detoxification
FRIDAY night... had its extreme highs (with the boy) and lows as always, my family always seem to like to make things hard for me. though sam, i'd have to say, i'm lucky to have him. it's amazing how you can grow up with someone yet be so fuckin different. there was major time wasting around the city till 10 (just missed out on seeing a car crash, tho saw the after effects; p plater skyline got pulled over n fined hehe; scary homeless ppl; mind numbing staring of the clock at the interstate part of central) but it was all definately worth it. chinatown nightmarkets, darling harbour, astral bar @ star city.... absolutely love that place, could have sat there all night. haha. silly alex was wearing a T and jeans, so had to talk to the bouncer + host first haha. they're funny. flashed a smile, n things were fine :) the morning was very young and i was going to have to leave as my brother wasn't gona stay up much longer to pick me up from the station, but to my suprise, alex had assumed that he was sending me home in his great jeep wrangler haha. such a gentleman. so twas last night when we had to go to a wedding dinner at pier 1, just under the harbour bridge, opposite the illuminating luna park. and boy did it hit me hard then. im not sure if it was the lack of choice of company, but was i missing him like what. and the speeches were so beautiful that there was not a single dry eye in the room, the atmosphere so romantic, i knew i was hooked. intoxicated senseless by the man. the process of detaching myself from him emotionally was meant to start last week, but meeting up with him everyday and seeing that cheeky grin never did much good. BUT for today, i am quite determined. 24 hrs, cold turkey. he's.... i don't know exactly what's up with him, (besides foncusion hehe). but i really need a break. not coz i want to, god no. but im just wary of the fact that i could possibly scare him, and scare myself even more. roughly have 15 hrs to go :)