Right when I was thinking I was The Perfect Woman...
I've resolved recently to be as self-aware as possible. Hey, you can never go wrong with being as possibly aware of your self as..possible...right?
It's bizarre to me how easily forgiving I am based entirely on appearances - literally. And I mean this mostly applying to people (MEN), but it can go around to other things. See: bad habits, bad clothes, etc.
This is my extrapolation upon the thought introduced in the last paragraph. Let's take a guy. A guy who used to be a big part of my life, and I'm not pinpointing one, because there's been many. So this guy probably used to be a good friend of mine, probably a love interest, and for some reason we had a royal falling out. There are a few men (though I'm not sure I'm old enough to call my male-comrades men yet) who've been in my life, and the reason for the Royal Fall-Out is because they treated me like shit. Or just got really plain weird. And it's a really, really good thing that we are no longer friends. And I know that, because dammit, I'm self-aware.
But it gets weird. I'll see them around, or look at an old picture of them, and say "Hell, that friendship was pretty awful. But he sure is attractive. Wow, I miss him. Maybe I should call him." And I won't. But then I'll go through an epic guilt and remorse cycle lamenting the loss of him, and wishing he was back. Why? Because he was attractive - and that's the only reason! This would be the perfect time to make an interesting segue into a debate over how valid, and how big a role, attractiveness is in when it comes to "true" love and commitment - but alas, I am too tired. And alas is a nice word to say. Anyway, now I'll segue back to where I was.
I thought I was way less shallow than that. I guess...not. I have so many qualities and characteristics in guys that I like that have nothing to do with their outer layer, and I'm by no means instantly interested in every hot guy I see. But for some reason, seeing something beautiful that used to be in my life just kills me.
And the worst part is, they might still treat me poorly. They would probably not have changed whatsoever. But I guess it takes forever for me to figure out he's not worth my time.
Normally I would never write about this, but this just plain annoys me. Who the hell cares what their love interest looks like?? Me..apparently.
It's bizarre to me how easily forgiving I am based entirely on appearances - literally. And I mean this mostly applying to people (MEN), but it can go around to other things. See: bad habits, bad clothes, etc.
This is my extrapolation upon the thought introduced in the last paragraph. Let's take a guy. A guy who used to be a big part of my life, and I'm not pinpointing one, because there's been many. So this guy probably used to be a good friend of mine, probably a love interest, and for some reason we had a royal falling out. There are a few men (though I'm not sure I'm old enough to call my male-comrades men yet) who've been in my life, and the reason for the Royal Fall-Out is because they treated me like shit. Or just got really plain weird. And it's a really, really good thing that we are no longer friends. And I know that, because dammit, I'm self-aware.
But it gets weird. I'll see them around, or look at an old picture of them, and say "Hell, that friendship was pretty awful. But he sure is attractive. Wow, I miss him. Maybe I should call him." And I won't. But then I'll go through an epic guilt and remorse cycle lamenting the loss of him, and wishing he was back. Why? Because he was attractive - and that's the only reason! This would be the perfect time to make an interesting segue into a debate over how valid, and how big a role, attractiveness is in when it comes to "true" love and commitment - but alas, I am too tired. And alas is a nice word to say. Anyway, now I'll segue back to where I was.
I thought I was way less shallow than that. I guess...not. I have so many qualities and characteristics in guys that I like that have nothing to do with their outer layer, and I'm by no means instantly interested in every hot guy I see. But for some reason, seeing something beautiful that used to be in my life just kills me.
And the worst part is, they might still treat me poorly. They would probably not have changed whatsoever. But I guess it takes forever for me to figure out he's not worth my time.
Normally I would never write about this, but this just plain annoys me. Who the hell cares what their love interest looks like?? Me..apparently.