Santo Daime in Japan
A long tale I've been putting off writing about for ages...
In July, I was in Japan, and was invited by some friends to join a Santo Daime "work". As I think I mentioned in "Constructing realities: My first salvia experience", I had a few years experience with LSD in my early-mid twenties, but had not gone there for about 10 years. Now after a year of listening to Psychedelic Salon and through that Dopefiend/Psychonautica and C-Realm, I was ready to re-enter psychedelic space with a more shamanistic, healing intention oriented to personal and spiritual growth, and with a more responsible experienced mindset.
In case you don't know, Santo Daime is a syncretic religion combining Catholicism with ayahuasca use and Afro-Indian circle dancing. Here's the Wikipedia page, and a couple of good online videos - Santo Daime Documentario Fantastico (10 mins) and Empire of the Jurimadam (Part 1, Part 2) (45mins).
A group of 5 of us drove to the venue - a church in a nearby city. There was my friend Daime-san (Australian), his Japanese wife Daime-chan and 3 year old son Daime-kun. We collected a couple more Australian and English friends - Bassman, M (the only other first-timer for the day) and the Psychedelic Yogi. (Names created with descriptive intention...) The ceremony was to begin around 12 o'clock, on a warm rainy-season day, and run until about 7 or so, after which things wound down. I had no idea what to expect, except lots of singing and some kind of ayahuasca experience...
The church was in an open field surrounded by trees and a hundred metres or so from the road, and was a wide open space a bit like a school gym. In the middle was a star-shaped table, laden with flowers and pictures of important figures in the Santo Daime faith. Immediately around the table were chairs for the musicians (djembes, guitar, accordion, trumpet), and surrounding that were concentric circles divided up into boxes about 1 metre x 80cm, marked out with masking tape on the floor. Along three sides of the room were long carpets for people to sit or lie on - the men on one side, women on the other, and families and children at one end (next to the lawn). The opposite end had a big mural of Jesus and Mary, the toilets and front entrance. Buckets and boxes of tissues were placed around the room.
I put my tabla against the wall, settled down and established a comfortable space next to Psychedelic Yogi, who had injured his foot and planned to spend the day lying down with eyes closed listening to the music and exploring inner space. The "done thing" is to sing the songs and dance in the circle for most of the time - they go through about 100 songs. (Have a look at this page for some streamable Santo Daime songs.) He told me that as this was my first time, I was free to do anything I liked. "If you strip naked and run around on the lawn, you'll get away with it." In other words, relax and enjoy the ride.
There were about 50 adults there and 10 or so kids. Probably half the men were foreigners, everyone else Japanese. Everyone wore white. M and I were first-timers and wearing whatever white clothes we had, but most of the men had white tailored suits, and all the women had white dresses with dark green sashes, and little coronets.
Daime-san gave me a book with all the songs - in Portuguese. We were to start from number 29 and go through to the end - about 120 songs, I think. I paid 8000 yen (about $A80) to a senior Japanese man. Apparently if the Brazilians were here, it would be twice as much. Daime-san advised me that if I wanted more I should ask for more - don't be shy.
The music started, and people slowly started taking their places in the circles, each person in their own little box-space. The dance was four steps to the left, then four to the right. Men on one side, women on the other. A few dancers had shakers, and everyone had their own book. It was quite strange trying to work out how to pronounce Portuguese. The music was very cheerful and upbeat, and the singers joyful, if a little apprehensive about what was to come... In between songs, people would call out the names of various saints, everyone responding "Viva!"
After 10 minutes or so, people started queuing up to receive the holy sacrament, Santo Daime aka ayahuasca. A small glass of brown liquid, sour-bitter taste, a bit like stomach fluids... Then back to singing and dancing. It was a bit fun, not immediately meaningful to me apart from a few words here and there - Jesus, Mary, Deus, amor...
After about 30 minutes I started feeling pains in my belly and heat in my head. I wondered if I'd be sick - and people were certainly starting around us - but was OK. The heat in my body and slight fuzziness in my head was making concentrating on reading from the book, following the songs and dancing quite challenging fun. About 20 minutes later I had to go to the toilet for a couple of quick diarrhoea bursts - nothing unusual for a seasoned India-traveller like me. Bit of a laugh.
The songs went on, occasionally I felt tired or woozy and sat down for a bit, reading through the songs or just gazing around smiling if that was too much. I wasn't feeling trippy at all, but definitely intoxicated and there was a distinct feeling of heat in my head and body.
