A post of lists
I am sick and have a lot to do. It's surprising how much I have gotten accomplished while hacking and spitting and generally being exhausted but it is not surprising that I still have a lot more to do.
So far I've: purchased all the craft supplies I need for all of the projects in the living room, put together all of the projects for the living room, tag saled to buy all the furniture we need for less than $20 including a craft cabinet (large!), dresser, and coffee table (orange!), finished a friend's soap holder, painted half of the dresser (there are two colors to it), and repaired a hole in Rebecca's room.
I have to: Make last finishing touches on my resume to send to PUSH, write a cover letter, pack all of my stuff/go through and give stuff to goodwill, sand and paint the craft cabinet black, prime the rest of the dresser and paint it black/put cork board on it and paint it black. Also, I have to pack everything else that's in the house, then go through and clean the entire house.
Yesterday I found out my favorite book is written by a famous author who has written many other wonderful books as well as screenplays that have been made into films! I had no idea. The wonderful things one learns when one's friends are brilliant. How brilliant I may become just by asking them question after question and listening to the complete and complex responses. Yesterday I learned about Tillianism a little bit but was too exhausted to think and ask questions. I love having friends who I can ask more and more questions of and who will just as easily respond with, "I don't know," as they will give an answer. Honesty. It's something I have come to appreciate more and more in life. I never knew how much I loved it until it went away.
Other things I've learned recently:
I am much more emotional than even I once thought. Someone hurt me and embarrassed me but I am drawn to people more than I am drawn to self preservation, (although there are both elements in the way I am now treating this person). I had never put the two at odds with each other until now when I have been treated wrongly and have been legitimately angry then have legitimately forgiven. I am getting more from this relationship than I would without it. I need support, comfort, understanding, and I can be honest with this person the way he is always honest with me. It is true to say I love him, and it is true to say I will miss him deeply once I have gone and we no longer see each other frequently. But it will also be a relief. A relief because I need to move on and find someone who can actually treat me how I expect to be treated, who lives close enough that we can actually spend time together. But he appreciates me-loves all of the things that I have shown him about me, and listens with understanding when I am upset or am complaining. He likes to just sit and do nothing, or to go for long walks. He is agreeable and simple. He is passionate about few things, but talented at many. He is intelligent and knowledgable and interesting. And I will miss that. I will miss listening to him tell me about his successes during childhood school days, and I will miss the story of him quitting school. I will miss wondering about his achievement-why he refuses to try at anything any more, when he has so much talent. A complete lack of hope? Not enough support?
He is so good. And he is so sad. He is so beautiful.
So far I've: purchased all the craft supplies I need for all of the projects in the living room, put together all of the projects for the living room, tag saled to buy all the furniture we need for less than $20 including a craft cabinet (large!), dresser, and coffee table (orange!), finished a friend's soap holder, painted half of the dresser (there are two colors to it), and repaired a hole in Rebecca's room.
I have to: Make last finishing touches on my resume to send to PUSH, write a cover letter, pack all of my stuff/go through and give stuff to goodwill, sand and paint the craft cabinet black, prime the rest of the dresser and paint it black/put cork board on it and paint it black. Also, I have to pack everything else that's in the house, then go through and clean the entire house.
Yesterday I found out my favorite book is written by a famous author who has written many other wonderful books as well as screenplays that have been made into films! I had no idea. The wonderful things one learns when one's friends are brilliant. How brilliant I may become just by asking them question after question and listening to the complete and complex responses. Yesterday I learned about Tillianism a little bit but was too exhausted to think and ask questions. I love having friends who I can ask more and more questions of and who will just as easily respond with, "I don't know," as they will give an answer. Honesty. It's something I have come to appreciate more and more in life. I never knew how much I loved it until it went away.
Other things I've learned recently:
I am much more emotional than even I once thought. Someone hurt me and embarrassed me but I am drawn to people more than I am drawn to self preservation, (although there are both elements in the way I am now treating this person). I had never put the two at odds with each other until now when I have been treated wrongly and have been legitimately angry then have legitimately forgiven. I am getting more from this relationship than I would without it. I need support, comfort, understanding, and I can be honest with this person the way he is always honest with me. It is true to say I love him, and it is true to say I will miss him deeply once I have gone and we no longer see each other frequently. But it will also be a relief. A relief because I need to move on and find someone who can actually treat me how I expect to be treated, who lives close enough that we can actually spend time together. But he appreciates me-loves all of the things that I have shown him about me, and listens with understanding when I am upset or am complaining. He likes to just sit and do nothing, or to go for long walks. He is agreeable and simple. He is passionate about few things, but talented at many. He is intelligent and knowledgable and interesting. And I will miss that. I will miss listening to him tell me about his successes during childhood school days, and I will miss the story of him quitting school. I will miss wondering about his achievement-why he refuses to try at anything any more, when he has so much talent. A complete lack of hope? Not enough support?
He is so good. And he is so sad. He is so beautiful.