NEW: Nothing to Any Purpose That the World Can Say Against it - Sequel to "Shakespearean Cupids"!
Title: Nothing to Any Purpose That the World Can Say Against It
Rating: a heavy T/PG-13, that may push toward M/R later in the story
Author: tkel_paris , aka KendraC
Summary: Sequel to “Shakespearean Cupids.” A distress call interrupts the Doctor and Donna's journey as a new couple, forcing them and Jenny to face mistakes he made... because of Rose Tyler...?
Disclaimer: Shakespeare's works are public domain - but I give credit to the Bard where its due. Doctor Who belongs to people on the other side of the pond - as some put it. I doubt I would've come up with this series if Series 4 had ended with more thought put into it... Then again, what do fanfic writers live for but to rewrite the episodes into something better...?
Author's Note for the Whole Story: Okay, people... You've seen one Shakespearean idea from me. Here comes the follow-up. I started Shakespearean Cupids without much of an outline, so I got surprised when Muse took it to the angst levels that she did. So this time, I started with a more detailed outline before I started writing. Now I know overall what I'm getting myself into with this story.
First off, this one - although I'll do my best to keep the humor that we all love in D/D stories flowing wherever possible - is going to have a much more serious tone. “Much Ado About Nothing” will still have influence on this story, but now we move to the more severe tones of “The Merchant of Venice” and “Measure for Measure.” You may wonder about the choices now, but given all the issues that our beloved now-no-longer-claiming-to-not-be-a couple have to deal with, I think you'll agree with the use of those two serious plays.
Also, Jenny's story arc needed a more serious backdrop to play out against. I don't promise to not give her another crash course in her Dad's life, but this time she won't be alone...
And brace yourselves. Each chapter is fixing to be on the lengthy side... At least it'll mean more story for you to enjoy. And keep the ideas coming! You never know what you might inspire!
And my beta inspired one hell of a plot bunny for later on in this story. Let's just say... be prepared to be freaked out... At least a little bit... (River style wink)
CHAPTER ONE: MODESTLY EXAMINE THEMSELVES
Awareness slowly came to Jenny's mind. It was like swimming in molasses. The fog she found herself in mentally started to unnerve her - until memories of the previous day flickered into being.
Another choking sob erupted from her lips. Nearly losing her parents... The whole River debacle... Then she noticed that she couldn't move much, and tried to scream.
“Shh...” The sound of her mother's voice startled her out of the crying, and Jenny turned toward it. Her Mum was lying next to her - holding one of her hands, Jenny suddenly realized, and she'd had an arm over her belly. As the warm and free hand stroked the side of her face, Jenny also realized that there'd been another arm over her belly - her father's. He was lying on the other side, holding her other hand.
The Doctor squeezed Jenny's hand. “It's over, Jenny. The nightmare's over. We're a full day past it.”
Just knowing that she was surrounded by her closest family soothed Jenny's frayed nerves, and allowed her to relax back into the bed. “You're really here...”
Donna sighed. It's gonna take a long time for her to heal, she thought. “Sleep alright?”
Jenny found a tiny smile. “I think that was what it's like to sleep like a baby.”
The Doctor managed a faint ghost of his usual grin. “That was the idea.”
Donna gently tugged on Jenny's hand. “Come on, let's get a little breakfast into you, and then we'll go from there.” She got up, making Jenny wonder how this would work since neither of her parents was letting go. But then her Dad picked himself up, and gently motioned her to follow her Mum - who, she then noticed, had removed her own ponytail sometime during the night and had her hair flowing haphazardly.
Which made a part of her mind wonder: Had her mother ever willingly been in her father's presence looking like she'd just rolled out of bed...?
The TARDIS had moved the kitchen entrance to right outside Jenny's room. So, the Time Lady vaguely realized, even the Old Girl is babying me... “I'm not that hungry,” she whispered.
The Doctor grinned, remembering more than a few times when he'd felt the same after an adventure that went poorly. “Then just tea and biscuits for you. I'll even open my own tin.”
Donna laughed, a little stunned. “You mean the one,” she demanded as they guided Jenny to sit on one of the dining chairs, “that you keep hidden?! What do you keep in there?!”
His expression was a strange mix of a smirk and a hurt pout. “Only the best ones, the ones that lift me a bit out of the doldrums.”
Are they not quite, Jenny noted silently, letting each other out of their sights...? How are they managing to not hit anything...?
Donna scowled as she poured water into the kettle and started it, darkly commenting, “You couldn't have shared those after Pompeii?!”
The Doctor, having just pulled that mysterious tin out of the cupboard, startled at the hint of disapproval. “Well, I've never shared them with anyone before! Do you expect me to change centuries of habits overnight?!”
She snorted. “No, but I expect to get to try the things that you enjoy! I might not like them, but at least I'd get another experience under my belt!”
Jenny laughed. A real, pleased laugh over things practically seeming normal again. As in before the plan was formed!
Her parents turned, surprised at the sound - and profoundly grateful. “There,” the Doctor said with his usual smile, “that's my little girl.” He plated a number of biscuits, and handed an extra to Donna. “You'll be perfectly fine soon enough!”
Donna rolled her eyes. Surely it'll take longer than you think, Sunshine! She bit off a piece, and snorted over the taste.
Jenny's eyebrows raised over the reaction. “What, Mum?”
Quickly chewing to be able to speak, Donna swallowed and had to tease her Martian boy. “Chocolate and banana?!”
The Doctor shrugged. “I change what I keep in there with each regeneration. This one likes both of those, and I found some lovely ones on one of my adventures on my own.
Which, Jenny realized, probably meant his time between meeting Mum and meeting Martha... She took a bite, not trusting herself to not comment disparagingly on a certain companion... Wait for the tea...
The kettle mercifully signaled, but it didn't stop Donna from shaking her head. Any other day, I'd continue my rant, but I guess I'll stop there. She absently bit into the biscuit again as she poured tea - not wanting to admit that it was one of the tastiest biscuits she'd ever had.
The Doctor noted that Donna hadn't indicated - aside from the exclamation when she tasted it - that she hated that flavor. Maybe I'll share a little more often, he thought. Turning to Jenny, who'd made quick work of what was on her plate, he raised an eyebrow. “Hungry after all?”
Jenny shrugged as Donna handed her a cup. “A bit,” she owned after swallowing. “But not now. I'd like to wait before really having a meal.” She blew over the cup, after letting the scents soothe her.
Donna sighed. “Oh, well. I guess we're cooking for just you and me, Spaceman. What'll it be today?”
Knowing he ought to help, the Doctor thought about what he could manage without embarrassing himself. “Well... We're pretty well stocked. I'll let you choose.”
Looking up from a sip, Jenny noticed something - which made her block out her parents' talk about what to cook. They're standing a lot closer than usual... If they get any closer, they'll be sharing breaths! And... their hands... They keep reaching for each other... And I felt their arms over me when I woke... They wanted to reach each other even in sleep...?! She put down her cup. “What's going on?”
That stopped them both. Simultaneously, they exclaimed, “What?!” And were startled at how in sync they were.
Jenny wanted to laugh, but felt it wasn't advisable. “Um... How about how close you're standing to each other? Or how much you're nearly touching - apparently without thinking about it? What happened to the two of you?”
Donna and the Doctor blushed. It was time... She cleared her throat. “Well, the whole story... I don't think we're quite ready to tell it, but...”
The Doctor's own smile matched the fondness in Donna's as he wrapped an arm around her waist - and his insides tingled when she returned the gesture. They met Jenny's stunned face as he said, softly, “We're together now. That's all right with you, isn't it?” He remembered her anger back when she was talking with Martha and Sylvia, and hoped she wouldn't remind him of his past mistakes...