A while later - maybe an hour or so - we received the second serve of Santo Daime. Psychedelic Yogi caught my eye and said "It's strong". Good, I thought - the trip should get going soon then.
But it continued much as before - some belly-pains a while after drinking, intoxicated but not really trippy. While singing and dancing I wondered what I was doing, but was committed to going fully into the experience and singing and dancing as much as I could. Trance states, group mind and all that. It was lots of fun! :-) There were quite a few times I doubted that I had the right book - I'm still not sure about how to pronounce Portuguese. It was also fun watching the people - there were some fabulous characters there! Some really powerful women, with wonderful smiles. A lot of people feeling joy and spiritual ecstasy, holding on with big smiles in case they lost all control, it appeared.
One woman came to the table - the heart of the music and the experience - and seemed to be possessed. Others around the place were doing much like me - sometimes dancing, sometimes resting. Others were really suffering.
I tried to tune and play my tabla a couple of times but it didn't really come so well. Around that time, Psychedelic Yogi leaned over to me and said "When I said 'strong' before I wasn't talking about the Daime, I was talking about you!" Aah, so I'm appearing strong, hey? Maybe next dose I should take a bigger one...
After a few hours of continuous singing and dancing, it was time for a break. A senior women announced that "the work was still going on so we should remain quiet and respect those doing work." Some people were really working - lots of vomiting and emotional wrangling going on. But these people were regulars, I reminded myself...
During the break everyone was commenting on how strong the Daime was, so when I commented that I didn't feel it so much they told me to have a double dose next. However in the end I just asked for one good full glass.
I started to feel sick and actually had a quick spew - that ayahuasca, stomach-fluid taste. Wash it down with some water and back to the circle... I danced for a while - maybe 6 or 7 songs - still wondering exactly what I wanted out of this. Just get into the experience and you'll see... Those women on the other side of the circle are so glorious, such smiles, such voices, such rejoicing! It was so wonderful, just to be in the music.
It occurred to me that if the Brazilians were here, the singing would be so much stronger.
Sometimes I'd think of going to my tabla, but then think, "No I should stick with the songs and dancing and full Santo Daime experience." "No, after this song, I'll play tabla." "No stick with it..." Then I gave in after a quick trip to the loo settled in on my tabla.
That beautiful tabla sound fitted in so perfectly with the music. I wondered whether I was playing or the Daime was playing my hands, and imagined I felt something hitting the drums at a slightly different time to my hands, pulling my rhythmic feel into line with the music. I was playing with full heart and sound, right inside the music. I was very sensitive to being part of the group through our sound, and should my tabla rise above the music too much I instinctively pulled back.
4th and final serve of the holy Daime.... And straight back to my tabla. I'm enjoying this meeting of spirits.
My mind was working in a different realm - glimpses of salvia consciousness were coming back, a feeling of connection to the group, to Gaia, to the trees outside, and especially to the living spirit of tabla.
Thoughts of KMO and the C-Realm came up - I'll have to blog this experience (I had no idea it would take so many months though...) Through the internet we're all connected, just like the fractally circular patterns on my tabla cover, just like our brains.
Then I closed my eyes
Wow.... things really started going on then. Each sound of my tabla generated rainbow spirals, the visions moving along in rhythm with the music, visions rolling over and over in time with the music from thought to thought, visions of vines intertwining.
A song finishes... should I open my eyes? No, it'll be OK. Rustling papers, shifting feet, coughing, spewing.... Aah, the next song, here's the rhythm and there's that beautiful round bass tone of the bayan (left-hand tabla). Such a warm comfortable voice, all embracing. Here's the exquisitely pleasurable sound of the tabla, beating the rhythm but with such warm loving tones. Tabla is a living spirit and it's so close to me, just sitting cross-legged in meditation pose, it's so natural to put my hands up and feel the tabla there.
It occurred to me that perhaps I was the first tabla player to meet ayahuasca, and that this instrument was perfectly suited to this music. Daime was happy to have tabla there. (I've since realised that surely other tabla players - maybe someone I know - have played during ayahuasca ceremonies...)
A few songs went by in this way, and the experience started getting more intense - too intense to play. Just sitting and listening to the music and experiencing the visions was overwhelming. Keep posture straight, body awareness...
After some time I open my eyes. I'm sweating, my shirt seems drenched. The music goes on. All things and all moments are connected. If the singularity comes, it's going to be a loud place with all the drumming going on!
Some dark moments.... Will the police come? Will my father come? Is this actually an asylum? What time is it? I have a concert tomorrow...? How long will this go? All night?
