New Hobbies?
I need to figure out how to enable dark mode for this website, the white is burning my retinas.
I more-or-less arbitrarily decided I was going to attempt to journal regularly again. I haven't re-read the few posts I've made in the last couple years, I may've already decided that and failed lol.
I think at a certain point I was attempting to "catch up" the LJ on stuff that had happened during the 10 or so years I didn't update, but that could take forever and I believe some of those stories could come out organically if I just keep coming here as an outlet.
I also see there are some options for adding some style, pictures, and etc to these posts. I'm not sure I care about that, but we'll see.
Anyhoo, I don't tend to make a big deal about my birthday. I get awkward around a bunch of attention and I certainly don't like being the center of it. I think since this was a milestone year, my close ones wanted to do it up, so 40 was cool. My folks came to my house last Sunday and honestly made me feel like a kid again for a few minutes lol.
My mother and I have had a strained relationship the past handful of years due to a lack of being able to control political and religious opinions needing to be a central focal point of conversation for her. We disagree strongly on a lot and went for nearly 2 years without speaking; I'll take a fair amount of disrespect from certain loved ones if I can justify it a certain way..IE "oh she thinks I'm going to burn in Hell, I get it." But I've still got a line and she crossed it there for a while.
That being said, we've really been attempting to reconcile our relationship past year or so, and she was the architect of my birthday this year. Ended up getting me a workshop table, stool, and scroll saw. I have to be honest, I didn't even know what the fuck a scroll saw was before she got it for me. I still don't, really, i haven't opened it yet. But she got it in her head I may like it as a creative outlet and honestly, she may be right. Just that whole concept of "hey, all of this stuff is a surprise to you because you don't actually want any of it, but it's pretty cool." that sort of gets lost out of gift-giving the older you get, it was neat opening those gifts.
While I was telling my folks they really didn't have to do all that, my old man was like "well, you only turn 40 once and this is a big deal...plus I dunno if we'll.." and I feel like he was about to say "be around when you turn 50" thought better of it, floundered a bit, then awkwardly said "will have to do it again when you're 100."
And I tried to joke our way out of that depressing-ass line of conversation by saying I was going ahead and putting in my order in for a 4x4 Wheelchair for off-roading, but man. He's only in his early 60s, but sometimes I feel like he has himself dead and buried already. I hate that for him. But on the other hand, he's objectively right. You hope to hit a ripe old age of 80+, but nothing is promised.
I made sure to take some pictures and video for posterity.
Kathy got me some pants and flannels I'd asked for. Ya boy is putting on some weight within the past year and am decidedly in the "it's easier to buy bigger clothes than diet." category still, so I needed some clothes that didn't look schmedium on me lol. She sat on my lap and sung me happy birthday over a carrot cake with a burning 40 candle on it, after eating a sushi dinner. I'm getting to be mega sentimental anymore; I had to blink water out of my eyes.
We're having Thanksgiving at our house next week, so I've got some painting to do today. We've been in the process of fixing it up to sell and have a lot of spots where we repaired drywall and cracks that still need to be sanded and painted.
I've been trying to be consistent with posting to a youtube channel, gaming vids. I've recently upgraded from the entry-level video editor I'd been using for the past couple years to Resolve, so I've been learning my way around that. It's been overwhelming and has slowed my output down, but I think it'll be worth it in the long haul. I've also been considering starting to try my hand at making music videos. Maybe picking some songs I like and making videos for them, I have a lot of fun cheefin' and editing video. I'll end up spending a few hours today playing around with that program.
I'm listening to the Cause for Alarm / Warzone split, on "Craft Recordings" on Spotify lol. All the old Victory Records shit is under Craft nowadays, apparently cause Tony Victory was a dweeb that did bad business.
What's been interesting about my music tastes as I've gotten older is that I'm not really fucking with much metal anymore. I'll do dungeon synth quite a bit, roots death metal on occasion (Cannibal Corpse, Deicide, etc), nostalgic black metal here and there. But I listen to shitloads of punk and hardcore nowadays. I love the energy. I been getting into Crusty shit and everything lol. Still love skate punk. Still lots of Hip Hop but after I finished the project I was working on, I feel like my brain needed a break so I've probably listened to less Hip Hop in 2023 than I have in 20 years.
I'll likely end up posting the few projects I've worked on here at some point. I think I'm mostly done with making music for now. I don't get inspired in that direction much anymore and seems like I've been using Video Editing as a creative outlet mostly. We never say never, but I will say I just don't give a shit about making music as much as I once did.
There is a chance I have to work 12's on Monday and Tuesday. I'll know Monday morning...on the one hand, I'll have Wednesday off until next Monday. On the other, 12 is a loooong day to be at work. We'll see.
Time to get the day started.
Peace.