God bless CAL! Jenny shrieked wordlessly and bounced out of her chair to run around to hug them both. “Oh, my God! This is what I wanted to happen! I knew you were perfect for each other! Now I can heal; something good came out of yesterday!”
Her parents blushed again, remembering the worst parts of their experience. It was just like one of his adventures to have considerable pain to go with the joys...
Jenny pulled out of the embrace. “Well, then, you don't need to mind me!” She grabbed her cup. “I'll keep myself occupied. You two go have some fun,” she called as she hurried out of the room. But then she stopped and stuck her head back in as an embarrassing thought hit her. “Just... please remind the Old Girl to muffle any sounds.” She didn't stay to watch the matching blushes bloom over their faces - but she giggled silently over throwing them for a loop. Got to tell my co-conspirators right now!
Donna recovered her voice first. “Oi, we need to talk with Captain Jack over what he tells her! He has no right telling our girl about the birds and the bees before we do!” Although she shivered a little over the ideas that the words planted. That interrupted post-wedding moment in CAL's world left her imagination trying to fill in the blanks...
The Doctor couldn't speak. He found himself more concerned over something else, something also prompted by the memory of that particular moment in the fantasy world. Oh, Rassilon, I don't know the first thing about what Donna might expect... or what to do...
Over the link, Jack pumped his fist in the air. “Yes! We are the only love-gods!” Oh, I'm good!
Sarah Jane laughed, shaking her head. Crazy hormonal fool... “And we didn't need the letters after all. I hadn't thought it possible.”
Martha grinned. You might think you're good, Jack, but I'm better! The Shakespeare part was my idea... “Congratulations, Jenny. Sounds like you might've helped them see the light.”
Jenny shrugged, feeling a bit of the euphoria come off. “Well, I'll admit that... the person I mentioned... seemed to help more than anything. She pushed them out of their denials, and I think things would've progressed anyway without the computer world.” She'd thrown a dressing gown on before going for her computer to signal the co-conspirators for the talk they'd agreed upon... just yesterday.
Sylvia demanded, “And you don't know what happened to them there?” Trapped as an energy signature... It doesn't seem possible!
When Jenny shook her head, Wilf sighed. “Well, it doesn't matter. But now comes the hard part.”
Jenny frowned. I thought coming and sitting in the TARDIS library would be the roughest thing I did all day. “What's that?”
Wilf smiled over his youngest girl's naivety. “Making sure they make it work.”
Sarah Jane nodded. “Yes, that's the part that all the romance novels in the world don't bother with. Everyone only cares about people getting together, which ignores the whole part of what actually happens after the whole 'happily ever after' bit.”
Jenny opened her mouth to comment, and then felt the room shift around her. She realized that an extra shelf appeared - largely blocking her view of the big reclining couch in the center of the room. A nudge came from the TARDIS: Be quiet, Jenny. They're coming.
She flinched. “Blimey!” She grabbed pen and paper from her side. “Hope you've got some of this,” she hissed at the screen. “We're getting company!”
There was a quick hustle as each person grabbed what was near - although Sylvia rushed away to get the needed implements. Jack grinned, “Well, now we get to be the eavesdroppers.”
Jenny couldn't help it. She had to flip him that rude gesture from a week ago.
“Jenny,” her grandmother and great-grandfather admonished.
But they didn't get any further; the door opened and they heard footsteps slowly enter. Everyone held their breath a moment.
The Doctor sighed, holding Donna's hand tighter. “Are you ready for this?”
Jack's grin grew. Martha quickly wrote: Shut it, Jack!
Donna took a deep breath and nodded. We can't let that place ruin this one.”
Sarah Jane wrote, as they heard the two walk into the room, and turned her paper to show: Was it really that bad, Jenny?
The couple walked to the couch - which hadn't quite been there when Jenny entered earlier - and slowly stretched out to rest side by side. She lay on his right side, and he was closer to the door. It was as much because neither wanted to let go of the other's hand to change positions.
It also meant that Jenny could just barely see them without being noticed herself. Glad Jack can't see this, she thought idly as she wrote an answer to Sarah Jane: Worse.
They both sighed as they relaxed into the over-sized cushions. “No infected shadows,” Donna reflected aloud, “no emergency, no one injecting themselves into our lives... Feels almost strange to have such a long moment of peace.” And I'm too tired to even care that my hair's a tangled mess...
Sylvia had the next comment: Did she feel threatened by this... person you mentioned?
The Doctor snorted. “I never said it was a quiet life I lead.” She must remember the whole of our Adipose Industries adventure, after all...
Jenny smirked at her father's words as she showed her reply: Yes. She was the catalyst for Mum ceasing her denial - which I'm thankful for.
“But,” Donna commented, “did you ever stop to enjoy the moments of silence and peace whenever they came along?”
Jack, raising an eyebrow at what he overheard, quickly wrote: Hope I get to meet her one day.
Oh, my God... Jenny hoped her shudder was all the answer the Immortal needed... After those comments about dating androids, the last thing I need is for those two to meet!
The Doctor sighed. She's got me there... “No. You've reminded me of that. Guess I've spent too muc time running. Be it in exile or from events I caused... The quiet always seemed like an opportunity for all my regrets to pile on me.”
Sarah Jane felt tears forming. She had to cover her mouth in case a cry tried to emerge. No one had a
thought they wanted to voice over that line...
“Oh...” Donna reached with her free hand to rub his scalp. “My poor Spaceman... Carrying the burdens of
the universe on your shoulders alone for too long...”
The Doctor closed his eyes as her fingers slowly and gently worked out tension that he hadn't realized he was carrying. It was a sign of how comfortable he was with Donna that he wasn't embarrassed by the deep purr he let out.
Jack's eyebrows raised in intrigue, and Jenny rushed to write: She's just massaging his head, you pervert!
He had a ready retort: Obviously the wrong one...
It took each of the others on the link all their willpower to not groan aloud. Typical Jack, Martha silently griped as she rubbed her forehead. Sylvia and Wilf just didn't want to hear anything like that, and glared at him. Sarah Jane just shook her head in warning as Jenny glowered at the randy Captain.
Donna smiled fondly as she watched stress melt away - just from that one area. “No one ever did this for you?” What a shame if this is the first time...
Jenny stopped to look up, which managed to relieve the tension brought by Jack just being himself. A chance
to learn about Dad's people...?
The Doctor had to try several times to make his voice work. “Never... knew... but I... should've guessed since... Oh, that's nice... Since Time Lords... are... touch telepaths...”
Donna froze. “You mean you can hear what I'm thinking?”
Jack grinned, but he didn't bother to write his obvious thought: That would be handy...
Her hand freezing drew the Doctor out of his induced stupor. He forced his eyes to meet Donna's. “No. No, that'd require...” He swallowed as potential implications hit him. “I'd have to activate the link, since humans aren't naturally telepathic.”
Jenny frowned, her eyes briefly flickering toward Jack. Could've fooled me, she thought as she recalled how well Jack seemed to read his human counterparts.
Donna thought about that. “But it... Is it possible outside of that thing you did on the Oodsphere?”
Everyone looked at Jenny, wondering what they were talking about. Jenny shrugged; she was at a loss.
The Doctor nodded slowly. “I... I could start the process of us developing a bond that would allow us to hear each other's thoughts at times - without what I did so you could hear the Ood Song.”
Wilf wrote quickly: Do you know what he's on about?
Jenny shook her head, quickly scribbling: There's so much I still don't know about being Gallifreyan. I know more about being human!
Donna tried to figure out the implications, and was drawing a blank. I need to know more... “What would that mean for us? Could we start it now?”
Six pairs of eyebrows raised in curiosity. And other mixed reactions...
The Doctor took a deep breath. How to explain this when things are so new between us...? “Donna... It'd be a permanent link between us, binding us together... forever.” And it reminded him, once again, of the fantasy world...
