Title: Lucky Number Thirteen
Fandom: Super Junior
Pairing: Lots... Hankyung/Heechul, Yesung/Ryeowook, Kyuhyun/Sungmin, Kangin/Eeteuk, Kibum/Donghae
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 3723
Summary: It’s the last job, and nothing can go wrong.
Notes: AU. Because I can. There is a lot of swearing, and mentions of sex. Oh yeah. I was watching a movie. Guess which one. It’s also kind of long.
The maid, she’s a short, thin, fragile old thing, couldn’t be easier to miss had she been invisible. Unfortunately, this is why she has been chosen and paid off; she plans to retire the moment she steps out of the room. Her cart, standard supply cart in a hotel such as this, was actually stocked up on all the latest technology, laptops, flat screen monitors, and smaller gadgets that had been found a purpose.
She knocks on the door, a subtle pattern that she has been taught several times, and it is answered by a tall, unfairly beautiful woman, who grins, and allows her in. Once the door is closed behind her, the woman takes the wig off of her head and drops it onto the bar; suddenly, she’s a man. There is another man waiting for the maid in the back of the suite, and his features are a pleasant mixture of feminine and masculine, but when he stands, his face breaks into a smile, and he holds out an envelope to her.
Once the cart has been unloaded, the maid takes it with her and goes to resign. She knows what is about to happen. It’s the last thing she cares about; she’s going to Brazil.
---
“I just don’t see why I have to wear the fucking dress.” There are men staring, and the tall man at Heechul’s side is getting many envious looks from the patrons. “I mean, Sungmin is the most innocent looking, and he’s in the strip club, practically running the place.”
It has been a long road of thieving, and Hankyung is just glad that it is almost over, because there have been a lot of close calls that none of them want to talk about. Heechul is just bitching because after this last job, he won’t have an excuse to wear dresses any more. Hankyung tells ‘her’ as much.
“You know what; I’m going to the strip club. That little bastard… just because he’s fucking…” Hankyung is glad that Heechul has the good sense to keep his voice quiet, because he does not sound remotely ladylike when he is swearing.
“Just calm down, and let’s get to the slots, darling?” The look he gets for the tacky pet name does not bode well for his sex life.
---
The hotel suite has been transformed into their temporary base. There is a man lounging on the sofa, staring at the flickering monitors, and another at the bar, wondering what he should drink next.
“Anything interesting?” the man at the bar has settled on a bottle of expensive vodka, and the man on the sofa hasn’t looked up. Youngwoon knows this is because he is bored senseless.
“Hankyung is lamenting his sex life.” Kyuhyun motions for him to bring him a glass, and as Youngwoon pours it, he fights down a laugh, because that’s nothing new. “Jungsu is flirting with some girl at the blackjack tables.” He takes the glass and downs it faster than Youngwoon thinks is healthy. It doesn’t seem to have any effect.
“Jungsu doesn’t know how to flirt.” But the screen is proving him a liar, because that is Jungsu surrounded by women, looking hotter than anything Youngwoon has ever seen. “Fuck. Why doesn’t he do that all the time?”
“If he did, we wouldn’t be as productive.” Kyuhyun is sliding into his coat, probably trying to slip out, and leave Youngwoon to watch the cameras. “I’m going to the strip club.”
“No. I am.” Youngwoon relishes the ‘Fuck you, asshole.’ that follows him out the door.
---
Jongwoon wishes his job allowed him to be inside the hotel all the time, but no, he is below it, freezing his ass off, and trying to get the wiring just right.
“Kim Jongwoon, if you’re on this line, trying to convince me to have phone sex, it is not going to happen.” Oh, and he’s trying to convince Ryeowook to entertain him. “Did you connect the…”
“Yes. I did. Are you seriously not going to talk about anything other than the rewiring?” he pulls a few small red wires, connects them and runs a test on them for conductivity.
Ryeowook is seriously busy, because he is doing the same thing, on the opposite side of the building. “I’m going to get you kicked off the team. We’re making it so they can’t detect all the software Jungsu has downloading. Make sure you get the phone lines.” He is looking down at a computer screen, with a list of extra-illegal computer programs. And…
“Who downloaded Girls Gone Wild?”
“I’m going to bet Donghae.” Jongwoon wants to ask why, but knows that Ryeowook is less likely to explain that way. “Probably to annoy the hell out of Kibum when he gets back.”
---
The management system is simple. Several backgrounds checks, references, and family member’s testimonies later, Donghae works for the casino. He has been accepted by the female staff, as nothing more than a space case who tends to be adorable, and says all the right things.
