I've Seen This Before....
here is this "wonderful" article running around that is called "What Happened To All the Nice Guys?" If you Google it, you will most likely find it pretty fast. Its nothing special. It does however bring up a few points, and still neatly avoids the real answer to the question. First thing it brings up:
The Quiet Nice Guy
This is the one the little story talks about at the beginning. It's kind of classifying him as kind of nerdy, pathetic, and clingy. Great. That's just what the world needs, more stereotypes. I won't even go into the reasons this whole type-casting is a load of total crap. It's pretty obvious to me, that if the world needed another "Revenge of the Nerds" movie, we would make one. Notice we haven't.
Lack of Self Respect
This is where the whole story falls apart. If someone has such poor self respect that they have to turn to being a jerk just to try and get a girl, they really aren't a nice guy. They are just neutral, falling into the darkness. Nice guys don't stop being nice. In fact, nice guys are like nice girls, and end up with the same problems. You know those horror stories of nice girls who have abusive spouses? The poor ladies who are controlled and abused by these jerks? Well, there are men in the same position as those ladies. Oh yes, its true! Women can be as much jerks as men can! Women can be controlling and abusive too! The difference is, because men are SUPPOSED to be the strong ones, society as a whole makes fun of any man who has this happen to them. We ridicule them for being weak, and small. They are "cast out" of the "Men's Club" because they aren't macho. So, what happens to the others who have this happen to them? They become silent. Their bear their shame and pain quietly and keep going on.
But like many women, some of these guys are able to break free. Either with the help of friends, or just finding the courage in themselves, men and women alike find themselves free of bad relationships. And where do they go from there? Well, this is where the nice guys diverge. And this divergence is the same for all nice guys, be it ones who were never in a bad relationship, or ones just out of a bad one.
Some fall back into the same pattern. They get into a bad relationship, and start that cycle over.
Some find a nice woman. They have a nice start to a relationship and it goes many different ways from there.
Some lose their niceness and become the crude, rude and mean kind of people who tend to dominate the world. Or at least your attention.
Some become what molded them. Like an abused child who beats their kids, they perpetuate the cycle of violence and cruelty.
Some end up going out and looking again, hoping and praying.
Some become bitter and jaded, and just give up. They see the world, and the people in it, and the first thing they wonder is: Is the human race worth saving?
Guess which category I am in.
Another topic that seems to come along with this story (at least when I found one website that had it) is the concept of:
Feminism vs. Feminazism
Yeah, yeah, I am about to invoke the rule by using the N word. Not that one, the swaztika wearing one. But there is a reason. Feminist, the pure ones, believe in equality. And know what? A lotta guys do too. However, the others go too far. I was amused, once in High school the English teacher asked "How many of you believe in equality between the sexes?" and everyone raised their hand. Then he asked "How many believe that the feminist movement has gone too far?" Most of the women raised their hands, and the men were too scared to. THAT says something. When women think it has gone too far, that tells me something is wrong. Equality is the best thing for everyone. When you start using the cry of equality to push others down, you may as well call yourself "Big Sister". For those that don't get the reference, in the novel 1984, to make sure everyone was equal, you were "handicapped" to make yourself as capable as the least capable person. Nice thought, isn't it? After all, why should that guy have 20/20 vision if I can't have it?
So in the end, what is my point? My point is simple. Everyone has an agenda. The guy who wrote the original story wants women to believe he is a "nice guy" and instead of taking blame for his decision to become a jerk, he wants to blame women. That doesn't sound like something a nice guy would do. And what is my agenda? To entertain you and educate you. How will it serve me? Probably won't, but at this point, I don't care if it does. I may be bitter and jaded, not the type someone would want to date, but I'm still nice enough to tell you there are snakes out there, some vile cobras who are dancing in front of you making you think they are not going to bite you.
And what do I think of human beings on a whole?
I am hoping we are worth saving, but fear we are spiraling down the toilet faster every day.
The Quiet Nice Guy
This is the one the little story talks about at the beginning. It's kind of classifying him as kind of nerdy, pathetic, and clingy. Great. That's just what the world needs, more stereotypes. I won't even go into the reasons this whole type-casting is a load of total crap. It's pretty obvious to me, that if the world needed another "Revenge of the Nerds" movie, we would make one. Notice we haven't.
Lack of Self Respect
This is where the whole story falls apart. If someone has such poor self respect that they have to turn to being a jerk just to try and get a girl, they really aren't a nice guy. They are just neutral, falling into the darkness. Nice guys don't stop being nice. In fact, nice guys are like nice girls, and end up with the same problems. You know those horror stories of nice girls who have abusive spouses? The poor ladies who are controlled and abused by these jerks? Well, there are men in the same position as those ladies. Oh yes, its true! Women can be as much jerks as men can! Women can be controlling and abusive too! The difference is, because men are SUPPOSED to be the strong ones, society as a whole makes fun of any man who has this happen to them. We ridicule them for being weak, and small. They are "cast out" of the "Men's Club" because they aren't macho. So, what happens to the others who have this happen to them? They become silent. Their bear their shame and pain quietly and keep going on.
But like many women, some of these guys are able to break free. Either with the help of friends, or just finding the courage in themselves, men and women alike find themselves free of bad relationships. And where do they go from there? Well, this is where the nice guys diverge. And this divergence is the same for all nice guys, be it ones who were never in a bad relationship, or ones just out of a bad one.
Some fall back into the same pattern. They get into a bad relationship, and start that cycle over.
Some find a nice woman. They have a nice start to a relationship and it goes many different ways from there.
Some lose their niceness and become the crude, rude and mean kind of people who tend to dominate the world. Or at least your attention.
Some become what molded them. Like an abused child who beats their kids, they perpetuate the cycle of violence and cruelty.
Some end up going out and looking again, hoping and praying.
Some become bitter and jaded, and just give up. They see the world, and the people in it, and the first thing they wonder is: Is the human race worth saving?
Guess which category I am in.
Another topic that seems to come along with this story (at least when I found one website that had it) is the concept of:
Feminism vs. Feminazism
Yeah, yeah, I am about to invoke the rule by using the N word. Not that one, the swaztika wearing one. But there is a reason. Feminist, the pure ones, believe in equality. And know what? A lotta guys do too. However, the others go too far. I was amused, once in High school the English teacher asked "How many of you believe in equality between the sexes?" and everyone raised their hand. Then he asked "How many believe that the feminist movement has gone too far?" Most of the women raised their hands, and the men were too scared to. THAT says something. When women think it has gone too far, that tells me something is wrong. Equality is the best thing for everyone. When you start using the cry of equality to push others down, you may as well call yourself "Big Sister". For those that don't get the reference, in the novel 1984, to make sure everyone was equal, you were "handicapped" to make yourself as capable as the least capable person. Nice thought, isn't it? After all, why should that guy have 20/20 vision if I can't have it?
So in the end, what is my point? My point is simple. Everyone has an agenda. The guy who wrote the original story wants women to believe he is a "nice guy" and instead of taking blame for his decision to become a jerk, he wants to blame women. That doesn't sound like something a nice guy would do. And what is my agenda? To entertain you and educate you. How will it serve me? Probably won't, but at this point, I don't care if it does. I may be bitter and jaded, not the type someone would want to date, but I'm still nice enough to tell you there are snakes out there, some vile cobras who are dancing in front of you making you think they are not going to bite you.
And what do I think of human beings on a whole?
I am hoping we are worth saving, but fear we are spiraling down the toilet faster every day.