Six jaws dropped. This, Sarah Jane vaguely thought, is a learning experience for us all...
Donna saw the intensity in his gaze, and thought she saw hints of remembering yesterday in his eyes. It gave her a clue. “You mean like...” She hesitated, not sure if she should voice the thought, but not knowing what else to say. “Like... a form of marriage...?”
Sylvia's eyes went wider than anyone else's. Oh, my God, what does this mean for my daughter?!
The Doctor nodded slowly. “I'm not entirely sure how it'd work, but I know it's possible. One of my companions married a Citidel guard, and even had a child.”
Donna gasped. “Then... we could...”
Wilf's eyes lit up, and he nudged Sylvia - who was surprised over the feelings the idea engendered...
The Doctor found a tiny smile. “Yeah.” And it scares me just how much I... really like the idea of little versions of Donna running around the TARDIS...
Martha smirked, and wrote in the silence: Better get ready to be a big sister, Jenny.
The silence was long enough that Jenny was able to write: I wonder what my responsibilities would be.
Donna cleared her throat. Looking that long into the deep eyes of the alien she'd grown to love brought a number of memories back. And none of them made her comfortable. Instead, she had to voice concerns. “Wouldn't this affect your bonds with-” She cut herself off at his shaking his head.
“No, Donna,” he said quietly but firmly. “I was never bonded with any of my wives.”
Jenny's eyes popped the widest of the group's. What the hell...?!
“Time Lords,” the Doctor tried to explain to a clearly shocked Donna, “weren't supposed to get too close to anyone. Including their own family. Affection even between parent and child was discouraged since there'd be a separation when we're exposed to the Temporal Schism.”
“You mean,” Donna whispered in horror, “that you lived nearly all your life without knowing what it's like to be loved?”
Everyone froze. Jack couldn't move his mouth or blink. The others all covered their mouths to prevent cries
or whimpers over the very idea that Donna's words painted.
Must not cry, the Doctor told himself, must not cry... “Closest I came to that was my... youngest grandchild.” He had no idea of the shock that created in the other part of the room, and continued to an enraptured Donna, “She joined me when I was first exiled, took the human name Susan Foreman, and looked after the old man that I physically was then.”
“That,” Donna had to ask, “was your... first self?”
He nodded. “Nothing hurt more than when she fell in love. With a human man,” he added, not quite keeping the hysteria out of his laugh at the irony. “I... didn't part on good terms with her.”
“But,” Donna interjected, “is she somewhere outside of the Time Lock?”
Jenny sucked in a breath. I might have family I could visit...?
The Doctor nodded slowly. “I'm not sure how I'd be received...”
Donna squeezed his hand, and cupped the side of his face. “Will you try? And let Jenny and me help you two
reconcile?”
Wilf quickly wrote: How much do you know about your father's family?
It seemed too good to be true, but how many times had Donna been right about matters of emotions? The Doctor returned the squeeze. “Okay, but... I'm not ready.”
While he'd been thinking, Jenny was able to write, and show while he did speak: Not much, evidently.
Donna suppressed a snort. “No one's ever ready to face someone they hurt, or who hurt them. But,” she added sagely, “I think we should wait until we've... figured things out more...” Another thought hit her, and it brought every one of her insecurities to bear on her conscious mind.
The Doctor's eyes widened as he could see Donna withdraw a bit. “What is it?”
Everyone on Jenny's screen raised their eyebrows as Jenny's expression took an alarmed turn. What now, she
mouthed.
Donna thought about shaking her head and keeping it to herself. But, she quickly realized, haven't I been
encouraging him to not hold things in? And won't this worry me always if I don't voice it...?
The Doctor took both of her hands. He made sure his voice was as gentle as could be. “Donna, I can't be the only one who admits to difficult things. What's troubling you?”
The conspirators had to remind themselves to breathe. They all knew they were about to hear something that maybe they shouldn't know about...
Donna swallowed. Here goes what could ruin what's growing between us... “I just...” Must force it all out... “God, I want to be the one you've chosen-”
“And you are!” The Doctor couldn't believe that she'd be the insecure one after all they went through the previous day. Although he could believe that being the strong one had taken a lot out of her...
The conspirators shared a smile. Their gleaming eyes shared in the triumph of success.
Donna sighed. And blurted out the rest before she could stop her mouth: “But I can't help but worry about
where I'd stand if - somehow - Rose came back.”
That shocked him.
But not as much as it shocked the conspirators. Jenny clenched her fists. God, she mouthed, why did she
have to mention that creature's name?!
Martha's face paled. She could see where Donna's fears came from, having lived through feeling like second-best to the memory of the previous companion.
Sarah Jane flinched. Oh, God... How much does he still feel...?
Jack froze stiff. I'd have to distract Rose somehow, he knew. Because these two are too good for each other!
Surely Ianto would understand that it'd be temporary...
Sylvia and Wilf clasped each other's hands. This might mean more hurt for their Donna, and they could do
nothing about it...
The Doctor, for the first time, really saw how much he'd allowed the specter of one companion to shadow the
experiences of the subsequent ones. And here, he knew, was the one who would be hurt the most by it...
Donna wasn't surprised by how silent he was, and felt a need to withdraw. But she couldn't. The Doctor took
both of her hands in his left, and drew her against him with his right arm. He... Is he...?
Jenny watched with baited breath. And the others listened equally attentively. Especially when she dashed
out, with considerable relief: He's pulled her into his arms!
The Doctor looked right into Donna's teary eyes, and knew he had to come clean about something that was
becoming clearer to him. “Remember when I told you about what happened the last time I saw the Ood?”
To the conspirators, it was a non-sequitor that made them frown. And gave them one thought: What?!
Donna blinked, surprised. She had to think a moment to recall what he meant. And then it hit her. “Yeah,
on Kroptor. The Impossible Planet, you said it was also called. Rose was there, right?”
He nodded. “There was a moment when it seemed like we'd lost the TARDIS to a quake.” He couldn't quite
use the term 'earthquake' since they hadn't been on Earth at the time.
Donna gasped. “Oh, God, that must've felt terrible. You have a link with her!”
The Doctor closed his eyes a moment against the memory of how painful that had felt. He cleared his
throat to continue the story. “Rose started talking about getting a mortgage.”
Sarah Jane and Martha's eyes popped wide. Oh, they thought as one, that doesn't sound good... They could
both remember certain things that suggested that he hadn't reacted well to it.
“Donna,” the Doctor said, looking back into her eyes, “I nearly had a panic attack. In the midst of a dangerous situation, where the Ood were... possessed by a creature that looked like it could've been the Devil itself.”
Once again, eyebrows raised and jaws dropped, but Jenny - unlike the others - had a clue about what
had happened. Benefits of researching Dad's past companions...
He continued, not giving Donna a chance to comment, “I've been thinking about that reaction ever since. I had a lot of time to think about it when Martha and I were trapped in 1969.”
Martha flinched, but didn't write any comments. Maybe I'll finally get some answers!
Donna adjusted her hands so they were holding his. I know that was a rough time for both of them... She nodded, hoping he saw the encouragement to keep talking; he clearly, she thought, needed to get it out.
“At first I thought I just wasn't the type to handle domestic things. That what my last self had hoped for was a whimsy that could never be.” He sighed and grinned in consternation. “But then I realized just how much the things we do on a daily basis qualify as domestic, and I'm not bothered by any of that!”
Donna's eyes widened, and she had to interrupt. “Not for a moment...?”