“You’re needed at table nine.” He has the floor memorized, and is at table nine, helping some twenty something get rid of a man who seems to like being rough. When he takes a swing at Donghae it does not go over well. Security is there within seconds, probably called by Donghee, who is two tables away, and knows that Donghae can’t hit worth shit.
At the end of the shift, he makes his way back to the room, following the same convoluted path he does every night. On his days off, he takes over for Kyuhyun, though he also does it when he can’t sleep. Tonight is just one of those nights. Kyuhyun looks almost too relieved to be away from the monitors, and he’s at the door before Donghae has sat down.
“I’m going to the strip club.”
---
It doesn’t take a genius to find a strip club, hidden or not; Kyuhyun knows to follow the loud music and flashing lights. It is still dark, cast in blue light, but he spots Youngwoon easily enough, appraising the merchandise, but offering nothing. Kyuhyun isn’t sure why, since he can afford it.
Sungmin is also easy to spot, though this is because he is dressed to the nines; suit, tie, fedora, and an expensive pair of sunglasses that Kibum bought him for his last birthday. It would be a nice picture, if there wasn’t currently a woman in his lap, whispering something in his ear that prompts a leer so dirty, Kyuhyun isn’t sure he could imagine what was said.
“Hey, hey, good looking.” The woman has a voice like sin, perfect for the casino’s reputation, and she’s dressed in more than the table dancers. It’s probably to give her a classier feel. It doesn’t work on Kyuhyun, because he’s still thinking about that damn fedora as he leaves.
---
“Jealousy doesn’t suit you.” Heechul is wearing a printed tee and comfy pants, looking more at ease than he has for the last few days. He and Kyuhyun are both sitting in front of the monitors, though Kyuhyun is trying his best to keep his eyes off of monitor ten; it’s panning across the main room of the strip club.
“You wear it relatively well.” This is the right thing to say, because Heechul is staring at the screens as well, eyes narrowed, and the words make him look at Kyuhyun and smile beatifically. They don’t normally get along for long enough to sit on the same couch, but they have a common enemy, the strippers, and it has brought them together.
“I wish we could just go and…” Heechul makes a violent stabbing motion, though his pristine smile afterwards tells Kyuhyun he isn’t stupid enough to fuck up the job because Hankyung is being nice, and giving up twenties to the best looking stripper in the building.
Kyuhyun is pleased to note that it is the same woman he turned down.
---
Ten of them are gathered in the suite, and one of the monitors shows another man’s face, though he does not look pleased. They have been arguing, and it is painfully obvious, because Jungsu is mad, and that only ever happens when something has gone awry.
“Do I have to fucking spell this out for you?” Youngwoon is getting ready to intercept him, should he decide to leap across the coffee table on Donghae, who doesn’t look at all interested, and is instead focused on the monitor through which Kibum is watching. “We need these computers. If you go around breaking them, there will most likely be pieces left behind, which is bad. Do not push them off of the tables!”
He grabs Youngwoon, and drags him to one of the backrooms, while the rest of them look at Kibum.
“So, where are you?”
---
America was never really a good place for him to go, because there was a lot of his childhood there, and he never wanted to leave. In fact, just from buying all the technology, he’d gotten wistful, and ended up back in the neighborhood he remembered. It was exactly the same, and Donghae had chosen then to email him.
Everything is going according to plan. Got all the stuff. What are you doing?
He had responded with a succinct, Sitting in my neighborhood. No response had arrived, and he`d kind of figured the conversation was over. Unfortunately not.
“Hey.” It figured that they would send Kyuhyun to pick him up from the airport, since his job didn’t come till the end. It had been a tossup between him and Youngwoon, so he wasn’t at all surprised. “Come on. They’re trying to convince Donghae to apologize.”
“Fat chance.”
---
Jungsu was bad at gambling. He had a terrible poker face, and he nearly always lost, but for some reason, he always had women falling over themselves to kiss him good luck, or to blow on the dice. It’s the smile, Ryeowook had explained once, you flick your hair to the side, and smile like you’re going to take them to bed.
This time is no different; he has barely managed to keep himself from sinking under, and there is a barely legal looking woman beside him, begging him to let her do the honors. So he holds out his hand, all patience, and that smile, and she blows her breath across his palm, probably in hopes of making him horny. She looks disappointed when he turns back to the table and throws the dice across, landing him with snake eyes.
Even so, nameless-girl cheers, and tries to follow him to the bar, but he points her, kindly, in the direction of another man who is doing much better than himself. And off she skips, while he orders something heavily alcoholic, and watches the casino move.
---
It is his day off, and he is glad to be in the light, because damn it, he is sick to death of the club, and really needs some quality time with his pillow. The others don’t seem to realize this, but he can’t blame Kyuhyun, who is restless from sleeping alone, or Jungsu who is just plain restless; neither of them read minds, so they can’t know what is going on in Sungmin’s head.
