let me tell you a story about an 8th grade sweetheart I lusted after until I was about 17 years old. Kymberly.
I was young, and didn't know how to express my emotions to a young woman. I had the "gentleman gene" though, I bent over backwards to make sure she knew I'd do anything for her.
My mistake.
Kym used me. She expected a lot of me, took time out of my personal life for her own selfish wants. It was my fault, I know, for being that type of person-but inside all I wanted was for her to love me. Oh, she did alright, she loved having a little slave boy to do whatever the fuck she pleased. It was embarrasing even, when she'd get me to do ridiculous things in front of other people. Not outrageous, but enough to make me feel bad.
I resented her. Yet, I still wanted her to love me. I needed her to love me. You see, everyone needs love. Just make sure you're giving out as much as you're asking for.
It was a lesson learned, and future relationships with other girls benefited from it. I don't resent all women, and I don't resent her anymore- I can admit that the fault lied in the way I altered who I was in order to get her approval. She wasn't a bad person, she just had an opportunity to get what she wanted from a hapless sap blinded by love.
If she hasn't changed, I hope that she's found a guy who finds comfort in that type of treatment-everyone has their thing. It just wasn't for me- I need an independant woman who can take care of herself, and share life with me instead of living it with me nipping at her heels.
Heh, I bet she's a dom.
NOW if you may be feeling offended, please note that I'm only telling you a
don't know why the rest didn't post...jasonktMay 1 2004, 06:08:10 UTC
story about my life and I don't know anything about your relationships except from what you've said about wanting to be pampered- so I'm only comparing what you've already told me to Kym, not the real way you treat people. You didn't say whether or not you return the love and kindness, so I'm not making judgements.
Re: don't know why the rest didn't post...toopretty4boysMay 1 2004, 11:14:33 UTC
lol... well, I DO return the love and kindness. At least, I think I do... I mean sure, I tend to not be able to financially do as much as I can for my lovers...it just works out that way. I'm poor. lol. But, I'm looking for something different this time around...women are different. I think that's a small part of why Lauren and I can be really good friends, but probably would not work out as a couple...because I want different things. Not that I'm complaining, but she treats me like men always did. And yeah, that's kinda what I want to do....this time around I want to DO the pampering. Even if it's mutual...I want to feel like a "gentleman" Women are just...I don't know, beautiful, and even fragile. I want to give the right girl what men could never give me...that's no offense to men, I'm just gay...and yeah, more or less, I'm just saying that for the longest time something was missing...now it's here...and I want it, really bad...a woman, of course.
I was young, and didn't know how to express my emotions to a young woman. I had the "gentleman gene" though, I bent over backwards to make sure she knew I'd do anything for her.
My mistake.
Kym used me. She expected a lot of me, took time out of my personal life for her own selfish wants. It was my fault, I know, for being that type of person-but inside all I wanted was for her to love me. Oh, she did alright, she loved having a little slave boy to do whatever the fuck she pleased. It was embarrasing even, when she'd get me to do ridiculous things in front of other people. Not outrageous, but enough to make me feel bad.
I resented her. Yet, I still wanted her to love me. I needed her to love me. You see, everyone needs love. Just make sure you're giving out as much as you're asking for.
It was a lesson learned, and future relationships with other girls benefited from it. I don't resent all women, and I don't resent her anymore- I can admit that the fault lied in the way I altered who I was in order to get her approval. She wasn't a bad person, she just had an opportunity to get what she wanted from a hapless sap blinded by love.
If she hasn't changed, I hope that she's found a guy who finds comfort in that type of treatment-everyone has their thing. It just wasn't for me- I need an independant woman who can take care of herself, and share life with me instead of living it with me nipping at her heels.
Heh, I bet she's a dom.
NOW if you may be feeling offended, please note that I'm only telling you a
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well, I DO return the love and kindness. At least, I think I do...
I mean sure, I tend to not be able to financially do as much as I can for my lovers...it just works out that way. I'm poor. lol. But, I'm looking for something different this time around...women are different. I think that's a small part of why Lauren and I can be really good friends, but probably would not work out as a couple...because I want different things. Not that I'm complaining, but she treats me like men always did. And yeah, that's kinda what I want to do....this time around I want to DO the pampering. Even if it's mutual...I want to feel like a "gentleman" Women are just...I don't know, beautiful, and even fragile. I want to give the right girl what men could never give me...that's no offense to men, I'm just gay...and yeah, more or less, I'm just saying that for the longest time something was missing...now it's here...and I want it, really bad...a woman, of course.
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