He shook his head. “And I think I know why.” He had to swallow again to get the words out, and he forced himself to overcome every instinct he'd built over his entire life because this was too important to screw up. He breathed, “Because when I'm with you, I feel like I'm home. I don't have to run from my past. I can face it, and it doesn't hurt so much. What I said in that dream world we were in is truer than I knew: I finally can relax and be myself. No one's putting me on a pedestal that I can't come off of to just be a person. I have found a true friend and partner... in you, Donna.”
There wasn't a dry eye in the room at that point. Tears were falling - at varying paces - from eight pairs of eyes. Only Jack and Wilf were just barely holding them in check. The women were all too moved to restrain theirs - even the disbelieving Martha, who slowly started writing.
Donna managed to swallow enough to make her voice work, although it was shaky. “Then... if she...”
The Doctor sighed, not liking how much Donna had tormented herself with thoughts of self-doubt. A long-standing habit, he realized sadly. And filled him with a new determination. “Then I'd have to break her heart, because I won't let you go to anything but your own old age.”
Jack's jaw dropped farther than anyone's. And he had competition for most stunned expression...
Donna's tears fell rapidly, and she leaned in to bury her face in his neck. Oh, my God... He's... He's choosing me over her...! Oh, God, please don't let Rose find a way to cross back over; I don't want her to get her heart broken again...!
Martha turned her paper to the screen: Did he actually just talk about his own feelings...?
The Doctor felt tears fall from his face into Donna's hair as he pulled her closer and released her hands to run his other one through the ginger locks he adored - planting a gentle kiss on the top of her head. As he absently undid the tangles she'd muttered a few complaints about earlier, he realized that she, too, had never felt truly loved. Yes, she'd known the love of family members, but never from a man... It filled his hearts with an anger that he had to keep her from detecting; she needed him to calm her, and so he had to push aside any ideas of avenging the slights she'd suffered over the years.
Although he was going to find out the names of every man who ever hurt her or contributed in any way to her abundance of self-doubt. Whoever Sylvia and Wilf didn't know about, surely her friends would - and he was absolutely sure that he could charm them into giving him the information on where to find those losers... so he could ruin their lives a bit...
Oh, he wouldn't kill them; he remembered telling Jenny how killing changes a person, and he still wanted to steer as far from his actions stemming from the Time War as possible. Mind, it would take a lot more restraint if it turned out that anyone had physically harmed Donna. Then, he thought, I suppose my revenge will have to be a bit more public...
Nothing less would calm the Oncoming Storm he could feel brewing slowly... One that might have been developing ever since he overheard Jenny and Martha and Sylvia...
Jenny was a little concerned over the tense play of emotions on her Dad's face. The only thing she could figure out, she wrote: Looks like he's hurting because she's hurting.
Sylvia promptly answered: Let's hope he's strong enough at the moment for the both of them...
Concerned over Donna's continued tears, a sign of how deep the hurt ran, the Doctor pulled her into an upright position so he could lift her up - bridal style. She might need the comfort of her own room right now, he thought.
The movements brought Donna back to an awareness of her surroundings. “Oi,” she protested, although the continuing tears made it sound less forceful than usual, “what are you doing?”
He met her gaze when it lifted from his neck. “Will you let me take care of you for just a little while, my Earthgirl? So we can both take care of our Spacegirl?”
Jenny had to swallow a snort. Her mother had dubbed her that during that first time meeting Jack and the others, although she hadn't used it since. Suppose it fits... I am my Dad's girl...
Donna had to sigh in the face of the Puppy-Dog Eyes. Blimey, I'm gonna have to relearn to steel myself against those... “Oh, all right, you bloody prawn,” she acquiesced, pretending to not like it at all. Really, she thought, I'm not used to having someone just want to take care of me - and be able to do it!
Relishing the temporary change in their dynamic, the Doctor grinned - letting go, for the moment, of his revenge fantasies - as he carried her toward her room. “You know, Donna,” he teased, “your insults are starting to sound like signs of affection.”
Donna lightly poked him in the chest. “Watch it, Sunshine! Do you think any of your secrets are safe? Your ship sides with me every time!”
The Doctor managed to close the door with his foot, deliberately trying to forget that moment from their shared dream. His answer didn't make it through the door.
Jenny couldn't stop a laugh - although she kept it quiet. “He carried her out! And he combed her hair with his fingers!”
Jack laughed. “Oh, he's even more far gone than we'd thought.” Although the laughter cut short; the previous moment was rather intense.
Sarah Jane wasn't laughing at all. She was thinking about what they overheard. “They're going to be even better for each other than we'd thought. I think they'll actually be able to heal each other's hurts.”
Martha shook her head, thinking about the comparison between her experience and what Rose had apparently hinted at. “I had no idea he'd been that unsure even then... If I'd known, I might've behaved differently toward him...”
Wilf waved to catch the others' attention. “I think our role in this is pretty much done. Except for being supportive and lending an ear or two if need be.”
Jack snorted. “Oh, I bet we might be needed, still. Time to look at other plays, though.”
Sylvia just sighed over the proof that she hadn't done quite right by her daughter. But how the bloody hell was she going to help her now?!
Jenny rolled her eyes. “I think we'll be in the Vortex for a few days. We're all going to need to recharge, so we can think for a while. Meantime, I think I'd better return those letters to where I found them. Who knows? Mum and Dad might actually want to trade.”
Jack smirked. “Oh, to be a fly on the wall for that conversation.”
Every other person on the link groaned. And shouted, “Shut it, Jack!”
Their little back-and-forth on how loyal the TARDIS really was to each of them didn't last long. They soon found that a little quiet moment of him holding her was... rather nice.
And this new element of domesticity was kinda throwing them for a loop. They weren't quite ready to fully face the memories of their shared dream head-on just yet...
So when Donna opened the door to her room, while still in the Doctor's arms, they weren't expecting the lights to go on without Donna flicking a switch. Or just what they found... Donna's eyes widened. “What are all those things? And did my room grow?!”
There were a lot of details and items that were new to Donna. But not to the Doctor, who couldn't believe his eyes. “I... They were in my room!”
Donna gasped. “The TARDIS... merged our rooms?!” She wasn't sure what to think of the Old Girl's presumption. But her voice softened as another thought hit: “Does that mean that she approves...?”
Feeling the flutters and not-so-helpful nudges from his ship, the Doctor blushed - but wasn't unhappy with the results. “Yep,” he breathed, a little stunned nonetheless as he lowered Donna to her feet.
He must mean on both counts, she realized when she glanced at his face. Okay, I guess I'll just go with it... She cleared her throat. “Well, I guess it works. I mean, I'm not keen on the idea of sleeping alone anytime soon...” The thought of being apart all night made her shiver.
The Doctor's eyes widened, and his hand grasped Donna's nearby one without thought. “Me, neither,” he
whispered.
She squeezed back, and sighed. “Anyway, I need to clean up. Too tired and too worried about Jenny to do it
last night.”
The words didn't quite register with the Doctor. “The room's clean. What do you have to clean up?”
Oh... Donna laughed over the reappearance of his obliviousness. “A bath, Sunshine! I mean myself!”
Then they clicked. “Oh!” And he never remembered his face - in any of his incarnations - burning that much. The secret fantasies about her in a bikini changed a bit... and left him unable to speak. Although it couldn't stop his mouth from moving.
Hope he doesn't have a stroke from thinking about me starkers... Donna smiled fondly as she shook her head. “If you can bear being apart for a little bit, you can make us tea and some breakfast. And we can talk while I'm in there... if you're sure you can be trusted with what's left of my virtue...”
The teasing only made his hands flutter aimlessly. It was disconcerting to feel his thoughts going at light speed but not making sense even to him.
Donna laughed. “Or not... We wouldn't want to offend any virgin sensibilities you still have, Martian Boy.” She planted a quick kiss on his lips and went into the bathroom - delighted, despite everything, over how easily she could still throw him for a loop. Good to know some things won't change...
