a series of unfortunate events......
yeah...i stole my subject from the new jim carrey movie (w/ music from edward scissorhands). omg 2nite has been horrible. i havent cried that hard since me n josh broke up. it was horrible. ok well, i went 2 joshs 2nite 4 like an hour or so, n he didnt talk much bc he was upset bc of babs stupid ass story (fuck u babs 4 posting that!!). n we argued a lil bit abt goin 2 the beach, which im now definitely not going. neway, b4 that danny told me 2 call him later that nite. so i called him back as i was leavin joshs n josh saw me on the phone n naturally gets pissed off. so hes textin me w/ his anger n suspicion n whatnot n i get upset again. so i go 2 morgan's looking 4 some comfort.....comfort i did not find. i was upset n all they did was bitch abt the fact that they think i should date danny n break up w/ josh. which is obviously not what i wanted 2 hear. well i get mad n throw my phone on the ground (dumb idea) n they take it n wont give it back. danny has it n wont give it back n i was mad bc josh was textin me, so i slapped danny in the chest.........and he yelled @ me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ive never seen him get so mad. he yelled @ me n walked off n went in the house. i was like :O!!! that made me soooooooooo upset. i still cant believe the look on the his face, he was truly pissed @ me. i felt like shit. i was speachless....i got i the car n started cryin n then he came 2 apologize. i wanted 2 just drive off, but i couldnt bc he was in the doorway thing. eventually i left, n started cryin. i drove around cryin a lil bit till i couldnt see the road so i pulled over. i havent cried that hard since me n josh broke up. i swear, i am so not responsible for what i say, do, or feel. this dpms thing is serious. i cant control nething....so i finally get home n i dont wanna talk 2 ne1 4 the rest of the nite. n danny fuckin shows up n wont leave. babs let him in n now he wont leave bc he wants 2 "talk", n im pretty much ignoring him. i fuckin hate babs 4 doin this 2 me. if she asked me 2 make one of her friends leave id do it 4 her, she thinks shes doin whatz best 4 me but shes so not! i actually considered breakin up w/ josh n not bein friends w/ danny nemore just 2 make things ok. i know i cause them alotta anguish n it upsets me alot. maybe it would be best 4 the both of them. omg i wish he would leave...i really do. i can feel him, watching me type from the couch n it irritates me so. i told josh we need 2 rethink our relationship, which we do. bc neither one of them held out on their end of the deal. danny still calls n comes over late @ nite and josh stil gets mad/upset....i know josh cant help the way he feels, but danny can back off a lil bit. ok yeah, now im def. mad @ him. he yelled @ me n thatz something josh has never done. (ok, jen stop comparing them). yeah thatz what my inner voice said....n yes i have an inner voice...shut up!!! lol. ok newho, i went 2 server training 2day @ work. it was 4 fuckin hours long!!!!! but i learned alot abt the food n stuff. i cant wait till i know everything. i start training thurs. idk how ima go see spiderman tues nite. i have a ticket, but i have no way of going unless i sneak out. i def. dont wanna stay @ morgans n hear them whine abt me n danny, n i know danny would be there most of the nite, which will upset josh highly. butchyeah, im def. not goin 2 the beach. i guess its a good thing he yelled @ me, maybe i needed a wake up call. ugh, he's still here! y cant he just respect the fact that i need 2 be ALONE 2nite!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i need 2 type this in n get it off my chest, i dont need 2 get flustered again n say things i dont mean.....i do need 2 go 2 bed tho. i got work 2mrw. im thinkin maybe if i sit here n type long enuff he'll get bored n leave.........ugh idk what 2 do!!!!!!! i knows im tryin 2 avoid him. I DONT NEED 2 TALK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BUT I DO NEED SOME FUCKING ANAPROX N ZOLOFT W/ A SMIRNOFF CHASER!!!!! haahahahahha.....i crack myself up. omg im laughing @ myself. loud 2!!! ok now im gettin loopy, i gotta get some sleep! ttyl u fuckin stupid journal thingy!!!