbroken, because I really did love that job. And I *HATE* being unemployed again. >.< I'm gonna have to update my status with the people who do my free health insurance again. Also realized I'm gonna have to go back to work anyway 'cause I still have their apron, and I need to pick up my paystubs. I was gonna do it today, but I woke up feeling sore and achey all over; apparently my body isn't any happier than the rest of me.
But I'm managing. There are places around here that I'm planning to apply, and summer is one of the better hiring seasons in general. I may be a bit depressed for awhile, but I'm trying to keep thinking as positively as I can.
And hey, in the meantime I can go murder things in Sims: Medieval. ^.^V
As to why ...
Yesterday, I was having a good morning. I managed to get up, fed, showered, dressed - with makeup even - and out of the house in just over an hour so I could catch the bus at 6:10. While waiting at my second bus stop, an older man who was picking up trash stopped to greet me and wish me a good day. I got to the laundromat I needed early, discovered that they opened at 7:00 which, seeing as I needed to be at work at 10:00 was a good thing. Talked to Brother on the phone while waiting for my clothes to dry, and discovered that laundry only takes about an hour at that place. So I was able to get to work by 8:45, which meant I hung out at Starbucks for a good hour with my notebook and a frappachino. When I told the lady at the counter who took my order that my name was Sunny, she said 'Well, that's appropriate', which made me grin. Got to work early, hung out listening to my MP3 player and just basking in the sun for about half an hour, 'cause Boss was late getting there for some reason. By the time I headed in for work, I was feeling relaxed and accomplished and happy.
About three hours later, Boss called me into the back to talk to me.
I'd heard him saying something on the phone earlier about how the business was barely breaking even, and it was hard sometimes, and he'd seemed kind of depressed all morning, which left me with a really bad feeling. Turns out I was right.
I lost my job.
The job that I loved, that I did every day with a smile on my face because I was genuinely happy to be there. Where I loved the people I worked with and the customers I helped. Where just being in the shop left me with a good feeling.
The price we pay for the seed we sell went up again - for the second time since I was hired. It's high enough that they can't afford to pay for a third person, and as he put it, being the newest hired I'm 'at the bottom of the totem pole'. Boss explained that normally he would just cut back my hours in that case, but I've only been working eight hours a week as it is, so there's really nothing to cut back. And he didn't think it was fair to keep asking me to come in for just a few hours at a time. He said that his original plan before this had been to hire me on permanently, and that he was going to get another part-timer to cover the extra hours in the summer, but now there's no way he can afford to. He looked so guilty and clearly felt so bad about it that I just kept smiling, and teasingly promised that I wouldn't cry on him. He ruefully said that he promised not to cry on *me* in return.
He told me to keep my work shirt as a 'souvenir' - namely because it's been abused by this point, and promised to pay me all nine hours that I'd been scheduled for this week even though I really only worked for three. He complimented me repeatedly, saying that I was honest and dependable, and had dramatically improved the quality of my work in the last month (namely because I was finally starting to get a better understanding of what I was supposed to be doing). He also offered to be a reference for me in the future, adding that he would have to say he wouldn't hire me back, but it was purely on the fact that he couldn't afford to. He made the offer before I even had the chance to ask to, which was sweet of him. So I kept smiling at him, shook his hand and thanked him for everything, and he thanked me in return.
I went into the bathroom to change my shirt, grabbed my stuff, and headed out the door. On my way I passed BossLady, who I'd just been chatting with before Boss had to talk to me. She smiled and asked if I was on my way out. Boss said he hadn't had a chance to talk about everything with her yet, so I think she thought I was being sent home early. I gave her a smile and offered my hand, telling her thank you for everything. Because really, they hired me off the street knowing about my knee injury and that it had been awhile since I'd worked last, and they'd always been so incredibly nice and helpful. She smiled back at me and shook my hand, but she looked a little confused: I'm not sure if it's because she was surprised that I said it, or because she didn't realize I was *leaving*, not just going home. Maybe both.
I walked out of the store, around the building and all the way down to the parking lot on the far end, and called Brother because I really needed someone to talk to. He got me calmed down enough to keep me from crying - although it was a near thing - and convinced me to go to the store and buy myself some flowers with money he'd sent me 'cause he thought I needed cheering up. He also demanded I buy myself a stash of chocolate. -Smiles-
So, I bought some groceries. I have a really pretty bouquet of flowers that were technically supposed to be for Mother's Day, but I don't care. It's mean, but I feel slightly amused by the poor flourist at the store who made the mistake of asking me how I was doing. (I told her 'Pretty horrible actually. I just lost my job.' And she looked absolutely horrified, with this total 'Oh, shit!' expression.) On the last bus ride home the driver complimented my flowers, and a really cute guy offered to help me with my stuff just as I finally finished getting settled. When he got off, he waggled his eyebrows at me in this really cute way, too. -Amused-
I came home. Told purplestripe66 the news. Made my post. And then I took a two and a half hour nap, 'cause I was still wavering on whether or not I was going to start crying.
I'm better now. Still heartbroken, because I really did love that job. And I *HATE* being unemployed again. >.< I'm gonna have to update my status with the people who do my free health insurance again. Also realized I'm gonna have to go back to work anyway 'cause I still have their apron, and I need to pick up my paystubs. I was gonna do it today, but I woke up feeling sore and achey all over; apparently my body isn't any happier than the rest of me.
But I'm managing. There are places around here that I'm planning to apply, and summer is one of the better hiring seasons in general. I may be a bit depressed for awhile, but I'm trying to keep thinking as positively as I can.
And hey, in the meantime I can go murder things in Sims: Medieval. ^.^V