He just stared after her. Still unable to think or move...
Chapter 2: Fashion of the World to Avoid Cost
Rating: a heavy T/PG-13, that may push toward M/R later in the story
Author: tkel_paris , aka KendraC
Summary: Sequel to “Shakespearean Cupids.” A distress call interrupts the Doctor and Donna's journey as a new couple, forcing them and Jenny to face mistakes he made... because of Rose Tyler...?
Disclaimer: Shakespeare's works are public domain - but I give credit to the Bard where its due. Doctor Who belongs to people on the other side of the pond - as some put it. I doubt I would've come up with this series if Series 4 had ended with more thought put into it... Then again, what do fanfic writers live for but to rewrite the episodes into something better...?
Author's Note for the Whole Story: Okay, people... You've seen one Shakespearean idea from me. Here comes the follow-up. I started Shakespearean Cupids without much of an outline, so I got surprised when Muse took it to the angst levels that she did. So this time, I started with a more detailed outline before I started writing. Now I know overall what I'm getting myself into with this story.
First off, this one - although I'll do my best to keep the humor that we all love in D/D stories flowing wherever possible - is going to have a much more serious tone. “Much Ado About Nothing” will still have influence on this story, but now we move to the more severe tones of “The Merchant of Venice” and “Measure for Measure.” You may wonder about the choices now, but given all the issues that our beloved now-no-longer-claiming-to-not-be-a couple have to deal with, I think you'll agree with the use of those two serious plays.
Also, Jenny's story arc needed a more serious backdrop to play out against. I don't promise to not give her another crash course in her Dad's life, but this time she won't be alone...
And brace yourselves. Each chapter is fixing to be on the lengthy side... At least it'll mean more story for you to enjoy. And keep the ideas coming! You never know what you might inspire!
And my beta inspired one hell of a plot bunny for later on in this story. Let's just say... be prepared to be freaked out... At least a little bit... (River style wink)
CHAPTER ONE: MODESTLY EXAMINE THEMSELVES
Awareness slowly came to Jenny's mind. It was like swimming in molasses. The fog she found herself in mentally started to unnerve her - until memories of the previous day flickered into being.
Another choking sob erupted from her lips. Nearly losing her parents... The whole River debacle... Then she noticed that she couldn't move much, and tried to scream.
“Shh...” The sound of her mother's voice startled her out of the crying, and Jenny turned toward it. Her Mum was lying next to her - holding one of her hands, Jenny suddenly realized, and she'd had an arm over her belly. As the warm and free hand stroked the side of her face, Jenny also realized that there'd been another arm over her belly - her father's. He was lying on the other side, holding her other hand.
The Doctor squeezed Jenny's hand. “It's over, Jenny. The nightmare's over. We're a full day past it.”
Just knowing that she was surrounded by her closest family soothed Jenny's frayed nerves, and allowed her to relax back into the bed. “You're really here...”
Donna sighed. It's gonna take a long time for her to heal, she thought. “Sleep alright?”
Jenny found a tiny smile. “I think that was what it's like to sleep like a baby.”
The Doctor managed a faint ghost of his usual grin. “That was the idea.”
Donna gently tugged on Jenny's hand. “Come on, let's get a little breakfast into you, and then we'll go from there.” She got up, making Jenny wonder how this would work since neither of her parents was letting go. But then her Dad picked himself up, and gently motioned her to follow her Mum - who, she then noticed, had removed her own ponytail sometime during the night and had her hair flowing haphazardly.
Which made a part of her mind wonder: Had her mother ever willingly been in her father's presence looking like she'd just rolled out of bed...?
The TARDIS had moved the kitchen entrance to right outside Jenny's room. So, the Time Lady vaguely realized, even the Old Girl is babying me... “I'm not that hungry,” she whispered.
The Doctor grinned, remembering more than a few times when he'd felt the same after an adventure that went poorly. “Then just tea and biscuits for you. I'll even open my own tin.”
Donna laughed, a little stunned. “You mean the one,” she demanded as they guided Jenny to sit on one of the dining chairs, “that you keep hidden?! What do you keep in there?!”
His expression was a strange mix of a smirk and a hurt pout. “Only the best ones, the ones that lift me a bit out of the doldrums.”
Are they not quite, Jenny noted silently, letting each other out of their sights...? How are they managing to not hit anything...?
Donna scowled as she poured water into the kettle and started it, darkly commenting, “You couldn't have shared those after Pompeii?!”
The Doctor, having just pulled that mysterious tin out of the cupboard, startled at the hint of disapproval. “Well, I've never shared them with anyone before! Do you expect me to change centuries of habits overnight?!”
She snorted. “No, but I expect to get to try the things that you enjoy! I might not like them, but at least I'd get another experience under my belt!”
Jenny laughed. A real, pleased laugh over things practically seeming normal again. As in before the plan was formed!
Her parents turned, surprised at the sound - and profoundly grateful. “There,” the Doctor said with his usual smile, “that's my little girl.” He plated a number of biscuits, and handed an extra to Donna. “You'll be perfectly fine soon enough!”
Donna rolled her eyes. Surely it'll take longer than you think, Sunshine! She bit off a piece, and snorted over the taste.
Jenny's eyebrows raised over the reaction. “What, Mum?”
Quickly chewing to be able to speak, Donna swallowed and had to tease her Martian boy. “Chocolate and banana?!”
The Doctor shrugged. “I change what I keep in there with each regeneration. This one likes both of those, and I found some lovely ones on one of my adventures on my own.
Which, Jenny realized, probably meant his time between meeting Mum and meeting Martha... She took a bite, not trusting herself to not comment disparagingly on a certain companion... Wait for the tea...
The kettle mercifully signaled, but it didn't stop Donna from shaking her head. Any other day, I'd continue my rant, but I guess I'll stop there. She absently bit into the biscuit again as she poured tea - not wanting to admit that it was one of the tastiest biscuits she'd ever had.
The Doctor noted that Donna hadn't indicated - aside from the exclamation when she tasted it - that she hated that flavor. Maybe I'll share a little more often, he thought. Turning to Jenny, who'd made quick work of what was on her plate, he raised an eyebrow. “Hungry after all?”
Jenny shrugged as Donna handed her a cup. “A bit,” she owned after swallowing. “But not now. I'd like to wait before really having a meal.” She blew over the cup, after letting the scents soothe her.
Donna sighed. “Oh, well. I guess we're cooking for just you and me, Spaceman. What'll it be today?”
Knowing he ought to help, the Doctor thought about what he could manage without embarrassing himself. “Well... We're pretty well stocked. I'll let you choose.”
Looking up from a sip, Jenny noticed something - which made her block out her parents' talk about what to cook. They're standing a lot closer than usual... If they get any closer, they'll be sharing breaths! And... their hands... They keep reaching for each other... And I felt their arms over me when I woke... They wanted to reach each other even in sleep...?! She put down her cup. “What's going on?”
That stopped them both. Simultaneously, they exclaimed, “What?!” And were startled at how in sync they were.
Jenny wanted to laugh, but felt it wasn't advisable. “Um... How about how close you're standing to each other? Or how much you're nearly touching - apparently without thinking about it? What happened to the two of you?”
Donna and the Doctor blushed. It was time... She cleared her throat. “Well, the whole story... I don't think we're quite ready to tell it, but...”
The Doctor's own smile matched the fondness in Donna's as he wrapped an arm around her waist - and his insides tingled when she returned the gesture. They met Jenny's stunned face as he said, softly, “We're together now. That's all right with you, isn't it?” He remembered her anger back when she was talking with Martha and Sylvia, and hoped she wouldn't remind him of his past mistakes...
God bless CAL! Jenny shrieked wordlessly and bounced out of her chair to run around to hug them both. “Oh, my God! This is what I wanted to happen! I knew you were perfect for each other! Now I can heal; something good came out of yesterday!”