Don't worry, just breathe, everything will be OK. These are good people. Daime-san will look out for you. The church felt a safe place. The music kept going, and was stable like a boat in a tempestuous river. Some of the songs seemed to go on forever!
Sometimes some people would come and try to encourage me to get up and sing and dance. Especially when it got to the last song. I felt completely incapable of doing anything, including speaking. I just smiled and gestured, it's OK. I was feeling divine bliss - "Everything's going to be OK." These were such wonderful people, everyone was smiling at each other now. Such a feeling of love and community.
Things wound down, and eventually I became capable of speaking, moving around, having some of the post-event snacks and juice, discussing the experience with others. Everyone was smiling and beaming love. It was really beautiful.
Psychedelic Yogi told me that at one stage (while sitting after playing tabla), I'd had a kind of seizure. I'd sat up bold upright, then fallen back against the wall, stiff for a while, then sat up again and been OK. I have absolutely no memory of this and in fact I thought he was joking with me. I was feeling such joy and bliss that that seemed a minor hiccup in the journey.
I don't think I've ever smiled so much as I smiled in the week following that day. I felt such connection to Earth, people around me, life, the moment. I had 4 concerts that week - all Indian classical concerts - and they were wonderful. I absolutely fell in love with tabla, more than ever before - that warm, comfortable sound. My playing was intuitive, warm, friendly, powerful, free. So I felt - and so the musicians and audiences commented. Wonderful.
I feel ayahuasca is an incredibly powerful healing magical plant. I wonder about shamanistic ceremonies but for now I'm so happy to have been part of Santo Daime and definitely plan to seek out the Santo Daime group in Australia. It felt very safe and yet flexible enough to accommodate me playing my tabla, which is all I really want to do.
I think it was interesting that I didn't really "break through" until I started playing tabla. Perhaps for "normal" non-musical people, singing and dancing is sufficient to really take them out there. However for me, the easiest mode of meeting the divine is through my tabla - I've tuned my system that way, it's my habit. Perhaps my life of seeking through music has inured me to the level of experience to be obtained through singing and dancing, but I was capable of reaching an even higher plane through my tabla. Or perhaps I just blocked my release through singing and dancing because I'm just more comfortable with tabla...
Anyway, I can say that I love tabla. And I love Santo Daime. Beautiful.
In July, I was in Japan, and was invited by some friends to join a Santo Daime "work". As I think I mentioned in "Constructing realities: My first salvia experience", I had a few years experience with LSD in my early-mid twenties, but had not gone there for about 10 years. Now after a year of listening to Psychedelic Salon and through that Dopefiend/Psychonautica and C-Realm, I was ready to re-enter psychedelic space with a more shamanistic, healing intention oriented to personal and spiritual growth, and with a more responsible experienced mindset.
In case you don't know, Santo Daime is a syncretic religion combining Catholicism with ayahuasca use and Afro-Indian circle dancing. Here's the Wikipedia page, and a couple of good online videos - Santo Daime Documentario Fantastico (10 mins) and Empire of the Jurimadam (Part 1, Part 2) (45mins).
A group of 5 of us drove to the venue - a church in a nearby city. There was my friend Daime-san (Australian), his Japanese wife Daime-chan and 3 year old son Daime-kun. We collected a couple more Australian and English friends - Bassman, M (the only other first-timer for the day) and the Psychedelic Yogi. (Names created with descriptive intention...) The ceremony was to begin around 12 o'clock, on a warm rainy-season day, and run until about 7 or so, after which things wound down. I had no idea what to expect, except lots of singing and some kind of ayahuasca experience...
The church was in an open field surrounded by trees and a hundred metres or so from the road, and was a wide open space a bit like a school gym. In the middle was a star-shaped table, laden with flowers and pictures of important figures in the Santo Daime faith. Immediately around the table were chairs for the musicians (djembes, guitar, accordion, trumpet), and surrounding that were concentric circles divided up into boxes about 1 metre x 80cm, marked out with masking tape on the floor. Along three sides of the room were long carpets for people to sit or lie on - the men on one side, women on the other, and families and children at one end (next to the lawn). The opposite end had a big mural of Jesus and Mary, the toilets and front entrance. Buckets and boxes of tissues were placed around the room.
I put my tabla against the wall, settled down and established a comfortable space next to Psychedelic Yogi, who had injured his foot and planned to spend the day lying down with eyes closed listening to the music and exploring inner space. The "done thing" is to sing the songs and dance in the circle for most of the time - they go through about 100 songs. (Have a look at this page for some streamable Santo Daime songs.) He told me that as this was my first time, I was free to do anything I liked. "If you strip naked and run around on the lawn, you'll get away with it." In other words, relax and enjoy the ride.