Eventually, he gets sick of being watched from the doorway, and rolls to the other side of the bed. It doesn’t take long for Kyuhyun to get the message, and he crawls in beside Sungmin, careful not to steal all the blankets. And Kyuhyun means nothing by it, really, but his arm just kind of naturally drapes over Sungmin’s stomach.
“Nng.” he says, and rolls over. “Close the blinds, and lock the door.”
---
Hyukjae is late. He knows this, but he walks into the casino, all dressed up, and the owner is there to meet him. He, the scrawny, yet surprisingly strong, Hyukjae, is their way into the vaults. There is a case of jewels, all of them real, and he asks for a word with the manager in private.
Once it clicks in the manager’s head that he is a really important client, he gets a suite to himself. This means nothing at all, because it is just more space for equipment, sleeping and sex, which is why Hyukjae is leaving, and not coming back until well after dawn.
---
The casino is a nice one, and since Ryeowook hasn’t actually been inside of it yet, he makes a big deal about the suites. Unfortunately, they have been lived in and are being run by a tyrant, who is currently begging him to make something edible, because they don’t want the casino’s finest AAA steak if it’s going to be smothered in some sauce that tastes like total crap.
So he is in the kitchen, and Jongwoon has followed him in to sneak a taste of their supper early. He claims this is not the only reason he is there, but so far he’s been pretty useless.
“Sex?” he asks, making his purpose clear, pulling Ryeowook closer, and he’s sure no one notices that he overcooked the noodles a bit.
---
It is finally time and Youngwoon watches as Hyukjae puts up a fuss about his damn jewels, and the manager agrees to let him see. Posing as Hyukjae’s bodyguard is good, because in a black suit, and tinted sunglasses, nobody wants to pick a fight with him.
They are dragged through security checkpoints, and more security checkpoints, until the million dollar box is right in front of him, glittering and safe. This, Youngwoon thinks, is his favorite part, and he leans over to say, ‘Do it now’. It isn’t visible at all, because Hyukjae is a professional, and nobody is going to realize that one of the rubies has been switched with a tracking device.
---
Donghae has travelled up the managerial ladder fast, and he informs them that he will be doing a cash in three nights from then. Kyuhyun starts doing stretches, and Donghee starts to mess with the casinos security system. Sungmin begins to pick the most trustworthy of the strippers; they need to get the money out somehow.
---
They are going over blue prints, and everyone pays attention, because none of them are useless this late in the game. There is a two foot blind spot on Donghae’s route, and it is thankfully in an inconspicuous spot of the casino, where no one will notice a lurking stranger. Kyuhyun has his orders, and he knows the exact place where he should stand, how quick he must be, and exactly when Jongwoon and Ryeowook are going to block anyone from seeing anything they shouldn’t.
Sungmin has already picked six of his favorites, and they will be waiting nearby. Donghee will be staying in the room, working his magic. Everyone else will be out on the floor, everything down the smallest detail.
---
The night before the plan is set in motion, Sungmin gets into a fight protecting one of the workers, and even though the other man was knocked out, his nose broken in two places, and left with several cracked ribs, Sungmin had been injured just badly enough to fuck up the plan.
Now, he has to train Hankyung, the only other person who they think can do the job, how to do everything he has been trained to do. He has ten hours, but he’s done more with less. Once he is sure they really are good to go, he makes a phone call, and goes to bed. Kyuhyun can’t sleep, and he curses himself for always rooming with the youngest.
---
The computers have been loaded with all the latest in legal technology, and all the greatest in illegal. Donghee isn’t sure how he ends up with computer duty, since he is only second best, but Jungsu is trying to help Sungmin, who is trying to help Hankyung get used to the idea of crawling through the air ducts, silently. So Donghee is working mercilessly, getting the freeze frames ready so they can put them up at the exact second they’re needed.
Youngwoon is on the phone, and glances over at his work space. It sounds as if he is on the phone with Jongwoon, but is trying to reach Ryeowook.
“Have you guys finished?” The computer screen flickers for a moment, and a message pops up. Youngwoon hangs up, and comes to lurk over his shoulder.
‘rw15: since we’re all done down here, is it alright if I kill Jongwoon?’
---
Finally. Donghae and the giant square box he is pushing come into sight, followed by a security guard who looks like he could snap Kyuhyun in half. Heechul walks by, bats his eye lashes, and hikes up the already too short mini dress he is wearing. The guard predictably, takes a minute to admire him, and it is all Kyuhyun needs.
