I <3 my BFF
Last night my BFF and I got super stoned and took turns picking pores, removing blackheads & squeezing unspeakable nastiness out of clogged skin ducts- then trying to gross each other out and see who could produce the sickest amount of silly string. It was foul, oh so foul- but tons of fun. (I told him we probably looked like a pair of really retarded monkeys LOL.)
He's got this one really gnarly pore (hole?) on the bridge of his nose where he had a sliver of glass embedded in a car wreck years ago, and it tends to build up a ton of crud; I got both fingers around that fucker and made it give birth to an inch long black turdlike thing LOL. I got another one (not as big, sadly) from a similar spot next to his ear. He popped a really juicy zit on my back, which managed to spurt right into his mouth (he was busy talking & it made him gag LOL). Oh, and he's spent the last 2 days producing crippling, eye-watering amounts of toxic ass vapor...the kind that crawls along the floor, climbs up your nostril and punches you directly in the brain- and FOLLOWS you when you try and run away from the stench. My house still smells like his raunchy ass, lol.
He's a hairy bastard, too; I've never seen someone with coarse dark hair growing on their nose before, nor have I seen someone who has excess hair (eyelashes?) growing in the corners of their eyes. I must have spent 2 hours tweezing hairs from places it normally doesn't grow- I would have done more, but he was being a pussy about it (I threatened to take the electric clippers and make him look like a shaved weasel LOL).
Oops- almost forgot, I gave him a couple of q-tips and let him root around in his ears- holy fuckballs, that boy pulled something that looked like a big brown carrot (hard, HARD wax) out of one ear, and a ton of yellow-brownish shit out of the other. And he's got an infected hair on his arm that's turned into an abscess, so I got to pop that as well.
yeah, I love my gross dudebro BFF lulz
He's got this one really gnarly pore (hole?) on the bridge of his nose where he had a sliver of glass embedded in a car wreck years ago, and it tends to build up a ton of crud; I got both fingers around that fucker and made it give birth to an inch long black turdlike thing LOL. I got another one (not as big, sadly) from a similar spot next to his ear. He popped a really juicy zit on my back, which managed to spurt right into his mouth (he was busy talking & it made him gag LOL). Oh, and he's spent the last 2 days producing crippling, eye-watering amounts of toxic ass vapor...the kind that crawls along the floor, climbs up your nostril and punches you directly in the brain- and FOLLOWS you when you try and run away from the stench. My house still smells like his raunchy ass, lol.
He's a hairy bastard, too; I've never seen someone with coarse dark hair growing on their nose before, nor have I seen someone who has excess hair (eyelashes?) growing in the corners of their eyes. I must have spent 2 hours tweezing hairs from places it normally doesn't grow- I would have done more, but he was being a pussy about it (I threatened to take the electric clippers and make him look like a shaved weasel LOL).
Oops- almost forgot, I gave him a couple of q-tips and let him root around in his ears- holy fuckballs, that boy pulled something that looked like a big brown carrot (hard, HARD wax) out of one ear, and a ton of yellow-brownish shit out of the other. And he's got an infected hair on his arm that's turned into an abscess, so I got to pop that as well.
yeah, I love my gross dudebro BFF lulz