i couldnt sleep. so i began to write

Dec 07, 2004 04:39

if i could write everything racing through my brain, it would be amazing ( Read more... )

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you are one of my best friends, i want you to know this. tripletrouble December 7 2004, 20:59:12 UTC
i dont understand why people act the way they do.reading about people treating you like garbage really made me sad. cuz if people just got the chance to know you, they'd know that you are infectiously amazing.sweet.funny.smart. and you have a great personality thats redic'! o("-")o i really wish we somehow woulda met sooner. cuz what we have as a friendship is amazing and i talk to you more than i do with my acutal friends taht i can see everyday. but take taht as a compliment.please.

you seem to be here for me, more than anyone else right now. you've offered for me to call you and you'd listen to me. i want you to know, that means a lot! but there a few people here in pa that do care about me. but i dunno. i dont feel it i guess. theres so much going on right now. overwelming if you will?....and i guess i stress out over it and dont care about myself as much. i dunno. i need to get my priorities strait.

as for sleep, my older sister called me today. the first words outta her mouth were: "why are you not going to bed at night?"....i didnt even have to say anything, she just knew. strange. i was like: "how did you know?"....and she just knew. yeh anyways, she brought me to tears. not in a bad way, but in a way that i need to be honest with myself. she asked me several times: "what time did i go to bed last night?"....i couldnt give her a strait answer like: "oh i went to bed at 5:17"..cuz tahts what time i saw before i fell asleep. so i said: "after 2ish"....then she said. "well you need to start going to bed ontime, because this is hurting you. and its a serious health issue." and i know shes right and you are right, when you say, i need my sleep. but this is a habit ive had since atleast 7th grade. its this viscious cycle that keeps repeating itself over and over. anyways. and its hard to correct. so seriously. if i dont get on a good sleeping track by this weekend, im going to the doctors for real this time and getting medication.

hmmm. anyways. i cant tahnk you enough for all your comments. when i came home and read this, it made me feel happy inside, and its been hard for me to feel happy about anything. but again. THANKYOU! its nice knowing someone out there cares. liek you know?. chyeah. steven is very lucky to be with you. and im so glad i know him, and i met you through him. cuz i dont know what i'd do with myself. we need to hang out. i need to be more outgoing and like take a train to maryland. and see what its like down there. you could show me all ur hang outs. as we 'hangout' hehehe. but until then, i hope i see ya soon. maybe over the holidays.

kfc/tacobell='s a plan. yummy in our tummys.

well. i will talk to ya soon! ♥ily.♥

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Re: you are one of my best friends, i want you to know this. exhumedrhetoric December 8 2004, 10:51:35 UTC
haha yes i getcha doll<3 seriosly though i am here for you. because i know what it's like to have NO ONE. and if you ever get sad or anything just know that i do care about you. you're freakin SUPERB and anyone that treats you any less than that is an absolute dumbass. furreal. you gotta come down and hang out. (we have a kfc/taco bell right down the street from my house!!!!!) hah, and winter break would be good. if you can.. i'm going up to pa hopefully around new years, so you would only need a one way ticket if you were to go by train. i could pick you up at the station and bring you back home when i go up there..... if you want ^_^ gahhh lemme know!!!!<3333

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luff luff luff the idea! : D tripletrouble December 8 2004, 12:53:06 UTC
oh my god. i wonder how i could ask if i could go to maryland. see i never ever ever have went outta state by myself. w/out a relative or going to a relatives. that would be so awesome. i dont know what i'd do with myself. like being on my own. hanging out with you. im kinda freaking out right now, juss thinking about it.

im gonna talk to my sister about it. see if it will fly over with my crazy grandma!

thanx mel♥

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