Donghae has the lid open, and Ryeowook and Jongwoon are staging a fight to distract the guard for a little longer while Kyuhyun slides inside the box, and makes himself fit. He wishes he had the confidence in Hankyung he has in Sungmin.
---
The security guard is gone; now Donghae is only being watched by cameras. He knows exactly where he is going, and makes no stops, or suspicious movements. He’s has been doing this for so long that even the hallway looks familiar to him.
He gets his authorization, inputs his employee codes along with several other passwords, and the vault is open. It is like the greatest temptation, but he already expects the feeling he gets when he see all that money, so he just pushes the cart inside, listens to the door lock behind him, and heads back to the casino.
Once he’s back out on the floor, he contacts Jungsu.
---
The ceiling, from the outside, is very nice. Hankyung can’t remember what it looks like, but he is sure the view is better than from the inside. Right now, he is crawling through air ducts following the path that Donghee has assured him is security free. Sure, he’s been chosen because he can crawl at a very fast, and very quiet, pace, but that doesn’t make it any less constricted.
He reaches the proper room, and Kyuhyun is already waiting, smug, and surrounded by bags. They do a quick check, to make sure nothing has been left behind, that Kyuhyun hasn’t suddenly started shedding hair all over the place, and finally Hankyung pulls him up into the duct.
“Bet you didn’t think I could do it.”
“No, I didn’t.” It is not meant to be offensive, and it isn’t because Hankyung still kind of doubts his own ability. Sungmin has done this for nearly eight years, and he has been doing this for almost ten and half hours. Kyuhyun replaces the cover, and does a quick once over to make sure that Hankyung hasn’t left anything behind.
“Even out the bags.” he says, and then they are moving.
---
It is easy, sitting in his office and waiting for the ceiling to open up and deliver the money. When it does, there are six strippers in the room, each looking expectantly at Sungmin. His arm hurts like a bitch, but the stripper he saved is smiling at him adoringly, so it’s kind of worth it.
Finally, Hankyung drops down from the roof, shocking the hell out of the unsuspecting women in the room, and Kyuhyun follows right after. Sungmin doesn’t look at all phased, just pleased, and says as much.
“Heechul will be happy.” It is an exaggeration, because anything Hankyung does is a disappointment to Heechul, but he at least won’t be able to blame him for getting them locked up in a cell. “You’ve got some grime in your hair?”
Kyuhyun actually laughs, and they distribute the money to the strippers.
---
Youngwoon is waiting outside the private entrance that only the strippers are allowed to use. Their bags are searched, but nobody bothers to check inside of their wallets. He is driving a disposable, nondescript black vehicle, and all six of them get in without incident.
He drives each one home, lets her out with her share of the money, and promises to make Sungmin call each of them at least once a week. It is a false promise, and he thinks they know it, but they all smile and thank him.
His phone starts ringing, a cheerful and annoying melody, and he is going to kill Ryeowook for changing it.
“Hey.” Donghee sounds like he’s been laughing, and still can’t quite stop. “Someone called the police. They took the money.” Youngwoon is pulling into the casino parking lot, and can see what he means. There are no flashing lights, because that draws attention and scares away the money, but there is an armored truck off to the side, and he can see Sungmin being led out in cuffs.
Nobody cares that he’s smiling.
---
The inside of the truck is bare, save for the money, which is behind bars, and as soon as he is seated, Sungmin looks at the helmeted officer opposite him, and grins. Once the vehicle gets moving, the officer reaches across, and removes the handcuffs.
As if he hasn’t just been arrested, and isn’t sitting in the back of an armored vehicle, Sungmin stretches, and continues grinning at the now helmetless Siwon, who is grinning back, and glances at the bags of money.
“That was just too easy.” The two of them laugh the whole way to the meeting spot, while Hyukjae hums in the front seat.
---
They leave in groups, leaving Jungsu and Kibum to check out. Donghae is bouncing in the backseat of a grey Volvo that they will be rid of once they meet up with the others. Kyuhyun is sitting in the front seat, smiling more than he ever does, because now they can just exist, not under aliases, or plotting, but as themselves.
They are meeting in a warehouse, and the first thing they do is lock it up, and get into the ugly, oversized van that has been waiting there the entire time. They get to talking about what they want to do, and it becomes apparent that no one is really all that okay with splitting up.
“God. Let’s just buy a mansion, and stop thinking about this.” Donghae is perfectly right, and they wonder where they should go. Siwon makes a comment about using god’s name in vain, and Hankyung is too late to stop Heechul from smacking him over the head.
They flee the country, and end up back where they started, except their house is bigger this time.
---
Nobody ever questions the thirteen men who live in the sprawling mansion. They are relatively nice, depending on which one you happen to run into, and they have the wildest parties. It’s not like they robbed a bank or anything.