Her parents blushed again, remembering the worst parts of their experience. It was just like one of his adventures to have considerable pain to go with the joys...
Jenny pulled out of the embrace. “Well, then, you don't need to mind me!” She grabbed her cup. “I'll keep myself occupied. You two go have some fun,” she called as she hurried out of the room. But then she stopped and stuck her head back in as an embarrassing thought hit her. “Just... please remind the Old Girl to muffle any sounds.” She didn't stay to watch the matching blushes bloom over their faces - but she giggled silently over throwing them for a loop. Got to tell my co-conspirators right now!
Donna recovered her voice first. “Oi, we need to talk with Captain Jack over what he tells her! He has no right telling our girl about the birds and the bees before we do!” Although she shivered a little over the ideas that the words planted. That interrupted post-wedding moment in CAL's world left her imagination trying to fill in the blanks...
The Doctor couldn't speak. He found himself more concerned over something else, something also prompted by the memory of that particular moment in the fantasy world. Oh, Rassilon, I don't know the first thing about what Donna might expect... or what to do...
Over the link, Jack pumped his fist in the air. “Yes! We are the only love-gods!” Oh, I'm good!
Sarah Jane laughed, shaking her head. Crazy hormonal fool... “And we didn't need the letters after all. I hadn't thought it possible.”
Martha grinned. You might think you're good, Jack, but I'm better! The Shakespeare part was my idea... “Congratulations, Jenny. Sounds like you might've helped them see the light.”
Jenny shrugged, feeling a bit of the euphoria come off. “Well, I'll admit that... the person I mentioned... seemed to help more than anything. She pushed them out of their denials, and I think things would've progressed anyway without the computer world.” She'd thrown a dressing gown on before going for her computer to signal the co-conspirators for the talk they'd agreed upon... just yesterday.
Sylvia demanded, “And you don't know what happened to them there?” Trapped as an energy signature... It doesn't seem possible!
When Jenny shook her head, Wilf sighed. “Well, it doesn't matter. But now comes the hard part.”
Jenny frowned. I thought coming and sitting in the TARDIS library would be the roughest thing I did all day. “What's that?”
Wilf smiled over his youngest girl's naivety. “Making sure they make it work.”
Sarah Jane nodded. “Yes, that's the part that all the romance novels in the world don't bother with. Everyone only cares about people getting together, which ignores the whole part of what actually happens after the whole 'happily ever after' bit.”
Jenny opened her mouth to comment, and then felt the room shift around her. She realized that an extra shelf appeared - largely blocking her view of the big reclining couch in the center of the room. A nudge came from the TARDIS: Be quiet, Jenny. They're coming.
She flinched. “Blimey!” She grabbed pen and paper from her side. “Hope you've got some of this,” she hissed at the screen. “We're getting company!”
There was a quick hustle as each person grabbed what was near - although Sylvia rushed away to get the needed implements. Jack grinned, “Well, now we get to be the eavesdroppers.”
Jenny couldn't help it. She had to flip him that rude gesture from a week ago.
“Jenny,” her grandmother and great-grandfather admonished.
But they didn't get any further; the door opened and they heard footsteps slowly enter. Everyone held their breath a moment.
The Doctor sighed, holding Donna's hand tighter. “Are you ready for this?”
Jack's grin grew. Martha quickly wrote: Shut it, Jack!
Donna took a deep breath and nodded. We can't let that place ruin this one.”
Sarah Jane wrote, as they heard the two walk into the room, and turned her paper to show: Was it really that bad, Jenny?
The couple walked to the couch - which hadn't quite been there when Jenny entered earlier - and slowly stretched out to rest side by side. She lay on his right side, and he was closer to the door. It was as much because neither wanted to let go of the other's hand to change positions.
It also meant that Jenny could just barely see them without being noticed herself. Glad Jack can't see this, she thought idly as she wrote an answer to Sarah Jane: Worse.
They both sighed as they relaxed into the over-sized cushions. “No infected shadows,” Donna reflected aloud, “no emergency, no one injecting themselves into our lives... Feels almost strange to have such a long moment of peace.” And I'm too tired to even care that my hair's a tangled mess...
Sylvia had the next comment: Did she feel threatened by this... person you mentioned?
The Doctor snorted. “I never said it was a quiet life I lead.” She must remember the whole of our Adipose Industries adventure, after all...
Jenny smirked at her father's words as she showed her reply: Yes. She was the catalyst for Mum ceasing her denial - which I'm thankful for.
“But,” Donna commented, “did you ever stop to enjoy the moments of silence and peace whenever they came along?”
Jack, raising an eyebrow at what he overheard, quickly wrote: Hope I get to meet her one day.
Oh, my God... Jenny hoped her shudder was all the answer the Immortal needed... After those comments about dating androids, the last thing I need is for those two to meet!
The Doctor sighed. She's got me there... “No. You've reminded me of that. Guess I've spent too muc time running. Be it in exile or from events I caused... The quiet always seemed like an opportunity for all my regrets to pile on me.”
Sarah Jane felt tears forming. She had to cover her mouth in case a cry tried to emerge. No one had a
thought they wanted to voice over that line...
“Oh...” Donna reached with her free hand to rub his scalp. “My poor Spaceman... Carrying the burdens of
the universe on your shoulders alone for too long...”
The Doctor closed his eyes as her fingers slowly and gently worked out tension that he hadn't realized he was carrying. It was a sign of how comfortable he was with Donna that he wasn't embarrassed by the deep purr he let out.
Jack's eyebrows raised in intrigue, and Jenny rushed to write: She's just massaging his head, you pervert!
He had a ready retort: Obviously the wrong one...
It took each of the others on the link all their willpower to not groan aloud. Typical Jack, Martha silently griped as she rubbed her forehead. Sylvia and Wilf just didn't want to hear anything like that, and glared at him. Sarah Jane just shook her head in warning as Jenny glowered at the randy Captain.
Donna smiled fondly as she watched stress melt away - just from that one area. “No one ever did this for you?” What a shame if this is the first time...
Jenny stopped to look up, which managed to relieve the tension brought by Jack just being himself. A chance
to learn about Dad's people...?
The Doctor had to try several times to make his voice work. “Never... knew... but I... should've guessed since... Oh, that's nice... Since Time Lords... are... touch telepaths...”
Donna froze. “You mean you can hear what I'm thinking?”
Jack grinned, but he didn't bother to write his obvious thought: That would be handy...
Her hand freezing drew the Doctor out of his induced stupor. He forced his eyes to meet Donna's. “No. No, that'd require...” He swallowed as potential implications hit him. “I'd have to activate the link, since humans aren't naturally telepathic.”
Jenny frowned, her eyes briefly flickering toward Jack. Could've fooled me, she thought as she recalled how well Jack seemed to read his human counterparts.
Donna thought about that. “But it... Is it possible outside of that thing you did on the Oodsphere?”
Everyone looked at Jenny, wondering what they were talking about. Jenny shrugged; she was at a loss.
The Doctor nodded slowly. “I... I could start the process of us developing a bond that would allow us to hear each other's thoughts at times - without what I did so you could hear the Ood Song.”
Wilf wrote quickly: Do you know what he's on about?
Jenny shook her head, quickly scribbling: There's so much I still don't know about being Gallifreyan. I know more about being human!
Donna tried to figure out the implications, and was drawing a blank. I need to know more... “What would that mean for us? Could we start it now?”
Six pairs of eyebrows raised in curiosity. And other mixed reactions...
The Doctor took a deep breath. How to explain this when things are so new between us...? “Donna... It'd be a permanent link between us, binding us together... forever.” And it reminded him, once again, of the fantasy world...
