Strange Thinking...
During the first days of professional development that we had this year, we had this speaker come in and talk with us about making sure we are sensitive to the students' Latino backgrounds and to really take into consideration what it means to have to hide a part of your identity in order to attend school. I've somewhat had experience with an activity like this due to Prism and all the different activities we did between that and my WGS classes about sex, gender, and sexuality. Well anyway, here's the activity he had us do.
Write down your name. Any name you like to be called.
Write down the sex and/or gender that you most identify with.
Write down your religion.
Write down one more important thing about yourself.
And here's what I wrote:
Brenda
female
Methodist (nonpracticing)
teacher
Then we had to cross one off.
Brenda
female
Methodist
teacher
And another.
Brenda
female
Methodist
teacher
And lastly, someone else had to cross one off for me.
Brenda
female
Methodist
teacher
Notice what is left? Teacher. How this that the identity that's left? How is that the identity I chose to keep?
I'm making a decision right now. This choice will be changed. Teacher is not the identity being kept in that scenario. Me, my name, and everything I am is what I'm keeping. That is the identity I CANNOT compromise.
I am still me. My career is being a teacher, but my life is not teaching. It can't be. Not like this. I need to have a life outside the school, outside the students' needs, outside the bullshit that's going on in my building and in my district. I'll find ways of making myself happy and feel like me again. But it seems like I need to think of myself as something other than a teacher.
I hope this makes sense.
Write down your name. Any name you like to be called.
Write down the sex and/or gender that you most identify with.
Write down your religion.
Write down one more important thing about yourself.
And here's what I wrote:
Brenda
female
Methodist (nonpracticing)
teacher
Then we had to cross one off.
Brenda
female
Methodist
teacher
And another.
Brenda
female
Methodist
teacher
And lastly, someone else had to cross one off for me.
Brenda
female
Methodist
teacher
Notice what is left? Teacher. How this that the identity that's left? How is that the identity I chose to keep?
I'm making a decision right now. This choice will be changed. Teacher is not the identity being kept in that scenario. Me, my name, and everything I am is what I'm keeping. That is the identity I CANNOT compromise.
I am still me. My career is being a teacher, but my life is not teaching. It can't be. Not like this. I need to have a life outside the school, outside the students' needs, outside the bullshit that's going on in my building and in my district. I'll find ways of making myself happy and feel like me again. But it seems like I need to think of myself as something other than a teacher.
I hope this makes sense.