[fic] No way to say, RxR, PG-15

Feb 08, 2009 18:00


Tittle : No way to say
Pairing : ReitaxRuki
Author : Read more... )

fic, reitaxruki

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kawasakininja February 9 2009, 18:55:30 UTC
I see you have a beta reader but English was still strange. I think the main problem was in the present tense you used to write this. Usually when people write stories they use past tense. It seems more natural somehow. I know people use present tense sometimes, but it is much harder to make it work in the story. The ending with Reita so easily accepting Ruki's discovery was little unbelievable. I know you wanted to wrap it up but it just seemed little bit too fast. Please don't be sad or offended. This is a constructive criticism. I know it's not easy to write fanfiction especially in a language which isn't your mother tongue, I personally found it too much of a trouble myself so I'm just reading them now.

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rukana February 10 2009, 03:44:26 UTC
I was proofing this at an ungodly hour and I've gone back and read it and am just now catching my mistakes. (-_-);;; Made me feel like crap, but I'll do better next time. I vow on that one. *determined look*

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torriee February 14 2009, 08:11:05 UTC
i still love you zozo X3~

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rukana February 16 2009, 05:30:21 UTC
Aw~, yay~! (^3^)
I love you too, Tori~!!!! (^______________^)

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torriee February 14 2009, 08:10:45 UTC
thank you for your critic.yes i knw it's kind of awkward in the end.. somehow what i intended to tell is not coming the way i want it to be. so it turn out to be like this. I'm learning.. so i'll work hard on my next story. thank you

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