Six jaws dropped. This, Sarah Jane vaguely thought, is a learning experience for us all...
Donna saw the intensity in his gaze, and thought she saw hints of remembering yesterday in his eyes. It gave her a clue. “You mean like...” She hesitated, not sure if she should voice the thought, but not knowing what else to say. “Like... a form of marriage...?”
Sylvia's eyes went wider than anyone else's. Oh, my God, what does this mean for my daughter?!
The Doctor nodded slowly. “I'm not entirely sure how it'd work, but I know it's possible. One of my companions married a Citidel guard, and even had a child.”
Donna gasped. “Then... we could...”
Wilf's eyes lit up, and he nudged Sylvia - who was surprised over the feelings the idea engendered...
The Doctor found a tiny smile. “Yeah.” And it scares me just how much I... really like the idea of little versions of Donna running around the TARDIS...
Martha smirked, and wrote in the silence: Better get ready to be a big sister, Jenny.
The silence was long enough that Jenny was able to write: I wonder what my responsibilities would be.
Donna cleared her throat. Looking that long into the deep eyes of the alien she'd grown to love brought a number of memories back. And none of them made her comfortable. Instead, she had to voice concerns. “Wouldn't this affect your bonds with-” She cut herself off at his shaking his head.
“No, Donna,” he said quietly but firmly. “I was never bonded with any of my wives.”
Jenny's eyes popped the widest of the group's. What the hell...?!
“Time Lords,” the Doctor tried to explain to a clearly shocked Donna, “weren't supposed to get too close to anyone. Including their own family. Affection even between parent and child was discouraged since there'd be a separation when we're exposed to the Temporal Schism.”
“You mean,” Donna whispered in horror, “that you lived nearly all your life without knowing what it's like to be loved?”
Everyone froze. Jack couldn't move his mouth or blink. The others all covered their mouths to prevent cries
or whimpers over the very idea that Donna's words painted.
Must not cry, the Doctor told himself, must not cry... “Closest I came to that was my... youngest grandchild.” He had no idea of the shock that created in the other part of the room, and continued to an enraptured Donna, “She joined me when I was first exiled, took the human name Susan Foreman, and looked after the old man that I physically was then.”
“That,” Donna had to ask, “was your... first self?”
He nodded. “Nothing hurt more than when she fell in love. With a human man,” he added, not quite keeping the hysteria out of his laugh at the irony. “I... didn't part on good terms with her.”
“But,” Donna interjected, “is she somewhere outside of the Time Lock?”
Jenny sucked in a breath. I might have family I could visit...?
The Doctor nodded slowly. “I'm not sure how I'd be received...”
Donna squeezed his hand, and cupped the side of his face. “Will you try? And let Jenny and me help you two
reconcile?”
Wilf quickly wrote: How much do you know about your father's family?
It seemed too good to be true, but how many times had Donna been right about matters of emotions? The Doctor returned the squeeze. “Okay, but... I'm not ready.”
While he'd been thinking, Jenny was able to write, and show while he did speak: Not much, evidently.
Donna suppressed a snort. “No one's ever ready to face someone they hurt, or who hurt them. But,” she added sagely, “I think we should wait until we've... figured things out more...” Another thought hit her, and it brought every one of her insecurities to bear on her conscious mind.
The Doctor's eyes widened as he could see Donna withdraw a bit. “What is it?”
Everyone on Jenny's screen raised their eyebrows as Jenny's expression took an alarmed turn. What now, she
mouthed.
Donna thought about shaking her head and keeping it to herself. But, she quickly realized, haven't I been
encouraging him to not hold things in? And won't this worry me always if I don't voice it...?
The Doctor took both of her hands. He made sure his voice was as gentle as could be. “Donna, I can't be the only one who admits to difficult things. What's troubling you?”
The conspirators had to remind themselves to breathe. They all knew they were about to hear something that maybe they shouldn't know about...
Donna swallowed. Here goes what could ruin what's growing between us... “I just...” Must force it all out... “God, I want to be the one you've chosen-”
“And you are!” The Doctor couldn't believe that she'd be the insecure one after all they went through the previous day. Although he could believe that being the strong one had taken a lot out of her...
The conspirators shared a smile. Their gleaming eyes shared in the triumph of success.
Donna sighed. And blurted out the rest before she could stop her mouth: “But I can't help but worry about
where I'd stand if - somehow - Rose came back.”
That shocked him.
But not as much as it shocked the conspirators. Jenny clenched her fists. God, she mouthed, why did she
have to mention that creature's name?!
Martha's face paled. She could see where Donna's fears came from, having lived through feeling like second-best to the memory of the previous companion.
Sarah Jane flinched. Oh, God... How much does he still feel...?
Jack froze stiff. I'd have to distract Rose somehow, he knew. Because these two are too good for each other!
Surely Ianto would understand that it'd be temporary...
Sylvia and Wilf clasped each other's hands. This might mean more hurt for their Donna, and they could do
nothing about it...
The Doctor, for the first time, really saw how much he'd allowed the specter of one companion to shadow the
experiences of the subsequent ones. And here, he knew, was the one who would be hurt the most by it...
Donna wasn't surprised by how silent he was, and felt a need to withdraw. But she couldn't. The Doctor took
both of her hands in his left, and drew her against him with his right arm. He... Is he...?
Jenny watched with baited breath. And the others listened equally attentively. Especially when she dashed
out, with considerable relief: He's pulled her into his arms!
The Doctor looked right into Donna's teary eyes, and knew he had to come clean about something that was
becoming clearer to him. “Remember when I told you about what happened the last time I saw the Ood?”
To the conspirators, it was a non-sequitor that made them frown. And gave them one thought: What?!
Donna blinked, surprised. She had to think a moment to recall what he meant. And then it hit her. “Yeah,
on Kroptor. The Impossible Planet, you said it was also called. Rose was there, right?”
He nodded. “There was a moment when it seemed like we'd lost the TARDIS to a quake.” He couldn't quite
use the term 'earthquake' since they hadn't been on Earth at the time.
Donna gasped. “Oh, God, that must've felt terrible. You have a link with her!”
The Doctor closed his eyes a moment against the memory of how painful that had felt. He cleared his
throat to continue the story. “Rose started talking about getting a mortgage.”
Sarah Jane and Martha's eyes popped wide. Oh, they thought as one, that doesn't sound good... They could
both remember certain things that suggested that he hadn't reacted well to it.
“Donna,” the Doctor said, looking back into her eyes, “I nearly had a panic attack. In the midst of a dangerous situation, where the Ood were... possessed by a creature that looked like it could've been the Devil itself.”
Once again, eyebrows raised and jaws dropped, but Jenny - unlike the others - had a clue about what
had happened. Benefits of researching Dad's past companions...
He continued, not giving Donna a chance to comment, “I've been thinking about that reaction ever since. I had a lot of time to think about it when Martha and I were trapped in 1969.”
Martha flinched, but didn't write any comments. Maybe I'll finally get some answers!
Donna adjusted her hands so they were holding his. I know that was a rough time for both of them... She nodded, hoping he saw the encouragement to keep talking; he clearly, she thought, needed to get it out.
“At first I thought I just wasn't the type to handle domestic things. That what my last self had hoped for was a whimsy that could never be.” He sighed and grinned in consternation. “But then I realized just how much the things we do on a daily basis qualify as domestic, and I'm not bothered by any of that!”
Donna's eyes widened, and she had to interrupt. “Not for a moment...?”
He shook his head. “And I think I know why.” He had to swallow again to get the words out, and he forced himself to overcome every instinct he'd built over his entire life because this was too important to screw up. He breathed, “Because when I'm with you, I feel like I'm home. I don't have to run from my past. I can face it, and it doesn't hurt so much. What I said in that dream world we were in is truer than I knew: I finally can relax and be myself. No one's putting me on a pedestal that I can't come off of to just be a person. I have found a true friend and partner... in you, Donna.”