There were about 50 adults there and 10 or so kids. Probably half the men were foreigners, everyone else Japanese. Everyone wore white. M and I were first-timers and wearing whatever white clothes we had, but most of the men had white tailored suits, and all the women had white dresses with dark green sashes, and little coronets.
Daime-san gave me a book with all the songs - in Portuguese. We were to start from number 29 and go through to the end - about 120 songs, I think. I paid 8000 yen (about $A80) to a senior Japanese man. Apparently if the Brazilians were here, it would be twice as much. Daime-san advised me that if I wanted more I should ask for more - don't be shy.
The music started, and people slowly started taking their places in the circles, each person in their own little box-space. The dance was four steps to the left, then four to the right. Men on one side, women on the other. A few dancers had shakers, and everyone had their own book. It was quite strange trying to work out how to pronounce Portuguese. The music was very cheerful and upbeat, and the singers joyful, if a little apprehensive about what was to come... In between songs, people would call out the names of various saints, everyone responding "Viva!"
After 10 minutes or so, people started queuing up to receive the holy sacrament, Santo Daime aka ayahuasca. A small glass of brown liquid, sour-bitter taste, a bit like stomach fluids... Then back to singing and dancing. It was a bit fun, not immediately meaningful to me apart from a few words here and there - Jesus, Mary, Deus, amor...
After about 30 minutes I started feeling pains in my belly and heat in my head. I wondered if I'd be sick - and people were certainly starting around us - but was OK. The heat in my body and slight fuzziness in my head was making concentrating on reading from the book, following the songs and dancing quite challenging fun. About 20 minutes later I had to go to the toilet for a couple of quick diarrhoea bursts - nothing unusual for a seasoned India-traveller like me. Bit of a laugh.
The songs went on, occasionally I felt tired or woozy and sat down for a bit, reading through the songs or just gazing around smiling if that was too much. I wasn't feeling trippy at all, but definitely intoxicated and there was a distinct feeling of heat in my head and body.
A while later - maybe an hour or so - we received the second serve of Santo Daime. Psychedelic Yogi caught my eye and said "It's strong". Good, I thought - the trip should get going soon then.
But it continued much as before - some belly-pains a while after drinking, intoxicated but not really trippy. While singing and dancing I wondered what I was doing, but was committed to going fully into the experience and singing and dancing as much as I could. Trance states, group mind and all that. It was lots of fun! :-) There were quite a few times I doubted that I had the right book - I'm still not sure about how to pronounce Portuguese. It was also fun watching the people - there were some fabulous characters there! Some really powerful women, with wonderful smiles. A lot of people feeling joy and spiritual ecstasy, holding on with big smiles in case they lost all control, it appeared.
One woman came to the table - the heart of the music and the experience - and seemed to be possessed. Others around the place were doing much like me - sometimes dancing, sometimes resting. Others were really suffering.
I tried to tune and play my tabla a couple of times but it didn't really come so well. Around that time, Psychedelic Yogi leaned over to me and said "When I said 'strong' before I wasn't talking about the Daime, I was talking about you!" Aah, so I'm appearing strong, hey? Maybe next dose I should take a bigger one...
After a few hours of continuous singing and dancing, it was time for a break. A senior women announced that "the work was still going on so we should remain quiet and respect those doing work." Some people were really working - lots of vomiting and emotional wrangling going on. But these people were regulars, I reminded myself...
During the break everyone was commenting on how strong the Daime was, so when I commented that I didn't feel it so much they told me to have a double dose next. However in the end I just asked for one good full glass.
I started to feel sick and actually had a quick spew - that ayahuasca, stomach-fluid taste. Wash it down with some water and back to the circle... I danced for a while - maybe 6 or 7 songs - still wondering exactly what I wanted out of this. Just get into the experience and you'll see... Those women on the other side of the circle are so glorious, such smiles, such voices, such rejoicing! It was so wonderful, just to be in the music.
It occurred to me that if the Brazilians were here, the singing would be so much stronger.
Sometimes I'd think of going to my tabla, but then think, "No I should stick with the songs and dancing and full Santo Daime experience." "No, after this song, I'll play tabla." "No stick with it..." Then I gave in after a quick trip to the loo settled in on my tabla.
