Much needed rambling...feel free to ingnore
Okay, so I haven't posted in six months. Sorry. So much has happened. I have been trying to read a little bit of my "Friends" posts over the last couple of weeks. It seems there is so much to catch up on, which I know can't happen 100%, but I am thankful to have this ability so that I don't seem so out of touch with everyone.
I guess I felt like posting today, because I'm nervous and anxious, and think that if I can talk about things and just get them out of my head then maybe I'll more at peace.
The last six months have been crazy health-wise. I started giving myself Humira injections biweekly, then weekly, for my rheumatoid arthritis, inflammatory joint disease, and seronegative spondyloarthropathy. Humira is a tricky drug, though. No injections if taking antibiotic (which I take frequently due to various infections); no injections if having a procedure (derm biopsy; bilateral myringotomy tubes; upcoming surgery); no injection is sick in any way, shape or form (had various bladder infections, UTIs, ear infections, sinus infections, colds, etc, etc….)! So not easy. But this was the easy part.
Whether it is due to either of the previous medications (2 of the 16) that I am currently taking), or whether the onset of symptoms was purely coincidental has yet to be determined, but I haven’t driven since September because of severe neurological deficits and related problems. Chronic severe headaches with accompanying dizziness (medications for both); high blood pressure controlled only by medication (two times per day); loss of time; loss of words; poor spatial orientation; infrequent (but still happens) lack of filtering device between what I’m thinking and what I say and saying things I would never ever think or want to say; numbness of extremities and lips; neuropathies; and the list goes on, but why bother.
Because of the above (and whatever else) I’ve almost caused a number of car accidents at different intersections and traffic lights, flooded our Viking cook top, and had a small grease fire on the cook top, which looked very pretty as I stared at it, but damned if I could remember what to do with a ‘what was that? Oh yeah, fire…’.
Oh yeah, brain MRI showed a couple of small spots, indicative of a demyelinating condition. Saw a leading MS specialist to said, no MS. May be too early to tell. Another MRI in a year. Can’t tell you what else it might be, though, because I’m only here to tell you if you have MS or not! UGH!
So, my poor husband is going insane, as are our daughters!
Anyway, all of the above, not the main problem. My "previous" GYN had me on a six month therapy cycle of Lupron.
Instant MENOPAUSE!!!!!!!!!!!! UUUUGGGGGHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!! And all the wonderful symptoms and health related problems that can accompany it! Because, really, why not?
I was scheduled to have a total hysterectomy, the ‘old-fashioned’ way (let’s open her right up and inflict as much pain as I possibly can)! HE was a bit of a misogynist. Surgery was supposed to have been the week before Christmas. Instead, went to another doctor (infertility specialist/surgeon) for a second opinion. She had us at “I see no problem with starting out laparoscopically and seeing if we proceed with the surgery from there. Unless there’s evidence that indicates I should do else, I think we’ll just take the uterus and a bit of both fallopian tubes.” YAY for experts and compassionate doctors. What was going to be a five day stay in the hospital, has now gone to a 1-2 day if everything goes as planned. Of course, nothing ever goes as planned with me and all of my other medical conditions prevent me from ever having a speedy or normal recovery.
So, tomorrow I go to Thomas Jefferson Hospital for a hysterectomy and possible oophorectomy. All because of a painful and seldom heard of condition called adenomyosis. Of course I have to go an hour early, because I have a bleeding disorder (von Willebrand’s Disease which is a type of hemophilia) which requires an infusion of a clotting agent (DDAVP for short) before any procedure.
So, today I prepare for tomorrow. Tomorrow I put my life in the hands of an anesthesiologist, a hematologist, and a two surgeons. I know, I know…others have been through this and made it through just fine. It still doesn’t make it any easier mentally or emotionally for me today.
Today I’ll try to be strong. Tomorrow I’ll put on my game face and try to be even stronger than today. The day after, well I’m sure there will be pain, lots of pain, so I’ll deal with that. After that I’ll spend some time recovering. I need to be healthy for younger daughter’s 16th birthday and hubby’s upcoming birthday, as well as needing to spend lots of time going from medical test to medical test and specialist to specialist for both daughters, as we are living with their medical issues (thanks mom) and slowly but surely uncovering conditions and diseases that they’ll have to live with and deal with for the rest of their lives. Again, I’m sure they’re saying “Thanks Mom” over and over.
