Day 15, Duty
So last night I explained the joys of our huge 'night off'. The opposite of that is being on duty. There is only one person on duty any given night for boys and a separate one for girls. All duty really entails is: leaving the event of the evening as soon as it gets over at 9 (except Tuesdays, Fridays, Saturdays), taking the campussed students to their rooms, and being around to unlock doors or be the first responser to a situation. Duty usually isn't that bad of a deal. The only times it is frustrating is when you want to hang out after the evening's event or if something comes up that you need to deal with.
So, as for why you're really here, I am very frustrated right now. With the program, with the students, with some of the staff, and especially with myself. I know that this is something I'll get over. The downside is I had hoped I was done with feeling this way for the summer. I was super worried coming here and every once in a while I'm reminded of why. Don't get me wrong, I love most of the staff. But I just feel that I am doing a poor job or that maybe there's one more student out there I could connect with and help. I don't know. It's all very emotional and irrational right now. I would guess that by tomorrow evening (after I play racquetball and badminton for a few hours) I'll either be doing better or I'll be so tired that I won't be worried about it.
So, as for why you're really here, I am very frustrated right now. With the program, with the students, with some of the staff, and especially with myself. I know that this is something I'll get over. The downside is I had hoped I was done with feeling this way for the summer. I was super worried coming here and every once in a while I'm reminded of why. Don't get me wrong, I love most of the staff. But I just feel that I am doing a poor job or that maybe there's one more student out there I could connect with and help. I don't know. It's all very emotional and irrational right now. I would guess that by tomorrow evening (after I play racquetball and badminton for a few hours) I'll either be doing better or I'll be so tired that I won't be worried about it.