That beautiful tabla sound fitted in so perfectly with the music. I wondered whether I was playing or the Daime was playing my hands, and imagined I felt something hitting the drums at a slightly different time to my hands, pulling my rhythmic feel into line with the music. I was playing with full heart and sound, right inside the music. I was very sensitive to being part of the group through our sound, and should my tabla rise above the music too much I instinctively pulled back.
4th and final serve of the holy Daime.... And straight back to my tabla. I'm enjoying this meeting of spirits.
My mind was working in a different realm - glimpses of salvia consciousness were coming back, a feeling of connection to the group, to Gaia, to the trees outside, and especially to the living spirit of tabla.
Thoughts of KMO and the C-Realm came up - I'll have to blog this experience (I had no idea it would take so many months though...) Through the internet we're all connected, just like the fractally circular patterns on my tabla cover, just like our brains.
Then I closed my eyes
Wow.... things really started going on then. Each sound of my tabla generated rainbow spirals, the visions moving along in rhythm with the music, visions rolling over and over in time with the music from thought to thought, visions of vines intertwining.
A song finishes... should I open my eyes? No, it'll be OK. Rustling papers, shifting feet, coughing, spewing.... Aah, the next song, here's the rhythm and there's that beautiful round bass tone of the bayan (left-hand tabla). Such a warm comfortable voice, all embracing. Here's the exquisitely pleasurable sound of the tabla, beating the rhythm but with such warm loving tones. Tabla is a living spirit and it's so close to me, just sitting cross-legged in meditation pose, it's so natural to put my hands up and feel the tabla there.
It occurred to me that perhaps I was the first tabla player to meet ayahuasca, and that this instrument was perfectly suited to this music. Daime was happy to have tabla there. (I've since realised that surely other tabla players - maybe someone I know - have played during ayahuasca ceremonies...)
A few songs went by in this way, and the experience started getting more intense - too intense to play. Just sitting and listening to the music and experiencing the visions was overwhelming. Keep posture straight, body awareness...
After some time I open my eyes. I'm sweating, my shirt seems drenched. The music goes on. All things and all moments are connected. If the singularity comes, it's going to be a loud place with all the drumming going on!
Some dark moments.... Will the police come? Will my father come? Is this actually an asylum? What time is it? I have a concert tomorrow...? How long will this go? All night?
Don't worry, just breathe, everything will be OK. These are good people. Daime-san will look out for you. The church felt a safe place. The music kept going, and was stable like a boat in a tempestuous river. Some of the songs seemed to go on forever!
Sometimes some people would come and try to encourage me to get up and sing and dance. Especially when it got to the last song. I felt completely incapable of doing anything, including speaking. I just smiled and gestured, it's OK. I was feeling divine bliss - "Everything's going to be OK." These were such wonderful people, everyone was smiling at each other now. Such a feeling of love and community.
Things wound down, and eventually I became capable of speaking, moving around, having some of the post-event snacks and juice, discussing the experience with others. Everyone was smiling and beaming love. It was really beautiful.
Psychedelic Yogi told me that at one stage (while sitting after playing tabla), I'd had a kind of seizure. I'd sat up bold upright, then fallen back against the wall, stiff for a while, then sat up again and been OK. I have absolutely no memory of this and in fact I thought he was joking with me. I was feeling such joy and bliss that that seemed a minor hiccup in the journey.
I don't think I've ever smiled so much as I smiled in the week following that day. I felt such connection to Earth, people around me, life, the moment. I had 4 concerts that week - all Indian classical concerts - and they were wonderful. I absolutely fell in love with tabla, more than ever before - that warm, comfortable sound. My playing was intuitive, warm, friendly, powerful, free. So I felt - and so the musicians and audiences commented. Wonderful.
I feel ayahuasca is an incredibly powerful healing magical plant. I wonder about shamanistic ceremonies but for now I'm so happy to have been part of Santo Daime and definitely plan to seek out the Santo Daime group in Australia. It felt very safe and yet flexible enough to accommodate me playing my tabla, which is all I really want to do.
I think it was interesting that I didn't really "break through" until I started playing tabla. Perhaps for "normal" non-musical people, singing and dancing is sufficient to really take them out there. However for me, the easiest mode of meeting the divine is through my tabla - I've tuned my system that way, it's my habit. Perhaps my life of seeking through music has inured me to the level of experience to be obtained through singing and dancing, but I was capable of reaching an even higher plane through my tabla. Or perhaps I just blocked my release through singing and dancing because I'm just more comfortable with tabla...
Anyway, I can say that I love tabla. And I love Santo Daime. Beautiful.