“We have the wolf by the ears; we can neither hold him, nor let him go." For auror_aura

Sep 29, 2009 18:17

Wolfsbane potion imbibed by a wizard now flowed through the veins of a wolf, calming him, keeping his more dangerous predilections at bay.  Sometimes the draught was enough to cool his blood and allow him to curl up before the fire and sleep, but not tonight.  Tonight he prowled the room he could not leave, thanks to charms he could not undo in ( Read more... )

timeline: order of the pheonix, role play, featuring: nymphadora tonks

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true_marauder October 1 2009, 20:29:05 UTC
"I know you can provide for yourself; Moody, in his own sort of way, has said that you're brilliant at your job." He didn't know how to explain to her what it felt like knowing that the slim chances he'd had for work were gone, the frustration that the longest he'd held down a job in his life had been the year at Hogwarts, and only then had it been possible because of Dumbledore. She could take care of herself, but he couldn't say the same thing.

He closed his eyes briefly when she flushed, when he recognized the look in her eyes. His jaw tensed.

"I need you to know, to really understand..." He opened his eyes and cupped one hand against the side of her face, making sure she couldn't look away. "If you believe nothing else I've said today you have to understand that you can't trust the wolf. You can't be anywhere near me when I'm like that."

He took a deep breath, remembering just what the wolf had wanted to do to her. "The wolf wouldn't have attacked you this time, but that doesn't mean anything. Next time he - I - could be out for blood, and even this morning... I wouldn't have cared about your comfort, or readiness, or safely. I would have used you."

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auror_aura October 1 2009, 20:40:01 UTC
She nodded. "I understand. I promise, I won't show up so early again. That was my fault, and you don't have to worry about it happening again." She kissed the corner of his mouth gently. "You didn't know what you were doing. You weren't you, because you would never use me."

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true_marauder October 1 2009, 21:01:08 UTC
"I wasn't wrong when I said I shouldn't have let Sirius convince me that it was safe to transform here. I will go someplace else on the night of a full moon."

His other hand cupped her other cheek, so that he held her captured. He kissed her back, understanding that as much as it scared him he couldn't let her go, even if she let him. "I'm afraid I'll use you up just by letting you stay."

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auror_aura October 1 2009, 21:16:56 UTC
"Remus, sweetheart, I'm not a... a glass of water you can drain dry," Tonks said consolingly. "I'm a person, and I make my own decisions, and you should trust me to make the right decisions for me. We're adults, and we'll work through whatever problems pop up."

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true_marauder October 1 2009, 21:49:55 UTC
He thought of his parents who had aged decades in the ten years between his being bitten and their deaths. Sirius, who was in many ways only the shell of who he had been. Peter, on his hands and knees begging, already a ghost, his soul dead. The werewolf pack he would be joining soon, more animal then human. There were a million ways to be used up, but she was young and alive and couldn't see it yet.

"I do trust you, completely. But I love you, and that means wanting to protect you, and wanting what's best for you."

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auror_aura October 1 2009, 22:07:46 UTC
"I understand," she murmured, tracing his features carefully, even though she knew them by heart now. "I love you, too, and it's not about how much gold you have or your condition or how old you are. It's about how you make me feel, and no one who makes me feel this good could possibly be bad."

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true_marauder October 1 2009, 22:24:10 UTC
He couldn't agree with her but he wouldn't disagree, not for now. He couldn't help feeling that this was only a reprieve, though. There was a clock somewhere counting down the time they had until he would have to leave, and it was only going to get harder with each day they spent together.

Finally he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her tight against his chest, tucking her head beneath his chin. "All I want is for you to be happy and safe."

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auror_aura October 1 2009, 22:28:36 UTC
"I try to stay as safe as I can. And you make me very happy, Remus. No matter what, I want you to know how happy you make me." Being in his arms was like coming home.

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true_marauder October 1 2009, 23:01:11 UTC
"I've never felt like this before," he admitted softly. "Like I can't breath unless you're near."

He stroked her hair softly. "I'm sure to handle it badly, but it will never be because I don't love you."

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auror_aura October 1 2009, 23:26:49 UTC
"Neither have I," she replied. "And no one's ever said things like that to me, either... I feel special and important when I'm with you."

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