report
Report
I am sick. I am still ill. On a daily basis I experience... nausea, diarrhea, vomiting occasionally, excessive salivation that has a foul taste and often increases nausea if swallowed, dizziness, impaired vision, abdominal pains, perspiration, abnormal heart rates... those are symptoms that I can note on that have been occurring for over a month. [in a more severe sense then what has been occurring for years now.]
Heightened emotions and senses.
Abuses that have been occurring for years now that might not be so apparent are... memory lapses and numerous abuses done to myself when having a memory lapse. The causes are unknown.
Tampering with food and personal hygiene products seems to occur quite often.
Ah, god, and I am getting acne again. It's hilarious too, when I mention any given symptom of this forced disease that I am trapped in and the person who the conspiracy aims my pleas to thinks that being concerned about acne is ridiculous. Growths are being harbored underneath my skin!!! Those same ignorant people then mention the starving kids in 3rd world countries or concentration camps… it does not make me 'feel better' to think of people hurting! Nor do I think sacrificing my own health is progressive towards a better world. I doubt that I would be privileged to know what causes acne to occur on my skin and if I could afford a consultation with a dermatologist [legitimately]… it seems that the conspiracy of masochists [tools, enforcers, and the like] would continue the memory lapses and actually apply what causes acne to grow on my skin. I always end up getting feedback from the most ridiculous ignorant people. I suppose, I have to expect that when I am unable to direct messages to correct audience.
I am hardly able to read, write, or speak... and when I can it seems I am experiencing an 'abnormal psychosis' of some kind at the same time.
I am prevented from keeping appointments ... even if I do keep an appointment I am only drugged and abused.
I have attempted to seek help many many times. I am only drugged again and the abuse continues. I have been refused medical attention.
I am psychologically terrorized. Bad/negative/unwanted life experiences are forced on me. People any where near me attempt to do what they can to provoke and irritate me... in most cases.
My god. I thought of the poverty stricken and hungry people today and it upset me. What actually further upset me is that I am not permitted to partake in a 'cure'. I know there would be a staged event and I'd end up being forced to continue being psychologically terrorized and partaking in assisting some lazy corporate 'asshole' who is part of the staged event. Something like that.
If I am forced to contact an 'adult' who might be able to bring me to a hospital or who could allow me to recover... all that occurs is that I am put on high amounts of drugs that leave me in a catatonic state in which case the abuse -mostly and including psychological terrorism- continues.
I can only appear to be 'insane' to other people.
I believe I may have food poisoning... I can't be sure... it's what the 'voices in my head' are saying.
I continue to be restrained and forced to endure psychological terrorism and to be abused in every sense... physically, emotionally, mentally, etc....
I have been made to believe that my social records indicate financial debt and theft. Apparently, it is all so severe that I cannot possible adjust or fix the problems. I am unable to find help for these issues. I might as well be a felon who has to spend the rest of my life paying off large sums of money while being employed for below minimum wage [because people like to make exceptions for me] overtime in some place with foreigners who don't know how to run a business and are always on crack or dope.
The voices say to "'call my 'parents'" for assistance. I refuse to do so because this 'bullshit' shouldn't be happening and because they haven't been able to help me in the past with the below:
I need to be informed about aspects that concern my injuries and what has occurred. I need to consult an investigator, doctor and a lawyer and, possibly, further enforcement need be issued.
Some people around do no more then remain in character as 'completely annoying dumb shit heads'. 'Like, ok, who can be more annoying' or something.
A few people have remained either professional or seemingly kind although there is always an incident where they seemingly must 'shit on my face'.
Denny's didn't turn their paperwork in on time and my paycheck is late.
I have limited vocabulary and can hardly collect information and present it here. I do not have full access to myself! Nor to the resources I need to exist.
Some limitations are falsely labeled as being 'supervised' which is incorrect because the supervision seems to be non-applicable to myself and entails inappropriate violations of my human rights… I am not allowed to know my options, rights, or what choices I have or to be fully informed of terms and conditions that apply to myself.
"why'd you push the red button?"
"I don't know where the fucking red button is, what is looks like because it isn't actually a red button, or what it does!"
Short term memory loss seems to prevent me from learning and that has caused misunderstandings. It appears that the confusion and misunderstandings are being maintained. I almost feel like short term memory loss and high amounts of ignorance are forms of retardation.
I am not certain of what the non-fictional situation is. I cannot even quite guess. The 'psychological terrorism' continues to keep my mind full of 'stories'.
The living unit does not have drinkable water. It seems to dirty itself and soil itself. I am not allowed to be employed with an income that can support myself. When I do have $$ I am not allowed to use it to take care of myself. Richard does not seem to ever want to be around me. He seems to act or behave in a way and then must run off. I don't know what about me is alive in the case that it was otherwise.
Richard has invited a homeless elderly man to live at the living unit.
I am made to appear as different characters in which real measures are actually taken against me. A few examples are: I am made to appear 'prissy' or 'snobby'. If I wasn't sick and drugged and non-existent I would comment that I don't care for such characters let alone being one myself. -Apparently- it is a danger to keep pets around myself because I am a 'dog hater' and little kids hate me… and Richard is a small child. Also been accused of being pseudo or a fraud who seeks to serve injustice by incorrectly exploiting an innocent victim or to make myself a glorified victim. There's the, disruption to society character. etc....
I am too sick and sedated and when awake -usually- too psychotic to present myself or to do pretty much... anything at all.
I have to excuse myself now because apparently there is snake venom in my saliva and if I swallow the excessive amounts filling my mouth I will become sick and have to vomit... again.
I'd like to be informed, recover, actually exist in my own life, and spend time with my personal life. If there is any point in living and perhaps I could share positive life experiences that would also be ideal.
I know this isn't specific or complete.
This isn't supposed to be put through the shit generator and come out as a 'be careful what you wish for'. Although it appears to be my only audience.