Bye for now.
I guess I felt like posting today, because I'm nervous and anxious, and think that if I can talk about things and just get them out of my head then maybe I'll more at peace.
The last six months have been crazy health-wise. I started giving myself Humira injections biweekly, then weekly, for my rheumatoid arthritis, inflammatory joint disease, and seronegative spondyloarthropathy. Humira is a tricky drug, though. No injections if taking antibiotic (which I take frequently due to various infections); no injections if having a procedure (derm biopsy; bilateral myringotomy tubes; upcoming surgery); no injection is sick in any way, shape or form (had various bladder infections, UTIs, ear infections, sinus infections, colds, etc, etc….)! So not easy. But this was the easy part.
Whether it is due to either of the previous medications (2 of the 16) that I am currently taking), or whether the onset of symptoms was purely coincidental has yet to be determined, but I haven’t driven since September because of severe neurological deficits and related problems. Chronic severe headaches with accompanying dizziness (medications for both); high blood pressure controlled only by medication (two times per day); loss of time; loss of words; poor spatial orientation; infrequent (but still happens) lack of filtering device between what I’m thinking and what I say and saying things I would never ever think or want to say; numbness of extremities and lips; neuropathies; and the list goes on, but why bother.
Because of the above (and whatever else) I’ve almost caused a number of car accidents at different intersections and traffic lights, flooded our Viking cook top, and had a small grease fire on the cook top, which looked very pretty as I stared at it, but damned if I could remember what to do with a ‘what was that? Oh yeah, fire…’.
Oh yeah, brain MRI showed a couple of small spots, indicative of a demyelinating condition. Saw a leading MS specialist to said, no MS. May be too early to tell. Another MRI in a year. Can’t tell you what else it might be, though, because I’m only here to tell you if you have MS or not! UGH!
So, my poor husband is going insane, as are our daughters!
Anyway, all of the above, not the main problem. My "previous" GYN had me on a six month therapy cycle of Lupron.
Instant MENOPAUSE!!!!!!!!!!!! UUUUGGGGGHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!! And all the wonderful symptoms and health related problems that can accompany it! Because, really, why not?
I was scheduled to have a total hysterectomy, the ‘old-fashioned’ way (let’s open her right up and inflict as much pain as I possibly can)! HE was a bit of a misogynist. Surgery was supposed to have been the week before Christmas. Instead, went to another doctor (infertility specialist/surgeon) for a second opinion. She had us at “I see no problem with starting out laparoscopically and seeing if we proceed with the surgery from there. Unless there’s evidence that indicates I should do else, I think we’ll just take the uterus and a bit of both fallopian tubes.” YAY for experts and compassionate doctors. What was going to be a five day stay in the hospital, has now gone to a 1-2 day if everything goes as planned. Of course, nothing ever goes as planned with me and all of my other medical conditions prevent me from ever having a speedy or normal recovery.
So, tomorrow I go to Thomas Jefferson Hospital for a hysterectomy and possible oophorectomy. All because of a painful and seldom heard of condition called adenomyosis. Of course I have to go an hour early, because I have a bleeding disorder (von Willebrand’s Disease which is a type of hemophilia) which requires an infusion of a clotting agent (DDAVP for short) before any procedure.
So, today I prepare for tomorrow. Tomorrow I put my life in the hands of an anesthesiologist, a hematologist, and a two surgeons. I know, I know…others have been through this and made it through just fine. It still doesn’t make it any easier mentally or emotionally for me today.
Today I’ll try to be strong. Tomorrow I’ll put on my game face and try to be even stronger than today. The day after, well I’m sure there will be pain, lots of pain, so I’ll deal with that. After that I’ll spend some time recovering. I need to be healthy for younger daughter’s 16th birthday and hubby’s upcoming birthday, as well as needing to spend lots of time going from medical test to medical test and specialist to specialist for both daughters, as we are living with their medical issues (thanks mom) and slowly but surely uncovering conditions and diseases that they’ll have to live with and deal with for the rest of their lives. Again, I’m sure they’re saying “Thanks Mom” over and over.
Bye for now.