Gah, I want a fag ... and I don't even smoke.
It must seem like I whinge a lot ... and here I am, about to serve up another dose of it.
*blinks*
I NEED to be doing something. I don't know what though.
I was doing really well with the schoolwork off and on this week ... only one assignment away from having the third module caught up, I have printed off the next two modules, did a bunch of research on the final assignment for my computer course. On my last reflection form I had discussed my continuing struggle with time management and frustration at the lack of consistency in my interpretation of the assignments and that of my colleagues. Maybe they're not looking to get Honours, or maybe I'm just giving myself waaaaaaaaay too much work ... either way, my prof suggested that I keep an eye on the offerings already posted while I'm trying to catch up. So off I go this morning to check out the only other post in the folder in question, and realise that I'm way off in my research. Dangit.
Excuse me while I throw my hands up in frustration!
*breathes*
In other points of random neuroses, I am once again entirely too paranoid about work. The club, I mean. We were out there last night for Grandpa's bday dinner. It was the first time I'd seen Brenda in ages ... she pulled me into the kitchen for a quick catch up chat. (We've both been in the ER and on fairly serious drugs in the past month.) Two of the new guys looked at me oddly when I came in (I worked there for 6 years, went on a LoA to move to England, returned for a month or two, then went back onto LoA back in July and am still technically on it, so there are quite a few staff members who don't know me well anymore) ... I assured them it was all good, I used to work there. At which point the dishwasher replied "Don't you STILL work here Amy?" and Bren agreed, so I amended that I was on a LoA, but hopefully would be a more familiar face as soon as wedding season restarted with a vengeance. Later on I was chatting with the girls behind the bar, and they wanted to know when I was coming back ... Before I was laid off (@ New Years) I had told my boss that I would be completely avail again, whenever she needed me. No response. About a month ago, she came over to the table to give me an update on her daughter's situation (her uni had been on strike, and she had asked me to help with essays and the like while she was at home), and told me that the season was looking pretty dry this year thus far, but she'd call me as soon as it started to pick up. A few weeks ago they were incredibly short-staffed due to illnesses, and ... no call. Now, I had just injured myself, and wouldn't really have been able to do my job if she *had* called, and her other daughter knew I had hurt myself, so she might have decided to not bother ringing - but still, it hurt a bit. Definitely made me ponder. Hmmmm. And then last night, to have all the girls assume I was being chatted up in the kitchen b/c we were discussing me returning? Well I suppose on one hand that is a good sign - the rest of the staff thinks I'm both still working there, and are fully expecting me to return sooner rather than later. On the downside, I pissed her off back in October, and haven't gotten called since. Hmmmm.... No, not going to allow paranoia to reign!!! No, No, No!!!
Personal life is moving along... girl and I have been found out by a few mutual friends - but not all. ;) So as she puts it, it's nice to be able to be open around someone finally =P
I was supposed to be in BC in less than a week ... I am so incredibly bummed that I'm not going any more :(:(:( *sobs* Stupid economy suckage. *grumbles* I was SO looking forward to seeing Lori, Andrea, Jenni, and the other AT girls who were making the journey for the con... Huge thanks out to Lori and Andrea for offers of flat surfaces upon which to lay my stuff -- I *will* get out there to visit y'all! I will, dangit, I will! *misses friends*
On the upside, planning for activities in May is moving nicely along! *nods excitedly*
How sad is this?
Last night I'm taking a break on FB, and one of the girls from Ashton (the middle school I worked in back in Dunstable) has put up an album of photos from a staff dinner. It was all ppl with whom I hung out when I was on staff ... so if I was still there, presumably I would have been laughing there with them. It was highly bittersweet -- seeing all of them having such a great time makes me miss the good times back there even more. Then this morning, my parents are watching EastEnders. (Don't ask - they enjoy it!) I started to get even more homesick (the accents, the architecture, the geography, the food, the colloquialisms...) for England. I mentioned this to my folks, and Dad was indignant. As he put it, I *am* home. Sigh ... they just don't get it. I missed Canada while I was away, no argument there -- but I spent 2.5 years in England. I did a lot of growing up, and growing away from the nest, so to speak. Now I'm back, living with my folks yet again. Trying to be the proper perfect daughter once again. *snort* Regression, much?
I'm trying to stay away from any and all additional drama from the world of fandom, which, by its very nature, is full of dramatic people who are emphatic, enthusiastic, and full of emotions. The easiest way for me to keep myself out of trouble is to stay away from GW ... but I really miss the majority of the people and the sense of commraderie from there. I've found a few of the people here on LJ, which is decidedly cool, and there are quite a few peeps on FB of course ... but it's not quite the same. I'm debating about returning slowly -- not that I need another distraction, but the community on GW can be fun so long as the discussions are not taken too personally! And there are quite a few people on there who aren't active in these other forums (fori? hmmmm....)
And now I'm babbling. Again.
On the upside, I am feeling more emotionally balanced - LJ is highly cathartic, I find!
And now I'm off to do a mission with my Dad (his stapler has joined the ranks off all our other missing items *odd* and I am about to run out of ink for my printer) ... wee James' first bday party is tonight, although Mom is sick and Dad and I are both feeling off, so for the sake of not infecting James, we're contemplating not attending. =(
We'll see.