There wasn't a dry eye in the room at that point. Tears were falling - at varying paces - from eight pairs of eyes. Only Jack and Wilf were just barely holding them in check. The women were all too moved to restrain theirs - even the disbelieving Martha, who slowly started writing.
Donna managed to swallow enough to make her voice work, although it was shaky. “Then... if she...”
The Doctor sighed, not liking how much Donna had tormented herself with thoughts of self-doubt. A long-standing habit, he realized sadly. And filled him with a new determination. “Then I'd have to break her heart, because I won't let you go to anything but your own old age.”
Jack's jaw dropped farther than anyone's. And he had competition for most stunned expression...
Donna's tears fell rapidly, and she leaned in to bury her face in his neck. Oh, my God... He's... He's choosing me over her...! Oh, God, please don't let Rose find a way to cross back over; I don't want her to get her heart broken again...!
Martha turned her paper to the screen: Did he actually just talk about his own feelings...?
The Doctor felt tears fall from his face into Donna's hair as he pulled her closer and released her hands to run his other one through the ginger locks he adored - planting a gentle kiss on the top of her head. As he absently undid the tangles she'd muttered a few complaints about earlier, he realized that she, too, had never felt truly loved. Yes, she'd known the love of family members, but never from a man... It filled his hearts with an anger that he had to keep her from detecting; she needed him to calm her, and so he had to push aside any ideas of avenging the slights she'd suffered over the years.
Although he was going to find out the names of every man who ever hurt her or contributed in any way to her abundance of self-doubt. Whoever Sylvia and Wilf didn't know about, surely her friends would - and he was absolutely sure that he could charm them into giving him the information on where to find those losers... so he could ruin their lives a bit...
Oh, he wouldn't kill them; he remembered telling Jenny how killing changes a person, and he still wanted to steer as far from his actions stemming from the Time War as possible. Mind, it would take a lot more restraint if it turned out that anyone had physically harmed Donna. Then, he thought, I suppose my revenge will have to be a bit more public...
Nothing less would calm the Oncoming Storm he could feel brewing slowly... One that might have been developing ever since he overheard Jenny and Martha and Sylvia...
Jenny was a little concerned over the tense play of emotions on her Dad's face. The only thing she could figure out, she wrote: Looks like he's hurting because she's hurting.
Sylvia promptly answered: Let's hope he's strong enough at the moment for the both of them...
Concerned over Donna's continued tears, a sign of how deep the hurt ran, the Doctor pulled her into an upright position so he could lift her up - bridal style. She might need the comfort of her own room right now, he thought.
The movements brought Donna back to an awareness of her surroundings. “Oi,” she protested, although the continuing tears made it sound less forceful than usual, “what are you doing?”
He met her gaze when it lifted from his neck. “Will you let me take care of you for just a little while, my Earthgirl? So we can both take care of our Spacegirl?”
Jenny had to swallow a snort. Her mother had dubbed her that during that first time meeting Jack and the others, although she hadn't used it since. Suppose it fits... I am my Dad's girl...
Donna had to sigh in the face of the Puppy-Dog Eyes. Blimey, I'm gonna have to relearn to steel myself against those... “Oh, all right, you bloody prawn,” she acquiesced, pretending to not like it at all. Really, she thought, I'm not used to having someone just want to take care of me - and be able to do it!
Relishing the temporary change in their dynamic, the Doctor grinned - letting go, for the moment, of his revenge fantasies - as he carried her toward her room. “You know, Donna,” he teased, “your insults are starting to sound like signs of affection.”
Donna lightly poked him in the chest. “Watch it, Sunshine! Do you think any of your secrets are safe? Your ship sides with me every time!”
The Doctor managed to close the door with his foot, deliberately trying to forget that moment from their shared dream. His answer didn't make it through the door.
Jenny couldn't stop a laugh - although she kept it quiet. “He carried her out! And he combed her hair with his fingers!”
Jack laughed. “Oh, he's even more far gone than we'd thought.” Although the laughter cut short; the previous moment was rather intense.
Sarah Jane wasn't laughing at all. She was thinking about what they overheard. “They're going to be even better for each other than we'd thought. I think they'll actually be able to heal each other's hurts.”
Martha shook her head, thinking about the comparison between her experience and what Rose had apparently hinted at. “I had no idea he'd been that unsure even then... If I'd known, I might've behaved differently toward him...”
Wilf waved to catch the others' attention. “I think our role in this is pretty much done. Except for being supportive and lending an ear or two if need be.”
Jack snorted. “Oh, I bet we might be needed, still. Time to look at other plays, though.”
Sylvia just sighed over the proof that she hadn't done quite right by her daughter. But how the bloody hell was she going to help her now?!
Jenny rolled her eyes. “I think we'll be in the Vortex for a few days. We're all going to need to recharge, so we can think for a while. Meantime, I think I'd better return those letters to where I found them. Who knows? Mum and Dad might actually want to trade.”
Jack smirked. “Oh, to be a fly on the wall for that conversation.”
Every other person on the link groaned. And shouted, “Shut it, Jack!”
Their little back-and-forth on how loyal the TARDIS really was to each of them didn't last long. They soon found that a little quiet moment of him holding her was... rather nice.
And this new element of domesticity was kinda throwing them for a loop. They weren't quite ready to fully face the memories of their shared dream head-on just yet...
So when Donna opened the door to her room, while still in the Doctor's arms, they weren't expecting the lights to go on without Donna flicking a switch. Or just what they found... Donna's eyes widened. “What are all those things? And did my room grow?!”
There were a lot of details and items that were new to Donna. But not to the Doctor, who couldn't believe his eyes. “I... They were in my room!”
Donna gasped. “The TARDIS... merged our rooms?!” She wasn't sure what to think of the Old Girl's presumption. But her voice softened as another thought hit: “Does that mean that she approves...?”
Feeling the flutters and not-so-helpful nudges from his ship, the Doctor blushed - but wasn't unhappy with the results. “Yep,” he breathed, a little stunned nonetheless as he lowered Donna to her feet.
He must mean on both counts, she realized when she glanced at his face. Okay, I guess I'll just go with it... She cleared her throat. “Well, I guess it works. I mean, I'm not keen on the idea of sleeping alone anytime soon...” The thought of being apart all night made her shiver.
The Doctor's eyes widened, and his hand grasped Donna's nearby one without thought. “Me, neither,” he
whispered.
She squeezed back, and sighed. “Anyway, I need to clean up. Too tired and too worried about Jenny to do it
last night.”
The words didn't quite register with the Doctor. “The room's clean. What do you have to clean up?”
Oh... Donna laughed over the reappearance of his obliviousness. “A bath, Sunshine! I mean myself!”
Then they clicked. “Oh!” And he never remembered his face - in any of his incarnations - burning that much. The secret fantasies about her in a bikini changed a bit... and left him unable to speak. Although it couldn't stop his mouth from moving.
Hope he doesn't have a stroke from thinking about me starkers... Donna smiled fondly as she shook her head. “If you can bear being apart for a little bit, you can make us tea and some breakfast. And we can talk while I'm in there... if you're sure you can be trusted with what's left of my virtue...”
The teasing only made his hands flutter aimlessly. It was disconcerting to feel his thoughts going at light speed but not making sense even to him.
Donna laughed. “Or not... We wouldn't want to offend any virgin sensibilities you still have, Martian Boy.” She planted a quick kiss on his lips and went into the bathroom - delighted, despite everything, over how easily she could still throw him for a loop. Good to know some things won't change...
He just stared after her. Still unable to think or move...
Chapter 2: Fashion of the World to Avoid Cost