(no subject)
I've been trying to write in here for about a month, but I lose my inspiration about half way through, but I'm working on this damn video to capture, so I'll see if i can force it through.
Well, lets see. Summer is almost over. I'm a little sad, it seems I've spent all my time at Baby A's working for the pink elephant I hate so much. Julie and I are working on a DVD for the church will hopefully pay some bills. I moved into a new house, so everyone should be ready I think we need a party there really soon.
As far as my personal life goes, things have been pretty stagnant. I'm in the same position I was in February. Its amazing how a full time restaurant job makes you feel like you have been in a coma for two months.
I unlinked my facebook from my livejournal so I guess I can write about it. I think the coma might have been self-induced though. I'm trying to figure out why I'm happy to just be friends with people when at times, I know I want more. When I know, i just want to step outside of my comfort zone without fear of risking everything. It also has alot to do with the fact that this one will be moving away at some point, best case scenario its Houston or Boulder, Colorado. And when that happens, this one is going to hurt like nothing I've ever felt. I had the weirdest moment of clarity which confirms that there is something different about them.
I can't explain it, but I took her to meet her twin sister in Houston in the most impromptu weekend of my life. It was a completely packed club, and it was like no one was there but the two of them. It was like all the sound drained out and they were just dancing. I was standing below the stage holding their drinks realizing that this night wasn't about me, and then the most bizarre portion of the night occurred. I got all cold and it was like no one else was there, and I suddenly understood that there was a connection between them that was deeper than anything I had ever seen. It was like they were completely happy, and unfortunately, I typically would have been jealous I believe, but there something humbling about experiencing two people who complete each other. Its like you realize how freaking lucky you were to just be able to experience something like it, even though you are on the outside looking in.
I know this sounds ridiculous, but its how I felt.
Well, lets see. Summer is almost over. I'm a little sad, it seems I've spent all my time at Baby A's working for the pink elephant I hate so much. Julie and I are working on a DVD for the church will hopefully pay some bills. I moved into a new house, so everyone should be ready I think we need a party there really soon.
As far as my personal life goes, things have been pretty stagnant. I'm in the same position I was in February. Its amazing how a full time restaurant job makes you feel like you have been in a coma for two months.
I unlinked my facebook from my livejournal so I guess I can write about it. I think the coma might have been self-induced though. I'm trying to figure out why I'm happy to just be friends with people when at times, I know I want more. When I know, i just want to step outside of my comfort zone without fear of risking everything. It also has alot to do with the fact that this one will be moving away at some point, best case scenario its Houston or Boulder, Colorado. And when that happens, this one is going to hurt like nothing I've ever felt. I had the weirdest moment of clarity which confirms that there is something different about them.
I can't explain it, but I took her to meet her twin sister in Houston in the most impromptu weekend of my life. It was a completely packed club, and it was like no one was there but the two of them. It was like all the sound drained out and they were just dancing. I was standing below the stage holding their drinks realizing that this night wasn't about me, and then the most bizarre portion of the night occurred. I got all cold and it was like no one else was there, and I suddenly understood that there was a connection between them that was deeper than anything I had ever seen. It was like they were completely happy, and unfortunately, I typically would have been jealous I believe, but there something humbling about experiencing two people who complete each other. Its like you realize how freaking lucky you were to just be able to experience something like it, even though you are on the outside looking in.
I know this sounds ridiculous, but its how I felt.