Anyways, thx for listening. I appreciate the soundingboards, even if you haven't a clue what I'm babbling on about! *hugs*
*blinks*
I NEED to be doing something. I don't know what though.
I was doing really well with the schoolwork off and on this week ... only one assignment away from having the third module caught up, I have printed off the next two modules, did a bunch of research on the final assignment for my computer course. On my last reflection form I had discussed my continuing struggle with time management and frustration at the lack of consistency in my interpretation of the assignments and that of my colleagues. Maybe they're not looking to get Honours, or maybe I'm just giving myself waaaaaaaaay too much work ... either way, my prof suggested that I keep an eye on the offerings already posted while I'm trying to catch up. So off I go this morning to check out the only other post in the folder in question, and realise that I'm way off in my research. Dangit.
Excuse me while I throw my hands up in frustration!
*breathes*
In other points of random neuroses, I am once again entirely too paranoid about work. The club, I mean. We were out there last night for Grandpa's bday dinner. It was the first time I'd seen Brenda in ages ... she pulled me into the kitchen for a quick catch up chat. (We've both been in the ER and on fairly serious drugs in the past month.) Two of the new guys looked at me oddly when I came in (I worked there for 6 years, went on a LoA to move to England, returned for a month or two, then went back onto LoA back in July and am still technically on it, so there are quite a few staff members who don't know me well anymore) ... I assured them it was all good, I used to work there. At which point the dishwasher replied "Don't you STILL work here Amy?" and Bren agreed, so I amended that I was on a LoA, but hopefully would be a more familiar face as soon as wedding season restarted with a vengeance. Later on I was chatting with the girls behind the bar, and they wanted to know when I was coming back ... Before I was laid off (@ New Years) I had told my boss that I would be completely avail again, whenever she needed me. No response. About a month ago, she came over to the table to give me an update on her daughter's situation (her uni had been on strike, and she had asked me to help with essays and the like while she was at home), and told me that the season was looking pretty dry this year thus far, but she'd call me as soon as it started to pick up. A few weeks ago they were incredibly short-staffed due to illnesses, and ... no call. Now, I had just injured myself, and wouldn't really have been able to do my job if she *had* called, and her other daughter knew I had hurt myself, so she might have decided to not bother ringing - but still, it hurt a bit. Definitely made me ponder. Hmmmm. And then last night, to have all the girls assume I was being chatted up in the kitchen b/c we were discussing me returning? Well I suppose on one hand that is a good sign - the rest of the staff thinks I'm both still working there, and are fully expecting me to return sooner rather than later. On the downside, I pissed her off back in October, and haven't gotten called since. Hmmmm.... No, not going to allow paranoia to reign!!! No, No, No!!!
Personal life is moving along... girl and I have been found out by a few mutual friends - but not all. ;) So as she puts it, it's nice to be able to be open around someone finally =P
I was supposed to be in BC in less than a week ... I am so incredibly bummed that I'm not going any more :(:(:( *sobs* Stupid economy suckage. *grumbles* I was SO looking forward to seeing Lori, Andrea, Jenni, and the other AT girls who were making the journey for the con... Huge thanks out to Lori and Andrea for offers of flat surfaces upon which to lay my stuff -- I *will* get out there to visit y'all! I will, dangit, I will! *misses friends*
On the upside, planning for activities in May is moving nicely along! *nods excitedly*
How sad is this?
Last night I'm taking a break on FB, and one of the girls from Ashton (the middle school I worked in back in Dunstable) has put up an album of photos from a staff dinner. It was all ppl with whom I hung out when I was on staff ... so if I was still there, presumably I would have been laughing there with them. It was highly bittersweet -- seeing all of them having such a great time makes me miss the good times back there even more. Then this morning, my parents are watching EastEnders. (Don't ask - they enjoy it!) I started to get even more homesick (the accents, the architecture, the geography, the food, the colloquialisms...) for England. I mentioned this to my folks, and Dad was indignant. As he put it, I *am* home. Sigh ... they just don't get it. I missed Canada while I was away, no argument there -- but I spent 2.5 years in England. I did a lot of growing up, and growing away from the nest, so to speak. Now I'm back, living with my folks yet again. Trying to be the proper perfect daughter once again. *snort* Regression, much?
I'm trying to stay away from any and all additional drama from the world of fandom, which, by its very nature, is full of dramatic people who are emphatic, enthusiastic, and full of emotions. The easiest way for me to keep myself out of trouble is to stay away from GW ... but I really miss the majority of the people and the sense of commraderie from there. I've found a few of the people here on LJ, which is decidedly cool, and there are quite a few peeps on FB of course ... but it's not quite the same. I'm debating about returning slowly -- not that I need another distraction, but the community on GW can be fun so long as the discussions are not taken too personally! And there are quite a few people on there who aren't active in these other forums (fori? hmmmm....)
And now I'm babbling. Again.
On the upside, I am feeling more emotionally balanced - LJ is highly cathartic, I find!
And now I'm off to do a mission with my Dad (his stapler has joined the ranks off all our other missing items *odd* and I am about to run out of ink for my printer) ... wee James' first bday party is tonight, although Mom is sick and Dad and I are both feeling off, so for the sake of not infecting James, we're contemplating not attending. =(
We'll see.
Anyways, thx for listening. I appreciate the soundingboards, even if you haven't a clue what I'm babbling on about! *hugs*